Disclaimer: I do not own Buffy or Angel. Nor I own Stargate, cause if I did Sam and Jack would be married by now. The Dukes of Hazard: The original series (not that crappy movie), yeah, don't own them and fudged time line. Brought 'em up to this time frame. M.A.S.H., well only used one character from that show but don't own it either. Highlander, that's right, don't own 'em either, but loved the way the show was done. Pretty much ignoring the Immortal Movies. So! Doing this for fun, not profit. I subsist on reviews and rates!
The orange Dodge Charger easily pulled into the parking lot backing into a specific spot in the early afternoon hours. It's thrumming engine roared once before ceasing its operation. Two men exited the vehicle wore work boots, work jeans, and rough plaid work shirts. The blonde twenty-something tall, broad shouldered man slipped out the drivers window while his cousin, a shorter brunette but no less solid man, swung out the passenger side. Watching the shadows carefully they strode to the trunk of their car opening it to unload the duffel bags within. The blondes blue eyes met the others brown eyes nodding to each other indicating that the area was clear. Not a word was spoken, however; they moved in tandem from a lifetime of living and working together.
As they pulled the last of the bags from the back of their car an old beat-up pickup pulled in across from them. An older man and younger woman also wearing work clothes, though the older man wore coveralls, stepped out of their vehicle. The twenty-something brunette woman grabbed her over-sized heavy back-pack and slipped it on. Then she grabbed supplies from the bed of the truck carrying them quite easily. Winking her brown eyes at the elderly man, who didn't look a day over 45, he huffed as he grabbed the last case of water bottles the only item left in the truck. They also warily checked the shadows while crossing the parking lot to the two men carrying bags of food and drinks.
Wordlessly greeting each other the foursome started to slip into the empty hotel. At that moment a new model black dodge Charger pulls into the parking lot stopping them from entering. They wait silently as a tall black man and slightly shorter white man with an older priest exit the vehicle pulling their own duffel bags out of the car. Nodding in silent greeting the group enter through the back door.
Once inside the woman sweetly whispered, “In my dream we needed to go to room 314 and set up a blind.”
“You got the charms and amulets for Father John to bless?” the blond asked nonchalantly.
“Right here cousin,” she answered with a smile, showing her over-sized backpack.
The brunette commented in quiet awe, “I still can't believe how strong you've gotten cuz.”
Taking hold of the reins of leadership the elderly country gentleman ordered, “Bo, Luke, Enos. You boys get the blind setup and ready the ammo. Remember the signs and portents. Daisy, Turk, Father Francis. Let's get the victuals cooked and water blessed.” letting out a small chuckle he added, “Just never could kill demons and vampires on an empty stomach.”
Savage, loony grins spread across their faces as the young adults all chorused, “Yes Uncle Jesse.” with a “Yes sir.” from Turk and a silent nod from Father Francis Mulcahy.
The Dukes of Hazzard are in town and all Hell was about to bust loose!
A black Humvee coasted in front of the old building and pulled into the parking lot with a minimum of fuss.
“The Hyperion Hotel?” Daniel read off the sign running a hand through his dirty blond hair, “I've heard of this place. Wasn't there a massacre here back in the Fifties?”
“Don't know Daniel.” Colonel Jonathon 'call me Jack' O’Neill (with two L's) answered. His brown eyes narrowed in concentrated observation, scanning the parking lot and surrounding area. He said, “But this is the place according to the Lieutenant’s information. Speaking of which,” he speed-dialed his cell phone and when the other end was picked up he asked, “Carter, you there?”
“Yes sir. We're stocked up and on our way.” his second-in-command answered succinctly.
Doing a passable imitation of Montgomery Burns Jack said, “Egggsellent!”
On the other end of the phone he could tell there was a smile tugging at her lips, but Major Carter kept it simple, “Yes sir. ETA 15 minutes. Out.”
Jack put the phone away with a soft smile. Feeling someone stare at him he did a double-take at Daniel's look of gentle exasperation.
“What?” he asked with a butter-wouldn't-melt-in-my-mouth expression.
Daniel just snorted while Teal'c rumbled from the back seat, “I still do not understand why you and Major Carter have not 'connected-up' yet.”
“That's 'hooked-up' Teal'c,” Jack corrected his friend, “and it's 'cause we're in the same Chain of Command.”
