Disclaimer: I don’t own Buffy or Batman: the Animated Series. Buffy and related characters belong to Whedon. Batman and related characters belong to WB and DC Comics.
A/N: This is loosely tied to one of my earlier fics for the August Fic-A-Day entitled, “Just Playing Around.” But you don’t have to read that one to read this one. Otherwise, just a little bit of fun here. There’s no real setting for this within the Batman: the Animated Series universe, but this is set post-season 7 of Buffy. Enjoy!
It was supposed to a snatch and run. That’s what Buffy had said. So when Dawn had offered herself up for the task, she was certain that it was every bit a piece of cake as her older sister had described it. So she had said no to idea of having a couple of slayers following along. Instead, she had only taken Andrew with her—a tech guy, as she had explained.
Dawn had been quick to tease Faith about her blowing the Wayne Benefit—giggling every time she had stated it just that way—but she was beginning to understand. There was just something about Gotham City. It just attracted the weird and the strange, which was turning out to include weird and strange situations as well.
“Andrew, can you hear me?” Dawn whispered, pressing her hand to her right ear.
“Only if you don’t press into the mic. I told you, Dawn, that hand-to-ear thing is just for the movies, so knock it off!” his high-pitch whine said directly into her ear, causing her to flinch.
“Sorry, sorry,” she whispered, fighting hard to keep her hand down at her side. “So the diamond’s in here?”
She had never dreamt of being a theft. Even when she had had that case of kleptomania, that still had nothing to do with the actual act of stealing the items. But Dawn would be lying if she said that she did not find what she was doing a whole hell of a lot of fun.
The Shadow Men’s Diamond—called the Dark Diamond by the exhibit—was a cursed object, an item created by the Shadow Men as a defensive strike against evil. And Buffy didn’t want it just on display, willy-nilly, for everyone to see. Or to steal, something that Gotham was known for.
So Dawn was standing on the roof of the museum, looking down upon the diamond through the skylight. A chilly breeze caught her heavy ponytail, blowing it over her shoulder.
“So, um, Andrew… I repel down into the museum, put this little device you gave me on the case, wait for it to do its thing, grab the diamond, and leave?”
“So, um… why am I in this snazzy black outfit and mask?”
She could almost imagine Andrew’s geeky blush as Dawn surveyed what could only be described as a heroic catsuit, a little black mask over her eyes.
“How often do we get to pretend to be superheroes, Dawnie? Especially in a city known for the Batman!”
Dawn rolled her eyes, opening the wide latch in the skylight.
“Whatever. Good thing we took out the alarm on this window, though.”
“Well, of course. Now, make sure your rope is secured. Buffy will kill
me if anything happens to you.”
But Dawn was several steps ahead of him, already leaning over the hole. With a smile, she pushed off, the line making a small zipping
noise as she fell. It stopped her with a soft tug just a little closer than arm’s length from the top of the diamond’s display case. She reached into her pocket, pulling out the little metal device—no bigger than an oversized jawbreaker—and put its black suction cup to the glass.
“It’s on the glass.”
“Wait for it, Dawnie. Oh, and close your eyes! You know… just in case.”
Dawn followed his advice just seconds before ice cold glass shattered, throwing a couple of the larger shards up toward her.
,” she growled, reaching down for the diamond.
“Well, lookie here!” came an even higher pitched, distinctly female voice from across the room.
Dawn looked up, eyes wide. A woman, dressed entirely in a jester’s costume, stood with a bright smile on her ebony-painted lips. On one side of her stood a woman in an actual
catsuit and on the other, a woman with pale green skin and bright red hair. Dawn bit her lip. Anyone who know anything about Gotham knew who these three were: Harley Quinn, Catwoman, and Poison Ivy.
“Looks like we’ve caught a fly in our trap,” Ivy said.
Dawn grabbed up the diamond while Andrew chattered in her ear, “Was that Harley Quinn and Poison Ivy! Oh my God, Dawn… I would give anything
to be you right now! Oh, is Ivy really as green as she looks in pictures! Details, details!”
“Well, um, I’ve gotta go,” Dawn said, hitting the retract button on her rope.
Nothing happened. She was still just handing there. A sizzle of electricity sounded from somewhere in the shadows along with something that sounded a lot like vines growing. The three villainesses walked leisurely up to Dawn. Catwoman grinned, pulling the diamond effortlessly from her hands.
“Now that we have what we came for… I think we’ll leave our little amateur friend here for the Bat to snatch,” she said, turning on heel and walking away.
Ivy and Harley both blew kisses as the three started off back into the shadows. Dawn swung limply on the rope.
“My rope’s stuck,” she hissed to Andrew, before adding aloud, “That diamond’s cursed!”
Harley stopped with a frightened jump, turning back to Dawn. “What?”
Ivy shook her head. “She’s just trying to get us to give it back to her, Harl. Ignore the newbie.”
“Yeah, exactly! I don’t want it to hurt anyone!”
Catwoman joined her friends, her raised brow evident even from under her mask.
“Really? And what could it possibly
do to hurt us?”
What followed next was one of those moments that one only saw in sitcoms. There was a bright flash of light, presumably from the diamond, and when it cleared, the three villainesses were nowhere to be seen, leaving the stone to fall to the floor with a loud clatter. Dawn’s brow furrowed.
“Andrew? Andrew, get me out of here!”
“I’m working on it. I’m working on it!”
Dawn crossed her arms as she began to slow spin against her will.
“Where are Ivy, Harley, and Catwoman?” Andrew asked.
“Help! Help us!” three tiny voices cried.
Dawn sighed. “I think they’re in
“Huh. Makes sense. Not the first time we’ve come across things trapped in other things. Anya told me about the troll. But we should still grab it.”
“Yeah. Easier said than done.”
She wasn’t going anywhere soon, so she began to stretch as far as she could downward. Her fingers weren’t even beginning to graze it. Dawn began to swing herself, but that didn’t work either.
“How’s it coming on this stupid rope?”
“Almost, just hold on.”
Dawn continued to swing, still trying in vain to get the diamond.
“Need a hand?” a deep voice that sounded like what Dawn thought shadows would—if shadows could talk—asked.
A hand landed on her shoulder, stopping her swinging as she looked up. Covered by shadow with only the outline of his body and his white eyes visible, the famous Batman loomed over her. She sighed, shaking her head.
“It’s not what it looks like.”
“Enlighten me. Because it looks like you were trying to steal this diamond.”
“I was, but only because it’s cursed. And Harley Quinn, Poison Ivy, and Catwoman are trapped inside of it.”
He arched a brow, and she was sure that he thought she was crazy. But, that was when the night decided to give her a break and the tiny voices of the three villainesses started to cry out again from within the diamond. Batman blinked, clearly surprised.
“How?” he asked after a moment of examining it from afar.
Dawn shrugged. “I don’t know how it works. Only that it’s cursed. My people were just going to store it away… you know, so this
“Dawn, Dawn! I got the rope fixed!” Andrew shouted as it jerked, pulling Dawn up at a rapid pace.
As she hung from the ceiling, looking down at the Batman and the diamond, she shook her head.
“My tech guy isn’t much of a tech guy… but I think he could help you out.”
It could have been the blood rushing to her head, but she thought she saw the vigilante smile.
“Sounds like a plan.”
Discaimer: I don't own the images here. Lips brush can be found at redheadstock.deviantart.com