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Moth to Flame

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Summary: Xander sits in a hospital room, pondering his attraction to his fiance (and the rest of the people in his life). X/D.

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
BtVS/AtS Non-Crossover > Romance > Dawn/Xander(Recent Donor)CaptainBoulangerFR131439032,8741 Jan 051 Jan 05Yes
(Disclaimer: Nothing from BTVS is mine, of course. The plot is. Enjoy.)

Moth to Flame

I sit here, between bright white flourescents and equally bright white linoleum, watching liquid dripping into a tube that threads over a bed rail and into an arm, pondering my life. Leaning forward in my chair, I once again grasp the hand attached to that arm, and feel nothing. Coldness. I sigh, leaning back, pulling myself out of range, breaking contact with that unnatural, deathly cold.

Not that I haven't felt it before. I feel this all the time. Most people feel like this to me, actually. Because what I wasn't feeling just there isn't body heat, it's magic. And every woman in my life has had it, in some fashion or other - except Cordelia, but that was just a mistake; I was looking for someone as "normal" as me, I think.

I realized that a few hours ago, when Willow came to sit with us. Her long red hair - since Sunnydale she hasn't cut it, and now it cascades down just to her belt - simply screams happy warm magic to me, just as I realize she always had. I've been drawn to her, like a moth to flame, since that day in kindergarten and the yellow crayon. Buffy was like that too - I was drawn to her from the day we met. And Anya. And Faith. All the Slayers, really. Miss Callender. Even Buffy's mother had a trickle of it. And the mummy girl, and the evil sub, and even Drusilla. And there's been a fair number of men like that too, though Giles was the first I met.

I turn back, looking at Dawn in the bed, her hair mussed from the pillows, IV tube in her arm, Willow's get-well stuffed animal tucked under the other arm. That must be why, I reason. Of course it would be - like a moth to flame. After a lifetime of being drawn to girls with a bit of magic - okay, in some, more than a bit - I've wound up engaged to the biggest magic-ball of them all.

But tonight, I don't feel it. I don't feel her. I close my eyes, and the only presence I sense is Willow. Willow says it's because of the morphine and the pain from the surgery. I can't stand it, and I don't care why it is. I just want to make it better. And I don't know what to do but sit here and wait for her to start glowing again. And the waiting is driving me insane.

Someone tell me where the matches are? Please?

The End

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