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Saving You Saves Me

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Summary: A very concerned Willow goes looking for a recently resouled Spike after she notices that he goes missing. Set early season seven, but is AU. Rating is just in case

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
BtVS/AtS Non-Crossover > Romance > Spike/WillowRivanWarrioressFR15614,125033,15024 Apr 1224 Apr 12Yes

Chapter One

DISCLAIMER: I do not own the characters, locations, events, etc, of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. That Honor goes to Joss Whedon. I'm only having a play.

A.N. This takes place after Spike has regained his soul and after Willow tried to end the world.

Willow slowly walked through the graveyard, her right hand tightly gripping a stake and her left hand holding a cross. Her backpack was slung over her shoulders as she cautiously glanced around. Buffy would kill her if she knew what Willow was doing. It had been hard enough for Willow to get a night to herself, saying that she was returning to her parents’ house for the weekend to allow Buffy and Dawn to have a sisters-only weekend. It had taken all of Willow’s persuasive skills and excessive use of her ‘resolve face’ to get Buffy to finally cave into Willow’s request. Now, Willow was alone in a graveyard, using the bright moonlight to see and praying under her breath to the Goddess that there were no vampires out that night.

Well, that wasn’t true; she was looking for a vampire, but only one particular vampire that Willow had not seen in quite a while. She had seen Spike since his return from Africa and had seen the devastating effect his shiny, brand-new soul was having on the master vampire. She’d instantly felt sorry for him but Buffy had brushed past the shadow that was Spike, ignoring him and ordering Willow to follow her. Willow didn’t understand why she followed Buffy that night, why she had ignored the vampire that was so desperately in need but she had, assuming that she would see him at the next Scooby meeting they had. When he didn’t turn up and nothing was mentioned about his absence, Willow began to worry. That had been a week and a half ago and Willow was beginning to panic. She’d asked Buffy if she had seen any sign of the blond vampire but Buffy had shaken her head and had told Willow to chill; the bleached-blond pain in the ass would be able to look after himself. Unconvinced, Willow had arranged the weekend by herself and now, certain that Buffy had already done her patrol for the night, had set out, searching for Spike. The most logical place for Willow to look was Willy’s, so she walked to the demon bar. She was shocked by the amount of fear her arrival at the bar generated from the demons that frequented the seedy bar. She strode purposefully across the room to the bar and sat in a stool, ignoring the curious and slightly nervous looks that were directed her way.

“What can I do you for, Red?” Willy asked.

“Just information tonight, thanks,” Willow replied, keeping her voice pleasant, but at the same time hard. She wanted to seem polite, but still dangerous.

“Yeah, information about what? You and your Slayer friends always seem on top of things.”

“Well, we aren’t on top of this,” Willow said, though in her mind she couldn’t help but add, in reference to the newly souled vampire, ‘though I wish I was on top of him. Bad Willow, BAD WILLOW!’

“And what is this thing that you aren’t on top of?” Willy leaned forward and Willow fought the urge to lean back to get away from the man’s stench.

“I’m looking for Spike. Is he still in town and, if he is, where is he?”

“You’re looking for Spike?” Willy asked. Willow rolled her eyes, rapidly losing her patience.

“Yes, Spike. You know, William the Bloody. About this tall, blond hair, blue eyes, pale skin, likes to drink blood, and allergic to sunlight.”

“I haven’t seen him in over a week. He came in a couple of times and got absolutely wasted. Something was really bugging him. Then, he stopped coming. Is he feeding of humans again or something?”

“Why do you ask?”

“Because, Red, he hasn’t been buying any blood of me, so he’s got to be hunting again.”

Willow froze. Why would a souled vampire not be buying any blood?

“Is there anywhere else he could be getting blood from?”

“No, he hasn’t been visiting the hospitals because my boys have got them all handled and I haven’t noticed a drop in the stray animal numbers. There isn’t anywhere else he can buy enough blood without looking suspicious, like at a butcher’s.”

“Do you know where he is staying?”

“Someone was keeping his old crypt from being taken over. I guess he’d be staying there.”

Willow nodded, scanning Willy’s face for any signs that he was lying. She couldn’t see any and she couldn’t sense that he had told her lies by reading the aura that he was sending out, so she guessed he would be telling her the truth.

“If I find out you are lying to me, you will be very sorry. I’m very powerful, you know,” she said, just to make sure he knew she was serious. Willy nodded and Willow tossed a couple of dollar bills onto the bar before sliding from the stool and stalking out of the bar.

“Oh, and take a bath. You stink,” she threw over her shoulder before letting the door close behind her. She hurried down the sidewalk, clutching the stake once more as she drew near to the cemetery that Spike’s crypt was in. She kept to the moonlit areas of the cemetery as she drew closer to the crypt, knowing that the shadows were where the vampires would lurk. She could not sense any vampires being nearby, though, and was silently grateful that she had waited until she knew that Buffy had finished her patrol. Just after Buffy patrolled was the safest time to be out and about in Sunnydale at night.

Willow exhaled in relief as she reached Spike’s crypt. She raised her hand and, after throwing a glance over her shoulder, knocked on the door. She stood waiting, listening for the sound of cursing, groans, and staggering footsteps, but they never came. Willow frowned and knocked again.

