Disclaimer: Ok, honestly, you really think I'm J.K Rowling or Constance M. Burge? You think I'm making money off this stuff or trying to steal it? Uh....ok....that's your perogitive.
I do not own Harry Potter or Charmed. Anyone who thinks otherwise can realize that if I owned this stuff, I probably wouldn't be posting it on a FANFICTION website. I would be writing a BOOK or and EPISODE.
Paige Palmer was a fairly ordinary girl. She lived at 3 Privet Drive, just next to the Dursleys.
And by God, she hated it.
The people were mad. Mrs. Dursley would forever be spying on her when she was exercising- she was a freestyle skier, thank you very much, and she had to keep it up if she ever wanted to be in the Olympics one day; Mr. Dursley was loud, obnoxious, and....sometimes Paige wondered if the only reason that Mr. Dursley had a job was to yell at people; and Dudley was a spoiled child, treated like a fricking saint when really, all he was was a big, fat, major asshole who tried to bully everyone in the neighborhood, including Paige until he found out she could hit right back.
Harry, on the other hand, was the only person Paige actually liked at 4 Privet Drive. He was kind, sweet, brave.... he didn't make Paige want to punch him. Which was very good, since Paige punched hard.
Paige and Harry were best friends. It had all started back in kinder-garden, when Paige, Harry, and Dudley had been in the same class. A few weeks after classes had begun, Dudley had put together his "gang" and had started becoming the class bully. Since he already bullied Harry at home, they decided to start with him.
Well....they pretty quickly figured out that Paige punched really hard. She guessed it was all the training, because even in kinder-garden, she was already a veteran on the slopes and had dreams of being an Olympian one day.
Harry thanked Paige, and the two got to talking. Eventually they started sitting with each other a lot, and the rest was, well, history.
Paige knew exactly what happened behind closed doors at number 4. Bloody hell, everyone in the whole damn neighborhood knew. Still, all the neighbors were assholes- did she even have to mention her mortal enemy, Tyler Fray (who by the way, had a crush on Dudley....eww!)- and thought that Harry deserved it. The only people who seemed concerned at all were Mr and Mrs. Palmer, who had called Child Services at least a dozen times because of what Paige had told them and what they had heard. Still...they did bloody nothing.
But that didn't mean Paige and Harry couldn't be friends. Whenever Harry needed to get far, far away from the Dursleys he would go outside and play with Paige, maybe even sleep over. It didn't happen often enough, since he had at least a million chores, but he was welcome to come skiing with Paige, even when she had practice he could ski along the side, or rowing, hiking, swimming, yoga, workouts.....and of course, they could talk for hours on end, work on homework together, and the Palmers tried to be friends with the Dursleys (for the first few years...by third grade Mrs. Palmer was so disgusted she begged Paige to keep her away from Mrs. Dursley). Of course, the Dursleys hated that Harry was so happy with Paige. Which was exactly why they hid the exact state of their friendship. They weren't that stupid.
So, it was just an ordinary day on Privet Drive. Paige was up already- inside the house she quickly went into her strength exercises and yoga poses before getting up, showering, and dressed in a cute blue top with the stars and jeans, grabbing the present for Dudley (the cheapest little piece of crap snow globe she could find...she just wanted an excuse to see Harry), and walked over to her neighbors.
When Mrs. Dursley opened the door, Paige put on a large, fake smile. "Hi, Mrs. Dursley! I'm here to wish Dudley a happy birthday and give him a present from the family. Can I come in?"
Mrs. Dursley recognized her as Paige, a friend of Dudley's. They weren't very good friends, but they were neighbors and often talked and such. Harry was also friends with her, but the Dursleys made sure that it wasn't a very large part of Harry's life.
Paige had a deal with Dudley- pretend that they were somewhat friends so that Paige could see Harry a little more often than she usually could, and Paige wouldn't tie his underwear (which no one deserved to see) up on top of the school flag post again. The school still hadn't caught her for that one.
Spotting Harry's cabinet door open, she looked in quickly. Finding the alarm clock, she reminded herself to buy Harry a new one for his birthday- a pink fuzzy one he had borrowed from her didn't suit him at all. She looked at the picture on the side table and scowled; the picture portrayed a happy, loving couple, not one she knew beat Harry every night. She saw the light flickering in Harry's cupboard, as well as the electricity meter and shook her head: Bloody idiots, they're quite well off and they can't even get Harry a bloody light that works. Finally, out of a dirty sock on the floor (Harry hadn't made the bed or cleaned anything in the cupboard yet) crawled.....oh dear God, was that a spider? Paige hated spiders!
She scurried into the kitchen and smiled. "Hey Dudley! I brought a present. Happy Birthday!" Using sign language that she and Harry had learned a long time ago, she quickly used the hand away from the Dursleys to talk to the cook. Hi Harry. How bad is it this year?
