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World Without I: Parts 1-30

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Review of chapter "Part Twenty-nine & Thirty" from MarcusSLazarus
Hoo boy...

Now THIS is problematic.

Willow's the sole hope for a reality where things went COMPLETELY to pot because Buffy stayed dead, an army of demons might be coming to the Stargate reality- which is WOEFULLY ill-prepared to deal with them- and to top it all off, she and the SGC are sometimes THIS close to trying to kill each other.

To say the situation is bleak is a MAJOR understatement...

Still, I have to admire your presentation of Willow; I might not entirely AGREE with her getting angry about Teal'c and Sam setting off her wards- how could anyone have known that was going to happen-, but I can at least get her reasoning behind it (Particularly since she's under a significant amount of stress- to say the least- due to events in her reality).

All in all, I just have one slight problem; you didn't explore her new relationship with Daniel in enough depth.

They make a good couple, don't get me wrong, but I still wish you'd looked more at the conversation they had over dinner that led to them actually BEGINNING their 'relationship'; given the age gap and the fact that Willow's last serious relationship was with a WOMAN, I'd think they'd need a bit more time to get to THAT stage...

Still, that aside, an intriguing storyline so far; keep up the good work!

(The bit with Faith becoming a Tok'ra alone should REALLY make things interesting now...)
Review By [MarcusSLazarus] • Date [7 Jan 09] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Part Twenty-nine & Thirty" from deathgeonous
Hmm, intersting. I'll read the sequals in a bit.
Review By [deathgeonous] • Date [16 Feb 08] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "World Without" from Metallix
This is a enjoyable story but while it was interesting to read I still found one major fault with it and that is the fact that you kept on stating how the military would be unable to do anything against the demons without Willows help.

Now I can understand how you could fall into that trap as it is a very common misconception in the buffyverse but the fact is guns work against all demons that could be killed outside of mystical means which means anything that would be vulnerable to a sword or ax could be killed by guns.

If the military wanted to kill Vampires they would use HE rounds and Flamethrowers combined with infrared goggles to determine weather someone is a vampire or not.

If they wanted to kill a big hulking demon the size of a car they would use RPGs and tank-buster rockets.

And if they wanted to kill off an army of demons advancing on a military base they would use aircraft able to blow them up from a distance.

The only reason the initiative didn't use such things was because they were a covert assignment and had to keep under the radar of the general populace this would not be the case in an all out war.
Review By [Metallix] • Date [3 Feb 08] • Rating [7 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Part Twenty-nine & Thirty" from purrfus
Found World III and decided I should read the first parts first. I've just finished this and am looking forward to the next part.
Review By [purrfus] • Date [3 Sep 07] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Part Fifteen and Sixteen" from plume
You had a good background for the crossover, which is better than 50% of the genre right away, and it was a plus that it was Willow-centric. I can buy Willow is running scared, and I can even swallow with ill grace she is immediately (randomly) attracted to a guy she just met because he reminds her of Giles.

What I can't really buy into is her acting stupid. For a black-ops trained Major AND world hopping witch, she lets everyone push her around. I do mean everyone. Plus she is a witch with all sorts of new powerful knowledge stuffed inside her head. I'd like to think she'd have the ability to hide her use of magic, especially the small stuff. You know, stuff like a demon tracking spell? I don't really understand why she didn't ditch the newbie, take out (perhaps capture) the demon with camouflaged locater and invisibility spells, and get the hell out of there.

Then when Willow finally gets to the point where she spills, and goes on the rescue mission, she forgets her black ops and hard won survival training in hostile territory? I like Willow-centered strong protagonist fiction, and I thought this one had a lot of promise. But I really like my main characters to act smarter than the average bear.

So while I thought the story had a lot of potential, I don't think it lived up to that potential. Stopping at end of part 16.
Review By [plume] • Date [1 Sep 07] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Part Twenty-nine & Thirty" from Jalimar
just read this part, an odd take, but a good read. ill probably read the rest of the series this week. keep up the good work
Review By [Jalimar] • Date [4 Feb 07] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Part Twenty-nine & Thirty" from (Past Donor)Aynot
WWHHOOAA!!! Wow! The story rating scale does not go high enough for me about this story. This is a seriously good story, well written, well thought out, with almost all the character, perfectly in character. I had only a few minor quibbles about the story. Your had the emotion "Beautifully" done; you could feel Willow's pain, as well her fear, panic, and all the rest.
Review By [(Past Donor)Aynot] • Date [16 Jan 07] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Part Twenty-nine & Thirty" from (Moderator)Demona
This is amazing Laney. I have been meaning to get around to this for a long time, but seeing as it is an epic of all epic proportions I wanted to make sure I had the time to properly devote to it. I can't wait to dive into the next part and see what is in store for Willow, Faith, and the universe at large.
Review By [(Moderator)Demona] • Date [7 Apr 06] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Part Twenty-nine & Thirty" from arkeus
oh my. That was quite good :-)
it is only like a prologue so far, bu things are nicely wven together...
Review By [arkeus] • Date [31 Mar 06] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Part Twenty three & Twenty Four" from arkeus
very good so far, though i am surprised at how clueless they all are :p
Review By [arkeus] • Date [31 Mar 06] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Part Eight" from arkeus
grin :-)
Things are getting good :-)
Review By [arkeus] • Date [31 Mar 06] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Part Three" from arkeus
great beginning, and this willow isn't as bad as the other, and hopefully won't get her power stripped from her :-)
Review By [arkeus] • Date [31 Mar 06] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "World Without" from arkeus
wow...very, very good :-)
i was hoping for super willow though, but we might still see that :-)
Review By [arkeus] • Date [31 Mar 06] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Part Twenty-nine & Thirty" from Ansku
Great story :)
Review By [Ansku] • Date [26 Jan 06] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of story "World Without I: Parts 1-30" from Anonymous Reviewer
This is my first time looking at this particular story of yours. I'm enjoying it a lot, even from the first chapter. Life is busy now, so I may only read and enjoy from here, but I will try to send you the occasional affirmation on parts that I particularly liked.
Review By [Anonymous Reviewer] • Date [27 Nov 03] • Not Rated • Add Comment
start back Page: 2 of 3 next end
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