Disclaimer: I own nothing from Buffy or the Hobbit. This is for amusement only.
Summary: “Oh, I’m sorry. Did I say if it pleases your, majesty?” Buffy meets the company and Thorin. Needless to say, it doesn’t go well.
Pairings: Slight Buffy/Thorin
GOLDEN HAIRED GIRL
There was something about the green hills of the Hobbiton that instantly sent a wave of calm and peace over her as she walked up the long a winding road. Perhaps it’s because the Hobbits kept themselves isolated from the outside world, leaving their lands untouched by greedy and harmful hands. It was pure. She admired the twinkling stars still startled by their beauty ever since she had arrived in this world so many years ago. Where she had come from they were lost behind a sea of smog and pollution. A bitter smile appeared on her lips as she greeted the lonely man on the moon. It was one of the only things that hadn’t seemed to change after traveling to this world, even thought logically she knew it wasn’t the same moon.
A sigh of longing fell from her lips, and she turned her hazel eyes away from the sky and towards the green door bearing the dwarfish rune. She supposed it was time to make her grand entrance. She was terrible late after all, and Gandalf would be most upset because she knew that he wanted to have words with her before she met the group.
Oh, well, she wouldn’t be Buffy Summers if she did what she was told after all.
The entire group went into chaos when it was discovered that Gandalf had in fact, no experience in fighting dragons. Thorin’s face was ever blank, but his blue eyes were sharp and fierce. Gandalf however stood ever patiently waiting for all the chaos to come to an end while Biblo just wondered how his normal day went so very wrong. Thorin opened his mouth to issue a reprimand on all his company when a loud knock on the door made everything fall silent.
“There’s more of you?” Bilbo looked a tad frightened by the very idea.
Thorin’s brows furrowed and he tossed Gandalf a dark look. “What is the meaning of this?” He asked, seeing the sly twinkle in the wizard’s eyes. Whoever was at the door was brought here by the wizard, but for what purpose? They already had their fourteen company, that was if the hobbit didn’t die of fright before hand.
“You shall see,” Gandalf told him mysteriously. “Bilbo, will you please let out guest in? Before she decides to bust in the door,” he added, knowing that the hobbit would shoot off in a hurry to protect his property.
“She?” Thorin’s voice was as cold as ice. There were grumbles of displeasure from several other dwarves as well. Dwalin, and Nori being the loudest.
“Be grateful,” the wizard told him. “You asked me to find you a fourteenth member, and I have found you a fifteenth as well.”
“But a woman! Have you gone mad?” Thorin didn’t bother hiding his displeasure and shot Gandalf a thunderous look. “We cannot bring a woman on this adventure!”
“You can and you will,” Gandalf stated sharply.
“Oh, I hope you all aren’t fighting over little old me.”
Buffy tapped her foot impatiently waiting in front of the green door. She had half a mind to kick it in, but she had a feeling that the Halfling who lived here wouldn’t appreciate it and she didn’t want to make an enemy of someone made right off the bat. Okay, that wasn’t true. She didn’t care who she made mad because she honestly didn’t want to be here, but she owed Gandalf and the old lout had called his debt, so here she be. Letting out a frustrated sigh through her nose, she raised her hand to knock on the door when it opened up. Buffy blinked, staring at air. She was momentarily stumped, when she remembered hobbits were short and looked down.
She found a pair of brownish green eyes staring back up at her inquisitively. Those eyes reminding her of Dawn, wide eyed innocence and knew in that very moment she would do her damnedest to protect him. What a nice change of pace. I don’t have to break my neck looking up at someone,
she thought with a slight snort. Eyeing the tiny, curly haired man, she bowed at the waist. “Buffy Summers, at your service,” she greeted him, a bright smile on her face. See Giles, I did learn some manners from you after all.
A faint blush dusted over the hobbits cheeks, and he stuttered, “B-Bilbo Baggins, at yours. Please,” he gestured for her to come inside, “come--”
“Never issue a vocal invitation,” she said, the rule coming off her lips instinctively. “There are more than a few things out in the dark that can only be let in like that.”
The Adam’s apple on Bilbo’s throat bobbed. “What kind of things?” He asked, his curiosity getting the better of him.
“Hopefully, nothing you’ll ever have to worry about,” Buffy said, her smile waning a fraction. The scar on her neck itched and she resisted the urge to reach up touch it, but she didn’t want to draw too much attention to it. She stepped around him, make sure to make her movements slow and easy. The hobbit looked worse for wear, as if at any moment he would pass out from the stress. She felt bad for the little guy having a feeling that Gandalf somehow conned him into the adventure, too.
She followed the voice, and caught the tail end of a conversation. “But a woman! Have you gone mad? We cannot bring a woman on this adventure!” Oh.
Buffy’s lips parted in surprise. Not by the words, but by the voice. That voice rumbled like thunder, and sent jolts of awareness through her body. It was the kind of voice that demanded your attention, whether you liked it or not. Such a shame that it’s attached to an ass,
she thought, already not liking the voice’s owner.
“You can and you will,” Gandalf’s voice was stern, and firm.
