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Hellmouth Duty

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Summary: Rube and George have Hellmouth Duty. Crossover with Dead Like Me

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Television > Dead Like MeBrendanMFR181589183,12921 Jun 0421 Jun 04Yes
Title: Hellmouth Duty
Part: 1/1
Author: BrendanM

Summary: Rube and George have Hellmouth Duty. Crossover with Dead Like Me.

Rating: R

Spoilers: Season 5 of BtVS, Season 1 of DLM.

* Timeline for this installment: JUST before the vamp
* dusting scene at the beginning of “The Gift”

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Archive:,, and

I don't own this stuff. Joss Whedon and whoever owns Dead Like Me do. No cash made, just fun had. I promise I won't break 'em, and I'll put 'em back in the case when I'm done.


Rube was cooking dinner when the weekly envelope arrived.

He pulled the contents out and glanced over them.



The next morning, when he and his reapers met at Der Waffle Haus for their daily assignments, he broke the bad news.

“We’ve got Hellmouth Duty again.”

Everyone but George swore. Loudly.

Roxy was the first to pipe up. “I ain’t going again. ‘Sides, you can’t take my little metermaid car on the freeway.”

The others were spouting similar excuses. Mason had gone down two years ago when their last Hellmouth assignment had come along, and Rube wasn’t sure he wanted Daisy anywhere near Sunnydale.

That left him and Georgia. And Georgia wasn’t experienced enough to do the thing alone.

“Looks like it’s just you and me, Peanut.”


On the way down to California, Rube explained the other reapers’ reactions to the newest member of his crew.

“The Hellmouth is not a nice place, Peanut. They’ve got Vampires and all of the other things that go bump in the night.”

George paled. “Vampires?”

“Vampires,” he confirmed.

“Holy shit.” She sat in silence for a few minutes, wrapping her brain around that. “Who’s the appointment?”

He handed her a yellow sticky note with black sharpie on it.

“B. Summers. Magic Box, Sunnydale, CA. OSC 5/24/2001 7:55 PM. What’s this OSC thing?”

“Optimal Soul Collection,” he replied. “One of the perks of coming down here. They tell us when to take the soul to avoid entanglements.”

“What kind of entanglements?”

“The kind that eat reapers for breakfast.”

“Oh. Those kind of entanglements.”


They pulled up outside of the small shop in the small Californian town.

“We’re right on time.”

They exited the truck and entered the building; which was where they were assaulted by an extremely odd, extremely perky saleswoman.

“Oooh! Customers! Hello! Is there anything I can help you with?”

“Yes, we’re looking for a B. Summers,” George replied.

The perky blonde’s attitude did a one-eighty. “Why?” She seemed to be assessing them.

“We really need to talk to B. Summers,” the female reaper responded.

Rube looked around and saw a newspaper clipping of an obituary on the glass counter. He swiftly skimmed through it as his protégé argued with the saleswoman.

“We need to see Buffy about her younger sister. Aside from that, I cannot go into any more detail,” he interrupted Georgia. “I am Doctor McAllister of Child and Family Services, and this is Miss White.”

A look of dawning understanding took residence on the woman’s face.

“Oh! You’re here about Dawnie! I’ll be right back.” With that, she turned on her heel and loped into the back room. Moments later, a small athletic blonde came through the door. “Yes, what can I do for you?”

The two reapers introduced themselves and shook her hand. Georgia popped Buffy’s soul while she had a hold of her.

Rube managed to bullshit his way through the “interview”, and then he and George left the building.

“Let’s get the fuck out of here, Peanut. This place still gives me the creeps.”


Buffy walked back into the training room.

Giles asked, “What was that all about?”

“Social workers.”


“What’d I miss?”


The End.

The End

You have reached the end of "Hellmouth Duty". This story is complete.

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