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Buffy V. The Avengers

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Summary: Buffy is approached by Fury to help to Avengers with their god problems.

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Marvel Universe > AvengersSSanchezFR18819,64024330,67015 Dec 1228 Apr 13No

Buffy meets Batman

Buffy belongs to Joss Whedon, Marvel owns the Avengers, and Batman is DC. I wont be crossing Batman with this story a lot, or I don't plan on it. It will primarily be Avengers and Buffy. I think after this chapter I might try for less fluff, more story. Who knows? I've never written fanfiction before, so I don't know exactly how this will turn out. Thanks for the reviews.



“Hey Xander?”

“Yeah?”

“I’m gona go the Gotham and threaten Batman, want to come?”

“Best apocalypse ever.”

“Don’t get too nerdy. I actually want to scare him, and it’s harder to threaten someone when you’re defending her.”

“Hey, you were gona punch Rogue, I was saving your life more than defending hers. If you paid me any attention, you’d know she can absorb your powers.”

“It would have been worth it. Did you hear what she said about me?! Whatever, we are going to see Batboy and I know he doesn’t have any special abilities. So no interrupting my taunts and I’m gona go heavy on the disapproval face and if that doesn’t work, Will has been teaching me how to be more affective with my resolve face.”

“Run and hide evil enemies, the slayer is working on her resolve face.”

“Hey, he is supposed to be one of the good guys right? I don’t want to put him in the hospital, just inspire a little fear.”

“I thought Faith was going to go with you?”

“She had a late night with Wolverine. That guy is the surliest man I have met in a long time, but he and Faith were a good team. She wasn’t kidding about arachnophobia, that guy is quick, and when he gets his webbing around you, that stuff is strong. Have you ever seen anything like it?”

“Andrew is going to freak out when I tell him about this conversation. He’s gona hit you when I say you called the Hulk Godzilla, but he’s going to be jealous for a long time.”

“Let’s get back to the webbing. I managed to swipe some and I was hoping you’d help me analyze it. Unless you already know what it is.”

“No, his comic books are vague, but Spiderman is said to have developed it himself, so it can’t be that complicated. I will send it to the lab, and see what we come up with.”

“Thanks Xander, so do you think someone has a car we can borrow?”

“Stark probably has a few, but I doubt he’d let you drive them.”

“Hey, I’m a lot better than I used to be! I was hoping you’d drive.”



“What is this thing?”

“It’s a government car Buff. Fury let us borrow it.”

“I feel so secret agent or mafia with these tinted windows. Too bad they don’t have bond cars. I want one with secret weapons and cars that turn into boats.”

“That’s a scary thought Buffy.”

“How far is Gotham from New York?”

“Not far we should get there just about the time it gets dark.”

“I think we should lure him to us. I don’t want to chase him around the city, let’s just use his bat light and he will come to us, won’t he?”

“I’m surprised Buff, you seem to know a lot about Batman.”

“Well he has more movies than the rest of them.”

“It’s weird isn’t it? To have movies and comic books made of your life. Imagine if we had a reality show about Sunnydale?”

“God who would watch that?”

“You watch Batman movies, who wouldn’t want to see a hot girl killing vampires with her adorable boyfriend Xander and a super witch?”

“Har, har, that wouldn’t be a good idea. You guys could protect yourselves most of the time, but imagine if we had to protect camera men or women? They would die and with the vampire obsession this country has, we would probably be painted as the enemy.”

“Yeah, but Andrew and a few of the slayers are working on a pretty awesome comic book, you should check it out.”

“Maybe I will, but no publishing unless the council votes on it. We can’t put our girls in danger unless they agree to it.”

“You know it could be sold as fiction. There are a lot of comic books that are merely stories, but we wont publish anything unless the council agrees to it. So are you going to tell me about your date last night.”

“Only if you promise not to drool.”

“I don’t drool.”

“You kinda do.”

“Tell me.”

“He’s got that quiet doctor thing down, but he’s also very funny and he treats me like a woman, not a weakling. He likes pizza and purple shirts and he has that walk, you know when confident men walk and think at the same time, and never crash into anything.”

“I used to practice that walk all the time, never mastered it, but Will has the quiet doctor walk down, but she still crashes into stuff.”

“I really don’t know him that well, but I’d like to. Whoa, is that Gotham?”



“What if he’s on vacation?”

“He’ll be here, we used the signal. He can’t resist the signal.”

Buffy rolled her eyes, but she could hear someone climbing a latter, and pushed Xander into the shadows.

