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Good Help is Hard to Find

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Summary: It's just so difficult finding good help these days, especially if you are a Demon Lord.

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Miscellaneous > Surprise Crossover(Current Donor)SamuraiCatFanFR131567031,25925 Oct 1125 Oct 11Yes
Surprise Crossover

This is a response to Challenge 6672 D’Hoffyn’s Demons by mmooch.

DISCLAIMER: I do not own anything related to the Buffyverse (Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy and whoever else has rights in it do), anything to do with Star Trek (which is owned by Gene Roddenberry’s Estate and whichever studio or company owns the rights to Paramount TV stuff), or the other “surprise” verse referenced in this fanfiction, which will be fully disclaimed at the end. I make no money from this nor do I intend to.

D’Hoffryn sighed in exasperation. It was becoming harder and harder to find good help these days. After all, not anyone could be a vengeance demon. One had to have absolutely no regrets about inflicting all kinds of suffering and must have a true understanding of vengeance. Unfortunately, many of those who fell into this category were not suitable because their desire for vengeance was only exceeded by their desire for power. D’Hoffryn simply had no desire to hire anyone who was as interested in superseding him as the ruler of Arashmahaar as they were in acts of vengeance. After all, being THE Demon Lord of Vengeance and Absolute Ruler of Arashmahaar was a job that was already taken; by him.

Thus it was with great regret that D’Hoffryn simply had to pass on that Khan fellow. Anyone who ruled the largest area of their particular Earth would simply not be satisfied with being a mere lieutenant, no matter how good at the vengeance business he was, and how many people who was willing to kill to get that Kirk fellow.

The problem was that quite of the few other candidates weren’t suited to be vengeance demons either. For instance, the Spanish fellow whose career he had followed since childhood. It took a rare dedication to the art of vengeance to swear on your own father’s soul to pursue same until you achieved it. The effort that the now not quite so young man had made to train in the art of swordsmanship, and the sheer obsession with getting his revenge was joyous. Indeed, when the Spaniard finally met and confronted the goal of his vengeance, he thought that he might actually have a chance to recruit the man. Unfortunately, his effort at vengeance was not thwarted and the Spaniard succeeded in killing the six-fingered man. D'Hoffryn was certain that if the Spaniard had failed he would have made a worthy vengeance demon.

It was such a tragic waste of talent. While Inigo Montoya was an expert at vengeance, it was simply clear that once he killed Count Rugen that his desire for vengeance had been sated. Even worse, Montoya simply wasn’t the type who would kill indiscriminately. Of course, there still could be hope for the future. After all, Inigo Montoya was going to take up a career in piracy after all. D’Hoffryn would still have to keep an eye on the Spaniard after all. Who knew, perhaps there would be an opportunity down the road that would make the Spaniard interested in a job.

Once could always dream, even a Demon Lord.

Additional Disclaimer: I do not own The Princess Bride, which was written by William Goldman and turned into an absolutely wonderful film by Rob Reiner and distributed by Fox, MGM and Vestron Pictures, and of which some combination of the aforementioned all own or may own.

The End

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