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A Magical Kind of Comedy

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Summary: COMPLETE. A Slayer is activated at Hogwarts and Xander is sent to train her. Of course, Andrew comes along. Slash. XH/RL, AW/SS, S/?, GW/?, NL/?

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Harry Potter > Multiple Pairings > HumorfrkwerewolfFR15538,300111110,92818 Mar 0517 Apr 05Yes

part 1b

A Magical Kind of Comedy, Part 1b


"What is it with this place and their brick walls?" Andrew asked, trying to be quiet. This of course caused half of the train station's patrons to glance over.

"It's a good cover up, dear." Molly replied. "Besides, muggles can't access the platform."

"Then how am I suppose to get over there?" Xander asked nervously, reaching up and adjusting his eye patch for the fiftieth time that morning.

"I don't think there will be a problem with that, Xander." Remus said. Xander fought down the instinct to jump at the sound of the soft voice behind him. Remus smiled slightly at the reaction. "You seem to have a certain level of magic."

"Me? Magic?" Xander snorted.

"It's a residue effect of being born of the Hellmouth." Andrew announced with a wise look. "Every resident had the ability to do a certain level of magic. It's just different with each person. I can't do any of Willow's magic, but I can summon a league of demons for my bidding."

"I'm not magical, Andrew." Xander insisted, feeling uncomfortable with the conversation.

"You're a rock." Andrew said.


"You can withstand a great load. You're the support others need." Andrew replied. "Not everyone can handle all the stuff you've had to deal with. That's your magic."

"That's not magic." Xander told him.

"Well, walk through the wall and see." Andrew said, his voice threatening to turn whiney. Xander sighed and stared down the small brick wall that separated one train platform from another. Supposedly, Platform Nine and Three-Quarters was on the other side.

"If I run into anything solid, you're to be blamed." Xander pointed at Andrew. Andrew's blue eyes widened slightly, before darting around and avoiding his gaze.

Taking a deep breath, Xander stepped up to the wall and walked right through it. He came out on the other side, facing a large space buzzing with young teens. A few parents could be seen here and there, but the majority were clusters of students chatting and laughing together. Stationed at the platform was a large, sleek train. Xander gazed up at it in awe.

"See! I was right." Andrew bounced up behind him, followed by their large troupe of redheads. Remus came up the rear, his eyes gazing calmly across the area.

"Yeah, yeah." Xander muttered, tearing his eyes away from Remus.

"All right, everyone." Molly clapped her hands. "You all have a wonderful year. Ron, Harry, and Hermione? Please behave yourselves."

"Mum!" Ron protested.

"Shush, Ron." Molly replied. "Ginny, be good. And remember, just because you're a Slayer now does not mean you should neglect your studies. Xander will be writing me about your progress, so I will know."

"Yeah, okay." Ginny said absently, her eyes not even looking in the direction of her mother. Xander followed her line of sight and spotted a pale blonde who resembled Spike more than Xander appreciated. The blonde was talking to a shorter boy, with sandy blonde hair. Talking was an understatement, for the shorter boy was cringing away from the other. Xander blinked. The pale boy even sneered like Spike.

"Hugs!" Molly demanded, not even bothered by Ginny's lack of interest in her lecture. Hugs were given all around, twice for Andrew due to his sneakiness, and finally the large group were set free to board the train.

Xander knew before Ginny even moved that the moment Molly and Arthur disappeared through the wall that she was heading in the direction of the two blondes. He didn't intercept, but did follow along side her to see what she would do. Andrew followed at a distance, too busy taking in the sights and sounds to really pay attention.

"Leave him alone, Malfoy." Ginny growled in an imitation that matched a wolf perfectly.

"Well, if it isn't the youngest Weasel." Malfoy turned, looking perfectly bored.

"Hey, Neville." Ginny greeted the other boy, who smiled weakly back. Xander fought back a cringe, having seen this scene many times in high school. It was horrible to have your friend, who was a girl, protect you from a bully. Especially when she was a Slayer.

"Hi, Ginny." Neville mumbled.

"Why don't you continue on your merry way, Weasley?" Malfoy suggested, raising an eyebrow. Xander shuddered. He was like a carbon copy of Spike. "Me and Longbottom were having a little chat."

