Large PrintHandheldAudioRating
using
 paypal
Twisting The Hellmouth Crossing Over Awards - Results
Is your email address still valid?

Ten Things that Never

StoryReviewsStatisticsRelated StoriesTracking
Ficlet(s)

Summary: Yet another 'ten things' and yet again with Xander. I chose all the fandoms I liked, so I hope you like them too!

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Multiple Crossings > Xander-Centered > Ficlet CollectionsJadeSamaFR1312,718062,55918 Mar 0518 Mar 05Yes
Ten Things That Never Happened to Xander: By JadeSama

In Order of Appearance:

Star Wars (movie)

The Sentinel (tv)

Dirk Pitt (books)

Bourne (books)

X-Men (movie)

Highlander (tv)

Star Trek (tv)

Sword of Truth (books)

Friends (tv)

JAG (tv)

**

AN: The first one is Star Wars, I’ve read Xander as a lot of people out of this universe, but never the main character, so here he is!

Disclaimer: George Lucas owns the last of the Skywalker line, Joss Weaton and Mutant Enemy own the One-Who-Sees and I just watch it all happen. I will give them back in just as good of condition as I found them.

Rating: G - light swearing.

Pairing: none.

**

The soldier costume wasn’t what he really wanted, he wanted Star Wars.

Luke Skywalker.

Black leather pants, black long sleeve shirt, black combat boos and a black cloak. His old toy lightsaber at his belt. ‘Return of the Jedi’ Luke Skywalker.

__

“Xander?”

“Ma’am? Where am I?” Luke Skywalker turned to look at the redhead ghost. A master jedi? No, she didn’t feel force-sensitive.

“Xander, we’re in Sunnydale.”

“I’m Luke Skywalker ma’am, not this Xander you continue to call me.” She drifted closer and gasped.

“Oh my god, I gotta talk to Giles.” And she vanished

What a strange woman.

__

Xander sat alone in his bed the next morning, struggling with his memories. His real memories. He struggled with what had been left behind by Luke Skywalker. He could feel the force, the life force of everything, the goodness and evilness of everything.

Holding out his hand he called his Lord of the Rings trilogy book to himself. The force picked the book up and floated it to him.

“Damn, That is cool.” Now he had powers! Like Buffy. Only he had to be careful not to turn bad, Buffy would kill him now it that happened to him.

**

AN: This second one is from the Sentinel which aired only in the States I think... I love the Sentinel.

Disclaimer: Pet Fly owns the Guide and his Sentinel while Joss Weaton and Mutant Enemy own the One-Who-Sees . I will give them back in just as good of condition as I found them.

Rating: PG for homosexual situations.

Pairing: Jim/Blair

**

Xander could feel another one living here and knew that he had to be a beta for this. A short long haired man answered the door and looked him up and down.

“Who are you?”

“Sentinel Xander Harris. I could feel a guide/sentinel pair here and I had to investigate. It’s not often a Sentinel finds a guide in this day and age.”

“Well Mr Harris, we’ve been here for years. Why find us now?” Short-stuff put a hand on his hip and leaned against the doorframe.

“I was on a Hellmouth, getting off it opened my senses wider. Besides, you just completed the bond.” Xander smile, “I’ve never met a female sentinel before either. I expected a male.”

A taller man appeared behind Short-stuff, “Sentinel Harris, I am Sentinel James Ellison.”

Xander frowned the his eyes widened in understanding, “I’m sorry. I didn’t realize that like normal humans, sentinel’s could be gay too. I’m sorry, really.”

Ellison nodded, “I understand. Why don’t you come it?”

“I’d love to. So what do you do for a living?”

“I’m a cop, Blair is an Anthropology student.”

“Cool, I hunt demons. You know, protect the tribe kinda thing.”

**

AN: Third one! Dirk Pitt. I just had to do a real-father one and Dirk told me to use him.

