Queen of the Slayers?
Chapter 9: Queen of the Slayers?
Buffy was somewhat confused, which was for her saying a lot, considering the fact that she liked to play the dumb blonde routine whenever she was dealing with the things that went bump in the night. When she and all her friends, many of whom had been listed among the dead over the years, along with and including all the Slayers who had been in existence since they were first created, stood in that vast white ‘Vastness’ as it had been called. The fact that her friends had joked around about her being THE Queen of the Slayers since they were empowered, kind of fell flat as jokes go, especially when your inner Slayer had gone running and cowering into the deepest recesses of your mind and soul when you and all of the previously mentioned from every reality are approached by a being that had to be over twelve feet tall, with a golden helmet on his head, massive wings, a massive flaming sword and a Heavenly glow of power radiating from it.
Did she forget to mention the fact that he looked completely and utterly drool worthy with shinning bright blue eyes that she felt she could loose herself in. The fact that he had, after the big intro earlier by The Voice, speaking on behalf of God, wanted to talk to all of them, also since they happened to be the only ones left made this a no-brainer according to Buffy.
There was also the fact that there was a lot more of her to go around, including a lot of copies of her mom, one of whom she hoped and prayed dearly to God was her actual mom. The fact as well that many of the different versions of her were with other versions of Xander and other guys she did not know. In fact some versions of Xander had multiple women hanging off of him. There were versions of Willow, Cordelia, Jenny, Amy, Faith and herself plus others she recognised as Slayers.
They weren’t just hanging off of him for protection or some sort, that much was obvious. It looked a lot more like it was a series of small harems but that couldn’t be right, could it? Not Xander? And then there was the annoying fact that almost all of those Xander's kept on winking and making those come hither looks at her. It weirded her out big time to see it as they did the same to her female friends from her reality who were standing beside her, it gave them the wiggens, big time.
Poor Giles was almost in a coma, his usual “Oh Dear”, ”Good Lord”, “Oh My Dear Lord” and his constant rubbing of his glasses was somewhat comical for Buffy to see, even when he accidentally broke his glasses from the constant rubbing of them and their then sudden reversion into a pristine, had just been brought brand new look about them, which in turn set him off again with his worrisome words and that in turn set Buffy and her friends off into a small fit of giggles.
Giles was also eager to find a very intelligent man and his friends who had mentioned in the small chat they had had together, that he had in his possession and library, an actual full edition, unedited self updating version of Tobin’s Spirit Guide. There hadn’t been a copy of that book in existence in almost four hundred years and the fact that is was a self updating version made it even rarer. Every version of that book back home had suddenly burst into flames a long time ago. Giles had been heard mumbling that he had to find that man and his friends and get a copy of it if possible but where was he going to find Mr Egon Spengler and his friends since he and they were gone.
Their attention was brought to the very tall man, well, more like a very tall Angel who had introduced himself as THE Archangel Michael. Giles had actually fainted at hearing his name but was revived quickly by Michael himself.
“Now that the introductions have been dealt with, we can get down to business straight away. It all comes down to this very important scroll I have in my hand, so please no interruptions as I read it” he said as he pulled out a scroll and unfurled it and Buffy and the others noticed that it glowed with power as he unfurled it.
“By order” he started “Of The Almighty, The Alpha and The Omega, The Creator Heaven and of all existence, The Beginning of all and The End of all, The One True God, has decreed that YOU Buffy Ann Summers are to be and will Hence forth for ever more be The Queen of All Slayers. The Head of The Line into and beyond The end of all Existence and Eternity. It is also decreed by The Order of The One True God that you will also have a Subordinate Ruling Line and Council of Advisors, those who will rule in your stead if you go into battle, those who will rule the existing Slayer lines in your name in every reality within this cluster and also including every reality and cluster that exists outside of this cluster.
It is further more decreed by The Almighty that You and those of Your Subordinate Line , Council of Advisors and Family are to be made into New God's of the Heavenly Host and that you shall also be known as a Race onto your own. It is also decreed that any Offspring You and Your Council of Advisors and those of Your line and any Offspring they may have with mortals will attain their GodHood through the same trials that the other children of the God's of the heavenly host endure. Finally it is also decreed that You Buffy Ann Summers shall from this moment forward be known to those of mortal descent as The God Queen of the Slayer Race”.
