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Noah Puckerman

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Summary: Puck was born and raised in Lima, Ohio. But it was in Sunnydale, California, he grew up. (Not updated in a while, but I'm working on it!)

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Television > GleePyretofSwedenFR18924,05012112,48116 Nov 1114 Feb 13No

NOTE: This chapter is rated FR13

The Morning After (I Was Almost Killed)

A/N: Betaed by LolaAnn, MissE and RevDorothyL. You guys are amazing!!
Disclaimer: I am not making any money from this fanfiction. Glee belongs to Ryan Murphy and the FOX network. Buffy the Vampire Slayer belongs to Joss Whedon.


Chapter Eight: The Morning After (I was almost killed)


Puck had no idea how he got there, but he woke up in his own bed the next morning. For a second he wondered if it had all been just a terrible dream, but as he shifted he felt the bandage on his neck and he sucked in a deep breath. Because he had kind of hoped that it all been just a nightmare, after all – a very vivid, scary as shit nightmare.

He lay in his bed, just breathing for a few minutes, trying to come to terms with what had happened the night before. He refused to freak out. There was nothing to freak out about. So, he had almost died and a freaky vampire chick had used him as a chew toy; really, no need to freak out. When Willow knocked on his door and told him that breakfast was on the table, he made himself roll out of bed. That’s when he noticed that he was still fully dressed.

“Willow, could you come in here a sec?” He was grateful that it was Saturday and that they didn’t have school, because he had no idea how he was supposed to focus on classes when he knew that vampires were real.

“What’s up, Noah?” Willow asked as she closed the door behind her. Puck stared at her for a long time, wondering how she could act like everything was normal and that the world as he knew it hadn’t come to a terrifying end just a few hours ago.

“Are you ok?” She took a few steps closer and brought him out of the trance he had slipped into.

“Cordelia and I were attacked last night,” Puck said and waited for Willow’s ‘horrified’ face. But she only looked kind of pissed-off and gave him a glare that could easily melt a glacier.

“I know. You shouldn’t have snuck out like that. You’re grounded!”

“Well, I didn’t exactly, really believe that all that vampire crap was real, not really. And I was going crazy being locked up like this! And how was I supposed to know that Cordelia’s ex was a vampire, huh?”

“Darren’s a vampire?” Now Willow looked shocked and kind of sad.

“Not anymore,” Puck grumbled a little, because – hello! A little sympathy for the neck wound would be nice.

“Buffy told me she got one of them,” Willow said and looked down at her shoes, shuffling her feet a little.

“So, are you going to rat me out?” Puck asked, a little worried that he would get into more trouble with his uncle.

“No, but I should!” Willow glared at him again, but Puck smiled at her and gave her a hug – he was only a little surprised when she hugged him back and kind of sniffled a little, like she was trying not to cry.

“Hey, what’s the matter?” he asked softly.

“I was so afraid when Buffy called and said that you had been attacked. You don’t know anything about vampires, and you can’t defend against them.” She stepped back and punched him hard in the arm.

“Ow! What the hell, Willow?”

“That was for scaring me. Don’t do it again.” She jumped a little when Uncle Ira called them from the kitchen a second later, telling them to hurry up or eat cold waffles. As they went down the stairs Willow told him that after breakfast they were going to have a lesson in Vampology and then on Monday she would take him to his first Scooby meeting – whatever the hell that was. He hoped it wasn’t something totally lame like the Crime Club at McKinley. Which sounded cool and totally badass, but all they did was solve fake cases and play Clue on the weekends. There weren’t even any hot babes in that club. The Chess Club had more sex-appeal than those dweebs.

Puck practically inhaled his breakfast, he was eating so fast. While he was shoveling eggs and fake bacon into his mouth like he hadn’t seen food in months, he was kind of wondering what Willow might be able to teach him that wasn’t in that book. He hadn’t had a chance to read it thoroughly, but he thought it might be a good idea to read the parts he skipped. And now that he had firsthand experience, he wouldn’t be so quick in underestimating their speed and strength. Seriously, he knew he wasn’t weak in any way, but he had had no chance against that girl – who was freaking tiny, by the way!

“Noah, you’re going to choke on yolk if you don’t slow down. And you have chores to do after breakfast, so you have no time for being dead.” Ira frowned at him and Puck could tell that he wanted to ask about the white compress on his neck, but wasn’t sure he really wanted to know.

Willow noticed too and she said, “I’m really sorry about before, Noah: if I knew you were shaving I wouldn’t have pounded on the door like that – making you jump and, you know, with the slipping of the razor and then the bleeding, and you know, you have a really filthy mouth on you, mister.” Willow had a serious face during her little monologue, matching her expression perfectly to what she was saying – shamed, apologetic, embarrassed and then just a little bit reprimanding at the end.

Puck looked at her like he’d never seen her before and wondered when his sweet, innocent, kind-of-geeky cousin had learned how to lie. He figured it might have been in the last 18 months or so. Buffy Summers had been good for Willow in a lot of ways, but sometimes Puck just wanted the old Willow back. Suddenly he felt a sharp pain in his shin; Willow had kicked him because he had gotten lost in his thoughts again and taken too long to answer.

“Sure, no problem. No one got killed, right?” He smirked at her and she scowled, because she knew how close he had gotten to being dead for real. Puck went back to shoveling food in his mouth, Willow nibbled on her toast, and Uncle Ira left to get some work done at the office. He would probably be gone all day.

“Are you done?” Willow asked as she started putting dishes in the dishwasher.

“Yeah. You want to hang while I paint the fence? I have to get it done today; it’s gonna rain tomorrow.”

“Sure thing. We can have your Vampology lesson while you paint. You can paint and listen at the same time, right?”


It turns out Willow knew a lot about vampires. Much more than that book had told him. Like the fact that vamps did not look like total freaks all the time; they actually had real faces to hide behind too. Something Puck could probably have figured out for himself, if he’d thought about it for two seconds.

After Willow was done telling him all about vampires she went on to freak him out about demons and shit like that. By the time he had finished the first coat he was pretty much wigged out and was seriously considering hiding under his bed until he got to go back home to Lima.

Probably the worst part about knowing all this was that he wasn’t allowed to talk about it. How people in Sunnydale could possibly not know what was going on in their graveyards he didn’t understand. They were like those monkeys – see no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil, or some shit like that.

He was a little bit angry that not one adult seemed to want to know what was going on. Didn’t they think it was suspicious that a tiny place like Sunnydale had more unsolved murders and mysterious disappearances per capita than cities like New York, Los Angeles, or even frickin’ Vegas? He was astounded by how blind these people were. Willow tried to explain that it was easier for them to look the other way than to accept that there were actual monsters in the world. Puck could see her point, but still thought that the majority of Sunnydale’s population must be on drugs not to notice what was going on.

Willow didn’t hang around for the second coat. She said the gang had something to take care of and that it was pretty important or she would blow it off to spend more time with him. They didn’t really have much time outside of school to hang out, but Puck had a lot to think about so he didn’t mind.

If he was going to be honest with himself, he was kind of grateful that Willow had to leave. He felt a little freaked out and he didn’t want her there if his brain decided that he needed to breakdown for a while. As it was, he was alone for the rest of the day. Uncle Ira came home in time to make dinner, and Aunt Sheila and Willow didn’t show up until pretty late. Puck had already retired to his room by then, nursing a sore shoulder and a stiff neck.


End of Chapter Eight

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