Dudley obsessed over the present- excited he got 37 presents before the day was even over- as Paige sat down. She made eye contact with Harry and he signed his response to her. Let's see....one of these days the pompous git is going to either fall through the stairs on my head or push me so hard into the wall he'll break my arm, Aunt Petunia and Uncle Vernon are obsessing over him and telling me not to burn something I've known how to make since I was six, and you just missed Dudley throwing a tantrum because he get 36 presents instead of 37- you just made him very happy.
Paige shook her head in a minute movement. God, I wish I hadn't; I just wanted an excuse to see you. If it makes you feel any better, I got the cheapest little piece of crap I could find. Are you going to Mrs. Figg's again?
No, he signed back, Mrs. Figg broke her leg. I get to go along as well. We're going to the zoo.
Paige smirked. Mind if I tag along? I was planning on heading there to see the new snakes at some point anyway.
You think I care? Harry managed to even sign it sarcastically. In fact, please do.
"Don't just stand there, boy! Bring the girl some eggs! You're being inhospitable!" Mr. Dursley shouted at Harry.
"Oh it's alright, Mr. Dursley," Paige answered. "I already had breakfast. I should probably be going, anyway, if I want to get a bike ride in before I go out for the day. It was nice seeing you, Dudley," What time are you leaving?
When Dudley's friend gets here, about 9:30.
Cool, see you then. Paige smiled and got up. "Thank you for letting me in Mr. And Mrs. Dursley. Bye!" And with that, Paige Palmer left, thanking goodness she survived the encounter without killing anyone.
Paige smiled as she walked into the zoo with her mom, knowing that Harry should be right behind them. "Thanks again, Mom,"
"No problem, sweetheart. Harry is sporting more bruises again. Has he told you anything else?"
Paige sighed. "Mom, child services is doing nothing and if I tell you everything I knew, you would most likely go over there to kill the Dursley's yourself. As much as I would love that, my Mom the murderer wouldn't really go well on career day. Oh look, here they come!" She waved at the Dursley's. "Hi Dudley! Fancy seeing you here!"
Dudley smiled in fear. "Uh....h-hi Paige, why are you here?"
"Just came to see the snakes," Paige shrugged. "They're cute,"
Mrs. Palmer was talking to Mrs. Dursley. "We can take him off your hands if you like, so Dudley can enjoy his birthday," she said.
"Thank you very much!" The woman screeched. "It was just bad luck that Mrs. Figg broke her leg," She turned to Harry. "Potter! You'll be spending the day with Mrs. Palmer and Paige. Please be polite and I am not responsable for your ride home if you are here later than five," She turned back. "I feel bad for you. Potter can be a real pain,"
Paige saw her mother grit her teeth. "Come on, Mom, Harry," she said, pulling her mother away from what would surely be a murder scene if Paige wasn't delicate with the situation. "Let's go see the monkeys,"
Harry smiled as he spent the day. They joked and laughed, and when they stopped for ice cream, Harry was allowed to get whatever they wanted, unlike if he was with Aunt Putunia and Dudley. He fantasized a lot when he was younger about living with Paige and the Palmers instead of the Dursley's. Her mom was sweet, kind, and caring, and her dad was supportive and really fostered her kick ass personality.
Paige had confided in him long ago that she was adopted. She explained her parents had gotten her from a local church in San Francisco, where she had lived for four years before her Dad's job had transferred her to Little Whinging. According to her mother, the nun was either insane or had witnessed a miracle, but she said her parents were apparently angels. Paige had snorted at that. The only thing 'magical' about her was her crazy ability to understand languages almost as soon as they're spoken to her- which explained her knack for signing where Harry had kind of struggled. But that was just a talent- right?
He kind of wished that they had let the Palmers adopt him instead of the Dursleys. They had already adopted anyway.
"Harry?" Paige flicked him on the shoulder. "Earth to Harry...something on your mind?"
"Oh," he shook his head. "Not really, Paige. I just wish that I lived with you and your parents instead of with my Uncle and Aunt,"
Paige smirked. "Don't we all," Her face grew a bit more serious. "But in all honesty, Harry, they're nutso in the head zone. So is child services, for leaving you there,"
Harry laughed at the completely American phrase. "Where did you learn to speak, again?"
Paige full on slapped him. "Hey! No making fun of my lack of a British accent!"
This playfulness went on all the way through lunch and to the snakes- which, at the moment, Paige was dragging Harry towards against his will.
"Come on, Harry! I want to see the snakes!"
Harry protested by digging his heels in, but he was no match for Paige's damn legendary upper body strength. "Paige, I just saw Dudley walk in there!"
She turned back to Harry, she hadn't even realized. "Oh, Hare.....look, if the pudgy butterball so much as breaths the air your breathing, I'll throttle him, alright? But we have, like, twenty minutes until we are out of time, and I still haven't seen what I really wanted to see!"
The famous Paige pout won Harry over and they walked into the reptile house.
Paige looked over at a snake and nudged Harry. "They can't afford good lights for this place; the exhibit's flickering,"
Harry looked up and nodded; the bulb looked like his own in the cupboard.