Buffy couldn’t fight a smile, being reminded slightly of Giles whenever he was exasperated with her. She entered the room, regarded them all from underneath her leaf green hood. “Oh, I hope you aren’t fighting over little old me,” she said, her voice overly sweet with more than a little sarcasm.
Thirteen pairs of eyes swiveled towards her while Gandalf took his time turning towards her. His brushy grey brows rose as he sent her a pointed look. “You’re late,” he stated.
“I know,” she sent him a smile that made him grumble under his breath. “So…” her eyes drifted back to the group. “This is your band of merry men now is it?” She asked, giving them a smile that showed all her teeth. Her Slayer instincts to show that she was alpha rising within her chest, even though she tried to stomp them down. It was one thing she despised about this world. The magic, and natural laws were different and it had changed the Slayer senescence inside of her making it all the more volatile. Her eyes flickering through all the group, and she introduced herself, “Buffy Summers, at your service.”
“Buffy?” Fili snorted, while Kili failed at hiding a snigger. “What kind of name is Buffy?” He asked. Laughter ensued around the table, and Buffy went stock still.
Gandalf groaned, leaning his forehead against the tip of staff trying to stifle his chuckles of amusement. A glare was tossed at him from the short blond, and he merely shrugged. He had told her to use her surname since the name Buffy would not strike any was serious.
“There is nothing wrong with Buffy!” Buffy hotly announced, her hands on her hips. “Buffy is a perfectly normal name! And anyone who says otherwise will end up with every bone in their bod--”
“Lady Buffy,” Gandalf spoke loudly to drown out her threat, “please meet Dwalin.” He looked none to pleased to see her, and she had a feeling they would be bumping heads sometime along the journey but she inclined her head politely anyways. “Balin,” Gandalf pointed at an older dwarf who had a kind, welcoming smile upon his face. She offered him a kind smile and slight bow in return. The wizard then pointed to the two youngest of the group, “Fili, Kili.”
The two sent Buffy their best charming smiles, and it took Buffy everything in her not to snort. I’m probably old enough to be their mother, she thought, and nodded politely at the two. Gandalf continued through the entire group, and he turned to introduce Thorin, but Thorin had finally had enough of the pleasantries. “It is pointless going through all the trouble of introducing us to her. She will not be coming,” his voice was a demand and it left no room for argument.
Buffy’s eyes flickered towards Thorin, raking him up and done. So the package wasn’t so bad either, and it made the voice all more appeal. She wasn’t normally attracted to the rough and gruff type, or a man with a beard and such long hair, but something about this man immediately got underneath her skin in more ways than one. But as that moment, his attitude was her only concern. “So, I take it your Grumpy,” Buffy smiled at him.
Gandalf smothered a laugh, trying to make appear as a cough. Buffy had explained Snow White and the Seven Dwarves after he told her of the quest. “This is Thorin, son of Thrain,” Gandalf introduced him, after clearing his throat. “Future King of the Mountain,” he added, hoping Buffy would take the hint and would be further dissuaded from insulting the man.
She raised an eyebrow at the wizard before sparing Thorin one last glance because seriously he was a hunk of salty goodness before turning away. “Well, Mister Thorin, I doubt that you can talk Gandalf out of his decision to drag me along on this oh, so fun adventure that we are going to be undertaking, so you’re stuck with me,” Buffy said, dismissively.
The entire room went so silent you could have heard a pin drop. Thorin’s mouth was slightly agape at being dismissed by this slip of a woman who hadn’t the nerve to take down her hood and reveal her face. His mouth snapped audible shut, and his jaw clenched. “I will not bring her, Gandalf,” Thorin said, through his teeth. “We have one burden with the burglar that you have suggested, we do not need another.”
“Burden?” Buffy went stock still, and her hazel eyes turned on Thorin with a vicious cool look. When her gaze locked with his, the Slayer inside of her rose up trying to force her to assert herself as leader of the pack. To fight Thorin who was clearly the other Alpha. She forced the instinct down, and took a deep breath. “I assure you, big bad King Under the Mountain,” she said, while pulling her sword free from her waist and propping it against the table, “that I take care of myself.”
Everyone watched in silence as she took the seat offered to her by Bilbo. She murmured a soft thanks to him, and got a beaming smile in return. Thorin’s hands clenched in fists, and his eyes narrowed upon the elvish blade. “You will not be coming. I will not have a friend of elves in my company,” Thorin snapped.
“I’m sorry, did I say if it pleased your majesty?” Buffy scowled up at him. “I’m coming along, but I’m not coming along to help you.”
Gandalf’s eyes widened a fraction. “Buffy--”
Buffy held up her hand to silence him. “I’m going to help him,” she gestured at Bilbo who stood beside her.
“Me?” Biblo blinked.
“Yes. You remind me of my sister,” Buffy mentioned, nonchalantly. He did remind her too greatly of Dawn for Buffy to ignore, and she felt the need to protect him well deep inside of her.
“Your sister?” Gandalf looked vaguely surprised. “You have never mentioned a sister,” the wizard’s gaze narrowed ever so slightly.