“Why you don't retire and get hired as a Civilian Consultant on the project I still don't understand.” Daniel groused.
Jack hit the brakes a little harder than he intended parking next to an orange Charger. He sat still staring off into the distance in shock. A few seconds passed until a worried Daniel asked, “Jack? You okay?”
Jack slowly turned to Daniel and stated in simple wonder, “And THAT is why you have a Doctorate in archeology, Dr. Daniel Jackson.”
Before anyone else in the car could say anything Jack spun and ordered good-naturedly, “All right campers! Let's get unloaded and setup in the hotel!”
Before they could open the hatch a classic black Thunderbird convertible and what could only be a rental car (it was that ugly) pulled into the parking lot. Daniel grabbed the guns as he was on the far-side of the Humvee and slipped around behind Jack and Teal'c passing a weapon to each as surreptitiously as possible. Once the cars parked a tall short-haired platinum blond stepped out.
“They're okay,” he told his team-mates, “They're on our side... mostly.” he finished safetying his hand gun then stuffing it into the back of his jeans.
Teal'c and Daniel followed his lead while Daniel quirked an eyebrow, “Mostly?” he bemusedly queried.
“Yeah, mostly.” Jack answered.
“Darlings! So good to meet George's friends!” the blond cried out in greeting as the couple approached from across the parking lot.
Daniel simply said, “Ah, I see.”
The tall long-dark haired man approached with studied nonchalance. The blond's hand possessively threaded through the crook of his left arm told Jack they were definitely an item. He could see the easy way they moved together showing they are a formidable team. The other two men walked slightly spread out and behind the couple fading slightly into the background. Jack and Teal'c exchanged a glance communicating with each other that they saw the same thing. The couple in front used their good looks and flashy outfits to distract the un-wary from noticing the other two men.
Stopping in front of Jack just slightly out of arms reach the man of the couple stuck his hand out in greeting. His brown eyes twinkled to some hidden joke only he knew as he stated, “Hi, Duncan MacLeod. This is my colleague Adam Pierson and my kinsman Conner MacLeod. The lovely lady is Amanda Devereaux. Our mutual 'friend' George Hammond contacted Amanda letting her know you were in town. He asked us to show you the sites here in L.A. since we were down here for an archeology symposium we agreed.”
“Good to meet you Duncan.” Jack said. Turning to Amanda he asked, “Do you have our 'friend' George's item?”
She smirked, holding up a purple heart ribbon. Flipping it over she showed the mark engraved on the back to be exactly as General Hammond had described.
“Thank you.” Jack said. Holding her eyes he asked, “Now can I have my watch back?”
Duncan gasped, “Amanda!”
“What?” she demurred, “its a very nice watch.”
With an exasperated sigh Duncan softly glared at her and she wilted slightly as she said, “All right, all right. I'll give it back to him.”
As she handed his watch back to Jack, Daniel piped up, “Are you an Archeologist Duncan?”
“No, I deal in rare art and 'Ancient Artifacts' through my shop in Seacouver.” Duncan answered. Jack swore he could almost SEE the capital letters and quotation marks.
“Well then, why don't we get inside so we can get ready to see these 'sites'.” he advised making actual quotation marks with his fingers.
Amanda purred, “Oh, I like him.”
Duncan just groaned.
“Daisy? Where are you girl?” Uncle Jesse called out walking into the foyer of the Hyperion Hotel. Noticing her near a window he said, “Oh, there you are Daisy.”
She shushed him with a finger to her lips and motioned him closer. Moving very lithely for a mid-forties man he sidled up behind his niece. Sneaking a peak over her shoulder out the window he witnessed the meeting outside. Pulling his niece back he whispered, “Is that the right number of people? I seem to recall you saying there should be three women with them.” peaking back out he added, “They're short two.”
Daisy was about to answer when the salt and peppered haired man pulled a vibrating cell phone from his back pocket. She motioned her Uncle Jesse to be quiet while she moved closer to the window straining her ears.
“Yo Carter. You caught in traffic?” the man joked.
She couldn't quite hear the person on the other end of the phone, but so far she was experiencing extreme Deja-Vu so strongly it was almost dizzying.
“She wants me to say what at where?” he asked incredulously. There was a moment of silence. Then, shrugging his shoulders he said, “Okie dokie.”
