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Summary: In honor of Dogbertcarroll's 'Flickering Lights', a bunch of mostly Xander centered one-shots.

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Multiple Crossings > GeneralCrazyDanFR187074,13440986607,74016 Feb 1230 Oct 14No

Oops part Deux....

Hercules and associated characters are Greek and roman myths that were reinterpreted by Christian Williams into Hercules: The Legendary Journeys which had the Magic 'Rami Touch' added to it. Buffy the Vampire Slayer was created by Joss Whedon. This is a work of fan-fiction so sit back and enjoy the odd ride.

Part two.....

Kevin Sorbo sighed as he turned off the TV with his remote. He'd heard that Strife had returned but he didn't believe it at first. Now though.... now was a different story.

As with most things involving Strife, it started small. He was, among other things the God of Skirmishes.

In the beginning it was a slow rise in Football Hooliganism. First it was in Argentina and then it spread worldwide like a plague. No one had been killed yet, but there was widespread property damage as well as some fairly serious injuries of those involved.

Then came the Holiday shopping season.

That was when he definitely knew that Strife was back. Why else would there be trampling incidents over trivial children's toys that had been on the market for months? For it being on sale for five bucks less? Where was the sense in that?

This all meant that Strife was back. He was back and gaining power. The question was... when was he going to show up? After the recent Earthquake in LA he'd already faked having an aneurysm in his shoulder. It put him on light duty show wise for the next few years so he wouldn't draw suspicion to himself.

The producers had all laughed when he first spun the idea that he really was Hercules and then they ran with it. Well they did until certain things starting making more sense. Hence the faked injury.

It didn't matter much to him if the show continued on much longer or not. His name was back out there and his power base was secure as long as his legend lived on. There was already a Disney film with his name on it that had netted a quarter of a billion dollars. On the short scale of course.

Not too shabby.

Still... Strife was back and he had to be ready.

He actually wished Iolaus was here. The man had a way of egging him on to stay in peak form. Now he just had to find time to train away from the wife and kids. The Bowflex could only do so much for a half-god after all.

Kevin sighed. Things were going so well too. There was talk of a new pilot in the works based off of one of Roddenberry's old works. It wasn't Star Trek but it was something. Work was always good. It kept him busy and out of trouble.

He'd had enough trouble for several lifetimes.

There was a hard knock on his front door.

“Hey Herc! You home?!” A voice he hadn't heard before shouted. “I just want to say hello! Well that and I'll swallow your soul!” The voice called before cackling maniacally.

“Dammit Ted.” Kevin sighed. “Those Evil Dead movies of yours have gotten everywhere.” He muttered before walking towards the front door and looking through the peephole.

It was either a nutbag with a leather fetish or the new Strife.

“Stupid cell towers messing with my sixth sense.” Kevin muttered. “If you are who I think you are, you know my home and family are off limits!” Kevin called through the door.

“I got the lowdown when I Ascended.” Strife said as he rolled his eyes. “You and me, Chavez Ravine. Midnight.”

“I'll be there.” Kevin said. “You've had your say. Now leave.”

“You betcha!” Strife grinned before his form dissolving into ash as he teleported away.

Kevin sighed. He'd better get his wife and kids out of town before dark.

Just in case the new Strife didn't play by Zeus' rules.

Repeating a line that was often said in both movies and reality, Kevin said. “I've got a bad feeling about this.”


“I can't believe you're actually going through with this.” Ares grinned at his 'nephew'.

“Hey, what better way to announce myself to the world than fisticuffs with earth's mightiest immortal?” Strife grinned. “Do you have what I asked for?”

“I do. Though it took a while for Hephaestus to forge it. He had to stop laughing first.” Ares laughed as he handed Strife the item in question.

Strife just grinned and set the item in it's proper place. “As long as it works, even once.. it'll be worth it.”

Eris sighed before adjusting her son's leather straps. “Don't go too crazy out there.”

“I won't.” Strife promised. “Let's go do this thing. Everyone invited?”

“Hades had to let a couple out on special passes from his realm but yeah. It'll be a full house.” Ares said. “You didn't use to be this... showboaty.”

“Hey, it's the twentieth century.” Strife shrugged. “Go big or go home.”

“What happened to my simpering little nephew?” Ares said with a shake of his head.

“He got himself killed. Then he got better.” Strife grinned ferally. “Now come on, I've been fighting with and inside of Soccer Hooligans for months now. I'm ready for this.”

“He has lived up to his office in a spectacular manner.” Eris said with a nod.

“Okay.” Ares said as he rubbed his hands together. “Now does anyone have to use the bathroom before we leave?”

Eris and Strife looked at each other before looking at Ares.

“Fine. We're off then.” Ares smirked before teleporting them all in a ball of fire.

Chavez Ravine aka Dodger Stadium.....

“What on Earth?” Hercules said as he walked onto the field. The stadium lights were on and the entire field was full of... everyone he'd ever met.

“Oh no. Falafel is doing the food.” Hercules said as he looked around. He knew more than half of these people had been reincarnated at least once. How were they here and in their original bodies?

“You like?” Strife asked as he did a little circle with his arms held out to the audience. “Took some doing but I've been flush with power and favors since I came back.”

“You weren't kidding about that whole 'swallow your soul' thing were you?” Hercules asked the reborn god.

“Hades lost a card game and he owed me a solid.” Strife shrugged. “You ready?”

“I guess.” Hercules said. “How do we start this?”

“In this corner!” A voice announced. “The immortal Hercules!”

“Is that Salmoneus?” Hercules asked with a grin.

“Yep.” Strife nodded. “I got everybody. I had to sit through what felt like an eternity of clip shows but I know just about everyone you've ever met.”

“In the other corner, the recently Reascended God of Skirmishes, Mischief and Mayhem!” Salmoneus announced.

The entire stadium booed.

“Let the fight begin!” Salmoneus called from the announcer's box.

“You heard him.” Strife said before reaching out with as much speed as he could muster to attack Hercules.

“And Strife starts with a double titty twister!” Salmoneus said with an audible wince in his tone. “The God of Mischief is not holding back tonight!”

Hercules grunted before backhanding Strife across the length of the stadium. This was just the warm up.

It took about ten minutes of the dirtiest and trash mouthiest fighting most of the people there had ever seen before Hercules finally snapped and kicked Strife square in the crotch.

There was a sharp clanging noise and Strife just smirked as Hercules hopped around on one foot.

“What was that?” Hercules asked as he finally stopped hopping around.

“I had Hephaestus forge me the perfect protective cup.” Strife said with a grin.

“So... all of this was just to get me to kick you in the balls?” Hercules asked.

“Pretty much.” Strife nodded.

“It really is you.” Hercules muttered.

“Beyond a shadow of a doubt.” Eris grinned.

“Unbelievable.” Hercules said.

“Come on.” Strife said. “Everyone's here and they're waiting to see you.”

“How long do we have?” Hercules asked.

“Dawn.” Strife told him. “It was the best I could manage.”

“Well... as long as I don't eat any food I'll be fine.” Hercules grinned.

“Hey.” Falafel said from where he was serving hot dogs. “I was way ahead of my time.”

“And the food is still terrible.” Hercules called back.

“He's not wrong.” Strife shrugged.

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