I repeat, Joss Whedon and Marvel and Disney and Fox own Buffy and the Avengers, and anyone else I forgot to mention.
The Avengers sat at the long board room table glaring at General Fury. He brought them a tiny girl, barely out of high school holding a pink and red scythe almost as long as her whole body. He claimed she was going to help them. With what, Stark couldn’t fathom.
“Is she the new assistant, because I have say, Natasha has certain abilities that I don’t think you can replace, and a little on the thin side for my tastes.” He looked around the table and Natasha Romanoff smacked the man on the back of the head and he smiled at her.
“That’s what I mean, you know I like it rough, but if its drink orders you’re after I want a cappuccino, and might as well bring us a bottle of whiskey while you’re at it. You can handle that right, or are you too young to buy alcohol?”
Buffy smiled, she has encountered this kind or reaction enough times, and doesn’t feel the need to prove herself. In the past, she might have tossed him around for a while, but she has those kinds of urges under control now.
“Hop to it blondie, and leave the renaissance fair at home tomorrow, we use real weapons here, and you won’t need them for coffee runs. Well maybe in New York a giant axe might not be a bad idea.”
Maybe this guy needed to be taught a lesson, Buffy thought. She set down her scythe, and Dawn groaned.
“Buffy, don’t do it.”
“I don’t know what you mean, I wasn’t going to hurt him, maybe just throw him around for a while.”
“If you say one word about my name, I will sew your mouth shut with a bone I rip out of your pinky finger.”
“Where did you find her Fury? She seems a bit unbalanced.”
“Me!? Unbalanced, look at you, an old man picking on what you assume to be a defenseless young girl? How’s that not unbalanced?”
“Old? I thought my money and genius made up for these ruggedly handsome wrinkles?”
“If you’re all finished, could we discuss the Loki problem?”
“You mean Loki and his steroid brigade? Where did he pick up those chicks? Did you see the way they tossed around the Captain, like he was a stuffed toy?”
“Too bad we didn’t have Banner, he would have destroyed them.”
“There will be no destroying of the girls, at least not until we have a chance to break the spell Loki has on them, and try to talk them down. The girls are mine, and I will deal with them.”
“Who are you?”
Fury finally stepped in. “She is the only one among us that has killed a God before. She has agreed to help us with the girls and Loki where possible. Last time it took the Avengers days to finally come together and take out Loki and look what we lost. The Chitauri laid waste to half of New York, thousands died, and the government tried to nuke Manhattan. Can we please try to avoid destroying the other half of New York?”
The Avengers looked sheepish, but defiant.
“We had no idea what Loki was planning, we stopped them didn’t we?” They erupted in argument then. Fury sighing and the Avengers both old and new pointing fingers at each other. Their alliance after the war on the Chitauri crumbling.
“So Furry, why would he go after slayers? I mean those Chitchat guys seem to be pretty effective destructo demons.” The arguing stopped and the team actually looked interested in his response.
“Because Loki does not have control of the Bitfrost, he doesn’t have his weapon anymore, and so he also doesn’t have the ability to create and control an army as easily as before, but he is still a very powerful magician. They are the strongest allies he can control at the moment.”
“That’s maybe something we can deal with too. Dawn, call Will. I want you two to look into binding his power like Willow did with that evil Santa look alike, and find out if she has located the slayers yet.”
“Ok, but I can tell you right now that Willow cannot bind the powers of a god, at least not for long.” She stepped out of the room to make the call.
“You brought us witches Fury?” Captain America was clearly uncomfortable. War he understood, science he could follow, but magic was something they all feared. It was unpredictable and uncontrollable.
“No, I brought you a team of people that can work together. I brought you the slayer general and her army. Now stop bickering, and get to work. Stark, I assume you already have all the intelligence we have on your computer, why don’t you all play nice, and come up with a plan of attack?” Fury walked out of the room.
