an introduction to the new world...
Xander Harris was not a happy camper, what with being kicked out of the gang, losing his girlfriend, best friend, only real guy friend and the respect of the only person he’d found to be a father figure, all in one easy step because of his Presidential style screw up. And he had been first bullied, then kidnapped by psycho zombie, Jack O’Tool. Then add beaten up, pseudo-raped and kicked out of the room and afterward managed to save the world, only to be captured and tortured by the sisterhood as punishment for his involvement with Buffy.
It had been three days of ongoing agony before the gang had burst in like avenging heroes only for the queen she-bitch to cackle madly and throw open a portal before launching the still struggling Xander through it. The last sight he had of his friends had been of them screaming pointlessly before the portal snapped closed and he found himself falling. He was lucky enough to survive the reasonably long fall, but that was primarily due to the vast ocean that spread out as far as the eye could see. This had caused a problem as the chains and clothes he sported had quickly started to drag him under.
Had the remnants of the swim team been even slightly less, Xander’s story would have ended right there as his body went down to feed the ongoing life cycle of the ocean deep. Instead, after a rather frantic thirty seconds of struggling, Xander managed to shed the chains that bound him before kicking off the work boots that were also weighing him down.
Breaching the surface, he took a moment to gasp several deep breaths of air before dropping to his back and simply floating as he calmed his heartbeat and let the situation really sink in. The pain from Xander’s multiple cuts and lacerations were screaming in protest as the saltwater burned deeply within him, thankfully though there was little enough bleeding to attract some of the more unpleasant denizens of the deep, so he ignored their protests as there was little he could do to alleviate the pain at that particular moment.
Reaching a more comfortable heart rate, Xander lifted his head from the water and slowly scanned the horizon for anything that could possibly help him in this situation. As he circled for the fifth time, he felt his heart rate start to pick up again at the distinct lack of anything along the skyline surrounding him, but refusing to panic, Xander forced his heart rate down one more time. Struggling in the water, he managed to sacrifice his pants to construct a crude life vest before pulling his button up shirt off and laying it over his head to resist the force of the sunlight beating down on him as he drifted.
Nine hours later, Xander fought off the intoxicating call of sleep as he drifted to look around once more, he had been scanning the skyline every ten to fifteen minutes in a desperate attempt to find something before going back to just surviving. Once again he was disappointed as he scanned the entire thing and once again found nothing in the endless waters.
“Are you lost, little land walker?”
Xander’s startled screech was cut off as his thrashing slipped him out of the vest he had manufactured and sunk him once more beneath the water. Coming up in a spluttering mess, he shook his head clear before looking around once more and finally giving his full attention to the massive head of the beast only a couple yards away as it floated on the water. Blinking, he made sure his eyes weren’t playing tricks on him before gulping down the urge to scream in terror and flee across the ocean. Xander tried to smile at the massive sea serpent in front of him and said, “Say wha?”
Chuckling in a long low rumbling manner that did little to halt the rampant panic Xander felt coursing through his system, the Serpent started to slowly circle the small human that had shown up in the middle of his territory. “I asked if you were lost little one. You see, you are in my waters, and I would like to know how and why you are here. So let’s play a little game, you explain how you arrived here in ten words or less and I might let you live. While I would expend more energy chewing you than you are worth, I can assure you that I am willing to make that sacrifice to protect my territory from trespassers,” The massive serpent explained as his voice dropped to a considerably more sinister level towards the end of the conversation.
“Zombie, Bomb, Demons, Captured, Torture, Rescue, Portal, Ocean, Dragon, AAAH!” Xander said in a rush as he mentally counted to assure himself of accuracy in covering the important parts of the story.
Chuckling in a slightly higher pitch of amusement, the Serpent finished its first orbit of the young human’s position and started on a second, closer circuit around as he repeated the man’s response and tried to decipher the meaning. While he wasn’t as obsessed with riddles as some of the other dragon species, he did always enjoy a bit of a puzzle at times.
“Hmmm, let’s see, ‘zombie.’ You aren’t one so I can only assume you were facing off against one. Unless of course you are a Necromancer which would explain the lingering scent of death and chaos, but you still possess a sense of humor, so I can only assume that you were facing a Zombie of some sort.”
The serpent smiled at Xander’s pensive nod.