Facing the window Jesse and Daisy Duke were hovering near he called out, “Ollie, ollie, oxenfree! All daughters of Sineya, come out, come out wherever you are!”
Uncle Jesse was flabbergasted while Daisy giggled her way out the door. Throwing her long dark hair back she strode out to the group right up to the older man with the cell phone. Holding her hand out she asked, “May I please speak with Hailey?”
“Yeah, sure, you-betcha!” Jack answered slowly handing her the cell phone.
Holding it up to her ear she asked, “Hailey?”
On the other end Lieutenant Jennifer Hailey found herself glad she didn't drive after all. Her breath catching in her chest she returned, “Daisy?”
“Oh Thank God!” they both exclaimed at the same time.
There were chuckles and some laughter on both ends of the line. Daisy simply said, “See you in a bit 'little' sister.” and hung up the phone.
Jack barked out a shot of laughter declaring, “ Oh, I LIKE you!”
Daisy blushed a little bit then rallying she stated, “Welcome to the Hyperion ya'll. We got some food grilling so lets get ya'll inside and settled then we can eat.”
Everyone grabbed a bag and hustled inside.
The parking lot was far from deserted when Major Carter pulled up. Pulling into an empty spot near the delivery door both Carter and Hailey watched Bo, Luke, Enos, Jack, and Teal'c setting up a barricade near the Alley entrance.
“Oh, momma likes!” Hailey muttered.
Her superior officer, one Major Samantha Carter gasped, “Lieutenant!”
“What?” Hailey asked as innocently as possible. Turning back to enjoy the view she commented, “Don't you know? Ladies love Country Boys!”
Carter just snorted at the Lieutenant's smirk, “Let's just get this ordinance inside.”
“Ma'am, yes ma'am.” Hailey answered semi-seriously.
They were greeted by the men as they exited the Humvee. Bo, liking what he saw, strode up to Lieutenant Hailey greeting her with, “Well, hello there little lady. Can I help you with the heavy stuff?”
While she liked what she saw Hailey still hated it when someone called her little. So, showing off her new-found strength she picked up the heaviest container saying, “No Thanks. I got it, after all, we wouldn't want you to strain something.” She strutted into the hotel leaving Bo behind with his jaw on the floor.
Luke just laughed at his cousin getting shot down once again. Clapping him on the shoulder whilst heading towards the Humvee he consoled, “Don't worry cousin. She'll come around sooner or later.”
Bo brightened at that, hopefully asking, “You really think so?”
“No.” he replied while grabbing a couple containers of ammunition. He walked off laughing the whole way.
Bo snorted, muttering, “Thanks cuz. Thanks a lot.”
Once everything was inside and stored in their proper places and positions Daisy called everyone down for a 'home' cooked meal. Jack was the last one down, drawn to the lobby by the delicious smelling food. He scanned the room until he spotted a familiar figure. His eyes widened in surprise seeing the priest bring out a platter of ham from the kitchen.
Muttering to himself, “What is this, memory lane revisited?”
Walking into the foyer he snapped out, “Sargent Duke, report!”
Jesse Duke, U.S.M.C. Retired, spun to attention belting out, “Sir!” Eyes widening in surprise he belted out, “Major? You're not dead yet?”
Carter shared a look with Jack. He shrugged. She just shook her head with a soft smile.
“No. I'm not dead yet ya old coot! And Father Mulcahy! You're still hanging out with this old reprobate?” Jack joked back in greeting shaking each mans hands.
“Uncle Jesse? You know Hailey's boss?” Daisy asked.
“Yep.” he answered. He explained, “Father Mulcahy and I met him back in The 'Nam. The three of us met the slayer of that time. We helped her take out a regiment of Vampires before they overran the good Father's M.A.S.H. Unit.”
“Yeah, good times.” Jack joked.
“Jaaack.” both Daniel and Father Mulcahy admonished him at the same time.
Father Mulcahy smiled and asked, “Jack, I hear you've got Radar's grandson working for you?”
Jack frowned in thought, then, “You mean Walter is Radar's grandson?” he asked in surprise.
Father Mulcahy nodded in confirmation.
“Well.” Jack huffed, “That explains a lot.”
