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Goodbye Bill

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This story is No. 2 in the series "Wishing with Anya". You may wish to read the series introduction and the preceeding stories first.

Summary: Seems Sookie has become a little too used to minds she can't read. Wishing puts her in a tight spot.

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Literature > Southern Vampire Mysteries
Literature > Childrens/Teen > Alice in Wonderland
(Current Donor)ShieldageFR722,005034,52820 Jun 0627 Oct 13Yes

There's Plenty of Room

BtVS by Whedon and Mutant Enemy. Southern Vampire Mysteries by Charlaine Harris. Alice's Adventures in Wonderland by Lewis Carroll.

Written for BlameyFomorrii's Challenge “When Anya met Bill”. With my expanding the story I've decided to tie this into the (far?) future of 'Complicating the Journey' :)



Anya stood in the middle of a black, featureless void. In her hand was a Barnes and Nobles shopping receipt. Following her 'success' at bringing chaos to Middle Earth, she'd been given the task of arranging a series of crossover elements. Buying a set of books had seemed the most straightforward way to go about preparing for it.

Reviewing her list, she decided on a Southern Vampire Mystery, because scorned women were close to her heart and the Charlaine Harris novels were full of troubles. Knowing where she was headed, she made sure that her amulet was projecting a short-range anti-psychic field so she could observe stealthily, although she'd have to turn it off for actual conversation. Pulling two books from a dimensional pocket she stacked them on top of each other and stepped into the space between.

Anya appeared in the center of the Bon Temps bar that served as one of the focal points for the life of Sookie Stackhouse, the blonde mind-reading heroine that she could see way down a hallway, her back fortunately facing the new arrival.

Anya quickly stepped to the side. “Well, that would have blown my cover completely. I'm glad it's early enough that the place is empty. Now, how do I go about this?”

Her question was answered by a second Sookie appearing where Anya had been standing a few seconds before.

“Anya?” Sookie looked at her, than down the hallway. “Wait, is that me, way down there?” She took a few steps closer, than froze. “Wow, I can actually, almost, hear myself. What is going-”

Anya quickly grabbed her by the arm and pulled her out of the line of sight from the staff area as the original Sookie perked up as if she'd caught the scent of something and began to turn around.

“That,” Anya said as she maneuvered her companion out of the bar. “Is because you were near the edge of my amulet's range. If you don't want to cause a temporal paradox, you're going to have to do what I say. First thing, could you please tell me what you wished for?”

After some careful consideration, Anya connected Sookie's wish to a book on her list and crossed it off.


As they stood in the center of Bill's living room, the vampire asleep for the day, Anya handed Sookie a bottle marked 'Drink Me'. “All you have to do to return to your normal flow of time is drink this.”

It took some coaxing but the blonde waitress eventually downed the bottle.

“Well, that, and waving this fan,” Anya said, tossing a white fan into a corner of the room. “I like his name, by the way. Reminds me of a certain pack pony I spent time cuddling recently. This reality seems to be enhancing my control over time, so I'm just going to push you ahead a few hours to give you enough time to make that wish.”

Anya put her hands on Sookie's shoulders and pushed her forward a step.


“Seriously?” Sookie looked around, seeing that she was alone in the room. It was night and the walls were slowly shrinking. After a couple blinks, she realized that she was growing very, very quickly and sat down to give herself more room.

Some of the furniture splintered as it was pressed between her sudden bulk and the walls. She felt the faint buzz of a vampire close by, but thoughts on that were deflected by worry until her expansion slowed and finally stopped.

“Great,” she said, in a slightly booming mutter. “I admit to wanting some vengeance on Bill, but I didn't expect it to be this uncomfortable. Note to self, when dealing with fairies, if you wind up being given something that looks like it's out of Alice in Wonderland, it probably is. Now, where did that fan go?”

After spending a little while grinding her head against the ceiling she spotted the fan in the corner. Leaning to grab it, she managed to get an oversized shoe stuck in the fireplace. Grimacing, she gave her foot a sharp jerk, freeing it and sending something flying back up the chimney, unseen.

Holding the tiny fan between two fingertips she began idly waving it as she talked to herself. “Wait, was that... Yep, the name of the Lizard the White Rabbit sent down the chimney after Alice was definitely Bill. She sent him flying, all 'There goes Bill.' Guess I sent mine flying too...”

Standing up, once she had enough room to do so, Sookie paced a bit until she judged she was about her normal height and decided to stop waving the fan until she could figure out how to measure herself exactly. To her horror, the fan seemed to be stuck to her hand.

With the rate of her shrinking increasing rapidly, Sookie was two feet tall before both she and the fan vanished with a 'pop'.
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