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Sunnydale Cylons, and their Toaster Lovers.

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Summary: My First attempt at multi chapter story, answering the Ship of the Line Challenge. Xander and Cordelia choose nBSG costumes.

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Stargate > General > General: SG-1
Television > Battlestar Galactica
AbsenceFR182179,2293122895,45519 Jan 1311 Feb 13No

1:The players

Disclaimer: This is a work of Fan Fiction, I make no claims to the Ownership of either BtVS, Stargate, or NBSG. Both belong to their creators.

A/N 'speech' Caprican

"Speech" English

Flight Lieutenant Karl ‘Helo’ Agathon looked around the street he had just found himself on with wild eyes. The last thing he could remember was backing away from Raptor to give Boomer covering fire while she lifted off and tried to make for safety. Now he found himself in the middle of a street, at night. Quickly drawing his service weapon he looked around and tried to place where he was. It looked like one of the seedier sections of Geminon… that could be a problem. Some of those ultra religious enclaves even refused to use Caprican, preferring to stick to the more ‘pure’ Gemonese a language he didn’t speak. Considering the red head that was currently yelling at him in another language he would have to assume that his guess was right.

‘What the Frak, ‘ Helo muttered to himself, ignoring the red head and scanning the street. It certainly looked like one of those backwards, religious communities. The only problem was that it seemed to be filled with things out of myth. ‘Maybe this whole thing is a fleet stress test and the bombardment didn’t happen. ‘

One of the smaller mythical creatures charged him. Karl might not be the smartest person around but he had done a stint as the weapons officer on one of the cruisers that supported the battle line before being promoted to EO officer for a Raptor squadron, not to mention that he had served his mandatory two in the Colonial Marines. He was a decisive man by nature and his training had only honed that to a fine edge. So he did the logical thing and shot the attacker. For some reason that upset the red head in front of him, but for now he could ignore it. She was a civilian; civilians were always getting upset after they got the marines called down on their asses. Look at how the Picon teachers strike had turned out.

He allowed his mind to wander as he scanned the area again. It seemed like the sound of his service weapon going off had cleared the area, giving him time to think. So, if this is all a training scenario… or a psychotic break, a small voice whispered in the back of his mind, what should I do. Okay first things first, I need to see if there are any other fleet personnel in the area and rally. Nodding to himself he pulled his short-range radio off his belt and brought it to his lips.

‘Any fleet personnel in the area, this is Flight Lieutenant Agathon off the Galactica, please report position and status, ‘ Helo spoke calmly, as he had been trained to do. Little did he know that at that moment the universe twisted to accommodate his desire. Ethan had taken offence to Cordelia’s highhanded ways and imbued both costumes with more then their fair share of the catalyst potion for tonight’s spell, so they affected the world around them much more chaotically. What Helo’s call did was throw open the doors between realities and suck a Raptor in to answer his call.

‘Helo, Athena, I have your beacon and am five minutes out, clear the area and prepare for evac, ‘ a tinny voice that sounded a lot like Boomer’s came out of his radio. Helo just nodded and scanned the street, making sure that the Raptor would fit.

‘Athena, Helo, sight secure for the moment. Any clue what the frak is going on? ‘

‘Negative Helo, I was just launching another survey off the Galactica when this happened… Oh Frak, keep your fraking head down Helo; I have a heavy raider inbound on my tail! This is going to be touch and go. ‘

‘Roger that’ Helo scanned the sky and could see the two ships plummeting towards the ground. He was slightly surprised that the Raider wasn’t shooting at the Raptor. Mentally he began to run trajectories in his head as he backed away from the center of the street. From what he could tell the Heavy Raider was aiming for the other side of town. He just hoped that it didn’t have a full compliment of centurions… the Marines would have one Hades of a time digging them out of this built up of an area. Of course it could be worse, at least it wasn’t launching nukes. Perhaps he had gotten caught up in some weird temporal spatial anomaly? He shook off his confusion as the Raptor set down and the gull wing doors opened.

Just as the doors began to open he sprinted for them. If Centurions were unloading on the ground he had no intention of being here. Especially since he was only armed with his side arm. If he had an assault rifle and some explosives he might, might, think about trying to thin them out a bit. Not in his current situation. He swung into the Raptor and slammed the door shut behind him, absentmindedly checking the seal. He was very glad to see that the EO slot had a helmet sitting on the seat since he had lost his own somewhere along the line. He threw it on, plugged in the leads, and toggled the intercom.

