*Warning, character spoilers for Order of the Phoenix.
You all are about to be hit with a lot of information. Also, playing with timelines here... sort of. Characters introduced or mentioned in OotP are introduced here, but nothing that's happened in OotP has happened here. Make sense? Also, a character from season 7 Buffy is being brought in.
*~* Roll Call *~*
The staffroom had been infused with extra chairs and couches to accommodate all the people there.
Spike and Amy were the last ones to arrive. Dumbledore had sent Dobby to tell Spike about the meeting earlier, and was highly amused when the house elf had let slip that Miss Amy was in Master William's room, and the two of them had been sharing a bed. There was instant murmuring when Amy walked in wearing her blanket still... with clothes underneath, naturally.
The whispering was not because Amy was wearing her blanket though, but because the clothing she was wearing under it was obviously some of Spike's. The faded blue jeans were cinched tightly with a belt to hold them up. Yes, the black t shirt was very faded and had a hole near the collar, but it looked comfortable. And her feet weren't bare. A pair of thick gray wool socks covered them, and someone had very carefully brushed and braided her long brown hair.
Angel was glaring, and it seemed both Cordelia and Gunn had restraining hands on him.
McGonagall leaned over to Dumbledore. "Perhaps I should take Amy shopping for clothes of her own."
Everyone was clumped in groups. Spike shocked them all by putting Amy near Willow then going to speak with Buffy.
Several people were finally noticing other people.
"What in the bloody hell is HE doing here?" Giles said
"I'll say." But Anya was glaring in another direction.
"Shit." 'Moody' Sirius muttered.
Angel pointed. "Who let him and his evil hand in here?"
Lorne was just staring with his mouth open.
"Is anybody else concerned that there's a soulless vampire over there?" Faith snapped.
Hermione waved. "Hi, Oz."
Wesley was turning green. "Good Lord."
"Did you really have to bring soldier-boy, luv?" Spike asked Buffy.
Then it descended into nothing more than jumble. Most everyone was talking at once.
Everyone turned and looked at Dumbledore.
"We are all here under the same cause..."
Tara snorted and laughed evilly. She had not been noticed so much until then. The witch was in a straight jacket and strapped to a bed that was slanted to and upright position. Almost as if she were on a dolly with a mattress attached. It eerily reminded Dawn of Silence of the Lambs, but Tara didn't have that face mask thing on.
"The same cause? The same cause? Right, grandpa." Tara screeched and tossed her head back and forth. "Shut up! Bitch! Ya don't get ta talk here!"
"Perhaps... introductions... Harry, perhaps you could start us off?"
Everyone looked at him. Harry stood.
"Um, I'm Harry Potter." His voice squeaked.
Draco rolled his eyes. "You're so smooth, Potter. Draco Malfoy."
"Vir-Vriginia Weasley. Ginny." She glared at her family. "I'm Draco's girlfriend."
"Dawn Summers, Buffy's sister."
"Lily Joyce Rosenberg. I used to be a vampire in an alternate dimension, but now I'm a real girl. Specifically, I was Professor Rosenberg as a vampire."
Lily elbowed him.
"Connor Angel. I'm the bastard son of two vampires. I am also called the miracle child and the destroyer."
Lily elbowed him again.
Dawn rolled her eyes. "His vampire parents are Angel also known as Angelus the scourge of Europe and Darla."
"Ronald Weasley. Ron."
"I'm Poppy Pomfrey. I'm the school nurse." The woman said from her bent position of examining Ginny.
Willow stepped up. "I'm Professor Willow Rosenberg. I'm the aid to Professor Giles in Defense Against the Dark Arts. This is Amy." Willow said motioning to Amy. "Amy Madison. She's had some trauma, so she's not much with the speaking just now."
"Severus Snape. Potions."
She glared. "Anya Emerson. I'm the assistant to Professor Lupin for History and Lore of Magical Creatures."
"And I'm Professor Remus Lupin."
"And he's a werewolf." Someone muttered.
"Yeah, so what about it?" Anya snapped.
