For Want of a Rider
For Want of a RiderBuffy lay in bed that night staring at the ceiling. She was thinking about Harry. There were just things about him. She understood him and he understood her. But she wished that she could understand how. She sighed again. Her thoughts drifted to Spike. She smiled in spite of herself.
“Buffy.”
Buffy sneezed. She was so hopped up on ‘muggle’ cold medicine and ‘Wizarding’ cold medicine that she must have been hallucinating.
“Buffy.”
She stared. “You’re not real.”
“I’m not?”
“You’re dead.”
“Yah. I am.”
Buffy sat up.
“Go on. Touch me.”
Buffy looked into his eyes. She got out of bed and stuck out her hand.
He stuck his hand out to meet hers. She gasped when she felt air.
“Believe me yet. Luv?”
Buffy closed her eyes.
“Say it again.”
“Listen to me pet.”
“I’m listening.”
“Let me go.”
Buffy’s eyes snapped open. “What?”
He smiled again. His bright eyes sparkled.
“It’s time Buffy.”
“Don’t.” She sighed.
“Call me Buffy.”
“Is this what you really want?” Buffy asked.
He shook his head. “It’s what you want.”
“How can I want something that I don’t know about?”
He just stared. She put up her hands.
“Bad question. I know.”
He just smiled at her.
“It freaks me out to see you acting like this, ya know?”
He smiled again.
“I’m not kidding! When, in the time I’ve known you, have you ever been this…”
“Compassionate?” He volunteered.
She nodded.
“Slayer. It’s time.”
“But why?”
He looked at her door. “Because there are some people out there who deserve you.”
“What?”
“He feels it too.”
“Who?”
“I’m giving you permission Buffy.”
“What?”
“You can move on now.”
“From what? You? God you are so conceited!”
“Buffy” he cut her off.
“Go to him. He just found out.”
“Stop talking in circles!”
“It’s over. It’s time for you to move on and find love again.”
“But-”
“Listen to me luv. There is a perfectly normal, live man out there who just found out that he loves you. Now stop beating yourself up over some undead vampire and go to him.”
Buffy smiled a little. “That’s more like it.”
He turned to go.
“Wait.”
He looked back at her.
“I love you.”
He walked over to her.
“No you don’t.”
“Shut up. This is different. I thought I was going to lose you. And now. I think you’re right.”
“I’m right? Nice change.”
“I need to get over you.”
“That’s a good slayer. I’ll be watching over you.”
“Really?”
He put a hand on the doorknob and opened the door.
“Thanks Spike.”
“Anytime luv.” And with that he disappeared.
Buffy turned to look out the window. He had seemed so different. So happy. So complete. She smiled. Maybe he was right. Maybe it was time for her to be happy too. She ran out of the room and down the hall. She’d gotten to the end of the hall when she realized that she didn’t know where his room was.
“Buffy?”
She turned around.
“Harry!”
