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This story is No. 6 in the series "Adventures of A Line Hopper". You may wish to read the series introduction and the preceeding stories first.

Summary: Buffy discovers her secret jealousy of the TARDIS.

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Dr. Who/Torchwood > Buffy-Centered > Pairing: The DoctorShoshiFR15911,53962511,49924 Feb 122 Mar 12Yes

Chapter Two

Buffy had find Warm Fuzzy.

He hummed in mind. Felt nice. Like sun on cold winter day, like happy thoughts that break through tears. Buffy feel. In mind. Bright. Happy. Shining. He was Warm Fuzzy. Buffy liked Warm Fuzzy.

But Buffy liked Warm Fuzzy close. Why he so far away? Why he always far away? Buffy wanted Warm Fuzzy. Why he always run away from her? Warm Fuzzy afraid? No. Warm Fuzzy never afraid bad things. Warm Fuzzy afraid Buffy? Warm Fuzzy no like Buffy? Buffy want Warm Fuzzy like Buffy. Why everyone think Buffy bad? Buffy no want be bad.

Buffy sad. Need Warm Fuzzy. Warm Fuzzy make Buffy happy. So Buffy search across campus.


Buffy stopped. It was not Warm Fuzzy. No. In trees. There. She saw.

Blue Box.

Blue Box that take Warm Fuzzy away. Blue Box that keep Warm Fuzzy from Buffy. Blue Box bad. Blue Box sang pretty to Warm Fuzzy. Blue Box sang too pretty to Warm Fuzzy. Blue Box thought Warm Fuzzy hers. Warm Fuzzy Buffy's. Not Blue Box's. Buffy mad.

Buffy gave Blue Box angry stare. Growled. Hissed at Blue Box. Blue Box not flinch. Blue Box not scared Buffy. Buffy teach Blue Box. Buffy make sure Blue Box learn lesson. Buffy charged at Blue Box. Scratched at outside. Hit. Kick. Tried to bite Blue Box. Buffy attack until tired. But Blue Box not hurt. Blue Box not damaged.

Blue Box evil.

Only evil things not hurt when Buffy hit them. Buffy knew. Blue Box evil. Blue Box must die. Buffy got sticks. Pointy sticks. Blue Box not human, Blue Box able to think, Blue Box not harmed by hitting. Unhuman thinking strong things become dust with pointy sticks. Unhuman thinking strong things always become dust with pointy sticks. Buffy charge at Blue Box with pointy stick.

Stick break. Blue Box still there.

Buffy try again. Blue Box still there. Why Blue Box not dust? Blue Box supposed to be dead. Blue Box should be dead. Why Blue Box not dead yet? Buffy kick Blue Box again, claw at Blue Box again.

"Combined hordes of Genghis Khan couldn't get through that door," said a voice behind her. "Although, admittedly, they didn't try to use wooden stakes."

Buffy stopped. Turned. Warm Fuzzy. Warm Fuzzy here. Warm Fuzzy close. Close enough to touch. Close enough to hold. Close enough for good feeling in head. But not close enough for Buffy.

Buffy pounced.

Warm Fuzzy cried out. Buffy not care. Buffy tackled Warm Fuzzy to ground. Curled up around him. Buffy happy. Buffy liked Warm Fuzzy. Warm Fuzzy nice. Buffy put ear against his chest. Two hearts. Pretty rhythm. Buffy breathed. Breathed air. No. Breathed him.

Buffy frowned. Never noticed how nice it was hold Warm Fuzzy. Never noticed Warm Fuzzy smell like moonlight. Never noticed how own heart beat faster around Warm Fuzzy. Never noticed how head felt when this close. Felt good. Felt very good. Buffy wanted more. Now.

"Want," she said.

Warm Fuzzy stared. "Yes, I can see that," he said. "Tell you what, why don't I give you the key, and you can get inside the Tardis yourself? I've got a very nice medical infirmary in there that I'd love to introduce you to."

