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A Badass Summer

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This story is No. 3 in the series "A Badass Family". You may wish to read the series introduction and the preceeding stories first.

Summary: A story where a team of superheroes learn to bond. A man of iron loses his heart to a certain queen slayer if he can survive Uncles’ Phil and Clint. Whilst getting over his shock about Captain America and the Dark Slayer.

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Marvel Universe > AvengershellbellsFR15712,857106226,91219 Jun 1221 Dec 12Yes

Organised Chaos

Disclaimer Don’t own it; don’t make any money as all rights belong to the owners of Buffy, R.E.D and the Avengers!

Premise: The bigger sequel to Badass Family, which I highly recommend you read. In this story Phil Coulson is the son of Victoria Winslow and Ivan Simanov. The characters are from a movie called R.E.D for those unfamiliar Victoria played by Helen Mirren is an ex Mi6/CIA wetwork specialist. Ivan played by Brian Cox is her long lost love who happens to be a KGB/FSB agent she had been ordered to kill. The other important part to note is that Buffy is his niece.

Warnings This story will contain female and male slash alongside hetero pairings.

-----------------------Organised Chaos or Avengers land in London----------------------------------------

The keeper of keys at the London Council House had received a communique from the Queen about getting guest rooms prepared. She also requested that a witch from the Devon Coven contact her at their earliest convenience.

To add to her woe the Director was in town. She really hoped she could have a holiday soon. She didn’t care how big the heroes were; they damaged the townhouse she so lovingly kept in order then she would hand them their ass.

Director Giles walked through the door.

“Good evening Nora is everything okay?”

Nora smiled wearily, “Young Miss Buffy is coming home finally.”

Giles could hear the warning tone; he’d quickly learnt to listen to Nora, it stopped many breakages.

“Oh dear lord what now? To be frank as long as it is not an apocalypse I’m inclined to forgive.”

Nora did not look particularly amused, “Sir she is bringing the Avengers home as house guests.”

Giles sighed but was aware of Buffy’s familial connection, “I’m afraid that she is related to one of them.”

Nora nodded, “I know Sir. Buffy said and I quote, “Uncle Phil needs a healer as he thought it a great idea to take on a God.”

Dear god he thought, it really did run in the family, but he was surprised because he would have expected Clint to be hurt. “I see, well you know how Buffy is about family. The only thing I ask is you put Buffy and Tony far apart.”

Nora was intrigued as to why Lord Giles wanted to keep the billionaire and his eldest apart, “May I ask why?”

“The pair met at a party, in time I believe they will get past the hair pulling and probably date.”

Nora finally understood the root of Lord Giles discomfort, “You cannot stop her dating and at least the man will be human.”

Giles looked miserable, “I know but until they get past the hair pulling I’d rather they not destroy the house.”

Nora now did not look impressed, “Anyone of them harm any part of this house I’ll sic a witch on them.”

Giles chuckled, “Once everyone is settled could you make sure Buffy pops into the study please.”

“Certainly Lord Giles.”



Buffy knew that she was doing the right thing. If anything, the plane journey home was telling her how much it was needed. She loved her grandmother dearly; she thinks she’ll forever treasure the look on most of the Avengers faces. Ironic really, Aliens who are intent on destroying New York are no problem but they were freaked seeing her 70 year-old grandmother clean her nails using a wickedly sharp knife.

Tony blinked, “That is a big knife don’t you all think?”

Natasha smirked and suddenly a beautifully carved Japanese Sai appeared. Buffy snickered, “Willow does give good presents.”

Tony could have sworn that Natasha was pouting. Clint, who had not let go of his husband’s hand, snickered, “Its scythe envy.”

Buffy rolled her eyes, “I dealt with the psycho preacher and pulled the scythe from the stone so it’s only fair.” She finished primly.

Clint who was slowly coming back to his old self because Buffy refused to let him mope, “Hey no need to go all lady like!”

Buffy smirked in triumph, “when Uncle Phil’s recovered you’re going to help me train the girls.”

The team watched fascinated as the strong archer paled at that comment. Natasha didn’t bother to hide her enjoyment, “Will there be popcorn?”

Buffy was grinning, “Oh yeah, you best record it.”

Natasha smiled, “What else are big sisters for?”

All felt that such a seemingly innocent question should not sound like a threat.



Tony was very confused but then again Buffy had confounded him for a long time. Their first meeting had been at a Washington party, a few years ago, the party had bored him incredibly until she had turned up. She was such a beautiful tiny woman yet every soldier treated her like she was dangerous. It was such a strange dichotomy as to fascinate him. Of course, Tony being Tony decided he would learn the most if he was antagonistic. It was then that he found the tiny blonde spitfire could match him quip for quip and he was delighted.

He must admit that he had been a tiny bit in love with her. However, he had been with Pepper at the time. Pepper was always going to be a good friend but both had realised that they could not be lovers. Pepper had told him that she simply couldn’t handle seeing him hurt. It had stung but he would recover; he always did.

He was unsure whether he was willing to tempt the wrath of Coulson by attempting to date his niece. Not to mention the fact that her Grandmother was probably the scariest person he’d ever met. Personally, Tony felt that this was impressive considering he’d taken on giant metal-transformer-wannabe robots and hugged a nuclear weapon in the last week.

Buffy seeing his discomfort decided to lighten the mood, “relax the scythe is for fighting bad-guys, I don’t use it as a tin opener.” Her face showed clearly that she was teasing.

It was not his finest moment, staring, jaw dropped in shock, “that is wrong on every level”

Buffy snorted but turned to talk with Steve. She mainly wanted to warn him about what he would see when they got back to the townhouse. Mainly, she wanted to warn him about Faith, who would definitely make a play for him. Buffy thought about it because she wasn’t dead but Steve just made her think of a hotter Riley, which was just sad.