“Uncle Jesse?” Daisy nervously asked, “Is that why you knew about me and didn't reject me?”
“Oh honey.” Jesse pulled her into a fatherly hug stating, “Even if'n I didn't know I'd never reject you!”
“Thanks Uncle Jesse. Love you.” she said.
“Love you to dahlin' girl.” he answered.
The fighting had been going on for awhile. They watched, they waited. So many times they wanted to join the fray but the two Slayers amongst them stood strong. Finally, the girls gasped, looked at each other and with a simple nod split off to their agreed upon positions.
Hailey took Major Carter, Teal'c, and Father Mulcahy down to the first level. Waiting by the back alley door Hailey gave a 5-count then they burst through it, Teal'c leading the way. Firing his Staff weapon he cleared the way for Carter and Hailey to grab the bleeding black man from the ground and haul him inside. Swinging and firing his weapon Teal'c made his way to the young man that had just been overwhelmed. Together they fought a retreating action back to the door and into the building.
Once inside Teal'c handed his staff weapon off to Carter. She trained the weapon on the door whilst Teal'c pushed the prepared barricade over and into position. Hailey had crafted it to lock into the stops they welded and bolted to the floor. Not even a Fyarl demon could get through.
Hailey was already field dressing the black man's wounds with Father Mulcahy's help. Once stabilized she ordered the priest, “Go. Do your thing Father.”
Carter gave Teal'c his staff weapon. Grabbing the young man up in a fireman’s carry she followed Hailey who pushed the injured man on a makeshift gurney. Teal'c stayed with the good Father while he used holy water to bless the barricade and door. Almost immediately they could hear screams and shouts of pain from the other side.
Up on the third floor Bo and Luke Duke were double checking their new warheads for their wooden bows.
“Bet'cha I can get more than you Luke.” Bo challenged.
“You're on.” Luke responded.
“This ain't Helms Deep boys!” Daisy admonished them as she entered the room.
Luke chuckled as Bo scrunched his eyebrows in consternation grunting out a, “Huh?”
“Later cuz.” Daisy said. Looking out the window while not exposing herself she reminded her cousin's, “Remember. Don't shoot till the Warlock shows up. The Demons'll be packed in like carp when the fishing hole is low.”
The boys simply nodded in agreement double checking their sawed off shot-guns with ammo made of wood and silver blessed by Father Mulcahy.
Down in the foyer Father Mulcahy assisted Jesse Duke in cleaning and dressing the injured mans wounds. Daisy, fresh from checking one her cousins, checked the injured man's vital signs while her Uncle finished stitching him up. Noticing the young man sitting glumly off to the side she asked, “What's your name?”
“Conner.” he stated as she sat down next to him.
“Well Conner. I generally like to know all those that are about to be my friends.” she informed him. Smiling her megawatt country smile she asked, “What's his name.”
“That's Gunn, Charles Gunn.” he choked.
“Don't worry Conner. My Uncle Jesse is good at this. We'll get him fixed up right proper!” she declared.
“Now Jack?” Amanda asked. Again. For the tenth time.
“Nope.” he answered, popping his 'p' just to annoy her.
She growled in frustration provoking Duncan to ask, “But, Amanda, I thought you liked him.”
“Oh, it's not him.” she started. Duncan finished for her, “I know, you hate waiting.” Stretching up a bit to peer around the corner he observed, “Say, I think that demon has a jewel in his forehead.”
“I hate you right now Duncan MacLeod.” the long time thief flatly stated, “It's important you know that.”
Everyone around her just chuckled quietly at the couple antics. Jack leaned away from the corner and pulled everyone closer with a gesture. Lowering his voice to a whisper he informed them, “It's almost time. Everybody ready?”
Teal'c nodded stoically, as usual, hoisting his trusty staff weapon. Hailey grinned, checking her special blessed K-bar knife in it's sheath then confirmed she had enough blessed explosive head ammo. Giving a thumbs up to her commanding officer she let him know she was ready. The four Immortals nodded, checking their swords once more.
Methos muttered, “Five thousand years it took me. Five thousand years to get a Thrice Blessed Weapon and I'm probably about to die. It figures.”
“What was that Old Man?” Duncan asked.
“Oh nothing.” Methos simpered.
“Good.” Jack interrupted, “cause the tiny blond just arrived. Time to go.”