“I haven’t mentioned a lot of things,” Buffy countered, with a calm smile. Oh, how the tables have turned. Isn’t fun being the one not in the know, doesn’t?
Of course, Buffy never said this outloud. She had a healthy, respectful fear of the wizards power…and getting turned into a toad.
“We are getting off the matter at hand,” Dwalin said, his voice low and rough. “Even if the dragon hasn’t been seen, the front gate is sealed. There is not way into the mountain.”
“That, my dear Dwalin, is not entirely true,” Gandalf said, regaining that mysterious twinkle in his eyes again. Twiddling his fingers, Gandalf produced a dwarvish key, ornately wrought.
Thorin took his gaze off the mysterious woman and to the key. His eyes widened in shock and he asked, “How did you come by this?”
“It was given to me by your father, by Thrain, for safekeeping. It is yours now,” Gandalf held out the key to Thorin.
Buffy watched as Thorin grasped the key, regarding it as if it were a great treasure and knew exactly what he was feeling. The locket around her neck was her mothers, one of the few possessions that she still had from home. She didn’t know how she would react if she lost it.
Fili stroked his beard in thought. “If there is a key, there must be a door,” he commented, out loud.
Gandalf pointed at the runes on his map with his pipe. “These runes speak of a hidden passage to the lower halls,” the wizard stated, looking around the table at everyone. He bit back a noise of aggravate at the dark look Thorin was sending Buffy. He had hoped the two would get along with all that they had in common, but apparently not.
“There’s another way in!” Kili announced, with a wide grin.
“Well, if you can find it,” Buffy felt the need to point out. She knew a lot about dwarvish architecture, the door would be hidden. “Dwarf doors are invisible when closed, are they not?”
“Yes. The answer lies hidden somewhere in this map and I o not have the skill to find it. But there are others in Middle-earth who can. The task I have in mind will require a great deal of stealth, and no small amount of courage. But, if we are careful and clever, I believe it can be done,” Gandalf stated, with a pleased smile.
“That’s why we need a burglar,” Ori smiled.
“But we have no need of a woman,” Thorin interrupted with a dark look. Buffy rolled her eyes at him, and reached up unbuckling her cloak to make herself more comfortable. “I don’t know what you were thinking Gandalf--”
Buffy pulled her hood back, and Thorin practically swallowed his tongue. Long wavy locks of golden cascaded down her shoulder being released from its prison like a shower of gold. Her sun kissed sun glowed with the intensity of a diamond, and her hazel eyes that met his, he saw flecks of brilliant emerald deep in them. She had scars. A tiny one upon her upper line, a nick from a blade barely noticeable. Another just underneath her chin where something had attempt to stab her. But the one on her neck was much more vicious looking. As if someone had buried their teeth into her neck with the intention of ripping it out. The sword wasn’t for show, he realized his earlier assumption was wrong. This woman was a warrior, had fought hard to survive and perhaps much more. Her painted pink lips quirked up in a sarcastic half smile that made her pixie nose scrunch up slightly. “You were saying?” She asked, placing her hands upon her hips.
Thorin’s jaw snapped shut, his expression becoming that of stone and his blue eyes darkened hiding what he was feeling. Gandalf looked faintly surprised, wondering if he had just imagined the look on Thorin’s face while Balin’s smile just widened ever more. The other dwarves seemed transfixed by the gold hair as well, Kili and Fili looked particularly smitten. Dwalin, the odd ball of the group, didn’t look one bit pleased.
“Very well. We will do it your way,” Thorin conceded. “Give them their contracts.”
Balin handed Bilbo who paled considerably. “It’s just the usual summary of out-of-pocket expenses, time required, remuneration, funeral arrangements, so forth,” Balin told the hobbit, his voice genially.
“Funeral arrangements?” Bilbo took a step back.
“I cannot guarantee his safety,” Thorin leaned towards Gandalf to whisper.
“Understood,” Gandalf murmured in reply.
“Nor will I be responsible for his fate,” Thorin added, his eyes narrowing furiously. He had no desire to let the hobbit or the woman to come along and had hoped to make Gandalf see reason.
“But I will not be responsible for them.”
“I can take care of Bilbo and myself,” Buffy raised her chin in silent challenge.
Thorin met her gaze head on, and his frown deepened into a full out scowl. “We shall see,” he stated, darkly.
Buffy opened to say something very unpolite when she heard a loud thud behind her and she turned to find Bilbo out cold on the ground. Buffy shook her head side to side ever so slightly and she looked at the dwarves trying to keep her expression stern though her eyes twinkled slightly with amusement. “Was that really necessary?”
Laughter was the only reply.
Thorin however didn’t laugh, nor did he acknowledge Buffy further. All he did was send her glances as if didn’t know what to make of her. That was fine because Buffy wasn’t sure what to make of him either.
Gandalf stroked his beard thoughtfully, pleased by this unexpected development.
This will be part of a One Shot Series if I take it any further. I wish I had time to make a long story, but alas, I do not have the time right now. Perhaps after I finish my NCIS story I will give it a go, but for now, it’s just one shots.
Hope you enjoyed! Rrs are appreciated!