Where a strange life will lead you....
I don't own Buffy and Co, Marvel Comics and Co. or DC Comics and Co. This is a possible conclusion to the Leader series and I place blame on DogbertCarroll's 'Crush' on this one.
Four Freedoms Plaza.....
“Something has to be done.” Reed Richards muttered as he continued furiously scribbling on the dry-erase board in front of him.
It was one of over seventy boards filled equations and schematics for various plans.
Plans for getting rid of one Xander Harris.
Seventeen of those plans would end with the world being overrun by a zombie apocalypse, so those were out. Three of those would have started with Ben opening a Chicken and Waffles franchise of all things.
They just weren't practical.
Especially if the Necronomicon got involved.
It had started with a future version of his daughter Valeria showing up seven months pregnant looking for a break from something she called 'The Harris Compound'. She wouldn't go into details and both Sue and himself had pictured something akin to the grim futures some of the X-Men came from.
He didn't realize that it was a strictly voluntary situation as while being a primal being of lust, Xander still understood what 'no' meant.
A rapist, he was not.
Neither was he a tyrant.
It didn't stop Reed from subconsciously tweaking the equations to reflect that a little when you consider the difference between the current Hulk and the future one known as the Maestro.
Each outcome came to one conclusion... In order to prevent his future daughter from getting knocked up by a Gamma powered baby maker, he had to get rid of him.
The most humane method he could come up with, was making him someone else's problem.
He knew just the Multiverse to send him to.
Way on the other side of the multiversal lattice.....
The Justice Society of America.....
“All I'm saying is that you need to get a man. You're not getting any younger you know.” Wild Cat said to Power Girl before sipping his coffee.
“How did we get from this morning's crossword puzzle to my lack of a love life? Again?” Power Girl sighed. “You're worse than what my parents would be if they were still alive.”
Wild Cat shrugged. “It is the responsibility of my generation to pass on our wisdom. You've got child bearing hips. Use them.”
“If you weren't human I would squish you.” Power Girl said with a bit of red in her glare.
“Mmm Hmm.” Wild Cat said as he shook his newspaper a little bit.
“It's not like I can take a wild three day sex bender with the next person that comes into the room or anything.” Power Girl said. “I'd put anyone normal into traction in the first five minutes and that isn't counting if it was good.”
“So you say.” Wild Cat said as he mostly ignored the rant and the slight breeze that was circulating through the room. Mister Terrific did say he was going to tweak the air conditioning after all.
“Even then, I'm Argosian. My people didn't exactly have a good fertility rate in the first place. When you add in the complications of having an overcharged immune system due to my superpowers and the general genetic incompatibility between myself and most of the life forms in this universe I may never have children.” Power Girl ranted. “It's not like I haven't thought about it. Still it's not like the perfect solution for my personal life and problems is just going to drop in on us.”
There was a flash as the small wind going through the room became a powerful gust of wind as an ominous portal opened in the ceiling of the meeting hall. An Eight foot tall emerald green man fell and crashed into the table causing it to buckle under his weight.
Wild Cat looked at the shirtless green guy on the table and up at the portal. “It's not like large breasted cat themed women are going to drop in us.” He called out with feverish hope.
A white haired woman wearing a leather bodysuit with visible claws landed on top of the green man.
“Score!” Wild Cat said as he raised his cup of coffee in a salute to the mysterious portal as it closed.
“Maybe later.” Black Cat sighed as she nuzzled into Xander Harris' chest. “Sleep now.”
“Problem solved.” Wild Cat said with a grin. “It's the squeaky wheel that gets the grease.”
“Even as a metaphor, in this instance that is pretty disgusting.” Power Girl said with a shake of her head.
“And you say we haven't corrupted you. You dirty minded girl.” Wild Cat chortled. “Let's call Mr. T. in here and see what we have.”
“You know he hates being called that.” Power Girl sighed.
“So did his predecessor.” Wild Cat grinned. “That never stopped me.”
“Base scans show an incredibly dense musculature and a moderate gamma radiation signature. Aside from the obvious, I can't really tell you much else without getting a DNA sample, something that is a little difficult considering I can't even get a skin sample at the moment.”
Wild Cat looked like he was about to say something when Power Girl interrupted him.
“Don't.” She said. “Just don't.”
“Fair enough. You could always use your fingernails to get a little blood if you don't want to go the other route.” Wild Cat shrugged.
“Are you sure you're not a stereotypical grandparent?” Mister Terrific asked Wild Cat.
“Nah.” Black Cat said. “I'm not that old.”
“Liar.” Power Girl snorted.
The Med Bay....
“You know when I said I'd show you a wild night, I didn't mean this.” Black Cat said to Xander as they sat on their adjacent Medical beds.
“This is probably somehow my fault.” Xander shrugged., the minor displacement of his body weight causing the bed to groan underneath him. “My Danger sense has been going off ever since Reed Richards bumped into me this morning. He was muttering something about Chicken and Waffles not working.”
“All right, that is pretty weird. Even for him.” Black Cat admitted. “Where do you think we are?”
“My guess, somewhere very far away from anyone Reed considers 'family'.” Xander said with a shrug.
“Is this about that future version of his daughter showing up pregnant with your grandson?” Black Cat asked
“I don't think she told them who the father was.” Xander said as he scratched his head. “Edgar is only a few months old right now.”
“What's it like having a Thundercat for a son anyways?” Felica asked.
“Hey, none of us know where that sword came from.” Xander said defensively. “Even Tigra's people haven't heard of it before.”
“But it looks like the Sword of Omens.” Black Cat said. “Even if it started as a joke, that thing has a mind of its own now.”
“Yeah well. Weird crap happens.” Xander said as he looked around. “Alternate Earth?”
“Maybe.” Black Cat said as a well endowed blond woman came into the medical bay. “Though some things don't change.”
“Hhmmm.” Xander grunted as he stared at the newcomer. They'd taken his special pants away from him before he'd woken up.
“Whatever you do, never jump rope in front of him.” Black Cat cautioned. “What's left of his mind will leave”
“What's his problem?” Power Girl asked before she realized the behemoth was staring directly at the hole in her uniform. “Nevermind.”
“Hypnotic Cleavage.” Black Cat said. “It's not the first time this has happened.”
“Does he do most of his thinking with his genitals?” Power Girl asked.
“Only when people take away his supercooled pants away from him.” Black Cat said. “He needs a semi-permanent case of Deep Green Balls do get anything done.”
“That sounds pretty horrible.” Power Girl said after some thought. “I'll go get him his pants.”
“Just walk backwards.” Black Cat suggested. “He's kind of an Ass Man.”
“I need to make better wishes.” Power Girl muttered as she gently floated out of the room.
"No you don't!" Wild Cat called from down the hall.