Xander had a sudden flash back to high school. This scene reminded him of many encounters with Larry, who turned out to be, well, gay. And possibly having the hots for Xander himself. Huh. Xander looked pensively at the boy called Malfoy.

"Come on, Neville, let's share a booth." Ginny offered, ignoring Malfoy.

"Bloody female." Draco Malfoy muttered, turning and stalking away.

"Wow, talk about strange. He looks just like-"

"Spike." Xander finished for Andrew. "Yeah, I know. It's creepy. Let's get on the train. I want to sit down."

"And find Remus." Andrew added, smiling sweetly at Xander. Xander glared.


"Are we there yet?" Andrew asked, bouncing around in his seat. Remus held back a smile as Xander sent the blonde a glare.


"How would you know? You've never been there." Andrew pointed out, before darting over to the window.

"I'd suspect they would stop the train if we were there." Xander replied.


Silence descended the compartment.

"....Are we there yet?"

"No!" Xander snapped. Andrew rolled his eyes.

"I was just asking." Andrew pouted. Xander sighed. "So... When will we get there?"


Some things never ceased to amaze Andrew. He couldn't help it. Everything was, really, very shiny and attractive. Life was great, unless you were killing people. Then it's not so fun. ...What was he talking about again? Oh, yeah, things never ceased to amaze him. And this was no different. Hogwarts was a fantasy novel come to life. It had towers and ghosts. Elves and strange creatures. Most of all, it was filled with magic. Andrew could simply feel it.

Andrew was a summoner, after all. It was what he was good at: summoning demons and learning their languages. Though, he didn't get to do that much anymore. He had found that the Watcher's Council, despite their recent upgrades, were still very anti-demon, no matter how helpful one could be. Which left Andrew with the job of secretary -- er, assistant -- to one Xander Harris. Which wasn't so bad, really. Xander was nice and even nicer to look at.

Not that Andrew looked at Xander in that way. Oh, no. His eyes were for Severus Snape and Severus Snape alone. A spark of evil flashed in Andrew's eyes. Oh, yes. He was so going to become Severus' boyfriend.

"Andrew? Why are you cackling like that?" Xander asked, raising an eyebrow at Andrew.

"I wasn't... cackling." Andrew said, in a bad attempt at lying. Xander stared at him a moment, before sharing an amused look with Remus.

"We should get to the Great Hall. The welcoming feast should be starting soon." Remus said. Andrew wanted so badly to roll his eyes at the way Xander beamed at him. He knew he couldn't, knew that he wouldn't. He figured he was just as bad when talking about Severus Snape, the Potions Master. Boy, he loved that title.

After standing in the Great Hall for ten minutes, staring up at the ceiling in awe, the two newcomers finally managed to sit down at the teacher's table. Xander felt decidedly uncomfortable there. Andrew was too busy staring at Severus to realize students kept sending confused looks their way.

"Welcome to another year of Hogwarts!" Albus Dumbledore announced, standing. "I have a small announcement to make before we eat. I would like to welcome back Remus Lupin, who shall be returning to the position of teaching Defense Against the Dark Arts. Let me also introduce two people that I'm sure you will be in contact with at one time or another." Albus gestured for Xander and Andrew to stand. Andrew bounced up to his feet, sending Severus a grin -- who ignored him.

"Calm down." Xander hissed into his ear.

"But isn't this exiting? This place is amazing. It screams with energy and magic." Andrew whispered back. Xander frowned. He couldn't feel anything.

"I would like you all to welcome Alexander Harris and Andrew Wells." Albus introduced. "As many of you are aware, what with the reports in the Daily Prophet, there was a great battle in America not too long ago. These two young men fought alongside the warriors known as Slayers. Now, they come to Hogwarts with a mission, in hopes to aid in one student's destiny."

Silence reigned after this little tale. Students shared looks. Severus rolled his eyes. Xander blushed and turned to Andrew. "A bit dramatic, don't you think?" A chuckled echoed through the hall, too late for Xander to realize he'd spoken loudly. "Uh, oops."

"Say something." Andrew told him. "They are all staring at us."