Disclaimer: Clive Cussler made and owns Dirk Pitt and all things associated. Joss Weaton and Mutant Enemy own the One-Who-Sees and I just watch it all happen. I will give them back in just as good of condition as I found them.

Rating: G

Pairing: None

**

“So... my real father?” Xander looked at the older man who stood on his door step.

“I... travel a lot. I’m the deputy director of NUMA.”

“National Underwater and Marine Agency. Interesting.” Xander spread his arms to let the man into the apartment, “Don’t be to disappointed with the mess, it’s usually worse.”

“You... don’t have questions? Doubts?” Dirk Pitt looked around the apartment, which was riddled with beer and other kinds of alcoholic beverage bottles.

“Hey, this had to be one of the best things that ever happened to me, Mr Pitt; finding out that I’m not really related to that bastard who married my mother.”

“Why all the alcohol?” He honestly wanted to know. Why was his son drinking so much? Perhaps it had something to do with all the scars he’s seen on the chest and back of the shirtless twenty-two year old.

“I just left my girl-friend at the alter, why the hell do you thing?”

Xander had a girl-friend? “Why would you do that?”

“Because I didn’t want to turn out like my parents.” Xander paused, “But I guess I don’t need to worry about that anymore, huh Mr Pitt.?”

“Please, call me Dirk.”

**

AN: I’ve been watching all these Bourne movies and I just read the books yet again and I just had to put the Initiative in with Treadstone. BtVS post season seven, I don’t know where in the Bourne series it would be. Sometime after the Carlos mess in the books.

Disclaimer: Robert Ludlum made and owns Jason Bourne/David Webb, Joss Weaton and Mutant Enemy own the One-Who-Sees and I just watch it all happen. I will give them back in just as good of condition as I found them.

Rating: G

Pairing: None

**

Jason looked up at the group of young men talking in the corner. They were different. They were fighters. The young man with one eye had mentioned Treadstone.

“So the same guys who did the Initiative did Treadstone?”

“Yah, Apparently humans weren’t enough to experiment on, they had to involve demons too.”

“Thanks for the info Riley, I appreciate it.”

“Well, if you ever what help taking the bastards down, don’t hesitate to call.”

“Will do Ri, thanks again.”

When the one eyed man left the seedy bad, Jason followed. Very few people knew about Treadstone and he wanted to know everyone who knew.

“Why are you following me?” The question came from the man he was following and Jason found himself face to face with the man.

No one could do that; no one got the better of Jason Bourne.

“I wanted to know what you know about Treadstone.”

“Well, Mr Webb, follow away then. I’m bring the bastards down for doing that to men like you.”

“How did you...”

“I see things Mr Webb. Or do you go by Bourne?” He cocked his head to one side, “I’m Xander Harris, care to join me?”

“I would love to.”

**

AN: Marvel. Had to, loved the X-Men movies. This is right before the second movie when Jean, Scott and Storm have the kids at the museum.

Disclaimer: Marvel owns all things X-Men related. Joss Weaton and Mutant Enemy own the One-Who-Sees and I just watch it all happen. I will give them back in just as good of condition as I found them.

Rating: G

Pairing: None

**

“Precog.”

“Excuse me? Did I give you permission to scan or read me?” The young man looked at Jean Grey with no emotion in his eyes... eye.

She opened her hands in apology, “I’m sorry.”

“No you’re not. And you’re wrong anyway; I just see people. I don’t read futures, only people.” The museum seemed to fade away and Jean was suddenly looking through - Xander’s - eye. She saw people for their true self, for who they really were. She saw her students and her boyfriend. What she saw about him surprised her.

“Gay?”

“Repressed. To me, you are his Willow; closer then family. He thinks he’s strange enough, he doesn’t want t add another label.”

“I’m sorry, I’ll keep to myself, more control.”

