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The Author as a Lesbian - Season 5

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This story is No. 5 in the series "The Author as a Lesbian". You may wish to read the series introduction and the preceeding stories first.

Summary: The Justice System vs the amigas D/J/J, Q/Tom, Sandi/Winner

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Cartoons > Daria(Current Donor)DeacBlueFR181422,5561216,87818 Jan 1210 Feb 12Yes


Disclaimer: All recognizable characters are owned by Glenn Eichler and MTV; no infringement is intended, and no money is being made.

"All right, Mom," Daria said into her phone. " You're going to be getting on Storrow Drive. When you see the exit for Copley Square, take it." They were all a bit tired from the trip, over eight hours long at this point, to move where they were going to stay for at least the next four years. "Now there's a little split to get onto Clarendon, and it's going to do a 90-degree right turn. Follow us." They were just about equidistant from Raft and BFAC, and very close to the downtown club and concert scene. "Yep, another right on Beacon...We're on this street, but we'll be going one street over in a bit, because the parking's in the back."

She grinned and snarked, "I think that's why it's called Back Street." They pulled up to the lights on Fairfield. "A right at this light, and then a left on Back Street." They drove a couple of blocks, and then Daria hit the garage remote control. Four-ten Beacon Street, home sweet home for the next few years." She got out and motioned Helen into one of the open spaces nearby.

Helen got out and stretched. "Daria, did you have to choose a place so far away?" When Daria looked over, her mother was smirking. "It's a wonderful location, dear."

"And it looks even better from the front," Jane chimed in.

"So you bought a condominium in this building?" Jake asked, as Daria unlocked the back door.

"Well, not exactly," Jennifer said, as she brought up the rear of the line.

"We're going to go on the 'garden room' floor, first, to go through the building and see the front," Daria explained as she led the way through an empty floor, to another door, out of the building, and up another set of steps. There were outside steps up to the next floor, but the Morgendorffer clan was craning their necks to see the building that their scion was going to be living in.

Daria stumped up the stairs to the first-floor door, unlocked it, and walked in. When everyone was in, she closed and locked the door, turned around, and said to her family, "Welcome to Casa Burns."

Helen gave her a tight smile. "It's lovely, Daria. But which floor is yours?"

"Um, all of them, Mom."

"All of them! That must have cost you...Daria Morgen-" She broke off when her daughter wagged her finger with a Mona Lisa smile. "Sorry dear, but the civil union ceremony's not for three more weeks, yet, so you're still Daria Morgendorffer, not Daria Lane yet." They had rolled dice to see whose name would be on the marriage, since nobody wanted to sign their names 'X Morgendorffer-Lane-Burns.' It ended up with Jennifer's name on the marriage, and Jane's on the surname. It was fewer letters, anyway. Helen continued. "And Boston real estate isn't cheap. We're talking multiple millions here."

"About nine and a half, with another three and a half spoken for to keep up with taxes." Daria calmly agreed with her mother. "It pretty much taps out the settlement you made with the Westboro Baptist Church, after taxes. There's about two million left." She led the way to the elevator, and when everyone got in, hit the button to the kitchen, while she kept speaking. "However, we did use all of that money for that, and none of our college money, and we have enough to cover food, utilities, and reasonable redecorating for a good, long while." They got out, and walked into a kitchen bigger than the entire ground floor was in Lawndale. Everyone found seats.

"But...that was going to keep you girls covered indefinitely." Helen's mouth was a firm line.

"And it does, now, Mom," said Daria patiently. "The house is paid for. It's up to date and up to code as far as electric, plumbing, appliances, that sort of thing is. "We've got the taxes on it covered. We all plan on being in Boston for the next several years, and if and when we leave, real estate is usually a solid investment. Heck, it's even good as far as you're concerned, because the BSFD is only several blocks away, so Quinn can stay here when she graduates."

"And, Helen," Jane said, "that's without one fact that you seem to be overlooking. All of us are just at the beginning of our careers, where the recognition we have from winning our case before the Supreme Court can only help us. Do you think that a publisher will turn down Daria's first book, when it's obvious that it'll be a best seller, at least among the gay, lesbian, and polyamorous segment of the US?" She shook her head. "That's somewhere around thirty million people. Even if only a quarter of them buy a book, that's seven and a half million. Believe me, that's the definition of a best seller. "You've already seen what happened when Mystic Spiral asked for help for us."

Jennifer spoke up. "And it'll be the same with Jane's work. Remember that reporter from Today? She treated Jane's sketch like it was gold, and that's before a lot of this happened."

"Also, Mom, this place is a lot more secure than somewhere out in the suburbs would be. There's only a few ways in and out, and the walls are thick brick." Daria stood up. "Come on out here." They all stepped outside to see the reflection of the sunset on the Charles River. "You don't think that Jane will get inspired here?"