"Including Snape." Xander whispered. Andrew blushed heavily and Xander felt a small sense of pride in making Andrew turn that red. Clearing his throat, he turned toward the large room of teens. "Uhh, hello tea drinkers of the world! You all can call me Xander. I'm a Watcher... Uh... I... Watch? This is Andrew!"

Andrew squeaked when Xander sat down, leaving the blonde to stand there by himself. He stood there a moment, before turning and digging into his backpack next to his chair. Standing, he produced his camera. Andrew flipped it open and attempted to turn it on. There was the sound of static, then nothing. Andrew's blue eyes opened wide with shock and terror.

"I'm terribly sorry, Mr. Wells, but muggle electronics don't work here." Dumbledore said softly.

"What?" Andrew asked, his lower lip quivering. "Doesn't... work?"

"No, the magic interferes with it." Dumbledore replied. Andrew suddenly fell to his knees, banging his head on the table in the process, and let out a pain filled howl.

"My precious!" He screamed. A thump was heard as Xander banged his head on the table, groaning with embarrassment.


"Was that really necessary?" Remus asked, his voice filled with concern. Xander blushed heavily, holding the packet of numbing ice to his bruised forehead. He watched as Remus settled down in the chair next to his hospital bed, his blush rising when Remus smiled at him.

"It was stupid, but I was hoping to get rid of the ringing that Andrew's screams created."

"I think you just created more ringing." Remus commented. "Here, let me see."

Xander brought the pack away from his head, watching with a wide eye as Remus leaned in close to inspect the whelp. When Remus pulled away, he was smiling. "What?"

"Nothing." Remus said, suddenly looking flustered.

"No, what is it? It's going to leave a mark isn't it? Oh god. Over seven years of fighting off vamps and I'm going to be killed by banging my head on a table." Xander babbled. "Stupid Andrew. Stupid Giles. Making me a Watcher. What the hell was he thinking? What does he put in that tea of his anyway? Why are you looking at me like that? Did you know you have really gold eyes? They are so pretty. Pretty-pretties... Cripes. I think I hit my head too hard."

"Calm down, Xander." Remus ordered, placing his hand on Xander's shoulder. Xander vaguely noticed it was warm.

"Calm. I can do calm." Xander nodded. "Your hand is warm."

"Umm, thank you." Remus gave him a slightly confused look, before standing and gesturing toward the nurse, Madame Pomfrey. "What exactly did you give him?"

"Just a little Hammer Toad Wart." Pomfrey whispered.

"He must have an allergic reaction." Remus said. "He's delirious."

"Nope, I'm fine!" Xander grinned, his eyes starting to glaze over. "Remmie, Remus, Remmie-Rem."

"Yes, Xander?" Remus asked, returning to his side.

"Like your name. Do you have a brother named Romulus? Is that what his name was? I can't really remember..." Xander trailed off, before blinking at him. "You're cute."

"Umm, well, thank you." Remus replied, a soft blush developing on his cheeks. A giggle could be heard behind him by Pomfrey.

"Pretty eyes." Xander mumbled, before falling to sleep with a snore.

"I think he likes you." Pomfrey teased, her eyes twinkling.

"Hmm." Was the werewolf's reaction.

"Come on, Remus." Pomfrey patted his shoulder. "It's rather obvious. Well, he likes your eyes at any rate."

"Yes." Remus muttered, still staring at Xander's sleeping form.

"Hmmm, I think he's not the only one with a crush." Pomfrey said happily. Remus didn't reply.


Andrew carefully straightened his newly acquired robes. Taking a deep breath, he peeked through the small door window. Past the door was a classroom, with a room filled with green and scarlet clothed students and bubbling cauldrons. Andrew felt a moment of giddiness, which he quickly hid. There, inside that classroom, was Severus Snape: Potions Master.

"Who is it?" A velvety voice asked. Andrew blinked in shock at the open door. All his daydreaming had left him unable to notice the events around him, even Severus swinging the door open to glare at him.

"H-hello." Andrew squeaked.

"Oh, it's you." Severus' black eyes looked skyward a moment, before sighing. "Is there a particular reason you are interrupting my class, Mr. Wells?"