“Hey Furry, keep an eye on Dawn will you? She always manages to get captured by something and I don’t think we have time to play rescue rangers.”
The group burst into laughter.
When the laughter died down, Buffy looked at the group again. “I can’t believe you made fun of my scythe. Look at your costumes and what’s up with invisible girl?”
The girl in question became visible at the end of the table. “How did you know I was there?” Gasps from the other heroes made it apparent that they were not made aware of her before the meeting.
“You’re not the first invisible girl I’ve met, and I can still hear you breathing and shuffling, I mean when you hit your knee on the table leg I thought for sure the others would say something.”
“You can hear her breathing?”
Buffy shrugged, “I’m the slayer, I can hear a lot better than most people.” Before another one of the freaks at the table could interrupt her she quickly looked at Faith and said, “So who are you supposed to be?” She recognized her when she first came into the room, but decided that Faith deserved her freedom. She disappeared shortly after the council was reformed, and kept in contact sporadically. When Willow wanted to check up on her, Buffy put a stop to it. “She deserves her freedom Will, and unless she starts causing problems, I’m not going to sneak around behind her back. Call her if you want to find out what’s up, her number is in my office.”
“So what’s up with the Lord of the Rings hand print on your face?”
“It’s all the costume I’m willing to wear.”
“She’s not the real Echo.”
“I’m all the Echo the Avengers need Stark.”
“So who are the rest of you?”
“I am Natasha and this is Clint.” Clint nodded to Buffy.
“Wicked bow. Let me play with it later?” Stark started laughing again, and Buffy glared at him.
“Sure, there is a range just outside the city.”
“I am Spiderman, this is Dr. Banner, and fluffy over there is Logan.” Logan growled, “I told you to stop calling me that Spider Boy, or I’ll squash you.”
“Why does Dr. Banner sound familiar? Did you publish a paper on teleportation last year?”
The doctor appeared shocked. “Yes, I experimented with teleportation. That paper was only released to a limited number of scientists, are you connected to Bannertech?”
“Nah, but my friend is very interested in teleportation, and she reads all your stuff.”
“How does she get ahold of it?”
Buffy shrugged, “She’s a witch.”
Dawn came into the room then. “Buffy, Willow says the slayers are holed up in an old subway tunnel, she’s sending the coordinates, and they are working on breaking the spell Loki has on them, but she says not to count on binding Loki. She’s on her way though, so maybe she can help with fighting him.”
“Thanks Dawn, did she say when she’d be here?”
“Already here Buff.” Willow slipped through the door with a dizzy Xander.
“I told you to warn me before you pull me through your body sucking portal. Whoa.” He looked around at the superheroes sitting around the table in awe.
“Uh, Xander, watch the drool factor.”
“Dr. Banner! Oh my God I’ve read all your theories and papers, I have so many questions. I tried to recreate the teleportation device without magic, but I don’t know what your power source is. You didn’t mention it in the paper, and I stumbled across your original paper on the effects of gamma radiation, fascinating stuff, do you really turn into a giant green rage monster?”
“Breathe Will. There will be plenty of time after we take down the big bad to question Dr. Banner. Dawn says you have beat on their location. We need to come up with a game plan. Can anyone tell me what Loki wants? Or how to defeat him?”
“He means to rule this world.”
“Well yeah, that's what they all want, what else does he want, and who are you?”
“I am Thor Odinson of Asgard, and Loki’s brother.”
“Of course you are, nice hammer, I had one like that once. So can he be killed?”
“We will not be killing Loki.”
“Ok, so blondie says we can’t kill her minions, and Thor says we can’t kill Loki, so what kind so are we just gona ask them to play nice, and hope it works?”
“That’s Echo.” Buffy quickly interjected. “She looks a lot like someone we know, doesn’t she Xander?” She elbowed him and he nodded. “Yeah, like you could be sisters.”
“Will, have you figured out a way to stop the mind control?”
“Yeah, but I need to be in the same room at least. It’s a powerful spell, but it doesn’t have distance.”
