At 0815 hours on April 15, SG-1 stumbled tiredly into Conference Room 1 and sat. They had just finished post-mission physicals, and didn't have much in the way of patience as they just wanted sleep.
"General, can you tell me what's going on?" Jack asked tersely.
"SG-1 is getting a new member."
That woke everyone up.
"Your new member was informed yesterday, so she should be arriving soon."
Just then, the door opened and a young girl in her early twenties flew in. "Sorrysorrysorry! IsleptinandthenIcouldn'tfigureoutwheretheroomwasandthenImadewrongturnafterwrongturnafterwrongturn..." Finally, she stopped when she saw who was in the room.
Her jaw dropped.
And she fainted.
Nobody moved for a few seconds.
"Well, that was fast." Jack deadpanned.
The door opened and an airman stuck his head in. "Oh, hi. Um, I saw Rain blaze in here, and I saw the look on her face, so I figured that it might be a good idea to check on her." He looked down at the floor and his accent suddenly changed to very British. "BLOODY HELL!!" He looked back up at them. "What the 'ell did you do to 'er?!" Suddenly, he adopted a pose and look that, in Sam's opinion, would've looked good in tweed, maybe even authoritative.
Not to mention cute. And that train of thought was immediately squashed because it was not a place she wanted to go, especially considering a few rumors she'd heard about the guy.
He dropped to one knee and examined her. He listened to her breathing, but didn't get any further as he noticed a small drop of blood next to her nose and tasted it, oddly enough.
He sighed and stood, seemingly undergoing a transformation as he relaxed. "Sorry to worry you sirs, I get a little, overreactive sometimes. She's just passed out, though I've never seen her passed out quite like this." He turned and went through the still open door, only to return seconds later with a question clear on his face. He stood there for a few seconds before it came out. "Um, if you don't mind me asking, exactly what in Sam Hill did you do to her?"
"Nothing." was the general consensus, but the man was suspicious of the General's grinning eyes.
"Hunh." He gave them one last suspicious glare and left, returning with a bucket of water that he promptly dumped onto the young woman's face.
With that, she went from passed out on the floor to bolt upright in a flash, shouting "Brine!" at the top of her lungs.
It took her a moment to realize that she was in company, but not a very long one, and she blushed as she slowly got up and slid, embarrassed, into a chair. She probably figured that they needed an explanation because she started explaining it away to fill the silence. "Sometimes people say the weirdest things. When I was 5 I knew someone who spouted off the F word every time she had a weird dream. Those were the only times she ever said it, and she always shared them with me. Well, except for that one time, and she gave me the overview, which had me forgiving her for keeping it secret." She was blushing when she finished.
Sam could not help herself. "What was it?"
The young woman and the airman, who still had the bucket in his hands, gave her a funny look that she didn't quite recognize and said, in unison, "You don't want to know."
'Kinda spooky.' The astrophysicist thought to herself.
Then the girl looked at him and said, "Don't you have somewhere to be?"
"Hmm? Oh, right. I was supposed to get my friend some Twinkies for the members of his blood bank, and then a few snacks for his resident HSTs." He was mumbling basically to himself as he ended.
And before anyone could ask questions, he was off to whatever chores he had to do topside.
"What's an HST?" the ever-curious Daniel Jackson asked.
She looked at him with a slightly calculating look in her eyes. "Mmm, I think you're a bright young man. You can figure it out. And if you can't, then you don't have the need to be told." She turned to General Hammond, seated at the head of the table. "So, I'm gonna get straight to the point. Is this my new team? 'Cause you know I don't like practical jokes like this, and I'm pretty sure I don't need to tell you what happened to the last person who did one like this."
This garnered two responses at the same time.
The General replied amusedly, "Yes, Captain, this is your new team." and a smile.
Jack gave his two cents worth in a slightly disturbed tone of voice, "You tortured him?"
The woman being questioned smiled and chuckled. He was probably thinking of things that completely violate the Geneva Convention.
"In a way, just not how you're thinking." Not that those things aren't useful or anything, but she decided to set the record straight before things got out of hand. After all, the truth was waay better than any horrible thing they could come up with at the Geneva Convention. "Mostly I just gave him to some terrorists who were looking for him specifically, though they were a little vague on who it was until they could see him and verify, and left him in their capable hands. I gave them a few instructions that basically told them to add a few unorthodox torture methods and routines in addition to whatever they planned for him. Namely, stuff like strapping him down and forcing him to sit through the stupidest movies filled with things that were very offensive to his manly bachelorical pride, like 'Hello Kitty' or 'My Little Pony'."
The entire population of SG-1 laughed at that. Well, Teal'C just messed with his face a little, but that was basically the equivalent of his laughter.
'After all,' Sam thought. 'No "manly" self-respecting bachelor would be caught dead watching that sort of stuff, especially without younger females in the same room.' And she knew from personal experience that many of the men with what is referred to as 'manly pride' tend to be really big jerks or worse.
"So, what happened to him?" Daniel asked.
"Not sure, but that's the best part. I don't have to lie about knowing or not knowing exactly what happened to him because nothing can be proven, but I can guess. You see, a friend of mine was working for me inside the terrorist cell as a mole and he followed the guy after he broke out. The man rampaged through the ranks, decimating anyone that stood in his way, and then died when he left the complex. My friend had been around the corner at the time, so he didn't see it happen, but practically nothing was left of him when he got there."
Then a realization hit the woman hard, as if it was completely obvious and something that she should have seen hours ago, and she blushed, embarrassed. "I just realized, you guys don't know who I am. I'm Captain Lorraine McCarthy, and I have supposedly been nominated for several prestigious medals, if for no other reason than that I am alive in the first place. And, quite frankly, I'm blown away by the fact that I'll get a chance to work with you."
"So," She turned to Hammond. "What happens next?"
"What happens next is all of you, and I do mean all
of you, go find beds and sleep
." He smiled, thinking of his own overactive hyper kids when they wouldn't go to sleep. "Next week, however, SG-1 will be going to PL-X233 to see if Earth can establish solid diplomatic ties, as well as an alliance of some kind. Dismissed."
Suddenly, the exhaustion that had been plaguing them before the meeting returned and they were more than happy to comply.
But for some unknown reason, something held Sam back. While her friends left for beds and cots in various places and buildings, she stayed back to listen to whatever happened behind the door.
"Thank you sir. This means a lot to me."
"You're welcome. Now. I think it's time that you rest."
"Rest?" She asked blankly.
"Yes, rest. You deserve it, and you don't have any pressing matters at the moment."
There was a slight pause that Sam took as the girl giving him a weird look. "I have a feeling that that isn't all of it."
"Well, I also have a medical mandate on my desk from Janet ordering you to sleep because you didn't fall asleep in the ICU the whole week, and
had visitors the entire time."
"I caught a little!" came the weak protest.
"It also says that if you don't sleep for at least 8 hours, then she'll reschedule your cancer tests to a week from now."
"Right." There was silence for a few very long seconds. "Well, hehe, I guess I'd better get going then."
Realizing that the conversation was done, she left for her room. She didn't get a single moment of sleep that night.
A/N: By the way, I consult my family for literary advice, and, as it turns out, Hammond had grandkids. You can't have grandkids without first having kids.
Though, I would like you guys to look over what I have as peer reviewers as well as readers and suggest where I went wrong or where I could do better, as well as where I could go next. And also suggest chapter names. I don't always have them.