Spike lay back in his tomb of a drawer. He’d spent the time after Buffy left listening to Jordan and Nigel debate his blood type. It would have been funny if they hadn’t kept stabbing him with their needle to extract more blood for testing. As they put him back in the drawer he was beginning to call home, Spike heard them discussing the autopsy they had scheduled for him the next day. They would be having words if Buffy didn’t get him out of here tonight.
Buffy stood in the hotel room that she and Spike had been sharing until the accident, looking around she checked for anything she could be forgetting before piling everything on the cart to take down to the cab. She figured it’d be best to move away from the address she’d given the Medical Examiners and with their Randy and Joan identities in place, the police would hopefully have a hard time tracking them. With her and Spike’s luggage, Buffy left the hotel for a small bed and breakfast just outside of the city limits. Getting from the ME’s to their new home would be a pain, but Buffy had noticed a subway station entrance not even a whole block from the ME’s office so their getaway would hopefully be smooth. When the taxi dropped her off at the large house, Buffy quickly unloaded their luggage and started digging out what would have to serve as inner-city slay-wear. Pulling out black slacks, a black sweater, and a black leather jacket similar to the one Spike wore every night, the slayer prepared herself for battle. In a black handbag she put what had become known as her Bat Belt, an assortment of items, like fishing wire, hair spray, and a pocket pc, that had become necessary as vampires finally latched onto the digital revolution. The bag, it’s contents, and it’s unfortunate name had all been gifts from Xander, whose contracting business had taken off after the completion of the new Sunneydale high. Just before she walked back out into the night, Buffy pulled her light hair into a tight bun then donned her least favorite piece of equipment, a dark brown wig that, in her opinion, made her look too much like the evil vamp ho of doom that Spike had once dated. Pulling a black watch cap over her ears Buffy headed out to catch the last ferry to downtown Boston, which she did, after running back to the B&B to grab a second black hat to cover Spike’s plutonium enhanced head.
Buffy ran up the stairs from the subway and straight in to Bug. Hoping he wouldn’t recognize her she muttered an apology while plucking his wallet from his back pocket. Thankfully the shorter man noticed neither Buffy, nor her artful dodger routine and Buffy hurried past him to the multi-story brick building that currently housed her vampire. Stopping a block away from the main door, Buffy rummaged through her prize, extremely happy when she found Bug’s Identity Card/Door Key. She hadn’t expected this kind of luck and had planned for a much more complicated entry plan, but she wasn’t about to look a gif horse in the mouth. Walking confidently up to the glass doors, Buffy swiped the plastic card and grinned at the little green light. Once she had found the freezer room she swiped the card again and pushed on the door, only to be rebounded. Growling at the little card she rubbed the magnetic strip on her sweater and tried it again, then smirked at the flash of green and pushed the metal door open.
Once inside the freezer, Buffy realised she had a bit of a problem. There were about one-hundred metal doors, as well as a few gurneys with suspicious shapes covered in white sheets, and not one of them was labeled with a name. Not a single, friggin’, one. In place of names, each one had a neat, white tag on which was a letter and an eight digit number. With no better ideas, Buffy began opening and closing doors, looking for the shocking white hair of Spike’s head. After ten minutes and about fifty doors she was about to start screaming, she knew the noise would call attention to her presence in the building, but this was seriously getting to be a real pain in the neck. Just before she did her best Christine impression, Buffy pulled open a door two from the end and caught a glimpse of the familiar head. Grabbing the drawer handles, the slayer pulled her boyfriend from his frozen crypt and grinned down at his face, and was severely disappointed when there was no reaction. “Come on, you moron. I’m here to rescue my prince charming.”
Spike didn’t twitch.
After five minutes Spike still hadn’t moved
With a roll of her eyes Buffy bent down and kissed her boyfriend awake.