The first words to be said after Michael had made his Announcement of God's Divine Declaration came from none other that one Faith Lehane and those words were said with enough volume that they would have been heard in Outer Mongolia if they had been standing on the Earth right there and then. those words were “YOUR SHITTING ME?”. This in turn got a response of thousands of “Faith!!!” in return to what she had just said.
Buffy at that moment had not heard a word as she was out cold with Michael standing over her trying to revive her while smiling at the same time at Faith's loud statement. Oh how he loved humans, they were so entertaining to be around, especially in situations like these.
Buffy came around being held in Michaels arms and she blushed a very deep red. She jumped up out of his arms, looked at him still blushing then looked all around at her friends and all of the other versions of herself and her friends. It was then that a load of questions started to form in her mind about what all of this meant for her and those now under her care and preview. She turned back to Michael and began to ask questions that she thought were important in the here and now but one came out to the forefront of her mind.
“DoesthatmeanthatmyactualreallifemomisnowaliveandifsheiswhereissheandwhencanDawnandIseeher?” she babbled.
Michael looked surprised at what passed for words came out of her mouth and asked “What did you just say because I didn’t understand a single word you just said to me”.
“I’ll translate for you, that was Willow babble that you just heard. What Buffy just said was ‘Does that mean that my actual real life mom is now alive and if she is where is she and when can Dawn and I see her?‘ and it’s a question I would like an answer to as well, I miss Mrs S, she was great fun and a MILF to boot as well” Xander said, especially the last part where he had a grin on his face while saying it.
Dawn and Buffy gave a shout of “Xander!!” and Xander smirked saying “That woke the two of them up, don’t worry girls, I don’t think of Mrs S that way, I just said it to get your brains going, they looked like they had stopped working there for a while”.
Xander got a surprise when a voice from his side answered “Why thank you very much for the compliment Xander dear, I happen to think that you are a bit of a young stud as well, especially from what young Faith had to say, as well as what Anya has been constantly saying about your prowess between the sheets, I just might have to take you for a test drive to see if their claims hold up to my very high standards. I will have you know for a fact that in my younger days before meeting Buffy's father I was considered to be insatiable when it came to sex.
Buffy's father almost killed that drive in me but I kept my eyes open for any delectable eligible young men that could satisfy me and I was watching you with interest as you grew up around Buffy. Its a pity my eldest daughter couldn’t see what was in front of her eyes but my youngest did and even offered to share you with me. I was very close to accepting that offer but then I kicked the bucket, but guess what lover boy, I'm back among the living now. Dawn and I along with Anya are going to be giving you a work out and maybe we will be able to pull Buffy and Faith in for a trial run with you as well”.
Xander dropped to the floor in a dead faint along with Buffy, Dawn on the other hand squeed with joy that her mom was back alive, rushed over to her, wrapped her arms around her and gave her a hug worthy of a Slayer and most importantly to her, helping her to get her Xander, so what if she had to share him, she was going to get her man along with getting him to take those blinkers off that he had on since forever.
Joyce smirked at Michael and then winked at Faith, Anya and Giles. Giles spluttered while trying and failing to hold in the laughter at Xander's and Buffy's reaction to her return to life and her return statement to Xander's joke. She called Faith over and whispered something in her ear which made the once Dark Slayer eyes pop out and shout out once more “YOUR SHITTING ME?” and then to say in a quieter voice asking “Are you sure, really sure”.
When Faith got a “Nope, no joke and really sure” back from Joyce she gave her a pure Slayer hug in return, along with the widest grin she had. Anya just smiled a knowing smile at her and nodded at her while Dawn just jumped up and down shouting “Yes, Yes, This is great, I can't wait to tell Buffy, when she wakes up of course, if she wakes up”.
Buffy and Xander did wake up, it was quite sudden for Buffy as she had just realised that her mother was back and was rushing headlong into her arms crying about missing her. Xander on the other hand, while shocked at the fact that Joyce was back among the living was still trying to get his head around the fact that Buffy's mom had just come on to him in a very serious way. Hah! She had looked very serious when she said what she had said. Poor Xander didn’t know weather she was serious or not as he knew she had a joking side to her with all the times she had playfully flirted back at his flirting with her. The number of times Buffy had been scandalised at their joking made for some good memories.