"There's something wrong with being a werewolf?" A calm voice across the room asked.
"Hi, Oz." Hermione called again causing Ron to glare at her.
"Hey, Hermione. What's up?"
"Professor Rupert Giles. Defense Against the Dark Arts."
"Woo hoo! G-man!"
"Xander, while I appreciate the enthusiasm-"
"Minerva McGonagall. Deputy Headmistress, Transfiguration professor, and head of Gryffindor house."
"Wesley Wyndham-Pryce. History of Magic professor. Former watcher."
Faith snorted. "Current watcher. He's MY watcher. I'm Faith. I'm a vampire slayer."
"Oliver Wood. I'm the assistant flying instructor... and Faith's boyfriend."
Several people looked at him sharply, including Faith.
"Er... Rubeus Hagrid, keeper of keys and grounds at Hogwarts, and er, I teach Care of Magical Creatures. Call me Hagrid."
"I'm his assistant." Spike hollered. "Not for the teaching, but the keeping bit. Name's Spike."
"My William is also William the Bloody." A singsong voice said.
Spike at her. "Not yours anymore, Dru. Spike tastes like ashes, remember? Someone prefers other sorts of demons."
"He's also William Malfoy." Draco piped in. "Isn't that right, Uncle Spike?"
"Uncle Spike?" Narcissa asked.
"Your Draco's mum, right?"
Narcissa nodded. Spike crossed the room smoothly, took her hand, and licked the back of it.
"Eww." Xander said. "Spike cooties."
Buffy elbowed him.
"You are an adult."
"So says you."
"Spike, please don't lick my mother." Draco said dryly.
"Quite right, dear... William was it?" Narcissa purred. "You don't know where I've been."
Draco made a horrified face.
Professor Flitwick giggled. "Professor Filius Flitwick. Head of Ravenclaw house. I teach Charms."
"Rolonda Hooch. Flying instructor."
"Professor Pomona Sprout. I teach Herbology, and I'm the head of Hufflepuff house."
"Irma Pince. I'm the librarian."
"Victoria Vector. Arithmancy."
"Siobhan Sinistra. Professor of Astronomy ."
"Argus Filch. Caretaker." He snapped.
"Sybil Trelawny. Divination professor and seer."
Four people snorted audibly... though many were thinking something along the lines of a snort. One of the vocal was Drusilla, another was Cordelia, yet another was Tara, and the last was a teenage blonde girl standing near Buffy.
"Alastor 'Mad-Eye' Moody." Sirius said in his best grizzle.
He was standing next to the bed with Tara strapped to it. "This body is Professor Tara Maclay, assistant potions mistress, daughter to Remus Lupin.... but the spirit speaking just now is Alan Francis Doyle. When I was living, I was part human and part Bracken demon.... as well as bein' a seer for a champion named Angel. Also, I ain't the only thing swirlin' about in this girl's head."
Tara tossed her head then and gasped. "Sirius?"
And despite himself, he answered her. "Yes."
There was much shouting from the wizarding community among them who didn't know. An older witch with a mane of raven hair jumped at him, tackling Sirius in his 'Moody' suit to the floor. She had her wand at his throat.
"Hello, cousin Andromeda."
Harry was looking. The woman looked exactly like Narcissa Malfoy except she had black hair like Sirius.
"Sirius Black." She hissed.
"Mum, can you get up? I'm sure Dumbledore wouldn't have him here without a good reason."
"Quite right, Nymphadora." Dumbledore answered while the young woman cringed at the use of her name. "Best to get it all out now if we are to work this with any hope of success. Truth must be known here. Sirius is not the murderer he is believed to be. He was framed by Peter Pettigrew."
"Pettigrew's dead." Andromeda snapped.
"Is he now, sister?" Narcissa remarked. "Funny that a dead man was staying at Malfoy Manor but a few months ago."
"Sister!" Draco shouted.
Andromeda leveled her brilliant blue gaze at him. "I'm your Auntie Andy, Draco."
The young woman who'd called Andromeda mum raised a hand. "Wotcher, Draco. I'm your cousin Tonks."