Spike was having a happy dream; he was sitting in the sun with Buffy in his arms. The dream was infinitely better than the one he’d been having not two minutes before, that dream had had something to do with the Antarctic and being kicked by giant penguins with scalpels. This new dream was so realistic, he could feel the touch of Buffy’s fingers on his face, and taste her lips on his, their sweetness and warmth and wait just a bloody moment. Spike’s baby-blue eyes flew open and were met by the hazel of his girlfriend.
“Oh thank bloody God!” the vampire said, sighing in relief, “Do you know what they did to me? What they were going to do to me? They wanted to remove my organs and put them on a damn scale!”
Buffy bent over and kissed Spike again. “Come one babe, let’s blow this Popsicle stand.” Spike stood up and Buffy realised their escape plan had one little, but growing, flaw. “But let’s liberate you some clothes first.”
Spike smirked, “I don’t know, this could work.”
Dr. Macy was sitting quietly, reflecting on the lack of chaos in the office, there were no police demanding his attention, no reporter trying to get an early scoop, and best of all no Jordan telling him how her latest case was falling apart on the slab. Nope, nothing, just peace and quiet. This was how a morgue was supposed to sound, how it was supposed to look, just quiet doctors and dead people, no one was supposed to be frantically running towards his office like Jordan was doing just now. Crap.
Jordan came to a skidding stop just outside of Dr. Macy’s office, “Dr. Macy,” She said, trying to catch her breath, “We have a problem.”
Dr. Macy closed his eyes and for a moment made believe that Jordan wasn’t standing there. “What’s wrong?”
“Do you remember the vehicular manslaughter victim we had in here?”
“The one who you were- Had? Don’t you mean have?”
Jordan shook her head, “And unless someone released him without filing any paper work, anywhere, he’s been snatched.”
Dr. Macy dropped his head to his desk, “Has anyone informed the girlfriend?”
Jordan hemmed and hawed for a moment, “We can’t find her.”
The head medical examiner closed his eyes and silently asked anyone who was listening what exactly it was he’d done in this or any other life to deserve body snatching. “I guess you’d better inform the police and public health department.” Crap.
Jordan stood next to Detective Woody Hoyt as he nodded into a phone call. “Yeah… Yeah… Thanks.”
As soon as he hung up the phone, Jordan pounced. “Well?”
Woody shook his head, “The desk manager said a woman fitting our description checked out early yesterday evening, and mentioned going to see family in Quebec City.”
Jordan’s eyes narrowed, “She’s running.”
The detective closed his eyes and took a deep breath, it could be hard to dislodge Jordan once the woman had sunk her teeth into something. “For all we know, this ‘Buffy’ could be completely innocent.”
“Her boyfriend just died, would you take off for a international vacation after something like that?”
Woody smirked, “I might if you were after me.”
Jordan smacked her friend on the shoulder. “Come on, there’s only a few places in the city where she could dispose of that body, we’ll find her.”
Buffy and Spike had been enjoying themselves since their prison break. Buffy reached across Spike’s nude body to grab the TV remote and turned the small set on. After the first fifty-something channels, the slayer was starting to wonder what the draw of having five hundred channels was exactly. She would have kept flipping if her bedmate hadn’t woken up and put a prompt stop to her activities. Neither ardently amorous adventurer noticed that the TV was still on.
Jordan stood to the right and behind Det. Hoyt as he addressed the assembled reporters. The detective had distributed pictures of both William Blutig and his body-snatching girlfriend along with printouts from the California Division of Motor Vehicles. Hopefully someone had seen Buffy and would report it.
Buffy reached out and snagged the TV remote from is precarious resting place on bedside table. Glancing up as she hit the power button, the slayer was surprised to see her face splashed across the screen, the DMV picture was followed by a brief description of herself. Oh, fuck.
“Spike,” the slayer said nudging the drowsy vampire next to her, “We have a problem.”
The blond vampire looked up at the small screen. “Yeah, you could say that. How did they get all that information?”