"Please, call me Andrew." He replied, trying to look suave. The result was, of course, a constipated expression. When Severus moved to shut the door in his face, Andrew bounced to attention. "Wait! I just wanted to take a look into your class. I mean, I've done some magic and all, but never really dived into the amazing world of potions. I'm more of the ritual kind of guy."

"Indeed." Severus said, before holding the door open. Andrew slipped past him with a blushing smile. Severus watched the young man as he immediately begin darting around the room. A foul look crossed his face.

The day really had gone down hill.

Shaking his head slightly, Severus swept to the front of the room and proceeded to watch the idiots known as students attempt to brew a potion. Andrew bounced around him, peering into Potter's cauldron, tutting, and then proceeding to the next one. Andrew tutted again. At the next cauldron, he made a distressed noise.

"Is there a problem, Mr. Wells?" Severus asked. "If the smell bothers you, feel free-"

"No!" Andrew shook his head. "It's just... Well, they aren't measuring the Dragon's Horn properly. If they keep brewing at this rate, then when they add the final ingredient the potion will explode."

"Potter!" Severus snapped. "How much Dragon's Horn did you add to your cauldron?"

"Three teaspoons." Harry replied softly. Severus gritted his teeth.


"T-the s-s-same." Neville stuttered out.

"Tell me, class, which of you used the correct amount of seen teaspoons of Dragon's Horn?" Severus asked, crossing his arms. Only a few Slytherin's, and Hermione, raised their hands. Severus' eyes narrowed. "All students who used less than the required amount will clean their supplies, dump out the potion, and write me a two foot essay on why you should have used more Dragon's Horn." A groan swept through the room. "Those of you that have a brain will bottle your potions and continue your brewing on Friday. Class is dismissed."

Once the last student left the classroom, Severus tried hard to ignore Andrew's presence. The blonde boy -- no, really more of a man -- kept hovering over him as he graded his papers. Letting out a sigh of agitation, Severus looked up at Andrew.

"May I help you?" Severus asked through gritted teeth.

"Oh, nothing." Andrew said, sighing softly. Severus decided he needed to draw the man's attention away from staring at his nose.

"Do tell, how is it you knew that the amount of Dragon's Horn was wrong?" Severus asked, shuffling his papers in an attempt to not look curious.

"Oh, well, you see when you summon a fire demon of some sort it's best to add a large quantity of Dragon's Horn to your ritual. It helps keep the demon from catching everyone on fire or causing explosions. It only made sense that the same would apply to potions." Andrew explained.

"I see." Severus said. He tried his best to not look impressed. Because he wasn't. Impressed, that is.

"So.. I was wondering." Andrew said, sliding up closer to the desk. Severus' eyebrow raised. "I mean, I just thought that maybe we... That is, you and me. Well, we could-"

"Hey, Andrew!" Xander interrupted. Andrew's back tensed and he shot Xander an agitated look. "Sorry, was I interrupting something?"

"Not at all, Mr. Harris." Severus calmly replied, sending Andrew a strange look.

"Uh, right." Xander cleared his throat. "Andrew, it's time."

"Really?" Andrew's eyes widened. "I think I'm going to throw up."


"Right." Xander coughed out, holding his stomach. "I think that's enough for today."

"Are you okay?" Ginny asked, her eyes wide. "I didn't hurt you, did I?"

"Fine." Xander squeaked.

"Oh, Merlin. Let me help you up." Ginny reached out and took a hold of Xander's hand. She pulled, but miscalculated her strength, sending Xander flying against her. Both fell onto the floor, Xander on top of the new Slayer. "It's a good thing Andrew left, I might have thrown you into him. Sorry."

"No, no." Xander sat up. "It's fine. First practice sessions are always difficult."

"Does every Slayer beat up their Watcher?" Ginny asked mournfully.

"Actually... I think they do." Xander replied, helping Ginny stand. "Giles has the record for the most concussions."

"I don't mean to hurt you." Ginny said.

"That's the problem." Xander rested a hand on her shoulder, more to help him catch his breath than for comfort. "You're thinking too much. When you're out there battling a vampire, there isn't time to really think. You simply are."

"That was poetic." Ginny commented.

"Yeah." Xander nodded in agreement. Ginny chuckled. "Well, Mini-Red, let's get you to Defense Against the Dark Arts class. I heard you have a werewolf teaching this year. Could prove to be interesting."