‘In and sealed, anyone else on the air? ‘

‘Lots of chatter, it sounds like pre attack Caprica out there, but its not in any language that I recognize. You have any clue what the frak is going on here Helo? ‘

‘No fraking clue, one minute I’m covering Boomer as she lifted off with a load of refugees and the next I’m standing in the middle of a street. ‘ Helo spun up the Dradis monitor and began to review the records of the flight. ‘This is… weird. ‘

‘What is? ‘

‘Your Dradis goes from being part of a fleet to being in the upper atmosphere… no discontinuity, no jump. ‘ Helo bent over his boards and began to look at the system particulars. ‘You got a map of local space when you came out… looks like a hell of a lot of ships out there…’

‘Anything of ours? ‘

‘The… that can’t be right…’

‘Helo, talk to me! ‘

‘Looks like the Atlantia, it’s hanging out in high orbit…’

‘The Atlantia? The Atlantia was destroyed over Picon… Helo, are you sure you’re not seeing things? ‘

‘Check it yourself! ‘

‘Can you plot me a jump? I really don’t want to make a dash for it with a Heavy Raider in the area. ‘

‘Can do Athena, Plotting now…’ Helo quickly began running calculations through his system. ‘Coordinates set, jump on your mark. ‘

‘MARK! ‘

The feeling of a jump, especially any jump initiated from inner atmosphere is indescribable. You feel like your stretching beyond what the human body was designed for, and then instantly you’re being compressed down to a smaller size in your stretched state. Thankfully it’s a sensation that lasts for less then a second, though the after effects linger for a couple seconds after you jump. There is a reason why jumping into atmosphere or low orbit is not recommended after all.

‘Helo, you had better get up here and take a look at this…’ Athena’s soft voice came over the intercom. Helo could feel the fear creeping into her tone ever over the intercom. That more then anything got him moving. Colonial pilots do not show their fear ever, they’re trained not to. Even during the attack on the Colonies none of the pilots had the raw fear in their voice that Athena was displaying.

What he saw when he got to the front of the Raptor made his jaw drop. The Atlantia was in front of them as it should be, but it wasn’t the only ship. There were two weird saucer shaped ships, he had never seen a design anything like them before. Another ship looked like a flying wedge, bigger then a Battlestar. There was also a lethal looking cruiser marked with a red box with a circle punched out and a triangle through it, and something that looked vaguely like a bird of prey.

‘Frak me…’ was Helo’s only comment as he stared wide-eyed out the view screen. ‘Do you recognize any of those ships? ‘

‘No… I’ve never seen anything like them before…’ Helo turned to Athena and got his first look at her. She looked just like Boomer, he could have sworn she was his old pilots twin sister. Helo knew that there wasn’t anyone on Galactica who looked like that but given what she had said… Well things were screwy enough that he had no intentions of commenting on it.

‘Frak it, we have clearance from Atlantia? ‘

‘No, it’s a dead ship… Automatics are working but that’s about it…’

‘Is it enough to get us onboard? Their rad shielding might have failed. ‘ Helo shuddered as he considered that horrific possibility. ‘If so then the ship might be in good shape even if everyone is dead onboard. With a Heavy Raider out there and active I want some armour between me and any nukes that go flying. ‘

‘You can say that again…’ Athena snorted. ‘I can probably confuse an attack but… it would be difficult. Automatics are responding… letting them have control. ‘

Silently the two colonial pilots watched as they were pulled into the dead Battlestar. It did have power, but so far they hadn’t seen any other signs of life. Neither of them wanted to think about what they would see once they finally got onboard. It wouldn’t be pretty, if their guess was correct. Still, if the ship were in working order it would give them a sense of comfort. Being on a Battlestar was very much like coming home for both of them. After all as officers of the colonial fleet they had spent the majority of their time working and living on ships rather then being on the ground.

‘So, Helo, the last thing you remember is letting Boomer fly off on Caprica… Do you remember any of the flight? New Circe? Anything after that? ‘ Athena asked with a strain in her voice that Helo couldn’t identify.


‘Frak… My fraking husband has amnesia…’ Athena whispered almost too softly to hear.

