Good Eats and Friends. What more could you want?
“Dude, I am not part dragon.” Xander protested.
“I just saw you breathe fire!” Jonathan sputtered. “You have to be part dragon. It's the only thing that makes sense.”
“That or I ate some mystically enhanced jalapenos.” Xander countered with a grin. “I take it you haven't been to this buffet before? They have a pretty awesome salad bar.”
“That was a salad bar?” Jonathan asked. “Then what were those gagged screaming things in there?”
“Mandrakes. A really feisty root vegetable.” Xander told him. “I learned about this place from my pen pal.”
“You have a pen pal?” Jonathan asked. “When did that happen?”
“Sophomore year. He lives in New Jersey but knows all the weird places to eat. All I know is, the more often I eat here, the less I get injured.”
“So that's your secret.” Jonathan said. “I've wondered how you've managed to take the hits I've seen you take.”
“I owe it all to clean living and a 'healthy' diet.” Xander told him. “Come on, let me show you what they like to call 'pudding' here.”
“What kind of place call's itself 'Frump's Fried Foods' anyways?” Jonathan asked.
“Dunno.” Xander shrugged. “Still, it's better than the food we had in high school.”
“I guess. So does everything here wriggle all the way down?” Jonathan wondered.
“Nah. Just the good stuff.” Xander told him. “I've got another twenty before I have to head back to the site, so I need to finish up. How are things on campus?”
“Not great.” Jonathan admitted. “How is being a townie?”
“Oh you know. Lots of awful looks from most of the campus girls until they get drunk. Then I'm suddenly 'okay'.” Xander shrugged. “I had a girlfriend for a while but she got a job as some sort of middle-person for a demonic equivalent of Whole Foods and skipped town.”
“That sucks.” Jonathan said. “I haven't had much luck in the whole dating thing.”
“Well... have you tried dating outside your species? Not all demons want to eat people.” Xander asked. “That or you could kidnap Amy from Willow and Buffy's dorm and try to turn her back into a human.”
“Amy?” Jonathan asked.
“Amy Madison.” Xander said .” Remember her? She turned herself into a rat and got stuck a while back. Something about the goddess Hecate or something.” Xander shrugged.
“I've got to go.” Jonathan said. “I just remembered something I need to do at the college library.”
Xander just shook his head and wished his short friend luck. He was going to need it.
Much like he as was going to need since his boss had given him the responsibility of dealing with the renovations of the Echidna house on campus. The girls there had a reputation of being a bunch of man-eaters but so far they were just a little grabby.
He didn't mind grabby. Even if a few of them had some odd skin conditions. They were nice girls who were all just a little too lonely being away from home.
Not that he minded. The pay bump he'd gotten from this was enough to move out of his parents basement and into a slightly larger apartment.
Xander nodded to the old woman who was the manager before tipping nicely at the table and leaving. He had work to get to and rooms to reinforce and soundproof.
Sunnydale Syndrome... even when you know it's there, it's still working. The fact that none of the girls in the Echidna house wore bras probably helped.
Whistling a jaunty rendition of 'Luck Be a Lady', Xander Harris strolled out of the restaurant and headed back to work.
Brief flashbacks of the sorority house scene from 'Love Potion Number 9' along with slight Addams Family References and mentions of the Mother of all Monsters. I figured Kathy couldn't be the only demon girl on campus. Think Love Hina but with demons. Hell, the Mitsune character could really be the Teumessian fox.
Or Carmen Sandiego could. But that's a story for another writer and time.