“’Bomb’ would most likely be either what you were using or what you were facing off with the zombie against. You obviously are not a Gnome, so I can only assume that the zombie was some sort of guard for the bomb. That would be a useful trick that I might have to pass on as a distraction, disarm the bomb or have your flesh eaten,” the dragon mused before pushing on.
“’Demons’ seems a bit more complex. While I could see them using a bomb, I could not see them using a zombie when they have so many other resources at hand for their personal use so they were probably just in the area. Perhaps they heard the confrontation with you and the zombie and that is what attracted them to you.”
That almost sounded like a question, but the tone was wrong for that so Xander took no chances and kept his mouth shut.
With a small huff of amusement at the human’s silence, the Serpent continued to muse aloud, not noticing the wave his breath caused that nearly sunk the boy.
“’Captured’ is a bit easier, as is torture. The wounds you sport are a telling testament to the demons’ skill at the infliction of pain. ‘Rescue’ probably meant that either your friends or a wandering group of heroes discovered you and attempted to save you from your fate. The demons are very well versed in the abilities of portals so either they opened it up to stop you or your heroes opened one up to let you escape and botched the entire thing… That is more common than you would think, that. Finally, I can assume the ‘ocean, dragon, Aah!’ part has to do with where you ended up, my arrival and your reaction,” he reasoned before chuckling again. “For the record, little one, I am a Drake. A Sea Drake to be specific and my name is Moem’noun’lous’ser, but you may call me Mum as many humans do.”
After a bit of haggling with the newly introduced Sea Drake, Xander managed to get a ride to the nearest land or boat passing through the Sea Drake’s territory on his word that he would pay double the next time he passed through.
And that found him here, dragging himself up the sloping beach of a small coastal town with no pants, no shirt no shoes and a rather interesting set of smiley faced boxer shorts that were most likely going to get him arrested.
Fortunately it was dark enough that nobody was around allowing Xander to step into the darkened alleys between the buildings without witnesses. Slipping through the dark alleyways and darting past the better lit areas, Xander searched desperately for something to clothe himself with before turning a corner and freezing in shock. Standing there with a smile was one of the locals, dressed in sheer clothing that accentuated her figure while doing little to fight off the chill ocean air. Xander could well guess what her profession was, but prudently kept his mouth shut.
“Usually my customers wait until they pay me before we reach this point,” the woman said with a smirk as she looked Xander over like a piece of meat. “Well, while I appreciate the initiative I must say I don’t see a coin purse anywhere and there are limited areas to conceal it. Should I search?” she teased and laughed at the rather obvious blush from the young man.
Shifting to hide at least one of the reactions he had to the woman’s clothes and words, Xander cleared his throat before he tried to respond. “I-I’m not looking for anything, well I am, bu-. Clothes, I need some clothes! I lost mine in the ocean and I don’t want to get arrested.”
Laughing again, the prostitute decided to take pity on the young man “Well, I just so happen to be skilled at removing clothes, and while most of my clients take their belongings with them before they leave, a couple of young sailors the other day were under the mistaken impression that my husband had come home early and left in a bit of a rush. Sad that, turns out it was just a neighbor needing a bit of salt.” She said as she turned back towards her house to assist.
Letting out a sigh of relief, Xander felt some of the tension drift away at the thought of once again being clothed. “I’ll be in your debt” Xander said and felt some of his dread return as the woman turned to face him again.
“Oh, really? Well I do know one way you can repay me,” she announced before smirking as his blush returned. “Mind out of the gutter, young man. There is job, just a little one I need you to do for me and we can call this even.”
Stuttering slightly at the allegation, Xander forced himself back to the subject at hand. “And what would that be exactly? I hate to say this, but I don’t even know your name yet and I’m a bit cautious about agreeing to things without hearing them about them first.”
“And that is the mark of a wise man. My name is Saeunn and I have a problem with a rather brutish half-Orc named Hroald, who is quiet insane. He recently killed the Watch Commander and declared himself god king of our little island, ruining what little economy we have in a vain attempt to build an army to take more lands for his banner,” Saeunn explained as she opened a door in one of the buildings and stepped inside.
Following her, Xander was happy that his night vision was still solid as it allowed him to view his savior’s room with an experienced eye. The primary room was filled with a massive bed covered in silks and satins that was obviously meant more for intimate pleasure than actual sleep and several sections around the room dedicated to items meant to enhance her customers’ entertainment.
