I do not own BTVS. I also don't own Star Wars.
(As I understand it, Lucas sold it to Disney... Weirdness.)
I know it's been more than a month since I've posted anything. I do apologize for that. I don't want to post anything to SP&OotP (on FFN&AO3) until I'm sure I'm back up to par. As it is, this was written while sitting waiting during my mother's last chemo appointment.
Xahn'dyr Harhys eyed the various creatures running around him with no small amount of disdain. It was one thing to use the Dark Side. They, however, were letting it consume them and rule their decisions. Even a rogue Jedi was smarter than that.
As a Sith Inquisitor, Xahn'dyr considered himself much smarter than a rogue Jedi. He, at least, had the sense to see that emotion could never truly be separated from the mind. Controlled and directed, but never separated. Well, unless you mutilated your brain.
That was a bit drastic... even for the Jedi.
He glanced around. Primitive dwellings and even more primitive vehicles littered the terrain. There was less greenery than Alderaan, but far more than Tattooine. The stench of fossil fuels hung in the air. The smell was almost enough to overwhelm the sense of the Dark Side that radiated from somewhere nearby. Almost.
He took a deep breath, feeling it fill him to bursting. He could probably keep his more aggressive abilities running for hours just from the ambient power...
A specter ran up to him and he eyed its attire in appreciation. At least one person around here knew how to dress. Though, he was under the impression that Force Ghosts were supposed to be blue. The universe never stopped coming up with new variations, he supposed. "Xander!"
He quirked an eyebrow. Her accent was odd, but the ghost knew his name? How did everyone in the galaxy know his name? He was fairly certain that there wasn't an Empire-wide broadcast. And, why did he keep seeing her sitting in a library when he looked at her? "You are?"
"Um... Willow." She blinked at him. "I dressed up as a ghost and... now I am one. You dressed up as some Star Wars character and now... Oh." She deflated. "You don't remember because you're your character, aren't you?"
He sighed and absently used the Force to push away a strange, small alien that had decided to try to attack them. The alien decided that it didn't want to tangle with him and hurried off. "All right. I'm going to assume that you're not joking. So, either you're mad or the galaxy is even stranger than I thought."
She opened her mouth to speak, but he cut her off. "Considering some of the things I've seen, I'm willing to take your assertion on faith. For now. For your sake, I hope that faith is not unjustified."
She started to reply, but was – once again – cut off. This time by a scream. "Oh my god! Buffy!"
The ghost ran off and Xahn'dyr sighed. He could leave this 'Willow' to her own devices, but the Force was nudging him in that direction. Besides, Sith or not, he'd never been able to resist a damsel in distress. He followed her.
Of course, he arrived just in time to see a strange brunette proclaim that an oncoming vehicle was a demon. Another image skittered through his mind scape: a table, piled high with sharpened bits of wood and... food? He ignored it and started to correct her, only for several small aliens to come running towards them. His lightsaber ignited with a snap-hiss, only for the ghost to try to grab him. "No! They're children!"
He rolled his eyes and Force pushed them away. "Fine. However, if you don't want me to kill them, then we need to get somewhere that I won't be overwhelmed by sheer numbers."
"Buffy's place. It should be safe."
The insane brunette tried to flee, proclaiming him a warlock. He rather easily snagged and levitated her behind him with the Force as he walked. "Inquisitor with a specialization as a Sorcerer, actually. At least, that's what they called it on Korriban. I've no clue what you call it on this planet."
They fled to the house and shared a round of conversation that vexed him no end. Especially when the brunette – Buffy, he now knew – called him feeble. Add in the complaints from 'Cordelia' – the other brunette – and he was very close to the edge. It took all he had to keep from slamming them into a wall or shocking them into oblivion.
He finally only managed to restrain himself because he was too busy pondering the blank spot in the Force that called itself 'Angel.' He didn't look like any of the angels that Xahn'dyr was familiar with, that's for sure. For starters, they were attractive. This guy was anything but, even ignoring his own preference for women.
And his lack of Force presence was... creepy.
