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31 Never Was

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This story is No. 1 in the series "Thirty One". You may wish to read the series introduction first.

Summary: 31 things Xander never was.

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Multiple Crossings > Xander-Centered > Ficlet CollectionsLadyAvariceFR153218,57728168,9051 Oct 121 Nov 12Yes

CH 14: Kitty Green

CH 13 Costume: Remus Lupin from Harry Potter

"Uuuuuhhhhh, Xander?"


"Who are you supposed to be?"

"Dawn picked."

"Lost a bet?"


"New Scooby rule, no betting against the mini-terror."

Said terror came bouncing down the stairs in her own get up of a fitted woman's suit with a shoulder holster and fake Browning. The black curly wig looked a bit odd but then again, he was wearing a blonde one and had green contacts in.

At least she hadn't made him dress up like that one character. No one would have seen him until graduation, end of story!

He was NOT going to be seen in public with a long auburn wig and skin tight leather straps.



"My name isn't Xander ma'am. Who are you? And what's going on?"

Bright kitty-green eyes watched the mayhem, unsure as to whether he should shift. He couldn't feel any of his pard, or Anita. It took him a moment to realize the girl, ghost he realized, was muttering something about costumes.

"All right, explain to me while we run. For now…"

Willow couldn't help but gasp as the small but well built man became a much bigger, much stronger looking cat-man.

"Let's go."

She wasn't going to argue.

Three sets of eyes watched the scene in complete and utter disbelief.

Crouched on one of the stools was Cordelia, smiling and talking baby-talk to a half leopard creature that seemed perfectly happy to stay lounged out by her feet and let her lavish attention on his ears and back.


"Huh? Yeah Wills?"

"What are you doing?"

"Right now? Embracing the kitty. Man this feels good."

Cordelia had slowed down with the scratching behind his ears when she finally noticed the group. A motorcycle-worthy purr and a gentle rub against her hand and all was well in kitty-ville. Xander resembled nothing so much as a large pile of fluffy black kitty-goo.

Willow watched the two for a minute, blinked, and finally sighed.

"If you can't beat them…"

She walked over to the pair, plopped down on Xander's other side and started scratching along his side and back.

Xander's purr put hotrods to shame. Grinning goofily and more than happy to stay put he came to an important conclusion.

Ear-scritchies were better than Twinkies any day.

The kitty-green eyes were pretty cool, too.
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