“The majority of the villagers young enough to face Hroald are sailors and won’t be back for six more months. Until that time, he is making life very difficult for those that are still here.” Saeunn said as she searched through a chest and tossed a few pieces of apparel at him before closing the chest and sitting on it, “So will you help me run him off? I don’t need him dead or anything of the sort, just roughed up a bit until he gets it through his skull that we aren’t his servants.”
Slipping the clothes on, Xander felt a hundred times better than he had a minute earlier, “Well while I thank you for the help I’m not an assassin or even a mercenary of any sort,” Xander said and groaned at the lost and abandoned look Saeunn took as his refusal before he caved. “But I can at least look in on the situation and see what I can do to help,” Xander said as he cursed his white knight complex.
Saeunn’s mood did a complete one eighty and the smiling woman was hugging him happily as she explained where he could find the thug that was making life difficult.
Taking his leave, Xander moved through the small town and tried to think up a plan that would keep him from having to fight a crazy half-Orc, of course Xander was feeling a bit strange at the thought that he was possibly about to face an actual ORC in combat, but after the Sea Drake he was willing to be open-minded about the whole situation.
Moving up to one of the few building still alight, he looked up at the hanging shingle and smiled at finding the place. The ‘Serfs Hut’ was a rundown and beaten up old building with few windows and a door that looked to be easily replaced in the event of a rowdy night.
Slipping inside, Xander took care to limit the amount of attention he drew and smiled as nary a head turned in his direction. Moving around the side of the room he carefully took in all the occupants and made a mental note of Hroald as the big man sat on a patchwork throne and rambled loudly to the gathered townsfolk and slamming a rather hefty club onto the ground when he wanted to make a point. After several rather intense minutes of listening, Xander came to the rather obvious conclusion that the ugly man was three months past his sell by date.
Mingling in the crowd, Xander spoke only in whispers and listened in to the random gossip of the townspeople as he got a picture of what the Half-Orc was up to and quickly came to the conclusion that he couldn’t let what he was hearing continue. The would-be god overworked the elders and half starved the youngsters in a bid to build ‘warships’ that, according to the sailing men of the village, would have a hard time crossing a damp section of dirt.
The worst though was Hroald’s plan to ‘build’ his army through forced pregnancy that had the situation nearly spiral out of control before Xander was ready to move. While he had no doubt the old men and women of the town would manage to bring the half-Orc down eventually he was worried about the numbers the madman would take out first.
Slipping a dagger off the table, Xander froze as the innkeeper’s eyes locked onto his before Xander threw a glance towards the half-Orc and raised an eyebrow. At the old man’s nod Xander slipped the blade into his belt and made his way outside.
Hiding in the shadows of the building, Xander waited as the ‘War Council’ broke up and the exhausted townspeople wearily made their way back towards their homes. After a few more minutes of yelling, probably at the innkeeper, Hroald made his way outside and stood outlined in the dim lights of the doorway before he slowly made his way down the street. As he passed the alley Xander had concealed himself in, the Sunnydale teen struck. Moving out of the alley, he gripped the half-Orc around the neck and stabbed the considerably larger being in the back much as he would a vampire back home. The brief gasp of pain from his opponent as he struggled against Xander’s grip was all he managed before he passed on to the afterlife.
Pulling the blade out, Xander let the larger guy slide to the ground and whispered a slight prayer to whoever was listening that he had done the right thing. Rifling through the body’s belongings, Xander pocketed what few coins he found and two small vials of liquid before cleaning the blade on the dead man’s clothes and slipping back into the darkness. Several minutes later, he heard the shout of surprise and joy as one of the townspeople discovered the death of their tormentor.
As they celebrated, Xander hid in a stable and fought down the urge to vomit as he thought about his first kill.
(A/N) Xander is the equivalent of a Lvl 2 Rogue, after all the sneaking, sneak attacks, bluffing, Intimidation, diplomacy and what not, I figured he was either a Rogue or a Bard and I’ve never been very good at playing bards.
This is an actual character being played right now, the actions are what I believe he would do and the rolls are actual chance.
I actually expected Xander to fight a bit more against Hroald but the sneak attack rolled a critical and Hroald missed his Fortitude Check.
P.S. I Don't own BtVS Or D&D