What is It?
WHAT IS THAT THING?
AUTHOR’S NOTE: Awhile back, for lack of anything better to do, I watched a Disney movie on TV. The idea for this story occurred to me shortly thereafter. This may not be the weirdest crossover ever, but it’s the strangest one I’ve written.
DISCLAIMER: I don’t own any of the Stargate characters or the Disney character that makes an appearance here. No profit is earned.
“What is it?”
“We’re not sure, sir.”
“Where was it found, again?”
“Hawaii. It was living on one of the smaller islands as a family pet.”
“No idea what it is? Where it came from? Teal’c?”
“I am sorry General Landry. I have never seen such a creature before.”
Landry sighed as he looked over his flagship team, minus one. “Where is colonel Mitchell?”
“Infirmary, sir,” Carter answered. “He was bitten.”
“By that thing?”
“No sir, by the little girl it was living with.”
Deciding not to comment on that, he turned back to the monitor. Displayed on the screen, was the isolation room in which the creature was being kept. It had easily broken out of its animal carrier and was wandering the room on all fours, sniffing randomly at various points along the floor and walls. Its large ears never ceased their motion. “What do we know about it?” he finally asked.
“We haven’t had time to run any lab tests yet, sir,” colonel Carter responded. “At this point, all we have is our own observations.”
“And?” he prompted.
“Well,” Daniel Jackson thought for a moment. “It’s not a dog.”
“What?” Landry asked, slightly thrown by the comment.
“The family it was living with, two sisters, tried to convince us it was a dog.”
“Are they both blind?” he asked incredulously. It looked more like a koala to him, an angry, mutated koala.
“No sir. They’re being questioned now. It’s safe to say they know what it is and where it came from, but they’re not talking.”
“It’s, um, strong, very strong actually,” Carter ventured.
“Quick as well,” Teal’c offered, “and quite cunning.”
“Too soon to say, sir,” Carter answered. “I did hear it speak, but nothing more complicated than a parrot might have managed. It may just be a very clever animal.”
“So,” Landry summed up. “It’s fast, strong, clever, and… blue.”
“Add gross to the list,” Jackson commented as he watched the thing lick its nose.
On the screen, the creature had risen to its hind legs and turned its large ears in the direction of the observation room. The rest of the head followed at Daniel Jackson’s comment. It grinned up at the camera and called out in a grating, high-pitched voice, “don’t forget cute and fluffy!”