"I think you just want a glimpse at Professor Lupin." Ginny said, grinning.

"You wound me. I am here to protect you from the darkness of the great beyond! To help direct you to the true path of the Slayer. Not to flirt and check out your teachers."

"Sure." Ginny nodded, her grin turning sly. "And I have the hots for Malfoy."

"What is it with that boy?" Xander asked, leading Ginny through the corridors of Hogwarts.

"He has a constant pole up his arse." Ginny replied calmly.

"Huh. I bet that hurts." Xander said. Ginny snorted in response. They stopped in front of the classroom door. "Well, here is where I leave you, my lady."

"You should come inside." Ginny told him.

"Nah." Xander waved a hand.

"Actually, I was hoping Xander would join us." Remus commented, interrupting their conversation. Xander felt himself develop a dopey smile on his face.

"Really?" Xander asked, sounding more hopeful than he intended.

"I think your experiences with various dark creatures would prove to be enlightening." Remus told him.

"Well, I don- Ow!" Xander shot a glare at Ginny, who had just pinched him. She gave him a pointed look, before entering the classroom. "Okay. I'd love to."


"Oh, great. What's he doing here?" A strangely familiar voice asked snidely. Xander raised an eyebrow at the pale blonde that was entering the classroom with a group of Slytherin students behind him. He had survived Ginny's class and was now planning on sitting through the seventh years. "He's not even a wizard. It's bad enough we have that animal teach-"

"Hey!" Xander interrupted, taking a step forward. Remus remained at his desk, watching them with his golden eyes. "Have you ever watched a werewolf change?"

"No." Draco Malfoy replied, snorting softly.

"Really? Have you ever encountered a werewolf in their wolf form?" Xander asked. Draco glared at him, and slowly shook his head no. "Well, then. I think you have a few things to learn about animals, Mr. Malfoy."

"Class, I'm sure you all remember Mr. Harris." Remus said loudly, signaling for the students to take their seats. "He's going to be joining us for this class, and many in the future if I can talk him into it."

"I'm sure you can." Xander told him, smiling. Remus looked at him a moment, the subtle hint of a blush forming on his cheeks, before returning to the class.

"As I was saying," Remus continued. "Mr. Harris has a lot of information he will be able to give you in your studies. From vampires to various forms of magic and demonology. Now, this year we will be working at discerning myth from reality. In the wizarding world, the Slayer is considered a myth. Mr. Harris, what can you tell us about this myth?"

"Well, for starters it's not a myth." Xander said. "Into every generation, blah, blah, blah. A bunch of wimpy men decided to use a girl to fight demons, instead of doing it themselves. They chained her to the earth and gave her the strength and power to defeat the darkness. Buffy was the last of this single line. And now, after some mojo by a friend, all the Slayers are activated. If you're born with the potential, you receive the power. No more one into every generation crap."

"Very good. Now, can anyone tell me the types of things Slayers battle?" Remus asked the class. Xander sat down at the desk, watching with a small smile as Remus lead the discussion.

"Vampires?" One girl in Gryffindor robes replied.

"Yes, exactly. Anything else?"

"I'd suspect they kill werewolves." Draco said snidely. Remus' back stiffened slightly at Draco's remark, sending a wave of anger through Xander. Unable to take the smug look on Draco's face, Xander stood up.

"Well, Mr. Malfoy, I think there is something that has you very confused." Xander said, trying to keep the hiss out of his voice.

"Do I?" Draco calmly asked.

"Mr. Malfoy, you will treat Mr. Harris with the same respect that you would bestow upon any professor at Hogwarts." Remus ordered.

"Yes, Professor." Draco said, saying the title with as much venom as he could muster.

"Mr. Malfoy, may I call you Draco?" Xander asked, then continued without waiting for a reply. "There are things that can't be defined as evil and good. Surely, Draco, you can understand that simple notion? You are, after all, at the age I was when I started figuring it out myself. Werewolves are not evil. They are humans who have been touched by something supernatural, that takes over every full moon. That does not make them evil. Now, it was once a custom with the Slayers to kill all things that were shaded gray or black. That's not the way things work now.