‘I’m assuming that we got married after I got off Caprica…’ Helo frowned and concentrated hard. ‘Was anyone in the fleet you were with working on a new type of drive, or were the drives in bad shape? ‘

‘All of the drives were fraked; a couple of the engineers would have been working on jury-rigged patches… Why? Do you think that has something to do with this? ‘

‘The story of the Hermes Chariot…’ Helo gathered his thoughts together and sank back into the co-pilots chair. ‘What do you know about the beginning of the first Cylon war? ‘

‘Ummm… Cylons revolted, mass death and destruction… all that jazz. ‘

‘Have you ever wondered just why Virgon made out as well as it did in that war? I mean it’s a piss poor agricultural planet. Anyway, story goes that at the end of the first war the Hermes Chariot, an experimental ship, jumped in Virgon’s orbit and disappeared. The only thing is that the Hermes Chariot was listed as an auxiliary cruiser throughout most of the first war, until it was destroyed in the second battle of Picon. ‘ Helo frowned as he sorted through the rest of the space story. ‘Here's the other thing, President Xerxes of Virgon, Xerxes the Great? Some nut ball got a hold of his DNA and ran a trace looking to find out if he was related. He supposedly found that the DNA matched a captain in the Virgonian ground forces… an exact match, and that captain disappeared the day the Hermes Chariot jumped. ‘

‘So you think a hyper mishap threw us in time? ‘ Athena’s skepticism was blatantly obvious.

‘It’s a possibility… I mean going from day to night in the blink of an eye? Something weird is going on. So far the three theories I have are hyper mishap, stress testing of the sadistic kind using illegal VR holobands, or I’ve had a psychotic break. ‘ Helo said with a touch of bitter humor.

‘You have a warped mind, anyone tell you that? ‘

‘Yeah, Starbuck, every five fraking minutes. ‘ Helo looked around and saw that they were now inside of the hanger bay. ‘We’re here… Atmosphere looks good, Geiger counter is clear. No residual radiation detected. We have anything heavier then side arms for while we explore? I would hate to run into some Centurions without some heavier firepower. ‘

‘In the back, we’ve got a full weapons rack, ‘ Athena said as she double-checked the atmosphere. Helo headed to the back and came back to hand her an assault rifle.

‘Lets go. ‘

Caprica Six strode down the street in the middle of her phalanx of Centurions. Right now she was very, very, confused. First she had been whisked off the bridge of her base star in the middle of their jump away from earth, and now she was on a primitive planet with strange creatures and humans. To make matters worse Baltar, the one she had been seeing since she was revived after the attack on Caprica had started screaming when she arrived. He had then gone into an incoherent rant about how the cycle was broken and this had never happened before. That had frightened her enough to call out on the net for some Centurions.

Much to her relief they had come, and they were part of the renegade faction not the ones that the one line had lobotomized. In Six’s mind that was a very good thing since she needed the increased computing power to decipher the strange language that these humans seemed to use. So far none of them had spoken any of the languages of the colonies, or any other language in her or the Centurions data banks. Surveying the surrounding terrain she was reminded of a more primitive suburban Caprica. It was almost like the neighborhood that she had lived in with Baltar before the attack.

Speaking of Baltar his ramblings had changed. Now he was speaking about the one, but seemed disconsolate that the one wasn’t one anymore and that cycle had been broken. Silently Six narrowed her eyes. She had never really thought about head Baltar, not deeply at least, but from the way he was carrying on it seemed that he believed it to be his job to make people conform to these cycles he talked about. That was a very uncomfortable thought. Was he a messenger from god, one sent to enforce changes at his own discretion? If so, did she want to continue to follow him?

Since Caprica her life had been one disaster after another. Most of those disasters had been either prompted by, or in reaction to something that the being had said. Assuming that he wasn’t a part of her subconscious… Six’s as a model had never been overly religious, not like the threes or the twos, but they did have access to the religious database. She silently dove that data stream in an attempt to discover if there were banishing words or rituals. Not finding anything she went back to ignoring him. Especially since one of the Centurions reported that there was a dead body advancing in pursuit of a women.

With frightening speed she consulted with the Centurions and with the Heavy Raiders computer. It seemed that most of the beings they had encountered tonight read as alive, even the strange ones with the weird energy field showed as alive. Six bit her lip as she tried to make a decision. She wasn’t a combat leader and she knew it, she was an experienced diplomat and politician. Finally she came to a decision. Mentally she ordered one Centurion to detain the girl, while the others took out the dead body by any means necessary.

What happened next shocked her. The body didn’t die until the lead Centurion took its head off. Bullets were ineffective against it. If there were more of them then she would have to rely on the slow hand-to-hand fighting of the Centurions, since her own pistol would be useless. With that she made another snap decision. She was getting back into her Heavy Raider, with the Centurions, and getting into the comfort of the black. This planet bound shit was for the birds.

Then Baltar started screaming in rage. Ranting about her fucking up the champions test, further destroying the cycle. The most frightening thing he said was that she had single handily prevented the flood and rebirth of this dimension. That word caught her flatfooted. She was in another dimension? If so… she wanted off this rock and wanted room to think before even worse things happened. Ignoring the Centurion with the girl slung over its shoulder she led the small column back to the raider. Hopefully things would be saner in space.
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