The smuggest smile imaginable on her lips, Willow slowly shook her head, just before she chortled at a fuming man, “Nope, not gonna happen. You sneaked it past us, but you’re now the dependable guy in charge who takes care of everyone, and is totally trusted by them, with also fixing anybody’s problems--”
“I’ll blow it up to skyscraper size and hang it against the side of the castle for all of them there to see, if you don’t knock it off!” was then perplexedly blustered by a threatening Xander, his own face turning a deep, embarrassed scarlet as he started to hop up and down in his comical wrath.
She naturally had no idea what he was talking about, but it didn’t matter. Dashing forward, Willow stopped right in front of Xander, and the witch flung her arms around him in an eager embrace. Fortunately, she’d caught him when he was on the ground after his last hop. Feeling his chin now perched atop her head, just like old times, Willow heaved an immensely happy sigh. She became even more satisfied when the woman felt Xander’s own arms engulf her in his returned hug.
They stood there together in absolute contentment, until Xander at last wryly commented, “Okay, five more minutes, but that’s all. Are you still certain you can’t do anything
about the whole silly situation? I’m asking again, because right now my blabbermouth bunch out there must’ve for sure told those three human piñatas exactly what’ll happen to them in the next couple of books. Including just how four-eyes is gonna name one of his kids, though I bet he didn’t believe a single word of that.
From where her face was pressed up against Xander’s shirtfront in his hug, Willow sarcastically retorted, “Why not? It makes perfect sense; have the hero show his esteem for two men who either thoroughly manipulated or despised him, just so the writer could finish off with a happy ending and retire to count her loot. Seems fair to me. There’s nothing stopping you from doing it yourself, Xan. If you ever settle down with a nice girl and start producing little rugrats, I’m totally positive the first boy will be named Snyder Harris.”
Xander promptly guffawed at this first-rate comeback, shaking both his and Willow’s bodies in their ongoing embrace. He continued to rest his chin upon the witch’s head while she held onto him, fondly listening to her giggles. Only when the young woman calmed down a little did Xander try again. “Uh, Wils, what I said about fixing it-- There’s really no way?”
Willow just sighed, her breath tickling Xander’s chest through his shirt. She eventually confessed, “Definitely not today, Xan. Your visitors will be gone soon, and when they return to their home dimension, they’ll remember it all because that’s part of the spell, too. How they deal with it is up to them, but any changes that happen there won’t make any difference to the books and movies here. It all goes back to whatever Dawn and I did last night, whipping up such a muddled magical mess that I can’t even figure out where to start, much less stop it. I’ll keep trying in my spare time, but it looks like you’ll just have to warn people about what’ll happen here next year, and maybe afterwards.”
“Warn, hell!” Xander snorted. “My Slayers and their Watcher accomplices will probably be selling tickets to it!”
Several years later, this one-eyed man continued to grumpily lean against a tree trunk in the Cleveland Slayers House’s back yard. A very cynical Xander Harris contemplated the here-and-now accuracy of what he’d exasperatedly predicted back then against his better judgment, only to be proven absolutely correct.
Out on the rear lawn, there were a dozen people who’d paid good cash money for the opportunity to give a thorough walloping to some seriously obnoxious and/or idiotic individual having no idea of what was about to happen to them. These unfortunate beings, either human or otherwise, would any second now appear inside the steel nets from innumerable different dimensions possessing fictional characters from such popular culture as comic books, movies, computer games, and so much more. Just as it’d occurred every anniversary of when a still-mortified Key and Red Witch woke up without ever remembering how they’d instigated the local event known as Happy Piñata Day. Which in turn was now such a prized tradition that even an extremely aggravated person in charge had to allow his people’s participation in it.
Xander’s sour face abruptly altered into an unsettling expression of wicked enjoyment. In the end, he’d had his revenge upon those pair of kitchen wreckers, and it’d all been worth it. Even when it subsequently took him a few days to again walk normally. Uttering a throaty, hyena-like cackle, the Head of the Cleveland House was interrupted in this alarming laughter over his cherished Christmas memories by something then transpiring throughout the lawn.
Pausing to glower at the sudden mystical flash of light appearing around each of the steel nets, Xander wearily waited to see just who was going to show up this time--
In the very next second, the Sunnydale survivor’s annoyance changed into astonishment, and then strangely enough into actual delight. Something he hadn’t previously ever though possible. On the other hand, considering exactly who were those current captives in the nets gawking around at their new location, there wasn’t any problem for Xander to then happily declare, “Oh, this is going to be good!
Author’s Note: I did say at the very beginning of this story that I found myself more interesting in writing just how Happy Piñata Day came to be, rather than about any specific crossover characters who had the misfortune to be transported into this strange holiday as the main participants. So…drop me a review and list those who you
think would be the most entertaining people to be introduced to a good thumping by the Slayers and Watchers. If you get inspired enough to actually write something more lengthy about those luckless prisoners (perhaps their own take on just what’d happened to them), you could then mention this in your reviews, and I’ll open the story up for you to add that chapter or omake.
Thanks for reading!