Title : Man Of Tweed
Author : Booster
Rating : PG-13
Summary: All Giles wants is to sort out the Council’s accounts. Unfortunately, he’s in Metropolis, so face it – he doesn’t stand a chance. (Superman crossover. Part of Jinni’s 20 minutes with Giles Challenge.)
Disclaimer : Buffy and the gang belong to Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy. Superman and Metallo are copyright DC Comics. I own nothing.
Setting: Set after Buffy season 7.
Distribution: Twisting the Hellmouth, FanFiction.Net, if anyone else wants it, just email and ask.
Feedback: Yes, please.
Dedicated to Tara Keezer on her birthday. Many Happy Returns!!!
He was starting to detest these trips around the country. Travelling around, tracking down all the different accounts that the Council had in all those different cities, was starting to tire him.
Still, he had to admit that Metropolis was one of the more interesting looking places to visit so far. It was cleaner than normal, and the people seemed friendlier than the normal Americans he had to deal with, if a little inclined to ask what he was brought up to consider impertinent questions.
Sighing, Giles pushed his glasses up his nose, and hailed a taxi. Just as he was climbing inside, a red streak shot through the air along the street, causing a great gust of wind to blow everyone around, and disappeared off into the distance. “It’s Superman!” shouted several bystanders, pointing excitedly towards the streak.
Rolling his eyes, Giles shook his head, and climbed into the cab. Really, these superheroes were most over-rated. “The MetroBank on 7th Street, please,” he said.
“Sure thing, bud!” smiled the cabbie. “Say, that was Superman! Wonder where he’s off to!” Giles sank back into the seat, and prayed that this would be a short journey.
Twenty minutes later, and a long lecture on just how much Superman had done for Metropolis, Giles was at the MetroBank. Twenty minutes after that and he’d just finished presenting his credentials to the sceptical, but now convinced Advisor at the Bank.
Sitting back in his chair, and sipping from his glass of water, Giles wondered if Buffy and the others back in Cleveland knew just how much he’d prefer to be back there hunting demons right now, rather than dealing with these pinstriped financial sharks. At least you could hit the demons…
Plastering a smile on his face as the Account Manager re-entered the room, Giles started to inquire about formally taking over as the account holder when the building shook. There was a loud noise, and the wall next to Giles shook again, harder this time. “What on earth?” said Giles, and hurried to the door.
Looking into the main section of the bank, Giles saw people screaming and running from the large hulking figure snarling in the middle. The figure was about seven feet tall, made of some kind of metal, and with glowing green eyes. A security guard pointed his gun at what Giles assumed was a robot, only to have his gun ripped away and himself to be thrown across the room.
Luckily, the security guard was stopped from crashing into a wall by the red and blue streak suddenly catching him. Placing the guard carefully behind him, Superman walked slowly forward towards his adversary. “Robbing a bank, Metallo? That’s a little petty even for you.”
Metallo snarled again and threw one of the nearby desks at Superman who easily caught it. “All I want Superman - is your death!” Metallo shouted, and leapt towards Superman, punching with one of his massive metal arms.
Superman staggered as the blow hit, but quickly recovered. “Upgrade all you like, Metallo – you still won’t defeat me!” he said, melting the large metal hand with a quick blast from his heat vision.
“I didn’t go to all this trouble to set off alarms to attract your attention, and not have a plan, Kryptonian!” said Metallo, as a plate in his chest slid open and a sickly green glow shone out. There, sitting in the middle of a number of circuits and machinery, was a glowing green rock.
Giles sighed loudly, and waited for the inevitable defeat, ignoring the Account Manager’s attempts to drag him back behind the desk in their meeting room. Honestly, Xander and Andrew would never forgive him if he didn’t memorise every little detail.
He frowned, as Superman sank to the floor in obvious agony, sweat beads on his forehead. That wasn’t meant to happen.
Superman raised one arm upwards in pain. “Kryptonite! But... But how?” he gasped.
“Yes, Superman!” Metallo exclaimed. “The only element that can kill you! You under-estimated just how much Luthor hates you that he was willing to share his last stock of it!” He laughed a strangely metallic laugh. “And now you die, Superman! And Metropolis will be ours!!!”
Oh, for god’s sake, that was more than enough – he still had one more stop on this damn US tour to go, and the jet-lag was starting to make him irritable. Marching back into the meeting room, Giles picked up the jug of water from the table and exited. Crossing the rubble strewn main foyer, Giles walked over to the two figures frozen in their strange tableaux, and knocked politely on the back of Metallo.
“What?” said Metallo surprised, and automatically swung round towards Giles. Giles smiled, said “Coming through!” and ducked under the robotic arm. Seeing the open chest plate, Giles immediately threw the contents of the water jug over the exposed circuitry and watched it short out.
Metallo screamed in agony, and reared up in pain. Choosing his moment carefully, Giles reached in, and snatched the piece of Kryptonite out from all its connections. Turning and looking down at the prone Superman, who was looking up with an amazed expression on his face, Giles just smiled. “All yours,” he said, and walked off whistling happily and juggling the Kryptonite.
As he re-entered the meeting room, Giles could clearly hear the cry of “Nooooooo!” from behind him and the solid thump of fists hitting metal time and again. Sitting down in his soft chair, he raised one eyebrow at the Account Manager peeking out from under the table. Placing the Kryptonite on the table, Giles just looked at him until shamefaced, he scrambled up and brushed the dust off his suit.
“Now then,” Giles spoke in his softest, most biting tone, ”Now that that distraction is over with, do you suppose I might be allowed access to my own funds?”
As the bank employee’s rushed around him, Giles permitted himself a small smile as he looked at the Kryptonite. Now, that was going to make a good
souvenir. He couldn’t wait to see Xander’s face when he got back to Cleveland.
Just the Gotham City trip to go.