"I've just got family coming out my arse then."
"Draco Malfoy, watch your mouth!"
Andromeda snorted. "He's so you, Cissa." She looked around the room "The name's Andromeda Black Tonks. This is my daughter Nymphadora."
The young woman cringed again at the use of her given name. Her heart-shaped face was graced with black curls and big blue eyes. She looked like a younger version of Andromeda, but with short curls.
Andromeda helped Sirius to his feet. Well, foot and peg leg.... as he was still Moody-fied.
"Can it really be you in there, cousin?"
"It is, Andy."
"You were framed... and we none of us considered that. We thought you guilty.... of killing James and Lily. Bloody hell, Sirius. I don't know what to say. The evidence is so against you, cousin."
"I hope to rectify that one day by apparating into the middle of the Ministry of Magic holding Peter."
Andromeda nodded curtly then threw her arms about him. "When will you be normal again? This is polyjuice, correct? I want to see what you look like now."
"I'm an old man."
Tara snorted. "Hardly."
"Hello, I'm Arthur Weasley. I'm Ron and Ginny's father, as well as father to Bill, Charlie, Percy, Fred, and George and husband to Molly here. I work for the Ministry of Magic in the Misuse of Muggle Artifacts Department."
"I'm Arthur's wife Molly." Said the mother earth-looking redhead in the patchwork dress next to him.
A tall redhead with hair way past his shoulders and an earring stepped forward. "I'm Bill Weasley. I work for Gringotts. It's a wizard bank for those that don't know. I'm a curse-breaker. It's what it sounds like."
"I'm Charlie Weasley. I work with dragons." He was shorter and tightly packed with muscles. His red hair was short and stuck up off his head. There was a shadow of red stubble across his jaws.
"You work with... what?" A girl from Angel's group of extras asked. "Did you say... dragons?"
"Yes I did."
Percy cleared his throat and pushed his glasses up on his nose. "I'm Percy Weasley. I work at the Ministry under Cornelius Fudge."
There was much grumbling from the wizards at the name Fudge.
"I'm Fred Weasley."
"No I'm Fred. He's George Weasley."
"Rubbish. I'm Fred. He's George."
"Stop it, you two." Molly hissed.
Bill and Charlie exchanged a smirk. They knew they'd have to help people tell them apart.
"Actually, I'm Fred." Said a tall thin brunette. "Winifred Burkle, but most everybody calls me Fred. So hiya. I work for Angel Investigations. I, um, know a lot about portals and physics."
Cordelia elbowed him.
"I'm a vampire."
He was elbowed again.
"A souled vampire."
"Oh my God. Do I have to do this for you?"
"Well, what do you want me to say?"
"How about you're a champion for the Powers That Be? You help the hopeless? You're Connor's dad?"
"What she said."
Cordelia rolled her eyes. "Cordelia Chase. Seer. Half demon. Higher being."
"Higher being?" Buffy asked.
"Yeah, I ascended to a higher plane of existence at the beginning of the summer, but I had to come back."
"Angel was mucking. You know how he likes to muck things up."
"Mmmm." Buffy nodded in agreement.
"Standing right here." Angel snapped.
"Anyways..." Gunn said, standing up. "I'm Charles Gunn. Everybody calls me Gunn 'cept Fred. I work for my boy Angel, all mucking aside."
"Hey there, everybody. I'm Krevlorneswath of the Deathwok Clan, but you can call me Lorne. Actually, I beg you to call me Lorne. I don't hail from Hell-A originally, but it's home. I was born in a different dimension called Pylea... and thank the Gods, Goddess, and all those of a deity nature I got sucked into this world. Woo hoo."
The pipe smoking wizard stepped forth. Harry was thinking he looked a lot like Dumbledore.
"I'm Aberforth Dumbledore. I manage a bit of this rabble." He said motioning to the wizards and witches near him, including Tonks and Andromeda. "Oh, and I'm his little brother." Aberforth nodded to Professor Dumbledore.