Buffy turned around and looked at Michael while drying the tears from her eyes and asked Michael
“What does this all mean, why have I been made a God of all things, surely someone else would have been a better pick for the position?”.
Michael just chuckled and replied “Buffy, there is a lot more to this than you know, your not just the God of all the Slayers but the God of all Slayers, female and male. There is now a male line to complement the female line and they all answer to you and your new Pantheon and yes I said Pantheon. You are its Matriarchal ruler, it’s Head and you or any daughter that you will have or any sister you have can rule it. As it stands now at this moment, those who are considered family to you are now God's as well. You can decide later on who becomes in charge of what aspect of your new Pantheon, I would suggest that you have Faith as your Goddess of war as it would fit her perfectly. As to why you were chosen for this position, well you will just have to ask my boss because here she comes”.
With that last part of his statement God's Herald Metatron appeared and stated out loud “KNEEL AND GIVE REVERENCE TO THE ALMIGHTY IN WHOSE PRESENCE YOU NOW EXIST”.
Even before he was saying it he started to sulk and pout because as one they all went down onto one knee and bowed their heads as soon as he had appeared.
“Ah here now” he started “That is just not fair, you’re already kneeling before I said anything, that’s just not right. Michael, did you give them any warning God or I was coming?”.
Michael just smirked at him and gave him a knowing grin to which Metatron replied “That’s not fair Michael”.
A chuckling could be heard behind Metatron and he turned around to God who was the chuckler and said to her “He has spoiled the part I find the most amusing, the looks of shock on their faces, it’s not fair”.
God smiled at them all and laughed quietly to herself and said back to him “You do know that its all part of that little prank war you think I don’t know that you two are having, have fun with it my children”.
God then turned to Buffy and the others, walked up to Buffy and raised her to her feet. She looked Buffy in the eyes, smiled at her and said
“I picked you for the simple reason that I know that you and those who you consider your friends and family will be perfect for this new Pantheon that I have created. It is you because you and all of your friends and family know what it means deep down within your souls what is required to fight the darkness, some of you may slip now and again” she said while looking at Willow and Faith and smiling at them,
“But you will always find your way back to the light. All of you know of how corrupt the Watchers Council was and went but you have no idea of just how far they had fallen, that the heads of the old Council had switched sides to join the darkness almost two thousand years ago. That is actually where and when the Cruciamentum came into existence; it was a means that they used to kill off the more experienced slayers because they knew that as a Slayer grew in power as she aged, it meant that she could end up taking out any higher level demons as she went up in power. It also had the effect of binding the souls of those Slayers as slaves to the Councils will.
That was something they had to stop and it resulted in the unneeded and unnecessary deaths of countless young Slayers. They now all stand before you with you as their new Queen because you helped to free their souls from the confinement that that wretched ritual had bound them into, the same fate that would have befallen you and Faith and all the other Slayers who would have come after your deaths. I had to do something to help you, so I decided that I would pull an old switch-a-roo and while Lucifer and Lucifer's number one minion the ‘First’ were distracted by me waving my left hand, they failed to see me use my right hand to alter their perspective concerning the Watchers Council and making them think that the Council was actually playing them for fools pretending to be dark.
They in turn decided to wipe out the Watchers Council which helped you when it came to dealing with the First and you and your friends and family were one step closer to what I knew you would be capable of becoming. That in turn gave rise to you activating all of the living Slayers in every reality and yes Willow, I did say every reality. They are now your Valkyries, your Amazon Warriors, your army through which you will smite the evil that exists in all the universes and realities within my creation.
As for the Powers That Be as they called themselves, their job was to see to the victory of good over evil, not to try and keep it balanced, they had even sided with evil where it suited their purpose in keeping the balance. They had been warned several times by Metatron to ‘get with the programme’ as you would say but they just played lip service to him and my instructions. Now that this crisis has happened I have fired them from their positions and dealt with them accordingly and placed My Angel's in charge temporarily until my new chosen power assumes her place as their replacement along with her new Pantheon as well”.