Of course, nothing ever goes right in the life of Xahn'dyr Harhys. Therefore, someone – something – had to break in through the back. And, Buffy had to flee. And, of course, everyone wanted to go save her. Wasn't she supposed to be this great warrior? That's what the ghost seemed to think.
Still, he tagged along. He didn't have much else to do and the Force was still insisting that he stick close to them. Their path eventually took them into an abandoned warehouse. His companions started stacking things against the doors. He just rolled his eyes and levitated several larger pieces of machinery into the pile. He knew that the barriers wouldn't stop the aliens for long, but it seemed to make them happy.
Of course, he was right. The barriers fell and they were soon bombarded by the tiny aliens. Xahn'dyr had had enough. His blade ignited and he joined the fray. A blonde male with the same lack of Force presence as Angel stayed well back and muttered something that sounded distinctly like, "Bloody hell! A lightsaber!"
The male fled and left his minions to be slaughtered. Xahn'dyr just sighed. He was probably going for reinforcements. He glanced at his companions from the corner of his eye. Angel was tossing the aliens around, but otherwise not harming them. Cordelia was putting her abilities with a staff to decent use. Buffy... was cowering off to the side.
Yeah. Great warrior.
He ignored the shriek from Buffy as he decapitated another small alien. These things were worse than krilliks. They were everywhere and just seemed to keep coming. He tossed his lightsaber, using the Force to control it as it flew through the air and sliced through a dozen or so that were sneaking up on Cordelia. He ignored her gasped thanks as he summoned his blade to him. Quick as thought, he was back to swinging it around like a just-graduated Juggernaut.
He gave a sigh. If his Master found out about this, he was going to never live it down. The most 'Light' Sith in the Empire running around killing indiscriminately. Yeah.Listen to your instincts, they said. They won't lead you astray, they said. More like they'll lead you into a load of trouble and then drown you in hydrocarbons before setting off a thermal detonator,
he griped inwardly. He tossed his aggravation into his next round of Force Lightning.
A small alien shrieked as the attack impacted. He was rather pleased to see the attack arc to a second and then a third. This place was incredible for his powers. He absently wondered if there was some artifact that was causing this. Perhaps something from the time of Tulak Hord? Or another remnant of Revan's experiments?
And then the Force went sideways, diagonal, upside down and backwards.
Xander Harris came back to reality with a jerk, only to find himself staring at dozens of maimed and dead children. If he'd been paying attention, he might have been disappointed to realize that none of his friends even noticed when he fled. Disappointed, but not surprised. He was just the Zeppo, after all.
The Morning After
Buffy, Giles and Willow looked at each other and then looked at him. He was standing in the shadows, wearing his costume from the night before. The hood was pulled low over his face, and the lightsaber was clipped to his belt. Buffy wondered, with no small amount of trepidation, why all her hair felt like it was standing on end.
"Problem?" Giles' voice was mildly curious.
Xander lifted the lightsaber and ignited it... without moving his hands. "Problem."
Willow eeped and jumped backwards, but Xander just rolled his eyes and shut off the weapon. He paused, getting a quick mental flash of a pretty blonde in hippie clothes, but shook it off. "Relax, Willow. You're my best friend. If I'm going to kill anyone it'll be Cordelia."
She looked at the teasing grin on his face and smiled. He was just kidding. Right? "Okay. Can I watch?"
"Sure." He turned back to Giles. "I need to get as far away from the Hellmouth as possible."
In a Galaxy far, far away...
Xahn'dyr rolled to his feet and groaned. That was probably the strangest dream he'd ever had. He walked out of his quarters and onto the main hall of his Fury-class ship. 2V-R8 twitched frantically at his approach. "I'm sorry, Master. I was unable to acquire the 'Twinkies'... Please don't deactivate me!"
Xahn'dyr blinked. He rubbed a hand over his eyes. "Andronikus!"
"Yeah?" The scoundrel's voice called back to him from the bridge.
"We at Nar Shaddaa yet?"
"Wake me when we get there." He called back, before turning on his heel and heading back to his quarters. Maybe if he went back to bed the galaxy would make sense again the next time he woke up.