Buffy looked up. Blue Box! He not want Buffy. He want Blue Box. Why he not want Buffy? Why Blue Box better than Buffy? Blue Box not pretty. Blue Box not squishy. Blue Box not true to Warm Fuzzy. Blue Box flew for anyone. Blue Box a whore.

"No Blue Box!" whined Buffy, raising head off chest. "Blue Box bad."


"Blue Box bad," Buffy explained.

"Well, granted, there are always certain dangers that accompany time travel, but the old girl and I have been through a lot together. I think we can handle it."

"No!" said Buffy. Buffy grab Warm Fuzzy jacket. Shake him. Stare into eyes. Must make understand. Important make understand. "Blue Box not human. Blue Box bad."

Warm Fuzzy blinked. "Well, if you look at it that way, I suppose it has a certain logic to it. But then, I'm not exactly human myself—"

Buffy frustrated. "You good!" shouted Buffy. "Blue Box bad!"

"Elizabeth, listen, you're clearly not feeling yourself," said Warm Fuzzy, coaxing Buffy hands off jacket. "I need to understand what's been done so I can reverse the damage. The equipment in the Tardis should be enough to make a full diagnosis. If you won't come inside, I can bring the equipment out here. Would that make you more comfortable?"

Buffy threw arms around Warm Fuzzy. "No go in Blue Box!" she cried. "Blue Box take you away."

"Oh," said Warm Fuzzy. "Oh."

"No leave."

"I… I promise I won't leave," said Warm Fuzzy. "Tell you what? I'll bring you into the Tardis, and you'll make sure I don't leave. How about that?"

Buffy shake head. Bury head in chest. "Blue Box make you leave. Blue Box bad."

"Well, I suppose you might look at it that way," said Warm Fuzzy. "Although, technically, I'm the one making her leave. But I won't leave, this time. Promise."

"Always leave," said Buffy. "Always leave Buffy. Not want Buffy. Want Blue Box."

Warm Fuzzy hearts beat faster. Warm Fuzzy laugh. "Elizabeth, are you jealous of my ship?"

"Want stay," said Buffy. Squeezed as tight as could. "No leave."

"Not leaving," said Warm Fuzzy. "Certainly not leaving. Not trying to get into the Tardis to leave. Just run a diagnosis. Establish whether this condition of yours is viral, psychic, or the product of some external substance. And, um, not to put too fine a point on it, but I will need to breathe again, at some point in the near future. Respiratory bypass only does so much."

Buffy loosened arms. Warm Fuzzy breathed. Buffy breathed. She liked breathing Warm Fuzzy. Wanted to breathe more Warm Fuzzy.

"Thank you," said Warm Fuzzy.

"No Blue Box," insisted Buffy.

"Right," said Warm Fuzzy. "Yes. Course not. Better go for plan B, then."

Buffy feel Warm Fuzzy move. Then hear buzzing sound by ear. Buffy swatted buzz. Bugs buzzed. Buffy no like bugs.

"Yes, sorry about the noise," said Warm Fuzzy. "Just scanning for psychic interferences. Neurological impairments, psychic pattern arrays, that sort of thing."

Buffy hear buzz again. Buzz loud. Buzz make teeth rattle. Buzzy bug make Buffy angry. Buffy no like buzzy bug. Buffy grabbed buzzy bug, threw away. Buzz sound stopped. Buffy win. Beat back bug. Buffy grinned at Warm Fuzzy. "Bug bad," she said.

Warm Fuzzy sighed. "Well, it's not a psychic field," he said. "Although I suppose there isn't really any point in continuing the examination, now that you've thrown away the sonic. Listen, Elizabeth, you do understand me, right?"

Buffy nodded.

"And you do know that I'm here to help?"

Buffy nodded.

"In which case, Elizabeth, I would like it very much if you would do something for me. Just an itty bitty little favor. Do you think you could do that?"

Buffy nodded.

"Would you please let me stand up?"
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