Spoilers: Post Chosen, anytime in NCIS, Pits
Disclaimer: I own neither Buffy nor NCIS, nor do I know anyone who does. Buffy belongs to Joss and NCIS to CBS. No copyright infringement intended. No money made.
AN: WhiteWolf and Dorothy mentioned Buffy getting her whip back. The naughty muse jumped on the idea, which surprised me. I haven’t heard from my naughty muse in just forever.
The Rating got bumped up ‘cause of Faith. She does that.
Which would not surprise anyone who knew Andrew, he was the squirmy type.
But Andrew had a reason; he was tied up and gagged.
Again, nothing that would surprise anyone who knew Andrew.
Friends had tied up Andrew.
Still, this was not something that would surprise anyone who knew Andrew. Most of the people Andrew had met eventually threatened, or carried out the threat, to tie and gag him.
So being tied, gagged in thrown in a car truck was not a new experience for Andrew. He really should have seen this coming, Buffy had not been pleased that Faith had found out about their countryside excursion with the NCIS officers where Andrew had saved Buffy.
But that was so not his fault!
He had stood firm against the wiles of the Dark Slayer’s curiosity –for weeks! Andrew thought that that should count for something. Okay, so it was technically only eleven days, but that rounded up to two weeks. Andrew had tried hard to avoid Faith, and he had been mostly successful. He had thought that the Slayer had become distracted from her goal of finding out what happened to Buffy’s leather whip, when she had ignored him for two days.
Then on that Friday night a knock sounded on his suite door, he loved that he had a suite to himself even if the main reason was that no one wanted to bunk with him. He had been right at a good part of the comic book he had been reading, where Spiderman and Wolverine were working together, one of his all time favorites. (See geeks and the super strong can get along –sorta.) He had contemplated yelling ‘Come in,’ but he was Sunnydale born and bred. He had reluctantly put down the comic book to answer the door.
Andrew shook his hands fruitlessly, he couldn’t rid himself of the rope that held him captive. Buffy was way too good at tying people up. He would be stuck here until Buffy forgave him, or until Giles told her to release him.
Oh yeah, what had he been thinking about?
Oh yeah, how could he forget?
The knock on his suite door. It had been Faith. She needed to take a shower and since everyone else shared suites, there was somebody using all the other showers. It was a Friday night and most of the girls were going out. So she had demanded, not too nicely for Andrew to get suspicious, for the use of Andrew’s (suite) shower. It had been the first time that a girl had asked to use his shower. Normally they would steal Xander’s or Giles’ shower and force them to take a shower in his suite.
Andrew should have known better, but he had blithely let Faith into his suite and into his bathroom. He had returned to his comic book, unaware of the plots the Dark Slayer was plotting. When the door to his (suite) bathroom had opened and steam had billowed out, Andrew had not been surprised. When Faith had stepped out of the bathroom in nothing more than a towel, well, that was a totally different scenario.
The towel wasn’t all that big either. The top of it barely covered her . . . you-know-whats . . . and the bottom of it barely covered her . . . you-know-what. She had the towel wrapped around her and it was staying up, by itself, by some miracle technique that most girls instinctively knew how to do. Andrew couldn’t do it, that was for sure. He always kept a firm hand on his towel or it would slide off and embarrass him.
That thought/ memory, of course, hadn’t helped Andrew’s situation much. He had forgotten to breathe, let alone any promises that he had made to Buffy.
So see! It totally hadn’t been his fault.
He still didn’t know what questions Faith had asked in that moment. Andrew just hoped fervently that he hadn’t embarrassed himself too much.
Hey, he could hope!
Andrew shifted his head on the weapon’s bag, thankful that Willow had made them all tear-proof. That way he couldn’t accidentally behead himself while in the truck of a car all tied up. But, now that he thought about it, that sword that he was leaning against should be able to help him take off the gag.
So he was back to squirming around in the car truck. At least this time had a purpose, he eventually got the gag off. Now he could breathe better.
And here Andrew was, tied up in the trunk of a car as Buffy and Faith broke into the NCIS agent’s apartment. When he had bargained to be a part of Buffy’s missions for his silence in the NCIS fiasco, this was not what he had in mind. They hadn’t even taken the magical incense with them into the apartment. Once lit, the smelly stuff would discourage anyone from thinking about anything supernatural, so long as they weren’t looking at the said supernatural when it was lit. It worked really well on Slayers and witches. It did not work on normal people like he and Xander. But Faith thought that the magical incense was cheating, and so did Buffy up to a point.