"A werewolf is not an animal. If you watch a wolf and then watch a transformed werewolf, you would understand this. They are powerful, and sometimes dangerous, beings. But that's only once a month. Every other day, they are no different than you or me. So, I think, Draco, what you should worry more about is if you can trust humans, because you are certainly around them a lot longer than you are werewolves."

"You can't trust either." Draco replied with a voice that held too much truth. Xander frowned, backing off his high horse as he saw the look on Draco's face.


"Can I ask you something?" Xander asked as he dug his toes further into the dirt. The moon was high in the sky, it's half-shaded face shining down across the lake. Xander tried to ignore the tentacle sticking from the silk surface, focusing instead on Remus’ shoed feet.


"What is Draco Malfoy's story?" Xander questioned, leaning back on his palms. Remus rested his arms on his knees, staring out at the lake with eyes that nearly glowed in the darkness. "Don't brood on me, Remus."

"His father was Voldemort's right hand man." Remus replied, his voice hoarse. "Draco was always meant to follow in his father's footsteps and become a Death Eater. The night we ambushed Voldemort's hide out, Draco was there. His father had arranged for Draco to receive the Dark Mark, a symbol of Voldemort, despite Draco being underage. We later found out that Draco had no clue that was going to happen, and that, while Draco was not a supporter of Albus, he wasn't a follower of Voldemort." Remus chuckled softly.

"He called Voldemort a dirty half-blood during interrogation." Remus said. "Anyway, during the attack, Lucius was to protect Voldemort. After dealing with a certain Death Eater by the name of Bellatrix, I went one on one with Lucius in hope that Harry and Albus would be able to defeat Voldemort."

"Then what happened?" Xander asked, scooting closer to Remus. He fought the desire to grab a hold of Remus' hand, knowing Remus didn't really need his comforting.

"Draco had been shoved into a corner. He was scared." Remus eyes were large, as though he was reliving the battle again in his mind. "I could feel his eyes on us, as we threw curse after curse against one another. Lucius... He was a mad man. He wouldn't stop no matter what. I would like to say I had no other choice for what I did, but that would be a lie. There were a hundred other curses I could of used." Remus' eyes closed a moment, before reopening. "I cast the Cruciatus Curse on Draco's father."

"What's the croo-ci-whatis?" Xander finally gave in, slipping his hand into Remus'. Remus glanced over at him.

"It's an Unforgivable. It causes severe pain to the muscles and inner organs. The result is usually inner bleeding, or insanity, depending on how long the curse is held and its intensity." Remus sighed. "Anyway... Draco watched me torture his father. It's no wonder he hates me. His father had always taught him intolerance, to hate what wasn't the same as himself. Draco just hates me a bit more than most. He uses me being a werewolf as an excuse."

"Then there is hope for him yet." Xander told him.

"What do you mean?" Remus asked, turning questioning eyes on Xander.

"When you're young, your parents always try to force their views on you." Xander shrugged. "It doesn't always work, though. Didn't work on me. It won't work on Draco. He's too stubborn to follow someone else's example, I can tell."

"How is it you're so sure?" Remus questioned, turned to look at him fully. He didn't, however, let go of Xander's hand.

"I'm just brilliant like that." Xander grinned.

"Hmm." Was Remus' reply.


"Hey, Andrew." Xander greeted, before stuffing a roll into his mouth. Andrew slid into the seat next to him, staring forward. Xander frowned and tried again, his voice muffled by the bread. "Anfrew?"

"What?" Andrew snapped, turning his big blue eyes onto him. Xander raised an eyebrow and swallowed.

"Nothing, sheesh." There was a moment's pause.

"I know." Andrew hissed. Xander looked over, his spoon filled with scrambled eggs hovering in the air. Andrew nodded, his eyes narrowed. "Oh, yes, I know. You're so happy, aren't you? You have your man. Well, we can't all have what we want, can we?"

"Andrew... What. Are. You. Going. On. About?" Xander said slowly.

"I saw you!" Andrew exclaimed, leaping to his feet. His voice sounded high pitched and emotional. Students were looking up from their breakfast. Even Severus was taking a moment to look over. Silence had officially descended the Great Hall, so when Andrew spoke next his words bounced off the high ceiling. "I saw you last night with Remus."