Although they had had a Wiccan marriage, a "handfasting," all of their parents had felt that, if they could, it would be better to have an "official" wedding, along with their civil union. Daria remembered the wailing and gnashing of teeth when the various religions were told that, no, they could not control who could marry who, except in their own sects; and that, only so long as the individuals concerned stayed in their sects. Millions of gay men and women had lined up to be married, as soon as the decision had been announced; it seemed that the poly groups were waiting on them.

So they had found a sect whose precepts they could all agree on, and who had no problem marrying a clan. Quinn had designed their dresses, and then gone over to the BSFD, both to show them her work and ask for advice. As long as her grades were kept up, she was now assured of a place there, next year. They decided, together, and not without some trepidation on each woman's part, that they would invite a certain amount of press to their home, as they knew that part of what had tipped the scales of justice was the fact that over half of those polled were not opposed to joinings such as theirs, at least in one part or another.

And now here they were, Daria mused, in her sheer green dress on the roof of the building that she and her wives owned. Jane was in her customary red, and Jen in her blue, each holding two half-rings in their hands, and waiting impatiently until the minister told them that they could say the words. Suddenly, he was in front of Daria. "Daria Morgendorffer," he said, "do you consent to take Jane Lane and Jennifer Burns, in the bonds of Holy Matrimony, for better or worse, in sickness and in health, until death parts you?" Daria was shaking so hard that it was a problem getting the words out, but she managed.

"I do."

The minister smiled gently at her, took one of the half-rings from the box in one of her hands, and placed it in her other hand. He then led her over to Jennifer. Beautiful, gorgeous Jennifer, her smile brighter than the sun. "Put the half-ring on her finger and say, "With this ring, I thee wed." Holding his palm under her hand while she put the ring on Jennifer's left ring finger, he smiled when he heard Daria's voice:

"With this ring, I thee wed, baby."

Jennifer's voice was calmer, but her hand was just as shaky: "With this ring, I thee wed."

The minister brought Daria over to Jane. Daria was still shaking, then she looked into Jane's eyes, and immediately calmed down. There was nothing there that would ever betray her, or let her betray herself. They shared smiles, as they shared rings.

"With this ring, I thee wed."

"With this ring, I thee wed."

Finally, Jane and Jennifer turned to each other, each putting their remaining half-ring on the other's finger, so that each young woman now had a ring half made of each of her wives' rings, and they said the words:

"With this ring, I thee wed."

"With this ring, I thee wed."

With that, the minister turned to the family, and the press. "By the power vested in me by the State of Massachusetts and the United States government, I now pronounce you wife, wife, and wife. Ladies, you may kiss the brides!" While they were taking care of this portion of the ceremony, he held up his hands. "Ladies and gentlemen, may I present, Mrs. Daria Lane, Mrs. Jane Lane, and Mrs. Jennifer Lane, the Burns family!"

With that, the families, as well as friends including Tom, Charles, Jodie, and the Spiral, came forward to hug the brides. Helen, Amanda, and Frank were first, but everyone had a hug and a word for the girls. "You done good, girl," Amy whispered into Daria's ear.

""I don't like the thought of losing you, Janey," said Trent, decked out in a tuxedo.

"You won't, you goof. Where do you think a fifth of your band's going to be on her off time?"

"Oh, yeah."

"As long as you're happy, sweetpea." Frank murmured into his daughter's ear.

"I am, Dad. I really am."

Then came all the pictures, not only by the normal wedding photographer, but by the various press agencies. At the end, there was one shot the girls insisted on. Each separated the folds of their right arm, and pressed their forearms together.

The word "Love," was there for all to see.

So there it is, done. A little under seventy chapters/episodes, in just under six months. An average of about two and a half days per episode of around 1500 words. Quite a bit of this was a joy to write, while some of it was just hard slogging. Nobody agreed with me fully on how this was supposed to go, but that's okay. It got to the end, and followed the rules I laid out when I started - that the only substantive change was that of Daria knowing beforehand that she was a lesbian, and having the choices she made feed back into her and other's characters. There were at least two and possibly more items that were written into this fic that could be seen as making additional changes. Those would be the college fair, and the sewing machine. I consider them to be part of any normal universe, and so believe that the rule wasn't broken.

Having said that, how far it deviated from canon was simply insane. When I came to this work, I did not see what a balance point "See Jane Run," was. As a writer, it's both good and bad. For the good side, for almost no effort, you can throw about 90% of canon on its ear. You can wipe out almost all of the faculty and a good 3/4 of the students of Lawndale High, plus, any parents in support roles (like the PTA) with almost no effort. The bad side is that you have to make sure that these hammer-blows are laid down with care, simply because so little can cause so much to happen. If you, as a writer, work around this point, it will pay to look at the entire environment and see what you want to do.

As you can tell, all the strings are not neatly tied up in a bow. There's room to work, and the girls are now at an actual address in an actual city, that will support someone trying to flesh out the story. That just will not be me for a goodly long while. Should you want to expand this fic, drop me a line, and we'll see where your vision is pointing you.


The End

You have reached the end of "The Author as a Lesbian - Season 5". This story is complete.

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