Harry gaped. Dumbledore had mentioned that he had a brother. Well, mentioned once in passing. Aberforth Dumbledore reminded Harry of a cross between Albus Dumbledore and Albert Einstein. His hair stuck up oddly like Einstein's had, but the face was remarkably like the headmaster's, even down to the twinkle in his blue eyes.
"I'm Madam Rosmerta. I'm the proprietor of Three Broomsticks in Hogsmeade. It's sort of like a pub for those of you who've never been." The curvy woman said with a toss of her honey-colored hair.
"Kingsley Shacklebolt. I'm an Auror. So's Tonks, though she failed to mention it with her mum attacking Black and all."
"I am Viktor Krum. I verk for Kingsley. I am training to be an Auror."
Harry and Ron were gaping. They had not noticed him standing behind the tall, bald, black guy with the gold hoop in one ear that called himself Kingsley Shacklebolt. Viktor was staring at Hermione. Ron scooted closer to her.
"I think we've all established that I am Narcissa Black Malfoy. Draco's mother. Andromeda's sister. Sirius's cousin."
"I'm Ethan Rayne."
Hermione gasped. She remembered hearing of him from Giles. None of it had been favorable. What on earth was he doing here?
"Give me one reason why I shouldn't haul you outside and beat the everlasting hell out of you."
"Rupert." McGonagall gasped.
"Easy now, Ripper. You still cross about that Fyarl thing?"
"This is the wanker that turned you into a Fyarl demon that time?" Spike asked.
Giles nodded in the affirmative.
Spike snorted before looking back to Ethan. "You'll be lucky if ALL he does is beat the everlasting hell out of you, mate."
Buffy snorted then. "Only if Giles can beat me to him."
"Nasty slayer. Hiss hiss hiss."
"Hi, Drusilla. Act up and you'll get the business end of my stake." Buffy snapped. "What IS the Mistress of Loonyland doing here?"
"Drusilla's a seer." Narcissa said.
"Drusilla's a vicious killer." Buffy countered.
"Is this about you little slayer friend with the dark eyes and the caramel skin... skin that sliced open so nice for mummy."
Buffy lunged. It was Faith who grabbed her.
"Don't, B. It's what she wants." The dark slayer looked over she shoulder at Dru. "You keep taunting her, and I will take you apart. Piece by piece, princess kitty, and I will love every second of it. You dig, mistress of pain?"
Drusilla pouted and made a whimpering sound. "The naughty slayer is mean. Rrrrrruff!"
Faith rolled her eyes. "And they say I'm a psycho."
"D'Hoffryn, you bastard! What are you doing here?!" Anya practically shouted.
"Aberforth is an old friend. He asked me to assist, Anyanka."
"Let's get this straight." Remus growled. "Her name's Anya. She's isn't a demon anymore, and you can't have her back."
Willow stepped out where D'Hoffryn could see her. "Really."
"Ah, Willow. How delightful. You protecting Anyank... Anya."
"You just be sure you're here for Dumbledore's brother and not here on vengeance business."
D'Hoffryn held up his hands on surrender. "I'm here as a favor. Nothing more."
"Still off men, are we?"
Snape leaned around her. "No. As a matter of fact she is not."
"Well, you certainly ran out and found the scariest thing with a penis available."
Anya rolled her eyes. "Oh shut up. You're just bitter because she didn't want my old job after you fired me the first time."
"Hi. I'm Clement. Clem. I provide snacks... and uh, obviously I'm not human."
Buffy gave Clem's saggy arm a pat. "You do more than provide snacks, Clem."
Ron made a face. "Eww."
"Not that kind of more, Ron. Geez, pervert."
"Ronald Weasley!" Molly snapped.
"Yeah, eww. Like I'd touch her anyhow. Look how tight her skin is. Gross."
"Thanks Clem. Because you know I just wasn't feeling unwanted enough these days."
"Unwanted? Her?" Bill was leaned over to Charlie whispering loudly. "She's kidding, right?"
