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Jethro and the Garden Gnome

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Summary: Response to Challenge #8 on the NCIS Special Ops site. Buffy meets Gibbs. Banter ensues.

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
NCIS > Buffy-CenteredcrazedcrusaderFR1316573138,6319 Dec 049 Dec 04Yes
Response to Challenge #8 on the NCIS
Special Ops site. Also a Buffy/NCIS crossover.
What can I say? I’m evil. Buffy is Joss Whedon’s, and
NCIS is Donald Bellesario’s. I’m pretty sure. Anyway,
they’re not mine.

Yes, 'The clock struck midnight' is the last line. It was part of the challenge. Sorry!


Jethro and the Garden Gnome

By the Crazed Crusader



“What do you mean, ‘Where’s the
body?’” she asked, eyeing him with a very convincing expression of wide-eyed
innocence. “What body?”

Gibbs rolled his eyes, not at all convinced. He’d shot the mugger in the heart, after all, and had seen the body hit the ground. Usually he wouldn’t have gone for the kill, but the crazy son of a bitch had actually tried to bite him, so all bets were off. But then he’d passed out for a little bit, and when he came to, the body was gone and there was a short, cute, lying teenaged blonde girl standing in front of him. Save me from teenaged girls. “I shot him in the heart, Miss…”

“Miss! Exactly. You missed,” she said, flashing a wide smile and blatantly ignoring his attempt to learn her name. “I wouldn’t worry about it though, I’m sure it happens all
the time.”

“Not to me,” Gibbs growled, and flashed his badge at her. “I’m NCIS, and I don’t miss.”

She raised her eyebrows and peered at his badge. “‘Jethro?’” she snickered softly. “No wonder you’re so uptight.”

“Excuse me?” Gibbs said incredulously. Uptight? I’ll show you uptight! “Look, kid…”

“Don’t call me that! I’m not a kid!” she said indignantly.

“Oh, please. You’re what? 12?”

The noise she made was actually vaguely alarming. “I’m 16.”

“Sixteen? You can’t be. I’ve seen garden gnomes that were taller than you.” She made another infuriated noise, and he smirked. “And you never answered my question. I didn’t miss, I saw the bullet go in. Where’s the body?

“You’ve lost a lot of blood, Sir. You really ought to sit down,” the blonde said, continuing to evade his question. “The man who attacked you ran away after you missed.”

“Look, I haven’t lost that much blood, and I know what I saw. I’ve been given the runaround by way more convincing actors than you,” Gibbs said. “I didn’t miss, I saw him go down, now tell me…”

This latest demand for information was interrupted when the tiny, delicate-looking blonde reached out, grabbed him by the back of the shirt, and threw him a good five feet through the air. He landed in an undignified heap that he was very glad none of his coworkers could see, but recovered quickly, rolling over onto his back and reaching for his sidearm. That
reflexive action stopped when he saw the petite blonde fighting three men, all of them much bigger than her. From the first second he saw them, he could tell that it was a grossly unfair fight.

She kicked their asses. It was obvious that all four of them had martial arts training, and even more obvious that the girl’s was the most extensive. She moved like nothing he’d ever seen, fluid and graceful, and he was just starting to think he’d seen everything when she struck one of them in the chest and he exploded into dust. This was enough of a shock that he lay there, flat on his back, gaping as she finished the other two off in a similar manner. When they were gone, she turned to him, her eyebrows raised. “You OK, Jethro?”

“What the Hell just happened?” he demanded by way of a response. “He…and there was…what the Hell was that?”

She smirked. “Believe me, you don’t wanna know,” she said cheerfully. “See you around, Jethro.”

“Hang on a minute, you can’t just…leave…” Gibbs trailed off into silence as the blonde seemed to disappear, melting into the shadows behind her. “Damnit!”

The clock struck midnight.

The End

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