“Who are you?”

“I’m Buffy.”

“Why did you use the signal?” His voice was gruff, and she though he sounded old, but his body still looked strong, although it could have been the costume. Who knows if he had the abs underneath to match?

“We have things to discuss.”

“Like what?”

“Like you kidnapping one of my slayers!”

“Your slayers? What is a slayer?”

“I’ll show you if you don’t leave them alone.” Her voice hardened and she glared at him. “Look, I know you have your bat costume mystique going on, but slayers are here to kill vampires and demons, not to bother with human problems. If you so much as lay a finger on any one of my girls again, I will personally come back to this city and clip your wings, got it Batboy?”

“You can just come to my city and threaten me!”

“Isn’t that what I just did? Xander, didn’t I just threaten the bat geezer?”

“It sounded like a threat to me.”

“I didn’t want to hurt your slayers. I just wanted to find out what they are. They showed up, unannounced in my city and started turning people into dust. I tried to talk to them, but they always got away from me, so I set a trap, and caught one. Interesting DNA she has too, but that’s all I got from her, she escaped before I could even question her.”

“I want that sample, and I want that information destroyed.”

“How are they turning people to dust?”

“They are killing vampires, not people you idiot. Havent you watched them stake one, in the heart?”

“Why didn’t they tell me that?”

“They don’t answer to you.”

“Who do they answer to?”

“Me.”

“You should have contacted me before you put slayers in my city.”

“It’s not your city, and these girls live here, born and raised. Now they have the power to defend their homes. I didn’t send them anywhere, they wanted to be here.”

“Why wouldn’t they talk to me?”

“Would you have listened? You thought they were killing people.”

Batman’s cape fluttered around him and Buffy shivered.

“Can I ask you a personal question?”

He nodded.

“Why the cape? The costume looks like it would be a good defensive weapon for normal people like you, but the cape?”

He smiled at her, and leapt off the building. Buffy ran to the side and watched him glide gently to the ground.

“Damn that was cool.”

“Do you think we made our point?”

“Yeah, but we have some blood samples to destroy. Do you want me to call Willow?”

“Not unless we have to. She’s still at Stark Tower with Bruce and Tony. They are having some kind of nerd build a thon in the research and development department.”

“So back to the batcave Robyn?”

“Yeah Bat girl, high ho silver, away.”

“Why do I have to be Batgirl?”

“Because you called me Robyn, and who else would you be?”

“Yeah, that wasn’t cool, but I could totally pull off the Joker.”

“Don’t kid yourself, maybe you could pull of Jason Todd as Robyn.”

“Hey, I don’t want to be one of the worst portrayals of Robyn, and I would never come back as Red Hood! And still turned on by this conversation.”

“Xander!”

“What? You had to know that if we talked comic books I would get excited. I never knew you were into Batman.”

“Well I’m not, really, but he does have cool toys.”

“Yeah, so let’s sneak into the cave and steal something cool.”



They snuck through the cave, Xander making military hand signals, and Buffy rolling her eyes as they snuck up to the secret lair part of the cave.

“Shh, he’ll hear you.”

“It’s only Alfred.”

“Really? I always wanted an Alfred.”

“You totally have an Alfred, you have Giles.”

“True, but Alfred doesn’t sputter and polish his glasses all the time. He’s calm and collected.”

“And he can hear you quite clearly from this distance.”

Buffy and Xander stood up and walked over to Alfred.

“Sorry about that, we came to collect the blood samples Batman took from Charlotte.”

“Yeah, hand it over old man, or Buffy is gona mess you up.”

“Xander!”

“Master Wayne has already called. The blood has been destroyed and we do not have any information stored on computers or paper files. I have destroyed the data.”

“Excuse us if we don’t believe you, but we’d like to have a look around.”

“Xander, they are the good guys, and now that they know we are too, I doubt they will be causing us any more problems, especially since they know I can have Willow erase their memories with one phone call.” She was looking at Alfred as she said it, only a slight edge to her voice, but the threat was clear.

Alfred nodded. “Master Bruce has asked you to dine with us. If you’ll join us, I believe he is getting cleaned up. We will eat in an hour, would you like a tour?”

“I think I’ve died and gone to heaven, can we take the elevator up to the piano room?”

“Of course Mister Harris.”

“Hey Buffy.” Xander whispered.

“Yeah Xander?”

“Can Willow really erase his memory from New York?”

“Nah, but he doesn’t know that.”

Alfred smiled and led them into the elevator.
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