"As I said earlier, I'm Buffy Summers. I'm a vampire slayer. I guard the Hellmouth in Sunnydale, California. Dawn's my little sister, and Giles used to be my watcher until he found a real job, the slacker."
"Um hi. Xander Harris here. I used to provide snacks, but alas, I have moved up to moral support and body disposal."
"I'm Oz. Uh Daniel Ozbourne. I provide much needed sarcasm. Oh wait no, that's not me." He looked at the guy next to him. "That's you. Anyhow, I'm Oz. I get a little hairy around the full moon... if I forget to do my chants and wear my beads."
The guy next to Oz had an irritated look on his face. "You done?"
"Finished. Cakes are done. You know, for a lawyer, you sure don't know much about the English language."
"You know, for someone who's supposedly laconic, you sure have talked a lot today."
"Can we get on with this?" A redheaded woman slightly behind them snapped.
Connor sucked in air sharply when he noticed her.
The guy next to Oz sighed. "I'm Lindsey McDonald-"
"And he has an evil hand!" Angel yelled, pointing. "Evil hand! Evil! Hand of evil!"
Buffy was looking at Angel oddly. "What are you? Five? I can't believe I dated you."
"Oh is that what you kids are calling having sex these days." Spike quipped. "In that case, Buffy and I have dated A LOT."
"Shut up, Spike!" Buffy and Angel hollered at the same time.
Then Angel stalked over to where she was. "You had sex with Spike?" He muttered in a low tone.
"Do you really think NOW is the time for this conversation?"
"Right. Sorry. The lawyer with the EVIL HAND was explaining how he fits in with you and yours."
"This is SO typical."
"Big bad Angel - he knows everything. First impressions are always completely correct, huh? People change, Angel."
"Not people with evil hands."
"We had this conversation once before, Angel. When you were harboring Faith, and I was dating Riley. Do you remember? We don't live in each other's worlds anymore. You don't know why Lindsey's living with me."
"He's LIVING with you?"
"So are Oz and Justine."
That's when Angel noticed the snippy redhead standing behind Oz and Lindsey. "You." He growled.
"Back off! If anyone and Justine have a right to be mad at one another, it should be her being mad at Wesley. After all, he did chain her up in his closet all this past summer."
"She helped dump me in the ocean and made my son believe I had killed the man who raised him." Angel spat, enunciating every word perfectly.
"And she's trying to atone for that."
Angel rolled his eyes and stomped back over to where Cordelia was sitting with Fred.
"So anyway... " This tree trunk of a guy standing next to Justine said. "I'm Graham Miller. I just moved back to Sunnydale, and I'm rooming at Xander's for now. I used to be in this government issued monster squad, but that went a little... bad, and it's a long boring story dealing with secret funding. Long story short, I ended up back in Sunnydale, and hooked up with Buffy."
"This is your new boyfriend? Government? Is he friends with that Riley moron?" Angel said.
Cordelia rolled her eyes.
Buffy held Graham back when he attempted to stalk forward. "No, Graham is not my boyfriend."
Charlie nudged Bill.
"Yes, he was in the Initiative. And don't call Riley a moron. He's not a moron."
"Left you, didn't he?" Angel snapped.
"Yeah, well, so did you."
It suddenly got very quiet.
"Hi, I'm Cassie. Cassandra Newton. I go to Sunnydale High, the new Sunnydale High. Buffy's my guidance counselor, which is really ironic considering I told her we needed to come here before the big head came up in the fire at her house. Sometimes I know things before they happen. I decided to come because I'm going to die soon."
"Will you stop saying that? You are not going to die. I am not going to let you die."
Giles was looking at Buffy. "You're a guidance counselor? At a high school?"
"Oh like high school librarian is so much more distinguished. At least people wanna see me. No one ever wanted to go to the library."
"Ok, are we done there? Good." Said a blonde woman standing with one last little group that was part of Angel's extended entourage. "I'm Kate Lockley. I used to be a detective for the LAPD."
"I thought you looked familiar." Faith said.
"Why are there no bars around her?"
"Easy, Detective Lockley." Wesley said. "Faith's my responsibility now."