Steve smiled, all boyish charm and Buffy knew that he was about to get mobbed by a group of supernatural-powered young girls, “I may be Captain America but I’m not dead.”

Buffy actually cackled, causing all to look at her but she didn't explain. She had a feeling that Steve knew exactly how to use his image to suit his own purpose and she looked forward to him shocking his team.



The plane landed and everything was in place to see her guests back to the residence. She was just relieved to see the medical help there for her Uncle along with Xander and Willow. Their friendship was being repaired it started when they realised that they could no longer put Buffy upon a pedestal. Shock of all shocks Stark managed to show some restraint by not commenting on Xander's one eye.

Tony was whining, “Why can’t we stay at my apartment in Chelsea?”

Buffy looked at him with a quelling glare that was even better than he Uncle Phil’s. “I’m calling in a marker so my uncle can be healed quickly. I’m running a company and have no time to pander to your ego besides I’ve seen Stark Tower. Why not see what a classy buildings look like?”

The two teams watched fascinated by the sparks that they saw. The Scooby’s, Xander and Willow, who’d accompanied the other Council workers were delighted. Stark may be an ass but he was a human ass, which made him more than appropriate candidate in Xander's book.

Still, Iron-man was a little bit of his idol so he decided to intercede and decided to distract his friend, “Buffster you’re channelling G-man.”

Victoria swept out of the plane with the regal grace of a Queen returning home, “Nonsense Alexander she is merely speaking the language how it should be spoken. Now come escort me to this marvellous abode. It’s been too long since I’ve been in England.”

Xander threw a panicked look back at the Queen slayer, who was grinning unrepentantly. He mouthed; H-E-L-P, Victoria was smiling now as she patted his arm, “Don’t worry Alexander I’m just looking forward to having a chat with Rupert. I want to see how he is caring for my grandchildren.”

Buffy was absolutely in hysterics it was something that spread to everyone, “You know the funniest part?”

Natasha was the one to answer, “The fact that she thought the arm pat would reassure him.”

“Yeah.”



The cars pulled up to the townhouse and Tony could admit he was impressed even the others Avengers were staring in surprise apart from Clint and Natasha.

The team watched in relief as Phil was wheeled in quickly followed by Victoria and Clint. Buffy wanted to follow immediately but she knew what her duties were first. It would not be fair to bring the Avengers to London and then dump them in the lap of Nora.

Buffy turned to see the remaining Avengers, apart from Natasha, stare in shock at their surroundings.

Tony frowned when he saw Natasha didn’t show any shock, “Why aren’t you shocked? Clint I get; it would seem his niece lives here.”

Natasha tilted her head trying to decide if it was worth shocking the billionaire, “True but my wife lives here.”

She left a shocked billionaire in the doorway heading to her rooms. All the major players of the council kept rooms/apartments at the Council House.

A minute later his shock was forgotten when he heard an unholy squeal of joy. He watched in fascination as Buffy was swarmed by a gaggle of teen girls all speaking quicker than he had ever heard.

Steve watched fascinated but slightly timid remembering Buffy’s warning. Buffy knew that this could go on for a while so put her fingers in her mouth to whistle, “Yo, you have training now. These are guests who are not to be attacked; pranked or annoyed for at least 48 hours or I will spar with the rule breakers.”

Rona snickered, “Come on pip-squeaks you don’t want to make the Queen mad.”

Buffy sighed she had tried for two years to lose the nickname but had failed. At such a point, you either walk around permanently aggrieved or give in. She chose the easier option.

Buffy smiled seeing her sister slayer, “Faith we have a few guests. Try not to break them they are meant to keep New York standing.”

Sure enough, just like she predicted Faith zeroed in on Steve, giving him a salacious grin. It made Steve feel like a piece of meat and reminded him of that female clerk from the War. Steve didn’t have a chance to argue though as Faith hooked his arm around hers and took him towards his room.

Nora didn’t bother to hide her grin as she called out, which room he was assigned.

The only people left from the group were Bruce and Tony. Buffy could see Bruce’s confusion and taking pity on him explained, “The council has special wards to stop transformations and if you feel the need to let the big-guy out we have magically reinforced rooms downstairs.”

Bruce actually let out a sigh of relief; he was at ease for the first time in several years. He didn’t think he would ever be able to repay the gift. Buffy shook her head stopping any thank you, “Don’t worry a friend is travelling from Nepal who I think can help you.”

She looked at her watch; she was starting to feel her tiredness. She had been awake for over 48 hours fighting apocalypses, collecting wayward fake dead relatives and trying to keep others from diving off the deep end. She really wanted to sleep but she wanted to check in with her Dad and Uncles first.

She turned back to her guests, “Sorry that I can’t stay but I got a gazzilon things to do so Nora will show you to your rooms. Word to the wise, do what Nora says everyone listens or she gets her own back.”

Buffy listened as she walked up the grand stair case to the conversation below.

Tony asked Bruce, “Think she’ll marry me, I’m rich.”

She heard the clap on the shoulder, “Well she doesn’t seem to be lacking in funds and she’ll need to see past your sparkling personality but maybe.”

Buffy grinned, “Maybe indeed.”

---------------------------------End Chapter One ---------------------------------------------------------

Next up: Buffy has a chat with Uncle Clint returning the favour he did after she was returned from heaven. At the same time, the insight stories are still being written so any thoughts or requests are read with interest.

Authors note 2 Okay so the big sequel is started. This is a WIP which will be updated a minimum of once a week but while I have free time I’m aiming for every three days. As always please read and review I love to hear your thoughts and comments.
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