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Laughing at Second Chances

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This story is No. 1 in the series "Xander and Harley Quinn". You may wish to read the series introduction first.

Summary: Harley is getting a second chance after the Tim Drake arc in Batman Beyond: Return of the Joker.

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
DC Universe > Batman > Xander-CenteredEdScottFR131112,11711364,09018 Mar 0518 Mar 05Yes

Final Chapter

Title: Laughing at Second Chances (11/?)
Author: Ed Scott

Disclaimer: All characters belong to their rightful owners... none of
who are me.

Summary: Harley is getting a second chance after the Tim Drake arc in Batman Beyond: Return of the Joker.

Warning: Crossovers: All things Batman, except the Adam West show and Superfriends.

Pairing: X/Harley Quinn

A/N: There will be some _minor_ Buffy bashing in this part. You have been warned.

Rating: PG 13

Feedback, It's the coin of the realm.

Xander and Harley smiled at Buffy. Buffy was amazingly upset. One of her friends has lied to her, and she wants to know why. Their smiles only made her angrier.

“Hello, Buff. How are you this fine evening?” Xander was hoping the small talk would calm her down. He was wrong.

“Why was Batman here? Who is that guy shooting lasers out of his eyes? And what is going on?”

“Batman is here because of something Haley did. The guy shooting lasers you will have to figure out for yourself. That is, you can. The smartest women in the world haven’t figured it out yet.” He turned to Harley, “at least I didn’t mention the bleach seeping into her brain. If you want to know what is going on here, let’s go to my apartment. Ok?” Buffy nodded. On the way there, she called Willow and asked her to meet them there. Willow was there first.

Xander’s Apartment

Xander used the bathroom in his room. It was a ruse so Xander could put his revolver in the back of his pants. He knew Buffy and he knew how she would react when she finds out momentarily.

“What is going on here. It all started two days ago. I was at the Espresso Pump waiting for my friends that never showed. This nice woman asked if she could join me for coffee. I agreed. We walked and talked, and got to know each other. We had a nice dinner, and even got to kill a couple of vampires. It was a nice first date. Haley was doing some impressive acrobatics. After the vampires were dust, I wanted to know why she was a gymnast. We went back to her place and she told me everything.” Buffy and Willow were intrigued by Xander’s story.

“Her name is not Haley Quatermaine. Her real name is Harleene Quinzel. And by your reaction Willow, she is who she is.” Xander stood up. “For years, she went by the name Harley Quinn. For you Buffy, she was the Joker’s girlfriend.” True to form, Buffy stood up. Ready to attack Harley. She would have, if she didn’t see Xander’s revolver right in her face. “Sit down, Buffy. We are going to talk this over like adults, and no one will get hurt. Understand?” Buffy nodded as she sat down. She was wondering where Xander got a gun.
“The reason Batman was here was because Superman spotted her. Batman was on a vengeance kick. You see, the Joker wanted a son. So, he kidnapped Robin. After torturing, drugging and shocking him, they broke his mind and reshaped it. They turned him into a Joker Junior. After the ensuing battle, Harley fell down a hole and died.” He turned to Harley and noticed that she was starting to feel uncomfortable. He went to her, and put his hand on her shoulder. This little bit of contact was enough to make her feel better.

“When she woke up, she was in Purgatory. Here she met the balance demon Whistler. You told us about him once. He showed Harley my life and gave her a choice. Either stay in Purgatory isolated for all eternity or return to earth and be my friend. Obviously, she chose to return and get a second chance.”

“But she doesn’t deserve a second chance, Xander. She should be in jail.”

Xander walked right up to Buffy and looked her right in the eyes. What she saw in his eyes made her wish she could bury herself further into the chair. “Like Angel did? After you released his soul, he killed sixty people, including Miss Calendar. He tortured Giles and tried to end the world. All you wanted was your boyfriend back. The world be damned. Yet, when he returned, he got a second chance. So why is it ok for you to choose who gets a second chance and who doesn’t?”

“I’m the Slayer. I knew Angel was back with his soul.”

“How do you know he had his soul? Did you ask him or did you go with blind luck and hope? Face it, Buff. You do not have a say in this. I do. It’s my choice. It’s my life. I still want to be friends, but if you can’t get over the fact of who Harley was, then that is your problem. Not mine.”

“She can hurt you, Xander. You need to be protected. You are the normal one.”

“For the love of God. I have saved your life just as many times or more than you have saved mine. You wouldn’t have lasted two days in this town if I didn’t pull you up into that ventilator shaft. You would have stayed dead after the Master drowned you. I had to force Angel to take me to his lair. I did not care whether I lived or not. I cared about you. In fact, I loved you. But now, my love for you is like a sister. When you were sick with the flu, Angelus showed up to kill you. I got rid of him. When you were knocked into the swim team’s pool, I pulled you out. And I even saved the world once.”

Willow asked, “When?”

“When the Sisterhood of Jhe tried to open the Hellmouth. While you were in the library, I was in the basement stopping Jack O’Toole who was a zombie, from blowing up the school with a bomb. While the Hellmouth was open.” He turned to Willow. “If the school blew up while the Hellmouth was open, what might have happened?”

Willow thought about it, and her face went pale. “If the school blew up before we closed the Hellmouth, it would have stayed open. Nothing would have stopped it. The world would be finished. Was I really that bad of a friend to you over the last year?”

“No, not really. You were just growing up. You were going in a direction that I wasn’t. It’s ok, I understand it. I didn’t like it, because it was lonely. It would have been nice if you included me in your lives, but I have a new friend now. I will be applying for a job with the Sunnydale Construction Company on Monday. I am going to try and see where my friendship with Harley goes. But most importantly, I want the three of us to be friends again. You two, I mean you three, are the world to me. My life means nothing if you all are not in it.” After he said that, he was assaulted by three screaming women. They were trying to hug him to death. Xander did not joke about this. His mind was on permanent shutdown. He just stood there and enjoyed the hug. Right now, all was right in the world.

The End

You have reached the end of "Laughing at Second Chances". This story is complete.

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