“Please be here, Spike,” she whispered to herself. She shifted on her feet slightly as the crypt door remained firmly shut. She glanced around again, making sure that the graveyard was deserted, both of the living and of the undead. She couldn’t sense anything, so she returned her focus to the door. She studied the lock and directed her power towards it. It glowed for a moment before clicking open. Willow smiled. She had resolved to only use magic in the case of emergency and she knew that this counted.

Willow turned the handle of the crypt door and pushed the heavy door open before sliding through the gap and letting it close behind her. The crypt was dark with no light penetrating the gloom. Willow pulled a flashlight from her bag and clicked it on, slowly moving the beam of light across the room. The top level of the crypt was deserted, a thin layer of dust covering the floor. Willow chewed on her lip nervously. The room was messy, bottles of alcohol littering the floor and a few splatters of what looked worryingly like blood staining the wall. Willow clambered down the ladder to the lower level and shone her flashlight across the room. She froze when the flashlight’s beam crossed over something. She panned the light back over it. Spike was lying on his bed, eyes closed.

“Spike!” Willow called, rushing to his side. Even by his standards, Spike looked pale and Willow shuddered when her fingers gently touched his cheek, feeling how icy cold he was.

“Come on, Spike. Wake up. Please wake up,” she begged, touching his blonde hair. Her heart began to pound in her chest. Was Spike gone? Had he somehow retained his body when his un life had ended? Willow felt her eyes fill with tears but didn’t understand why she was crying. She hadn’t even been exceptionally close to the vampire, thought he had comforted her when Oz had left, in his own unique way. He had always seemed to be so observant of her feelings and when she asked him about it, he had simply stated it was because she was his favorite Scooby. Even when she’d been addicted to magic, he had maintained a steady support of her, even though he had at the time been sleeping with Buffy. With a start, Willow realized what had happened.

“Oh Goddess, I’m in love with Spike,” she whispered into the darkness of the crypt. She burst into tears, leaning over Spike’s motionless body. Willow sobbed. Why did everyone she loved have to die? First Tara, now Spike (although, technically, he was already dead). Willow leaned back, sitting on the edge of Spike’s bed and looking over the vampire. A sudden thought occurred to her. She couldn’t go to Giles or Buffy or Xander; they all had shown that, in their opinion, Spike was not worth their time and that he was better off being dusted but there was someone who Willow knew might be able to help. Unfortunately, she didn’t have his number with her. She looked closely at Spike. There was no way she was going to leave him alone in his current condition, so he was going to have to go with her back to her house. Willow decided that her bedroom would be the easiest to block the sunlight and her parents weren’t due home for another month.

Muttering a spell under her breath to make Spike feel weightless, Willow looped one of arms behind Spike’s back and heaved him upright. Somehow, Willow wasn’t sure how but she managed to get them both upright. She glanced at the ladder and cringed.

“You just have to make my life difficult, don’t you?” she muttered to Spike, who gave no indication he had heard her. Willow sighed, cringing as she felt how much Spike’s ribs protruded from his pale skin.

“When did you last eat, Spike?” Willow asked him. Spike, once again remained silent. Willow frowned, not used to any form of silence from Spike. She half-carried and half-dragged Spike across the room to the bottom of the ladder before groaning. She quietly muttered another spell, causing Spike to begin to levitate up the ladder. Willow followed closely behind Spike’s levitating corpse and when she reached the top of the ladder, released the spell, catching Spike’s body before it hit the ground. Willow then began the long process of getting Spike all the way from his crypt to her house. She couldn’t help but thank the Goddess that, of the Scoobies, she lived the closest to Spike’s crypt. It was still a fair distance but at least she wasn’t taking him a far as Giles’s house or the Summers’ residence. That would be too much, even after casting the spell to make Spike lighter.

Willow already felt weary by the time she reached the end of her street. She hadn’t done magic since, well, since she’d gone bad and tried to kill everyone and she had obviously gotten out of practice. She felt weak and drained and Willow knew that she would probably pass out soon.

“Almost there,” she groaned, pulling Spike along. Finally, she reached her front door and was fumbling in her bag for her key in her bag. Spike was slumped on her porch beside her. Willow threw a look down at him as she unlocked and opened her front door before crouching down and picking him up again.

“Oh, and if this isn’t obvious enough, I’m inviting you inside, Spike,” she hissed, dragging him across the threshold. She dragged him up the stairs and carefully lay him on her bed before collapsing beside him. Groaning from the effort, Willow took the weightlessness spell off Spike and immediately felt a little stronger. She looked across at Spike and slowly reached out a hand, gently touching his pale, cold cheek.

“Come on, Spike. Please wake up. Snap out of it,” Willow whispered. There was no response. Increasingly desperate, Willow gritted her teeth and slapped Spike across his cheeks. She whimpered as her hand stung from the contact but Spike continued to lay still. Willow burst into tears.

“Please don’t hate me for this,” she whispered to Spike as she slid off the bed and went to her desk. She pulled open her top drawer and began to shuffle through it. She found the small business card she had been looking for and went back to her bed, sitting beside Spike. She picked up the phone from her bedside table and slowly dialed the number from the card.

“Angel Investigations, we help the helpless.”
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