Oh, how did he manage to get himself into these predicaments? It was hot in this trunk.
Once Faith had stopped laughing at the idea of Andrew saving Buffy, she had thought that Buffy should retrieve her whip. Faith’s affirmation had been just the thing to urge Buffy into action. So the two oldest Slayers had ordered Andrew to book them a flight to the DC area. Andrew had booked three tickets, one for himself. He had threatened to tell everyone that he had saved the Oldest Slayer if they didn’t let him come along. After all, he had spent time with Agent DiNozzo. He would be the best person to ask for the whip. He was the one who had done all the research on the NCIS agents. He was the one who knew where they lived. The Slayers had agreed to his reasoning.
What Andrew hadn’t realized was that Buffy and Faith had no intention of politely asking the NCIS agent for the leather whip. They had planned to steal . . . reacquire . . . the whip from Agent DiNozzo. He should have known. He should have run off in the other direction when the three of them had arrived at DiNozzo’s condo. Not that he would have outrun a Slayer, but he would have retained more pride than just standing there as Faith gagged him and Buffy hog-tied him.
Andrew shifted again. The trunk of this model of car really wasn’t comfortable. He had been in at least two other models that offered more room. Andrew heard something scraping the trunk lock and he stilled. Had Buffy and Faith found the whip already? Were they going to let him out for the journey back to the airport?
Andrew didn’t think so. Buffy was still mad that he spilled to Faith and Faith thought it was funny to have a guy tied up in the trunk. Dread grew in Andrew’s gut. It was taking someone way too long to unlock the trunk, as if the key didn’t work or . . . someone was picking the lock.
The trunk popped open and moonlight spilled in. Andrew had to blink as his eyes adjusted. The person standing there blinked just as much.
“Andrew?” Tony asked.
For once, Andrew wished that he was still gagged. He would rather not talk to this particular NCIS agent. “Uh, hi?” He waved his hands, drawing attention to the rope that had him hog-tied.
“What on earth are you doing in there?”
Andrew could tell that the other man was laughing at him. He pouted. “Taking a nap,” he sniped.
Tony laughed. “I can see that. Who put you in there?”
“I put myself in here,” Andrew lied.
Tony laughed harder. “No really, why are you in there?”
Andrew shrugged. “’Cause of a girl.”
“It’s always ‘cause of girl.” But Tony reached over to try to untie Andrew.
Suddenly Tony brightened. “Is it because of your friend, Buffy?”
Tony looked around hopefully, Andrew’s bonds forgotten.
“Hey!” Andrew had Tony’s attention again. Maybe if he kept it for a while, Buffy might forgive him sooner than later. He tried to look his most pitiful. “Please, help me?”
Tony had to think about it, but eventually reached back into the trunk.
“Thank-you.” A smooth movement caught Andrew’s eye and he dearly hoped that it wasn’t a vampire or some other nasty out for a mid-night snack. He . . . and Tony would be so screwed. But if it was a Slayer . . . and he squealed, he would end up in Buffy’s doghouse forever.
Andrew heard the crack of something hitting the back of Tony’s head. Tony fell like a redwood tree. Andrew shrunched down, closed his eyes and started babbling. “You don’t want to eat me, you don’t want to eat me. The Slayers are here. The True Slayers are here, the Light and the Dark One. You really, really, really, really don’t want to eat me.”
A chuckle. “You’re right. We really, really don’t want to eat you.”
Andrew opened one eye a little. Buffy was standing there. Faith was holding an unconscious Agent DiNozzo.
“But while we’re talking about scrumptious,” the Dark Slayer leered at her burden. “This one definitely is.”
Buffy padded DiNozzo’s pockets and soon found his keys. “We have a plane to catch. Remember? We’ll dump him in his apartment and go.”
“Geek can change my flight.”
“Not in here,” Andrew piped up.
Buffy shrugged, tossed her retrieved whip in with Andrew and closed the trunk. Andrew was alone in the dark again. He sighed and waited. It was going to be a long night.