"So I'll blame you when she goes psycho killer spree again."
"Hey!" Buffy said.
Faith raised a brow. "I think spree is a bit of a stretch. Crime spree yes, psycho killer spree... not so much."
"She wouldna do tha'!" Oliver boomed.
Faith gave him a pat on the thigh. "Easy, kitten."
"So..." The girl who'd question Charlie about the dragons earlier rose. "The name is Gwen Raiden, and this place is making me all weird."
Angel looked at her. Gwen removed her long black gloves. Blue sparks immediately started crackling along her hands, then the electricity reached out and connected in a strange strand between her fingertips. Shortly after that, her hair started to stand on end... like with static electricity. Suddenly there was a bright flash of blue, and Gwen was thrown across the room. As if she'd been struck by lightening.
"Whoa." Fred and George muttered at the same time.
"Hogwarts did that to her?" Draco muttered. "Suddenly don't want to be in school anymore."
"Remarkable." Professor Dumbledore said. "My dear is your body infused with electricity? You attract and are able to manipulate current."
"Give the man a prize." Gwen groaned.
"Only you have very little control over it since walking into the school, correct?"
"Ding ding ding."
"The magical wards of Hogwarts are so many that it has an adverse effect on electricity. We shall have to work something out for you. I doubt you want this remarkable gift of yours going haywire for the duration of your visit."
"Do what you gotta do to keep me from repeatedly getting shock treatment." Gwen said as she started pulling her gloves back on.
"Perhaps Professor Flitwick and I could come up with a charm?" Willow asked. "Since he's so charm-y and I'm all knowing about the electrical stuff. Maybe Fred, Winifred Fred, could help since she's all about the physics?"
Fred glared at Gwen in a way that let Gwen know she was still irritated about Gwen electrocuting Gunn to death that time. God forbid the girl remember that Gwen also brought him back to life.
"So hi. I'm Anne. I'll make this quick because I think I have magical jet-lag or something. I'm all tired. I live in LA, and I run a teen shelter. Gunn is one of my oldest and dearest friends... and uh, hi Buffy."
"I was thinking maybe that was you. Teen shelter. It fits. Still Anne."
"It was a good name."
"I am the Groosalugg. But am called Groo by my princess and her people. I am from Pylea. I came when Angel suggested there were many battles to be fought here."
A green-skinned demon who looked to be the same type of demon as Lorne stood and beat one fist on his chest. "I am Landok of the Deathwok Clan. I also come to fight. I am cousin to Krevlorneswath. This is his brother Numfar who does not speak but dances. Numfar, do the dance of introduction."
Numfar, also green and demon-y, started prancing around and kicking up one leg. Lorne groaned and put a hand over his face.
"Remarkable." Dumbledore said, looking truly delighted with Numfar. "I am Albus Dumbledore. I am headmaster of this school. Quarters have been made available for all our guests here at Hogwarts. The house elves will be along shortly to show everyone to their rooms and see to any needs any of you might have. I will meet tomorrow morning with Miss Buffy Summers, Angel, and Aberforth to discuss things... as they are seemingly the leaders of each of our respective groups. Then we shall all meet again in a few days. Until then, I welcome each of you to explore your new surroundings to acquaint yourself with Hogwarts. And I'm sure any of our students or former students here... or perhaps staff members would be willing to show those of you around who are visiting us for the first time."
Numfar did a very pretty pirouette.
"Not ruddy likely." Draco muttered. "I'm not showing anyone bugger'all."
"You are not too old for me to spank, Draco Malfoy. Mind your manners." Narcissa snapped.
Draco had the good sense to look properly shocked... and Numfar still danced.
"THIS... is the crack team that's going to foil Voldemort's latest plan? If he ever sees that..." Spike motioned to Numfar who was still shuffling about. "He's going to be deeply shamed."
AN: Most of the Potterverse names were taken from the HP Lexicon. Dumbledore's brother Aberforth was mentioned in GoF. Siobhan is pronounced "shuh VAHN". It's Irish with roots in Hebrew.