"Oh, Harry, look!" Harry looked up- damn, Paige was fast!- and saw his dark haired friend entranced by a newt.
The boy chuckled. He put his arm around her and hugged. "Only you, Paige....only you would get excited by a newt crawling up a tree,"
Paige pouted. "It was a pretty newt," Harry just laughed harder. "Harry James Potter! What did I say about making fun of me?!"
"You didn't say anything about teasing you in general," The boy with the lightning bolt scar pointed out. "You should notice that I stayed far away from your atrocious accent,"
"Shut it," Paige bit out in mock anger. She playfully stomped over to the Brazilian Boa Constrictor- what she had wanted to see all day. Unfortunately, as Harry noticed when he walked over to her, Dudley, his friend and his father wanted to see the snake as well.
"Make it move," The fat boy said to his father.
Vernon Dursley made three knocks on the glass. "Move!"
Dudley followed suit, albeit louder. "Move!!"
"Stop it!" Paige cried.
Harry picked up the line. "He's asleep!"
Dudley threw it off. "He's boring,"
Mercifully, the giant idiot walked away, and Harry held a hand on Paige's shoulder to keep her from stomping over there and kicking his ass. "Harry, let go! I want to throttle the idiot!"
"Take a few deep breaths, Paige," he advised.
"Right," she replied, looking away from Dudley and following the advice. "Why do you not want me to hit him anyway? He tortures you!"
Harry sighed. "Because I know you. And if you hit him, he'll be in the hospital and I'll be the one getting punished for it,"
"Sorry, Hares, I forgot your relatives are jack asses. How are you related to them again?"
"My Mom is Aunt Petunia's older sister," He answered.
Paige scowled. "How could someone as nice as you come from someone who's related to that?"
Harry didn't answer as he looked to the snake. It felt stupid, but he felt he should apologize to the snake for his cousin. Knowing Paige wouldn't call him crazy, he did. "Sorry about him. He doesn't know what it's like, lying there day after day,"
Paige realized his complex and decided to help. "Plus he's an ass. It's a really bad excuse, but he is,"
The snake raised it's head and looked at the two. Paige's eyes nearly bugged out of her head.
"Can you hear us?" Harry asked in shock.
"H-harry," Paige stuttered, "Th-that is....it's n-not possible," All of a sudden, she had a small, pounding headache.
"I've never talked to a snake before, but he's looking at us and that's our best explanation,"
"Can you hear us?" Paige asked uncertainly
The snake nodded .
"Oh my god," Paige muttered, hands reaching up to rub her temples. She had a full grade headache now. "Um, you're from Brazil, right?"
"Was it nice there?" Harry asked. "Do you miss your family?"
The snake looked pointedly at the sign, which read that the specimen was bred in captivity.
"I see," The black haired boy replied. "That's us as well. My parents died when I was a baby,"
"And mine gave me up," Paige pointed out. "I never knew them, although my parents say they were angels,"
"Dad! DAD! You won't believe what this snake is doing!" The butterball otherwise known as Dudley called out. He ran up to the exhibit, shoved Harry and Paige back, and put his face up against the glass.
Harry looked to Paige in concern. Her hands were cradled around her skull, as if she was trying to hold the pain in. He knew that sometimes- usually when something absolutely unexplainable happened- she suffered from skull splitting migranes. And around him, he didn't know how, but he knew they happened.
He also knew that they never came on this fast. Which meant that she probably hit her head.
He couldn't believe that Dudley had been so focused on himself and his own enjoyment that he completely ignored that Paige was standing there and there was a lot more space to stick his ugly face (actually, he could believe it, but he was quite....angry). His friend was so vulnerable right now; he knew what these episodes did to her, once she was hit with one while rowing, fell into the water and couldn't swim to the surface- Harry had saved her.
The rage blinded him, and all of a sudden, he noticed Paige jerked, and when he looked up....the glass was gone.
The glass....was gone.
A new sequence of events happened quickly; Dudley fell into the water, and the snake slid out to the two.
"Thankss," He hissed.
Harry looked up from where he was trying to help Paige sit up. "Anytime," he said in slight surprise.
All of a sudden, Paige jerked again, and when Harry looked up, the glass had reappeared and Aunt Petunia was freaking out, since Dudley was still trapped in the exhibit.
"H-harry?" Paige asked, rubbing her temples. The pain was receding. "What just happened?"
"Dudley pushed you back," Harry told her. "I think you hit your head. You ok?"
Paige shook her head a little to clear it. "Yeah, just fine. I think it was the talking snake. I wasn't imagining that, right?"
Harry laughed. "No, you weren't. Then the glass disappeared and Dudley fell in. The snake came out and thanked me. Are you sure your alright? You looked like you were having a seizure,"
Paige looked at him strangely. "Are you sure your the one who should be asking me that? You just said a snake came out and thanked you," she rubbed her temples. "Then again, can't argue with you; I heard it to. I'm peachy, by the way,"
The two laughed, but neither could help but notice the way Harry's uncle was looking at them.....