Title: When in Rome…
Disclaimer: Do not own Buffy, nor do I own the Stephanie Plum novels.
Spoilers: Slight spoilers from post-S7, that I haven’t seen, but the only thing that is spoilerish is Buffy’s location. Now you know. And that was picked up from a forum discussion.
A/N: Bella makes me laugh.
Joe gazed up at the ceiling in the Sistine Chapel for a split second.
It was pretty, and he was in the Vatican. As in the Vatican where the pope lived.
Yet, he couldn’t keep his concentration on the buildings around him for more than a couple of seconds, tops.
He knew there were several factors in that.
1. He’d broken up with Stephanie. When he had trouble sleeping at nights because he worried about her work, he knew he was in deep shit. Probably he should have done more to convince her to quit, and marry him instead. But, like the prime Morelli he was, it had quickly escalated to him breaking up with her, instead of asking her to marry him.
2. His mother had ordered him to take a holiday. How pathetic at hiding your feelings were you when your own mother noticed that you were down?
3. His boss gave him time off. His boss never ever voluntarily gave anybody time off. Therefore something was cooking at work, something that people didn’t want him to be a part of.
4. He was in Rome. With his grandmother, Bella. Yes, she with the Eye. It had turned out that he was the only one in his family gullible enough to accept. And the only one who didn’t fear her, much.
He knew he was out of it when his mother had managed to trick him into going to the mother country with his crazy grandmother.
His grandmother whom he’d spent forever chasing after, making sure that she wouldn’t get kidnapped, or something worse.
Of course she spoke Italian, fluently, and since she was a native it was probably not too much to demand. His Italian was weak, but as long as he knew enough to ask if anybody had seen a little old lady walking by, and order pizza, he figured that he knew more than enough. The pick-up lines he’d practiced in his wild youth proved to be of no use here. Who’d want to go out with someone who travelled with their grandmother, for Christ sakes? Remembering where he was, he crossed himself. Probably best not to take the Lord’s name in vain, even if it was just in his thoughts.
A quick gaze around proved that he’d lost Bella, again.
He held back a curse, why tempt fate?, and stalked off to find her.
Buffy liked the job Giles had gotten her. Tour-guide in the Vatican, how cool was that?
All the Holy water she would ever need at her immediate disposal.
Dawn had picked up on the language pretty fast… But for once Buffy hadn’t been far behind. Working at the Vatican would prove useful, and something she’d imagined wouldn’t be too stressful.
Well, those American tourists had proven her wrong.
But the guise as tour-guide worked well most days. She certainly had the freedom to move around, both in that capacity, and the one as Slayer protecting what every creature of the night dreamt of – the Vatican library. Why shouldn’t they? It had every secret known to man since Judas betrayed Jesus. Probably a few from before that as well.
Go home and cry your hearts out Council of Watchers. Oh, wait – she was supposedly a part of them now. Never mind.
Probably better go stop that old lady before she wandered off somewhere she shouldn’t be.
“Excuse me,” Buffy preferred to try out in English before giving into last resort Italian. “But you can’t really go down there.”
“My visions told me of something evil that was going to happen…” Buffy would have asked the old lady to elaborate. Too many years of Slaying had taught her never to laugh at anybody with visions, but a hot guy interfered.
“Excuse us,” he beamed a large smile at her. “I’ll just take my grandmother away from you now.”
“You’re American, here for a holiday?” Buffy asked. Normally she would have just let him drag his grandmother away, but the old lady's visions, and his looks had made her curious.