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Summary: In honor of Dogbertcarroll's 'Flickering Lights', a bunch of mostly Xander centered one-shots.

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Multiple Crossings > GeneralCrazyDanFR187074,13440986607,96716 Feb 1230 Oct 14No

College, now with lower learning...

AN: Damn you Dan Harmon. I just binge-watched all 5 seasons of Community. Oh well. Yo Jobra.

The Reformed Watcher's Council...

“I didn't know you had money.” Dawn Summers said as she glanced at the letter Xander was reading over his shoulder.

“I don't talk about it, but Anya left me her share of a business that she'd invested in.” Xander said with a sigh.

“Why don't you talk about it?” Dawn asked.

“Look at who the check is from.” Xander said as he handed it to her.

“ABC Dildos?” Dawn laughed. “What she invested in a manufacturing company?”

“More of a shop though they do outsource for a patented shape.” Xander said with another sigh.

“You don't mean...” Dawn trailed off.

“Yup. I'm their 'biggest' seller. Technically.” He said. “There are about seven shops overall and two in Colorado.”

“What's this really about?” Dawn asked him.

“I'm thinking about taking an extended vacation.” Xander told her. “Let's face it, I'm burning out.”

“Well... you did make Andrew wet himself. Again.” Dawn agreed. “You could use a break.”

“Yeah.” Xander said. “You know, my folks went to school in the same city where two of these shops are located.”

“Where is that?” Dawn asked.

“A place called Greendale.” Xander said with a shrug. “Dad got his certificate for Air Conditioning repair and my mom majored in flower arranging. They used to say it was a strange but great place.”

“Greendale. They moved from one 'dale to another?” Dawn asked.

“There and back again for my dad.” Xander shrugged. “So... Yeah. I'm gonna check out the stores there and probably the school. I need a break.”

“I could use some distance from my sister and her 'escapades'.” Dawn admitted. “I really don't like the downward spiral that is her dating life.”

“Monkey see, monkey don't.” Xander said. “Just because we don't like who or what she's dating right now doesn't mean you have to follow in her footsteps.”

“So.. how much money do you have?” Dawn asked.

“Considering I technically own the building one of the shops is in, enough to finally get a degree or two.” Xander said with a nod in her direction. “Though this does not count as us running away together.”

“We'll just be sharing space over a sex shop.” Dawn said with a grin. “So... how do we enroll?”

“To the internet!” Xander said before pulling out his smart-phone.

Two months later.....

“This is a terrible neighborhood.” Dawn told Xander as they got the last of their stuff inside their three bedroom apartment.

“We'll survive. It's not like we ever go around unarmed.” Xander shrugged. “Besides, I've got the patch.”

“That is a deterrent.” Dawn agreed. “So.. handguns, stun or just the usual short swords?”

“Whatever is comfortable for you, though we do need to get registered for some weapons in this state.” Xander told her.

“Gotcha. So.. what are we doing about wheels?” Dawn asked.

“My uncle Rory relocated nearby. He has a van I can get for cheap, but it's got carpeting and a waterbed.” Xander told her.

“Wait... your uncle is getting you a 'shaggin' wagon'?” Dawn laughed.

“He promised he'd get that part painted over.” Xander grinned. “You know what that means.”

“Don't tell Buffy.” Dawn nodded.

Both of them paused as they heard the outdoor loudspeaker announce that the Dildopolis shop under them was having a 'quickie' sale where their biggest seller was half off.

“Earplugs are a must.” Xander said. “The rent here is ridiculously cheap, even if I own the building.”

“Yeah.” Dawn said. “I'll be... right back. I have to go... do something.”

“Sure.” Xander said from where he had begun assembling a bookcase, letting Dawn slip out mostly unnoticed.

Outside the hall a few minutes later....

“Hi, are you a new neighbor?” A perky brunette that was around Dawn's age asked as Dawn came back upstairs from her 'errand'.”

“Woah!” Dawn said as she dropped her paper bag holding her purchase. The impact caused said purchase to switch on as it vibrated itself out of its packaging.

“Okay...” The girl said as she took a step back from the... thing on the ground.

“Sorry. Batteries were included I guess.” Dawn said as she tried to scoop up her purchase only for it to slip out of her fingers and fall to the ground again. It began to inch closer and closer to her new neighbor.

“Is everything okay out here?” Xander asked as he poked his head out their apartment door.

“Eyepatch!” Their neighbor shouted at him.

“I have some spares if you need one.” Xander said with a nod before noticing the... item on the floor. “I'm going to ignore any conversation and actions that are taking place for the next few minutes. I don't care who that belongs to or why it looks like it's following our neighbor.” Xander told Dawn before closing their apartment door again.

“I'm not touching that.” The neighbor told Dawn with a severe look of distaste on her face. She quickly stepped to one side, only for the object to seemingly turn on it's own to follow her again.

“I think it likes you.” Dawn grinned as she finally got her hands on it and switching it off.

“I don't... I only live here because it's cheap.” the neighbor said.

“Same.” Dawn agreed as she put her purchase back in the paper bag it came in. “Though there was a sale and... well... I don't know what dating is going to be like here. I'm Dawn.”

“Annie.” the girl introduced her self. “You're new around here? I'm from Denver originally. I just moved here for school.”

“Me too. I'm enrolled at Greendale Community College.” Dawn said. “So's my friend Xander.”

“The scary guy with the eyepatch?” Annie asked, “Sorry. He just creeped me out a little.”

“The patch is unsettling, he's got some bad scarring underneath so he can't do the glass eye thing.” Dawn said with a shrug. “You get used to it.”

“I guess.” Annie said. “So what classes are you hoping to take?”

“Well... whatever I can get a first. I'm planning on transferring to a better school after my two years here are over.” Dawn admitted.

“Me too!” Annie agreed. “Maybe we can take some classes together!”

“Sure. We could carpool too if our schedules synch up.” Dawn agreed. “Wait.. you're not evil are you?”

“No.” Annie said. “Why?”

“Just checking.” Dawn told her with a grin.

Elsewhere in Greendale...

“Dammit.” Jeff Winger sighed as he sat in his apartment, contemplating how his life had turned to shit lately. He'd started the process of enrolling at Greendale so he could work towards getting an actual Bachelor's degree but he'd already worked damn hard to get where he was without that damn degree. There had to be a way around it.

There was a knock on his door.

Jeff sighed and set down his scotch. “This had better be important!” He said through the door.

He opened the door and was surprised at the beautiful woman wearing a tailored suit with a scarf around her neck.

“Are you Jeff Winger?” The woman asked.

“Yeah? Mysti didn't send you did she? I'm not exactly in a celebratory mood these days.” Jeff asked her.

“No. My name is Lilah Morgan. I'm a representative from Wolfram and Hart. We've heard about your little... trouble and have an offer for you.” She said with a predatory grin.

“I'm listening.” Jeff smirked as he gestured for her to enter his apartment.

Riverside Colorado....

Abed Nadir looked up from the falafel he was making as he looked around. “Something has changed.” he said to himself.

“Abed, have you finished packing?” His father asked him.

“I'm ready to go Dad.” Abed said.

“Good. We leave in the morning. Early. I have to be back in time for lunch.” His father told him.

“Cool. Cool cool cool.” Abed said with a nod.

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