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Boy, That's Good Coffee

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This story is No. 4 in the series "The Coffee Series". You may wish to read the series introduction and the preceeding stories first.

Summary: The Scoobies head to Philadelphia, see someone they didn’t expect, and find themselves less than welcome. Fourth in the Coffee Series. 4th in the Coffee series

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Television > Boy Meets WorldbastardsnowFR1537,35101013,31216 Oct 0418 Oct 04Yes

Boy, That's Good Coffee

Title: Boy, That’s Good Coffee

Rating: 13

Author: Bastard Snow

Summary: The Scoobies head to Philadelphia, see someone they didn’t expect, and find themselves less than welcome. 4th in the Coffee Series.

A/N: Okay, I was flipping through channels a couple months ago and found Boy Meets World. Got re-hooked, decided to write a fic. Oh. And there’s going to be two more Coffee fics at least. They’re planned-ish (I know the crossovers). Don’t know how soon they’ll be out though. And as always, thanks to Drake for editing.

Also, don’t forget to join Drake and my Yahoo!Group “PurtyYellowGoatSnow” at There you can find exclusive insights (like the conversation that eventually turned into “About That Bomb” and the never-used alternate beginning for “More Than A Calling.”) and all sorts of other cool stuff.

Once again, that’s:

Disclaimer: I don’t own either of these series

Feedback: Yes, please!


Dancing was always fun, at least that was what she had said. He listened to her, like he always… well, almost always… okay, occasionally did. But the point was he had gone along this time. She had promised it would be fun, they would enjoy themselves, maybe meet people their own age. And okay, they were only back in Philadelphia for a few days, but that didn’t mean they couldn’t meet people. New people, and more importantly, fun people. Instead, here they were, in the alley outside the club, with some freaky-faced people who looked like they wanted to inflict pain. Lots and lots of pain. And they were growling. Who growls?

“You guys just never give up, do you?” said a voice from the darkness. He turned his head and saw a short pretty blonde girl. She was wearing a slinky red dress, and heels that enhanced some of her more feminine features, and she was holding a wooden stick. But she was too thin. Why were girls always making themselves so thin? They had very little in the way of curves when they were that thin. Curves were nice. His wife had curves.

Interesting. The freaky-face guys were distracted by her. In fact, they were concentrating completely on her. Why? Were they not good enough? Not good enough to be brutally beaten and possibly killed and why was he complaining again? But here was this small girl, who was now going to be killed, and being a man, he couldn’t let that happen.

“Listen, you,” he said, grabbing the closer freaky-faced guy on the shoulder. “You had better not try anything funny.”

A quick shove saw him back against the wall.

“After,” said freaky-faced guy number one. “We will eat you after we deal with this one.”

“Don’t pay attention to him,” the blonde said. “They’re not going to be eating anyone ever again.”

He looked down at his wife, who was just waking up from being knocked out. Such a firecracker, that one. Always standing up to people, always doing what’s right. He knelt down and put his arms around her, protectively.

“You will not survive the night, Slayer,” said freaky-faced guy number two.

“Yes, I will,” she said. “And I’m not even going to fight you.”

“Then you will die.”

Suddenly, a couple of arrows shot through the night air and pierced the chests of the two freaky-faced guys. The two weirdo’s disintegrated into dust and ash.

“See, that’s always the mistake,” said a tall blond man, limping out of the shadows, holding what looked to be a crossbow.

“Yeah,” said a slightly shorter dark-haired man with an eye-patch, also holding a crossbow. “You never want to threaten her life. That’s not gonna go over so well.”

“Thanks guys,” said the blonde girl. “I could have taken them, but in this dress? I definitely could have been arrested for indecent exposure.”

“That’s what you get, Buffster,” said the brown-haired guy. “Next time maybe think about wearing some underwear.”

“Hello!” said the girl who was apparently Buffster. “I totally would have had lines showing. Can’t have that.”

“Um, excuse me? Hi, just wondering what’s going on here.”

The two men shared a look.

“Hey, buddy,” the blond said, “it’s your job. I’m just along for the ride, tonight.”

“Yeah, besides,” said Buffster, “Sam was complaining about us taking you away from her.”

The brunet rolled his eye. “Fine. But when I get back inside, you’re telling me where you hid that stake.”

The blonde winked at him, and blew him a kiss over her shoulder. “Play your cards right and I might even show you.”

“I didn’t know you guys were together,” the blond man said, as he started to follow the girl.

“We’re not,” said One-Eye.

“So that was…”

“Buffy’s a tease.”

“Ah. I’ll see you inside.”

The brunet nodded, and turned to the young couple who were just getting back to your feet. He smiled warmly at them.

“Are you guys okay?” he asked. He pulled his keys from his pocket, and clicked on a small blue light that made everyone seem alien, but did a good job of lighting up the night. It was a very useful thing to carry around if you were planning on saving someone in a dark alley.

“No,” said the woman. “No, I am very much not okay. Those, those men… things just attacked us and then that woman stopped them and then they got shot and then they disappeared, and I don’t know what’s happening, so no, no, I am not okay.”

“Uh. I meant physically.”

