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Badass Valentine's Day

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This story is No. 4 in the series "A Badass Family". You may wish to read the series introduction and the preceeding stories first.

Summary: So the lovely couples want nothing more than to enjoy Valentine's day. Too bad no one told Doom and his Vampire lackey's!

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Marvel Universe > AvengershellbellsFR151977082,86214 Feb 1314 Feb 13Yes
Disclaimer I do not own the characters - I only own my twisted imagination.



Roses are Red,
Violets are blue
and new weapons
say honey I love you.


Buffy was use to being treated as a daughter, a slayer, a warrior or even a Lady but never really a women. It was nice. She couldn’t believe just how much she’d grown to love Tony. They were real and loved so passionately, neither willing to settle for the shields that the rest of the world saw in regards to them. In their apartment they were not warrior general or eccentric billionaire but rather Tony and Buffy. It was a small distinction but one that had made a massive difference.

Today was Valentine’s day. The day where lovers celebrated and the Avengers were no exception. Steve had started early taking Faith out early for a horse-ride around the city and planned to treat Faith like a precious lady - he was the only one he could get away with it. Buffy and Tony were having a simpler day. It started with a lazy awakening and sex that was unbecoming of a lady of Buffy’s stature which just made it hotter.

Buffy got up naked as the day as she was born and picked up her short silk robe. “So Happy Valentine’s day babe.”

Tony was watching in awe at the blonde goddess that for some reason had decided he was good enough. He was not stupid enough to run away or push her away in some misguided notion of doing the right thing. His starring made her blush was ironic considering just what they’d gotten up to in their bed. Who knew what could make people self-conscious these days?

She flushed, “Just thinking I’m a lucky dirty old man.”

Buffy rolled her eyes, she hated when Tony started down this path, and really? He was playing the old man card - he’d forgotten who her exes were. She stalked over him, a little bit of the slayer speaking out, wanting to make sure her mate wasn’t being stupid. “You are my fiancée - not some dirty old man. Besides please you don’t have anything on Angel or Spike.”

Buffy internally grinned, seeing the jealous look that crossed Tony’s face, which was perfect it was what she’d been aiming for. She asked innocently as she could manage, as it was a grin she’d learnt off Faith - not very, “Is something wrong Ton’?”

“You’re in bed with your fiancé - and you talk about your exes.” He started to pout and added, “I’m doing something wrong.”

She smirked, mischief alight in her eyes, “Yep. Gonna do something about it?”

He did, and thus round two of Valentine’s Day started. Just after midday JARVIS interrupted proceedings and sounded a little sheepish. After all, he loved the changes he’d seen in his master since he’d become serious with Buffy. “I’m afraid there is a situation that needs your attention.”

Buffy sighed, “Of course there is. What’s the what?”

“I’m afraid Dr Doom is in Manhattan with Vampire lackeys.”

The couple shared a look and a shared, “Huh?”

Well at least it was something different. It wouldn’t matter Doom was going down; they were having lobster and a triple chocolate torte cake.

Buffy pouted, “I want him to be scrap metal.”

Tony chuckled, “Oh sweet I’ll turn him into a metal cube just for you.”

He kissed her cheek, and handed her a new crossbow - it was awesome. The main reason for its beauty was the fact that it could handle flaming arrows – her favourite.



On the rare occasions that they prey overlapped - the Avengers and the Slayers had a well worked routine. The Slayers went to work on the supernatural creatures while the Avengers dealt with the Meta’s. Buffy and Faith saw the thirty strong group of vampires and whined - none of them were more than a year old. Still they would be cautious as they were not the oldest slayers in history by being stupid.

It was not a challenge. In fact the only good part of the evening was that Buffy tried out her flaming arrows. What do you know? You can make a vampire actually explode if you smack a flaming arrow right into their heart. Faith was having a whale of a time with her new sword. It was rather sweet in a way - Faith and Steve now had a matching his and hers shield and sword. It was the ultimate couple thing done Avengers style.

The women done with their task wandered over to see the final parts of the Doom confrontation. Hulk took exception to his comment about being stupid and showed his displeasure. It was brilliant, Hulk whipped him back and forth in an arc over his head before slamming him down in the asphalt. Given the noises he was making the team assumed he was dazed. It was rather hard to tell with his frozen metal features. Clint being the gentle old soul that he was leaned right over, “Piece of advice. Find someone else - Reed chose Sue. Get over it and for god’s sake let us finish Valentine’s Day in style.”

“Amen,” was all Hulk said.

“Here, here,” was Natasha’s addition but you sensed that she was scanning for a weakness to kill Doom.”

“Oh yeah I want to say thank you for my sword.”
Buffy smacked Tony’s head before he could say something that would make Steve blush.

She wanted to get back to her own Valentine’s day, “Can we go home now.”

Home was a good word, and one that now truly fit the Avengers Tower for all of them. And as far as the Avengers were concerned - Weapons might not be traditional present for Valentine’s day but it worked.

Roses are Red,
Violets are blue
and new weapons
say honey I love you.

The End

You have reached the end of "Badass Valentine's Day". This story is complete.

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