Buffy flopped back in the bed, “They’re the police, they do whatever.”
“Is it time to move?” Spike asked.
Buffy shrugged, “You’re the one with all the duck and evade practice. What do you think?”
“Well it’s not as though the owners’ve seen us.” Spike said, running his tongue along teeth. “We should be safe here for awhile.”
“Good,” Buffy muttered and tucked herself against her boyfriend’s body.
Lily had seen the WHDH news bulletin on her way out of the office, a woman named Hank was talking with her co-host about something, then Buffy and Spike’s faces filled the screen. She really hadn’t expected the Californian woman to respond to her boyfriend’s death the way she obviously did. It was unfortunate as well as unexpected. As she pulled into the driveway of the place her aunt was staying in, Lily checked the name on the business card against the one on the wooden sign hanging next to the door. Just as she was lifting her hand to knock, the door opened to a brunette Buffy.
“Ms. Summers,” The counselor said with a smile. “We’ve been looking all over for you. I have some bad news regarding-“
“Who is it, luv?” a voice Lily didn’t recognize interrupted her from behind Buffy. She looked up and into the face of a man who had previously been dead.
“-the man right behind you…”
Buffy’s shoulders sagged, “Lily, meet Spike. Spike, this is Lily, the counselor from the MEDICAL EXAMINER’S OFFICE!” The slayer turned to her boyfriend, irritation pouring from her face, “Why didn’t you just stay sitting where you sat? You’re dead, remember? Dead men do not come to the door!”
Lily watched, her confusion at the sight in front of her only growing as the man, who’d not twenty-four hours ago been lying dead in the morgue, raised his hands in surrender, “Well it’s not like you should be answering the door either Ms. My-face-is-plastered-across-every-news-station-here-to-Canada.”
Buffy grimaced, “Why don’t you come in Lily, we should probably explain things to you.”
Lily nodded and followed the couple into their small room. “So,” she said, her voice trembling slightly, “Um… If you weren’t really dead, how’d you survive the last three days? I mean you were in a freezing locker for a whole day, and you didn’t have a pulse.”
Spike looked at Buffy, who shrugged. The vampire turned back to Lily, “Do you believe in ghosts?”
“No,” Lily answered, “Unless that’s what you are, in which case I’m going to be re-evaluating my belief structure in the near future.”
Spike shook his head, “I’m not a ghost, I’m… well, I’m… I’m a vampire.”
Lily snorted, “What like black capes, widow peaks, and lightning when you laugh?”
Spike rolled his eyes, “I’m a vampire, not a Muppet. The whole Dracula thing is a stereo type most vampires try to avoid.”
Lily smiled, “Well, vampyrism is a valid life style choice, I’m sure, but that doesn’t explain how you were able to appear dead for three days.”
“No, I said vampire, with an ‘I’, not vampyre with a ‘y’. There is no ‘lifestyle choice’ at play here, in fact you could say it was the exact opposite which brings us here today. See,” Spike said vamping out, “I really am a blood sucking creature of the night.”
Lily fainted, passed right out.
“Well,” Buffy said, “That must make you feel good.”
Lily had been out of it for maybe ten seconds when her eyelids began fluttering, then opened. Spike was back to his human face and Buffy was kneeling next to her. “I have to say,” The counselor said weakly, “I didn’t see that one coming.”
Buffy smiled down at her, “Yeah, that’s about how I reacted the first time too.”
“Are you a vampire too?”
“Nope, just Spike.” The slayer said, “You don’t have to be worried though, he’s generally a good guy.”
Lily pushed herself up into a sitting position and accepted the glass of water Spike was handing her, “So,” She began, “Can you explain something for me then…”
Jordan had spent most of the day waiting for a call from Woody telling her he’d apprehended Buffy Summers. When the call came it wasn’t from the person Jordan expected. “Hello?”
“Hey Jordan,” Lily’s voice came over the line. “If I give you an address can you swing by tomorrow?”