“You don’t need more control, you need to embrace your strength. Don’t fear it. If you let yourself go, you won’t be overwhelmed. Remember my advice Phoenix, you’ll need it.” And he walked away. Jean watched, understanding more about why the other mutants didn’t come out. That man could see the anger, hate and fear of the others.

**

AN: Highlander. I love that show, and I love Methos. I also wanted to give Xander and out so he would never be stuck in Sunnydale or in the others’ shadows.

Disclaimer: Warner Brothers and Gaumont TV own Methos and the Immortals, Joss Weaton and Mutant Enemy own the One-Who-Sees and I just watch it all happen. I will give them back in just as good of condition as I found them.

Rating: G

Pairing: None

**

“Some one who actually recognizes the weirder shit in life.” Methos stepped out from behind the tress when the young man had finished off the vampire.

“Hey, we can’t all live in denial. It’ll get you dead.” The boy must have been around twelve or thirteen, Methos wondered what he was doing, being out so late.

The boy must have seen it in his eyes and smiled, “It’s safer to be out killing vamps then back at the house where Dad’s always drunk and Mom’s always on something.”

Something tugged Methos’ heart and he sat down on one of the tombstones, “What’s your name?”

“Xander.” No it wasn’t. Methos gave him a look and he sighed, “Alexei.”

“I’m Methos. Do you know how old I am Xander?”

“Twenty-eight to Thirty-three physically. Guessing... over three thousand years old realistically.”

“Five thousand, actually.”

“Interesting. Pretty tall, aren’t you?” Methos nodded and Xander raised an eyebrow, “Why are you here? On the Hellmouth?”

“I wanted to see if it lived up to expectations.”

“Has it?”

“I think, maybe it has.” Methos reached in his pocket and pulled out a card, “I just moved into town. If you ever want to escape, call.”

**

AN: Star Trek. I love Kirk, he’s my favourite ST character. And the Captain’s Bar? Just had too!

Disclaimer: ST is owned by Gene Roddenberry and Paramount Pictures. Joss Weaton and Mutant Enemy own the One-Who-Sees and I just watch it all happen. I will give them back in just as good of condition as I found them.

Rating: PG

Pairing: None, slight Kirk/Xander

**

The Captain’s Bar seemed like a good place to relax, so the young, but tired, man stepped inside. He looked around in surprise as he saw that less then half of the clientele were human. With one last look he shrugged and went to the bar, “Cape Codder on the rocks, please.” The... being nodded and turned to mix the drink.

“New?” The dark voice and hazel eyes caught Xander’s attention and he studied the an who was wearing black slacks and a gold shirt.

“Yah.”

“Just promoted?”

“Um, no. Not military.” Xander smiled, “Just a civilian.”

“Oh. But you command?”

“Well, I guess you could say that.” Xander nodded his thanks to the bartender and took a sip of his drink.

“What year are you from?”

“2005, Earth.”

“2297. I wander, why aren’t you surprised at the clientele?” Hazel-Eyes didn’t let his gaze waiver.

“Extenuating circumstances. What do you do?”

“Captain James Kirk of the StarShip Enterprise.”

“Xander Harris, Guerilla Leader against the invasion of demons.”

“Harris?” The bartender slid over the leaned over to get into Xander’s face, “You been fighting for ten years?”

“Only because no one else would. So, Starship?” Xander turned to Hazel-Eyes.

**

AN: I don’t know how this came about, but... oh well, enjoy.

Disclaimer: Terry Goodkind wrote the ‘Sword of Truth’ series. Joss Weaton and Mutant Enemy own the One-Who-Sees and I just watch it all happen. I will give them back in just as good of condition as I found them.

Rating: G

Pairing: None.

**

Xander studied the sword that Buffy had found on a raid. Even for her it was heavy. More burden heavy then weight heavy, but she didn’t want to wield it.

“What does it say?” The blade held ancient runes along it that not even Giles or Dawn recognized. Willow was looking with magic at the sword when Xander spoke.