Giles would have hit the floor if a chair had not appeared for him to land in, he couldn’t believe it, his old bosses had sided with the darkness and the PTB didn’t care who won , just that a non-existent balance be kept. Now Buffy and all of them were new God's with their own Pantheon and to top it all off with a cherry on top they were to be the new Powers To Be, they would have to change that name very quickly.
It was a head rush and he looked up towards God with a questioning look in his eyes and he got a reply.
“Yes Rupert, it’s all very true and I know that all of you will do a far better job of your new positions and responsibility’s. Don’t worry about any of you making mistakes as I will be making sure that the other God's of the Pantheons help you in training you in all aspects of what is to be expected from you and yours.” God said reading his mind.
God turned her head back down to Buffy and told her “All of that and more is the reason why I picked you to be what I know you can be Buffy, you will do a very good job of it as well, I should know after all, I know everything” she winked at Buffy saying that last part, then continued “As for you not finding love, well, if you go after animated corpses you won't find any. It has to be a living breathing soul inhabiting body for you to fall in love and I don’t think that angelus would count in that respect considering that it was the PTB that made that part of your life happen as a means to control you. Your true love is over there beside your mother hugging her, showing that he had missed her greatly.
The rest of your true loves stand with him, as in Faith, Amy, Anya and Cordelia. Dawn and your mother Joyce along with you and those mentioned are his true loves. Don’t look so shocked Buffy, you seem to forget that in ancient times on Earth, multiple partners in marriage was allowed. It has only been in the last couple of centuries that it has been frowned upon and disallowed. Disallowing of such types of marriage is not something that I decreed and so is therefore invalid in my eyes, variety is the spice of life after all Buffy. Have a happy life with them all Buffy and kick evils shiny little rear end for me”.
God then gave a blushing Buffy a small kiss on the cheek, smiled at her and vanished in a flash of light with the words “Go get them my little Tigers” floating on the air, words heard by all of them and filling them with pride beyond bursting.
Giles was the first one to come to his senses with a “Good God Almighty” coming from his mouth.
Michael and Metatron both were chuckling at his remark and retorted with a “Most definitely Rupert, most definitely”
Metatron spoke out loud to everyone “Time for me to go, it was a brief and entertaining meeting which lacked the surprise I was hoping to spring on you, I blame Michael for that by the way and I will get my own back. Enjoy your new positions and know that anytime that you want help just call for me or Michael” and with that he was gone.
“What does this mean for everyone here, now?” asked Buffy “I mean about where do we go now, how are we to do it all, how are we going to be trained?”, “Its just that this is a lot to take in all of a sudden and how come no-one died from hearing God talk? because I know from Giles that no-one mortal can live once God speaks” . Buffy continued and before she could ask any more Michael interrupted her with some answers.
“Its like this Buffy, no-one here is mortal anymore, what this means for everyone here is that all of you will be going with me to the Ascended plains where I and certain other God's will be training all of those Ascended idiots and turning them into something that resembles intelligent life. They never bothered their Ascended heinies to help any race that existed on the mortal plains with the noted exception of individual members of those races, who they punished for their actions by the way, and a newly Ascended race called the Furling's. the rest of them didn’t care one way or the other and now they are going to pay for that attitude by being the mortal races servants, within reason. This is something that they will not like to say it mildly.
All of you will be joining in the physical training and the other God's will be helping train and guide you in how God's work within their own Pantheons. There is also the fact that those who are not God's will also be immortal, due to the fact that as God had stated they are now the equivalent of the Amazons of Themyscira from the Greek Pantheon with Athena as their primary Goddess or the Valkyrie of Valhalla with Odin as their God ruler from the Norse Pantheon.
The Slayer line as you might recall now has a male line and any offspring born will always be born a Slayer, only those children whose parents mated with mortals will be what is called a Half blood. Such children will, if they wish to attain the immortality that their Slayer parent has, have to go through trials of strength and courage and leadership, other wise they will be just very long lived mortals.
For those of Godly descent, their children will always be born as God's and will have to go through training like all the others. Those who are born of one Godly parent and an immortal will be born as God's as well. Those who have one Godly parent and one mortal parent will be born as a Half blood and go through the same trials as the other Half bloods”. “I hope I answered your questions Buffy” he finished with.