"What? So?" Xander blinked, not comprehending.

"You think you can just do that! Go along with your little love affair, while I'm left with nothing!" Andrew cried. Xander frowned. This almost sounded as though Xander was cheating on Andrew, which just wasn't true. Xander was suddenly thankful Remus hadn't shown up for breakfast just yet.


"It's just not fair! I want my own professor!" Andrew whined loudly. "Stupid Potions Master!"

With that said, Andrew spun on his heel and stormed out of the Great Hall. Severus stared after him, an all too common look of confusion on the poor man's face. Sighing, Xander poked at his scrambled eggs. Andrew was becoming quite the handful. If only Severus would get a clue and let the poor geek seduce him already.

"Mr. Harris." Albus said softly.

"Call me Xander." Xander automatically replied.

"Xander, yes." Albus nodded. "I was just curious... Is it simply an American thing or is Andrew very high strung?"

"Oh, us Americans have great pep." Xander said. "But Andrew simply has difficulty channeling the proper amount of energy into his day to day activity."

"Ah, I see." Albus nodded, before looking thoughtfully down the table at his Potions Master. "Severus could use some pep."

"Nice to know you support Andrew's endeavors." Xander chuckled.

"I support Remus and you, as well." Albus said, looking over the rims of his glasses. Xander blushed heavily.


"Ladies- Oh, sorry, Slayers and gentlemen! I present to you the amazing toolbox." Xander announced, bouncing into Ginny's training room. Ginny, the lone occupant, looked up from one of her demonology books. Xander grinned, setting his large toolbox on the ground, next to a broken table.

"You know I could fix that with magic, right?" Ginny said, holding her book open to her chest as she walked over to watch Xander work. "I did break it after all."

"First of all, you broke it to kill one massive vampire, which Andrew could not control after summoning." Xander replied. "Good thinking, using the table leg, by the way. Secondly, how dare you even talk about destroying the beauty that is carpentry with magic."

"Terribly sorry, Watcher of mine." Ginny snorted. Xander smiled and continued screwing the table back together. After a moments work he stepped back with a satisfied look. Ginny nodded her approval. "Lovely."

"And those idiots at the construction site said I couldn't do my job anymore." Xander let out a fake bark of laughter, before adjusting his eye patch. He turned to Ginny, tilting his head in an attempt at reading the title of her book. "Enjoying your studies?"

"It's very fascinating, I must say." Ginny replied. "It was in Ancient Greek, but after a quick translation spell I could read it with no problem. Though, some of the pictures." Ginny looked down into the book's depths. "So strange. Look at that horn..." Xander grinned, waiting for her reaction. "Oh... I see. Not a horn."

"Well, I'll leave you to your... horns." Xander told her. Ginny shot him a dark look, before twisting the book to get a better look at the picture.

"Go play with Professor Lupin." Ginny ordered.

"Well, not when you make it sound so naughty." Xander frowned. Ginny merely grinned in reply. "Besides, I have things to do. Like torture my Slayer with questions about homework and boys."

"Oh, great. Another letter to mum, then?" Ginny groaned dramatically. "Please don't tell her about my detention. I didn't mean to turn Malfoy's hair pink. It just kind of... happened."

"I'm sure it did. Just like the deliberate words just kind of popped out of your mouth, hmm?" Xander smirked.

"If you tell her, then I'll tell her about you having Andrew summon a vampire twice my size." Ginny countered.

"Ooohhh, scary." Xander grinned, before grimacing. "Come to think of it... Molly Weasley, breathing down my back about hurting her baby girl? Maybe I'll focus on your excellent grades."

"Might be a good idea."

"By the way, I was thinking of talking to Albus about a little field trip." Xander commented. "You can't simply get training with Andrew summoning vampires and the soft demon or two. So, I was thinking, Halloween weekend? A nice trip to the nearest muggle city? Making a cemetery stop or two? Hmm?"

"Really?" Ginny asked, looking skeptical. Xander nodded and the redhead broke into an excited grin. "Oh, wow! This is great!"

"I know. I know." Xander sighed. "I am amazing."

"Whatever, Watcher-boy."
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