“Sword of Truth.” The group looking at him and he moved forward as though in a trance. “The runes say ‘Sword of Truth’. This sword was for the Bearer of Truth and his or her quest.”

He knew this blade, could feel the power that it held and the truth it would uncover. The One-Who-Saw saw truth and the sword called to it’s brother.

Drawing the sword off the table Xander reached far down into himself and brought his essence to the surface, letting it touch the aura of the sword, introducing himself. The silver blade glowed gold and accepted it’s brother and wielder.

“Xander?”

“It was seeking a true wielder, a seeker of truth. One-Who-Saw.” Buffy recognized the line that the psycho ex-priest had called Xander before clawing out his left eye.

“If it was seeking for a wielder,” Buffy smiled at her brother in chosen destiny, “I believe it’s found that in you my friend.”

**

AN: This is just a strange one. But I kept asking people what their favourite TV show was and almost all of them said ‘Friends’, so... here you go! By the way, I don’t know when you would want to place this in the ‘Friends’ world, so it’s basically pick your favourite season.

Disclaimer: I don’t know who, but someone else owns Friends. Joss Weaton and Mutant Enemy own the One-Who-Sees and I just watch it all happen. I will give them back in just as good of condition as I found them.

Rating: G

Pairing: None

**

Xander looked up at the girls, “You usually sit here?” he didn’t really now why he was in New York, but he had something to do and it took him here.

“Yeah, do you mind?”

“Not at all, sit away.”

The blonde smiled and sat beside him, holding out her hand, “Hi, I’m Phoebe.”

“Nice name, I’m Xander.” The other two women stared at them. If they thought he would move for them, they had another thing coming.

“I’m Rachel.” The shorter blondish seemed off-put about something and sat in the chair by the bar, “That’s Monica. So, new? You sound like you come from California.”

Monica sat down in the other chair and Xander gave them both big smiles, “Yah, Sunnydale, California. About two hours drive from LA.”

Phoebe’s eyes widened and she almost gasped, “La Boca del Inferno?”

“You know of the Hellmouth Phebs?” Xander nodded, “Yah, fought the First.”

“And won!” She moved closer and leaned in to whisper in his ear, “I’m a natural witch. I heard that the Dark Witch was born and raised in Sunnydale.”

“Yah, my best-friend: Willow.”

“Can I meet her?”

**

AN: I had a thought at one time of what happened after the Initiative left SD, CA. I came up with this. I also changed canon a bit and Xander was captured by the Initiative after the soldiers saw him dust a few vamps on his own.

Disclaimer: I’ve only seen JAG once or twice on the History Channel, so I don’t know who owns it. Too lazy to find out via internet. Joss Weaton and Mutant Enemy own the One-Who-Sees and I just watch it all happen. I will give them back in just as good of condition as I found them.

Rating: G

Pairing: None

**

He was bored and couldn’t think of anything to do, so he just sat and watched people come and go in the coffee shop. He was intrigued by an officer who stepped into the dope with a woman by his side.

“Oh come on Rabb, nothing strange is going on. Just because you’re defending Captain Graham Miller in a case of murder and his whole life is blacked out. The Initiative is just a code word for a mission.”

“An eighteen month mission? Hell, his whole file refers to that assignment. I want to know what it was about.”

“You don’t want to know about the assignment Commander, it’ll give you nightmares and scare and scar you for life.” The two officers turned and looked at Xander who’s head was down.

“Who are you?”

“One of the civilians that was involved. Not by choice.”

They sat and Rabb frowned when Xander lifted his head and showed them his single eye, “What do you know about the project?”

“Everything. If you want information tell Graham that he has my permission to tell you.”

“And who, exactly, are you?”

“I’m number 328. Tell Graham that I forgive them everything.”

**

Finis

The End

You have reached the end of "Ten Things that Never". This story is complete.

StoryReviewsStatisticsRelated StoriesTracking