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Xander and Yet ANOTHER Demon

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This story is No. 1 in the series "Xander and the New 'Verse". You may wish to read the series introduction first.

Summary: Three years after the fall of Sunnydale, Xander Harris is in a bar, and something that isn’t human just walked in. It has to be a demon, right? Even if this is Colorado Springs…

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Stargate > Xander-CenteredDianeCastleFR133460,6152011397480,60712 May 1217 Jul 12Yes

Xander and the Fruity Beverages

A/N: See chapter 1 for disclaimer, spoilers, notes on AU, and why Xander has his eye back.

Anise pushed the remains of the pina colada at him. She demanded, “Here, Xander. This one is too sweet. You will finish it, and then we will try the tequila sunrise.”

Oh crud. Well, he’d already gotten two double scotches and three-fourths of a pina colada down her. He could take this one for the team. “Sure thing, Anise.” He scooted his coke to the side and had some of the pina colada.

“I still do not understand why the wooden umbrella is supposed to be an important part of the recipe.”

Xander shrugged. “I think it’s supposed to be part of the ambiance. It’s a tropical beach kind of drink, with the pineapple juice and the coconut juice. So the beach umbrella is supposed to go with the whole sunny beach concept.”

Anise frowned in thought. “I do not see how that would improve the taste of the drink. But your explanation makes more sense. I did not realize that the Tau’ri used these umbrellas for anything except protection from precipitation.”

Denise came back and asked, “And how are we doing?”

Anise said, “I believe we are doing acceptably. Could you please bring us… one more tequila sunrise, one screaming orgasm, one sex on the beach, and one fuzzy navel? And please put a little wooden umbrella in each one. Oh, and another double scotch. That was extremely tasty.”

Denise managed not to stare at Anise like there were horns growing out the sides of her head, and instead plastered a fake smile on her face. “I’ll get right on that.”

Xander gave Denise a slight smile and said, “Thank you.” He figured that if all those drinks didn’t get Anise drunk enough to tell everything she knew, then it was going to be hopeless. He was pretty sure he couldn’t talk Anise into drinking a gallon of Everclear, no matter how many cute little wooden umbrellas he put in it.

He finished off the pina colada and waited until Anise was most of the way through her tequila sunrise. Then he asked, “So, how long you been in Colorado Springs?”

She said, “Only since I left the base and rode down here. How long have you been around here?”

He suddenly wondered if she was supposed to be loose. What if heavily armed military types were going to be showing up soon, looking for her? Did they even know she was wandering around civilians without a leash? What would they do to said civilians when they found them around Anise? He had a good idea what Maggie Walsh would have done, and that really made him worried. He thought that over while he explained, “Oh, I’ve been here for almost two weeks. A friend of mine needed a house re-built, so I hired some local construction guys, flew in, and went to work on the place. We just finished today. I figured I’d help them move in tomorrow, and then fly back to Cleveland. What about you?”

Anise started talking about her work in biological research, even if a lot of it sounded more like archaeology to him. She said she was only here to test out a new device, and then take it back to her lab for further work. Weird. Xander had no idea demons ever had research labs. As far as he knew, the closest demons ever came to doing research was when Spike had spent a couple weeks digging up Sunnydale looking for the Gem of Amara. Not that he was going to say that in front of Anise. Boy, this tequila sunrise was better than he expected. He finished it and watched Anise kill most of that ‘screaming orgasm’.

“Do you know why it’s called a screaming orgasm?” he asked, knowing damn well she had no idea.

“No Xander, I have no idea at all,” she slurred slightly. She rested her elbow on the edge of the table and nearly fell over when it slid off.

He grinned, “Because it’s supposed to be funny when you ask the waitress to give you a screaming orgasm.”

“Oh!” She suddenly grinned mischievously. She handed him the remains of the drink and asked, “Xander, would you like me to give you a screaming orgasm?”

“Why sure,” he laughed. They chortled together as Xander finished off the screaming orgasm and Anise drank three-quarters of the ‘sex on the beach’.

She handed him what was left of the drink and leered, “Here you go. I think I should give you another screaming orgasm, don’t you think?”

They laughed some more, while she killed the fuzzy navel and lasciviously sucked the last drop of liquid off the umbrella. Xander sort of noticed that every one of the glasses was empty. And he definitely noticed that she was plastered. When he tried to stand up and his legs didn’t work right, he figured out that he was at least as plastered as she was.

He paid Denise, and left her a huge tip. Then Anise led him out of the restaurant. She walked him around the corner, so they weren’t under one of the streetlights. He figured this was the place where the fangs and tentacles came out.

She looked up at him and leaned into him. She opened his coat and pressed herself against his chest. “Xander? There’s something I neglected to… to tell you.” She hiccupped slightly.

“Yeah?” he cleverly answered. He was all set for her to go demon on him, and then he was gonna get the drop on her and she was gonna be in so much trouble…

She ducked her head a moment. He watched as her eyes flared white for a moment, like little flashbulbs were going off somewhere inside her head that Willow would know what it was called and would say something really smart about.

She said in a much more gentle voice, “Please, call me Freya. Just for tonight, call me Freya.” And then she kissed him.

Which had to be the oldest trick in the book. Or the second oldest trick in the book. Or something that his brain couldn’t figure out, because she was a really incredible kisser, and it had been a while since he had been with anyone, even if she was a hideous demon from a demon dimension that evil Air Force officer women were letting loose on earth and were gonna cause the apocalypse of all apocalypses because they were so stupid.

“Xander, you do not mind that you are of the Tau’ri and I am not?”

“No Freya, I don’t.”

“Good. Kiss me again, please?”
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