“Yea for the most part anyway, I’ll think of a lot more when we get to the plain of the asses but I do have a couple more to ask now” Buffy said while giving a cheeky grin at Michael.
Giles saw that grin and cringed as Buffy asked her couple of questions.
She started asking with “Ok, first, those demon look alike things we all saw up in that white place, what were they and why did they set off my and every other Slayers ‘slaydar’?”
“That’s easy Buffy” Michael answered “Just so you know, that white place is called the Vastness and is where God holds her audiences as it can be any size, case and point being it could hold multiple multi-verses and not strain its abilities. As for those ‘demon look alikes’ as you called them, they were aliens, as in aliens from other planets with space fleets and all that that entails. The reason why they set off your slaydar as I believe you called it is easy, they weren’t from Earth. Any life form not born on Earth will resonate against the Slayer part of you alerting you to a being that is not of this world.
That’s is how your ‘slaydar’ works, just like the fact that any demon on Earth weather it was born there or in its own dimension will resonate with your ‘slaydar’. The energies within any lifeform mark it as coming from whatever world, dimension or planet they were born on. It would take multiple generations of them being born on Earth for Earths energy to supplant the energy inherent to their birth place and even then there will be a minute trace left, even after five hundred generations. To completely surpass that inherent energy from being detected would require something like two thousand generations of births on Earth.”
All around them were blushing and stammering Slayers going on about being sorry about attacking the aliens after that explanation, especially multiple versions of Buffy and Faith who were looking rather sheepish while mumbling about being so embarrassed they could die and then realising they couldn’t.
Michael raised his hand to quieten them down after they realised the Faux Pas they had created and were worried about creating international or intergalactic incidents.
“You have nothing to worry about in those respects ladies, those races that you attacked were all warrior races and enjoyed the fights that they were involved in. As a matter of fact certain races, one of which some of our Buffy's and Faith's fought were called Klingons and you young ladies turned them on BIG TIME. They see a physical altercation, as in hair pulling, a punch or knee to the crotch, knee to the face, fist to the jaw full out brawl between a male and female as foreplay before a mating for life.
You young ladies had just proposed to those Klingons by fighting with them, you told them in their cultures way that you thought that they were prime mating material, that they were worthy of them giving you offspring and that many more would follow, congratulations ladies, your engaged and I'm not joking”, “don’t be surprised when they locate you and seek permission to consummate the mating ritual which you initiated”.
There were a lot of shocked and paled faces at hearing that especially when he said he wasn’t joking and they saw by his face he certainly wasn’t joking.
Michael continued talking “Klingons consider mating for life very seriously and will never stray from their chosen mate, they even consider human females to be quite the catch as human females are somewhat like Klingons females when annoyed, they take no prisoners and you ladies showed that in spades, and yes you will have to marry them or at the very least allow your new husband an equal share in your time. Yes I know, it sounds weird but their culture does allow for it happening from time to time. Many human women who are married to Klingons actually enjoy the marriage as it never looses that spice to it”.
“Now Buffy, what's your second question” Michael asked a shocked and stunned Buffy who was thanking God she had not acted on that urge to pummel those Klingons but had to laugh at those versions who did.
“Yea, second question, eh? ....right, right , the second question was, who were the talking animals I saw of to my side about a kilometre away from us. I saw a talking fat black and white Panda, couldn’t make out what it was saying, but looked to be talking to a Tiger, a Crane, a Monkey, a Goose, a Snake, A Red Panda and A RHINO and that’s not mentioning all the OTHER ANIMALS as well, how can they talk, how can they understand English or any language at all, their animals, how?”
Buffy was hyperventilating at asking this because it confused her no end.
“Buffy! This question is one of the easiest you have asked me, its quite simple, humans never evolved on that version of Earth. The intelligence that humans take for granted as their right was given to the animals as their right to have and use. Their culture mirrored ancient China before they came to their new home. The best way to understand and think of them is as a new breed and species of humans. It’s an easy answer to your question”,
“Now, anymore questions for me?”, “No?” , “Ok then its off to start your training” and with that they vanished from the Vastness into the Ascended plains to begin their training, all the while hearing Michael laughing at the stunned look on Buffy's face from his answer.
End of chapter
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