Title: Fanboys are Everywhere. Even…(3/?)
Author: Ed Scott
Disclaimer: All characters belong to their rightful owners... none of
who are me.
Summary: YARTF. As Xander was leaving his new job in Oxnard, he meets some people from out of town who have the same interests as he does.
Warning: Crossovers (Of course. All Sci Fi)
Feedback, It's the coin of the realm.
Xander followed John Stewart to the turbo lift and John only said one word.
Xander took this to mean that an entire deck of the Enterprise was nothing but weapons. Xander was about to think about what kind of weapons were on the ship, but the turbo lift stopped and opened it’s doors. As Xander and John left the turbo lift, the lights came on. What Xander saw almost made him faint. Xander was too shocked to move.
He was in Geek Heaven. There were rows of every type of phaser used on Star Trek, movies and TV, to the laser pistol favored by Han Solo. When Xander looked at the laser rifles, there was something attached to the top of one type of rifle that wasn’t standard issue. And the idea of it was not lost on Xander. These intergalactic fanboys put a laser sight on the rifles the Stormtroopers used. Xander pointed and John almost cracked a smile.
After bypassing all the guns from the Flash Gordon movies and serials, Xander was shown the melee weapons. Of which there were only one type that Xander cared about. Lightsabers. Rows and rows of them. Xander always dreamed about what a Lightsaber would do to a vampire. Having seen Obi Wan do it all the time in Mos Eisley Cantina, he knew the vampires and demons wouldn’t stand a payer against one lightsaber, let alone three or four.
“How many Lightsabers can I have?”
All of the Super Friends that are on the Enterprise knew which weapon Xander would ask for first. It was a given that everyone wanted a Lightsaber.
“How many do you need?”
“Five. Two of Luke’s from his father, one of Obi Wan’s, one of Vader’s and one of the ones Luke made to become a Jedi. Plus training blades and remotes. For the guns, Five Imperial rifles, with sufficient batteries, five classic Star Trek phasers and five Next Generation phasers.”
John immediately started getting the equipment Xander asked for. After all the weapons were in their respective cases, John Stewart closed them and handed them to Xander.
“Here you go. And remember. Shop smart. Shop S Mart.”
Xander was starting to really like these aliens. They were fans of the great Bruce Campbell. And the Might Chin has never been bad in anything he’s done.
“Xander, drop these off on the bridge and Wally will meet you in the hanger. I know that the vehicles that we made won’t help you fight vampires, but there is a race of beings called the Goa’uld. They want slaves and universal domination. However, our home world is so far away, they’d have no way of reaching us before they’d run out of supplies. But there’s no need to worry about that now. Go see what we have. You won’t be disappointed. Just tell the elevator to take you to the hanger.”
Xander shook John’s hand before he grabbed the cases. After dropping them off on the bridge, Xander headed for the hanger. When the door opened, Xander noticed that the hanger was five floors high and was the entire length and width of the ship Wally was standing there waiting. He wasn’t patiently waiting, because Wally West was not a patient man.
“So, did you get a Lightsaber?”
“Of course. I’ve always wanted one. Now I have one. So, John tells me you have some vehicles you wanted to show me?”
“Oh yeah. But you have to close your eyes first.”
“I don’t want to spoil the surprise.”
Xander did as he was asked. After a few seconds, Wally yelled, “Lights!” Then Xander slowly opened his eyes. What Xander saw shocked him and knew George Lucas would be calling his lawyers for copyright infringement.
He saw X-Wings, Y-Wings, land speeders, snow speeders, a Millennium Falcon, an AT-AT and an AT-ST. There were also some runabouts, a couple of Imperial shuttles and fighters from Battlestar Galactica on a rail system to load them onto a launching bay. After all these vehicles, there was a blast door that had Door #2 painted on it. Xander’s curiosity was peaked.
“OK, Wally. What’s behind Door #2?” Xander had asked while failing not to laugh. Wally was laughing as he walked over to a console and entered a combination to open the door. The door opened and Xander walked through it. What Xander saw, only one thing came to mind.
“Oh, hell no. You have GOT to be kidding me.”
Xander looked up and saw five robot lions.