“What if it doesn’t work, or it turns out they are there willingly fighting with Loki?”
“I will bring the New York team with us, or what’s left of it, and if they won’t listen to reason we sort of have a way of binding their power. How did you stop Loki last time?”
“The Hulk made him an offer he couldn’t refuse.” Everyone turned to Xander. “I’ve always wanted to say that.”
“So, you can hurt him? What are his powers like?”
“He is a God Buff, he is basically like you and Will combined, but with even more defenses, healing power, and strength. Plus he’s got that trickster thing going for him.”
“This is all well and good, but can someone please tell me who you and your merry band of nerds are, and what the hell is a slayer?”
“I thought we cleared all that up already. I am the slayer, Buffy the vampire slayer, general, and this is Willow, Xander, and my sister Dawn. Slayers are special girls given super strength to fight evil, and forever doomed to have demon blood stains on her favorite jeans.”
“Why didn’t we know about you before? You talk like you are a general of an army, so how strong is your army?”
“Because before a couple of years ago there was only one slayer at a time, and her identity was kept secret for her protection. You know evil sort of likes to take out the good guys. Now there are about two thousand of us, thanks to Will here.”
“Yes vampires, that’s the title, but we fight all kinds of demons.”
“You can’t be serious? You lead an army of girls against Dracula, Lestat?”
“Uh, I wouldn’t test her, Buffy looks small, but she packs a big punch.”
“No, Xander its ok, let him test me. They aren’t going to follow me if they don’t know why they should, and Dracula isn’t dead, slippery vampire has too many tricks up his sleeves, but I have killed several Lestats, and even a few Edwards. Those are the most satisfying. What girl honestly thinks stalking is sexy?”
“Follow you? I think you missed the part about us being the Avengers.”
“And I think you missed the General part of my title, so step in line old man.” Stark stood up and stormed out of the room.
“So Willow, where is their hideout? Let’s come up with a game plan.” She turned back to the conference table, “I don’t know what you can do, and that’s not ok, so let’s find a place where you can show me your talents.”
“I’ll show you mine if you show me yours.” Wolverine was beginning to like the girl. At least she could drive Stark out of his own boardroom.
“Yeah, we will need a little practice working together. I’m gonna call Lizzy and get the New York slayers here. Where can we spar and not hurt the building?”
“I know a place, under the city and not far from here.” Spiderman had already met a few slayers, but he didn’t know there were so many. He was curious to see how they fought as a team.
“Ok, but I don’t want it anywhere near Loki or the slayers. I don’t want them to know we are close. Will compare notes with Spiderman on locations.”
“Oh my God Buff, are you going to put a costume on for this, I mean Faith looks mostly like Faith, but that Echo paint thing, and the arm bands, it’s like every teenage boys fantasy.”
“And you are still a teenage boy aren’t you? Gross Xander and you know I do not wear a costume.”
“It’s no sweat B, they know I’m not the real Echo, I just didn’t tell them I was a slayer yet.”
“Sorry Faith, I tried.”
“Like I said, Five by five. I knew this gig wouldn’t last forever.”
“Dr. Banner, would you mind helping me with something? You aren’t going to spar with them are you?” Willow asked.
“No, but I would like to see what they can do. I probably shouldn’t go on this mission, but if Loki gets away, perhaps I will try to help. What do you need?”
“Do you have a lab we could work in? This spell is sort of delicate, and I need lab supplies.”
“Of course, perhaps you can explain magic to me.”
“It’s basically chemistry and physics, but there is that other element, let’s go to the lab and I’ll explain.”
They walked off the rest of the team prepared to leave for the tunnels.
“Does Willow and Dr. Banner aka the Hulk working together make anyone else a little nervous?” Xander followed the two with his eyes until they disappeared into the elevator. “That can’t be good.”
Next up, the slayers and avengers take on Loki and the rogue slayers.
Thanks for the reviews.