“Yes,” the man said. “Physically, we are okay, except my hand won’t stop shaking, and she has a boo-boo.”

The one-eyed man nodded and pulled a Band-Aid from his pocket. Holding the light in his teeth, he gently applied the bandage to the wound. “Don’t worry about that, it’s just a scratch,” he said. “And don’t worry about your hand, either. That happens sometimes. It should go away in a little while.”

“So, what was that?” the man asked. “What just happened?”

“That?” asked One-Eye. “That was a thing. You don’t need to worry about it. If you want to live a happy life, then go home and forget this ever happened. Or convince yourselves you were drunk. Something. Never think about this night again.”

“You saved our lives,” the girl said.

“Yeah,” said One-Eye.

“You don’t even know us,” said the man.

“Nope,” said One-Eye.

“Why would you risk your lives for strangers?”

“You want to understand two things,” One-Eye said. “We do this all the time, and we weren’t *really* risking our lives.”

“You still saved ours,” said the girl. “At least let us buy you drinks. Something.”

“Yeah,” said the man. “We feel… we owe you, we should do… something.”

“Listen, you don’t have to do anything,” he said. “I’m telling you. Forget this. Go home and when you wake up, convince yourselves this was all a dream.”

“We can’t,” said the man. “I mean it, you don’t know us. We won’t be able to let this go until we do… something.”

One-Eye raised his hands and eye to the sky in a questioning manner. He shook his head and sighed.

“Fine,” he said. “Come in, meet the guys, maybe buy a round, and then please, let it go.”

“We’ll try,” said the woman.

One-Eye waved the couple along behind him, and they followed.

“Hey,” said the man. “What’s your name?”

One-Eye turned around. “Xander,” he said. “Xander Harris. You?”

“I’m Corey,” said the man. “Corey Matthews. This is my wife Topanga.”

“Matthews, huh? Nice to meet you,” Xander said, shaking both of their hands. “Come on. Let’s get this over with.”

* * * * * *

“What is he… I thought he was going to do the whole sending them home thing!” Buffy protested, as she saw Xander leading the two near-victims towards their table.

She turned to Riley to ask his opinion, but then remembered he had gone to the bathroom. She pouted, waiting for either him or Sam, who had gone to get a drink, to get back to the table, but Xander and the newcomers reached them first. Buffy looked at Xander expectantly.

“Buffy,” Xander said. “Hey.”

“Xander,” she said, her voice low and on the cusp of anger.

“This,” Xander said, “is Corey and Topanga. Matthews.”

Buffy looked up at him, then back to the couple.

“Corey and Topanga Matthews,” Xander said, “meet Buffy Summers.”

“We just,” Corey said, looking at his wife, “wanted to thank you for, you know, saving our lives.”

“They really, really do,” Xander said. “No stopping them.”

“Hey,” said Sam Finn, approaching the table with a Fuzzy Navel in her hand. “Who’s this?”

“Sam Finn,” Xander said, “meet victims number one and two, also known as Corey and Topanga Matthews.”

“Matthews,” Sam said. “Fun.”

“Fun?” Corey asked.

“Say,” Xander said. “Would you folks happen to know someone named Morgan?”

Corey looked up. “I have a sister named Morgan. Why?”

Xander looked at Buffy pointedly, and the young woman pulled out her cell phone.

“Is she, like, between the ages of eleven and fifty?” Xander asked.

“She’s seventeen. Why?”

“Hey, Willow?” Buffy said into her phone. “Give it up. We just met the older brother. …Well, I’m sorry, how was I supposed to know? You said we should come!”

“Is there… something special about my sister?” Corey asked.

“Have you talked to her much recently?” Xander asked.

“Not a lot, no. We live in New York, we were actually just coming down for a few days to visit.”

“She been acting weird, that you know of?” Xander asked as Riley re-approached the table. “Hey, Riley. Corey and Topanga Matthews. This is Riley Finn.”

“Hi,” Corey said, as Topanga shook hands with Riley. “Why are you interested in my sister?”

“We represent an all-girls school,” Xander said, reaching into his jacket. He pulled a card from the inside pocket and handed it to Corey. “We’d like to talk to your sister about maybe attending.”

“Oh,” Corey said.

“Is the school at all prestigious?” Topanga asked.

“Our principal is the former curator of the British Museum,” Xander said.

“And,” Buffy said, having finished her conversation with Willow, “we’ve got a revolutionary curriculum.”

“My… parents aren’t wealthy…” Corey said, appealing for support from Topanga with one hand.

“Money’s not an issue,” Xander said. He pulled a pen and another card from his pocket, and flipped the card over. “Would it be possible to get their address? Or a phone number?”

“Um. I don’t… can we have, like, a minute?” Corey asked.

“Sure,” Xander said. “Take as much time as you need.” He turned to Buffy as Corey and Topanga moved a few feet away from them. “Is she going to be joining the happy-fun-dancing time?”

“If she can get dressed in time,” Buffy said. “Never know, with her.”

“So either she’ll be here in five minutes, or we’ll meet her on the way out. Fun.”

“Yup. Buy me a drink?”

Xander rolled his eye, and went in search of the bar.


End Chapter 1
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