Pairing: Anya/Batman (NonShip)
Disclaimer: I don’t own Buffy or Batman. Buffy and related characters belong to Whedon. Batman and related characters belong to DC Comics and WB.
Warnings: Spoilers for previous one-shot of mine.
A/N: This one follows “Inner Demons.” I’m so happy to have made it this far in the TTH Fic-A-Day, so I decided it was time for a follow up to one of my earlier fics. The setting for this is sometime after Xander left Anya at the altar as far the Buffy timeline goes. For Batman, it’s just set sometime in the fourth season. The title of this fic is inspired by the AC-DC song “Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap.” Enjoy!
“Anya Jenkins?” a deep voice growled from the shadows just beyond the large windows of Anya’s Gotham apartment.
The vengeance demon jumped, whirling around to face the voice.
“I’m warning you… I’m not as frail as I seem,” she said.
With that, the legendary Batman slipped into view. Anya sighed, plopping back down onto her couch, picking up the fashion magazine that had previously held her attention. The Dark Knight took a couple more steps into the room, looming over the tiny blonde. Anya yawned and flipped a page.
“Is there something in particular
you wanted with me?” she asked without looking up.
“I know what you are, Anyanka.”
That drew her eyes up to the blank whites of his mask. She blinked once or twice, sitting a bit more rigidly than before.
“And that is?”
“A vengeance demon. And I also know you’re the one who was responsible for this
He tossed a folded newspaper into her lap. She flipped it over to its cover page, rolling her eyes at the headline, which was something about a large dinosaur spotted out near the Gotham River. She pushed the paper aside, rising to her feet to shove a finger into Batman’s face.
“What gives you the freakin’ right to just break into women’s homes? I mean, what kind of pervert are you? You come in here, after God knows how long you’ve been there watching me, and then accuse me of some crazy dinosaur story. Leave. Now.”
Batman looked very unmoved by this rant. Anya rolled her eyes, pouting, and sat back down on the couch, crossing her arms.
“So I caused it,” she said. “What are you going to do about it? Arrest
“No. I’ve come here to discuss Nightwing.”
She arched a brow. “Come again?”
Batman leaned in ever so slightly, narrowing his eyes.
“I know that he’s been coming to you for little rendezvous. I want it to end. Now
“Well, it’s not like he’s a child, Batman. And I doubt very much that he’d like you coming round to harass me. So no, I don’t think I will end it.”
It was a long moment of silence that followed, with Batman simply glaring down at the demon. She averted her eyes and finally sighed.
“It’s not like you can really do
anything about it,” she finally murmured.
He grinned. Batman was renowned for his stony demeanor, and even Anya knew that. Her eyes widened as he leaned down to her.
“You’re right. Legally, there’s nothing I can do about it. But in case you haven’t realized this, I have a knack for making criminals’ lives hell
. Wherever you go, Demon, I’ll be there. Whatever wish you try to grant, I’ll stop it before it can even happen. And for everyone that slips past me, I’ll find a way to counteract it. And if you don’t believe me… try me
Anya blinked, and he was gone. She sat there for a moment in silence, staring only at her drapes billowing in the open window. Finally, she stood up, throwing her magazine to floor and letting out a little aggravated growl. She stomped over to her window, shouting and shaking her fist skyward.
! You can have your stupid Nightwing and your stupid city! I’m going back to Sunnydale