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Review of chapter "Paint Me Bitter" from laoshi
Review:
I’d honestly forgotten Damian didn’t have his basement coffin in Anita’s house by this point in the story. I understand that in some respects Anita could be considered more of an enforcer than a leader but and I know Nathaniel worries about his place with Anita but it does seem a little OOC for him to be thinking she isn’t one.
Review By [laoshi] • Date [8 May 10] • Rating [7 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Relationships" from laoshi
Review:
Pam is a well written OC. That was a bit of a close call with her catching Asher's name. It's nice to see Buffy having a positive effect on Richard's life even if it is unintentionally.
Review By [laoshi] • Date [8 May 10] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Rumor Mill" from laoshi
Review:
If you want a high school teacher’s perspective on this chapter I can tell you it feels very realistic. Teachers sometimes succumb to gossip just like students but in this case I agree it is reprehensible. Buffy wanting to go back and have a high school experience where someone doesn’t try to kill her every week is perfectly understandable.
Review By [laoshi] • Date [8 May 10] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "In the Dark" from laoshi
Review:
Will the real Buffy Summers please stand up? I liked that Buffy and Asher could unburden themselves and relax while Buffy still retained her distrust. As you said Asher hasn’t done anything to earn it yet. Awesome reveal on Buffy’s hair and on always feeling cold.
Review By [laoshi] • Date [8 May 10] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Humanity in Silence" from laoshi
Review:
Watching Buffy and Asher dance around revealing tantalising glimpses of themselves to each other is mesmerizing to watch. Saying the left her long before she left them is a wonderful way to put it. Your lack of ticklishness is a weight off my mind. Also great way to end the chapter.
Review By [laoshi] • Date [7 May 10] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Bitterness and Sleep" from laoshi
Review:
This one really makes me feel for Anita. What's that line Hamilton always liked to quote in the earlier books? If all you have is a hammer every problem starts to look like a nail. Anger has kind of become Anita's default setting but it seems like she's finally come to the end of it or at least realized Executioners cannot live by rage alone.
Review By [laoshi] • Date [3 May 10] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Questions" from laoshi
Review:
Micah isn’t a character whose viewpoint I’ve read a lot before but you do seem to have a firm grasp on his perspective. His frustration about his own failings is readily apparent. Furnishing a dozen rooms is surely an offer Nathaniel couldn’t refuse.
Review By [laoshi] • Date [3 May 10] • Rating [7 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Apology" from laoshi
Review:
Anita’s wrong! She said it. There are no take backs. She should just stand there and be wrong in her wrongness so we can admire her wrongosity. Maybe the reason why Anita and Richard will never work is because in the told you so stakes they ate so similar. I loved the crack about Anita stitching her new motto on a pillow.
Review By [laoshi] • Date [3 May 10] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Denmark" from laoshi
Review:
One of the things I like the most about crossover fanfiction is how a character from one fandom can make a character from another completely reevaluate their world view. Buffy’s effect on Richard is a pretty decent example of this. If Anita has anything tattooed on her forehead it’s make a short joke and die. Oh and nice Shakespeare reference.
Review By [laoshi] • Date [3 May 10] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Old Language" from laoshi
Review:
Okay I’m a bit of a language geek so I loved all the stuff with this ur-language the runes are written in. And that is a very cool rendition of the beginning of the slayer myth.
Review By [laoshi] • Date [3 May 10] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Tattoo" from laoshi
Review:
Nice reference to Joyce and Spike’s hot chocolate sessions. I think all the readers are as curious as Damian and Asher. Way to deepen the mystery.
Review By [laoshi] • Date [3 May 10] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Steel and Velvet" from laoshi
Review:
Strong enough to have mercy is a great phrase. You do a great job of conveying what Damian and Asher are looking for in Buffy. In your mind what was the fear that Damian thinks gives Buffy her understanding of weakness? Any of the big bads she’s faced? Knowing she was going to die? The fear of failing her friends? What the Powers That Be put her through? What made you decide to do the chapter entirely from Damian’s viewpoint rather than having Asher try to articulate his own needs? When Damian refers to God is he talking about the Christian Deity. In the books I believe there is a scene where Damian talks about the raid in which he first encounters Moroven. I can’t remember if he refers to his religious beliefs or not. But does he pray to the Norse pantheon or has he converted since becoming a vampire? Or had he become a Christian while he was alive?
Comments from author:
Questions in order of appearance:

I didn't think of Buffy's fear as one concrete thing, but rather a mess of everything she's faced. Dying, living, Angel, Spike, end of the world, end of the world, end of the world, Scooby betrayal. The list goes on.

I didn't so much pick Damien's perspective on the scene, but I decided to write Damien and he came up with the scene. He's easier than Asher though, because he's not so angry.

As for god, I'm guessing Odin. He was kind of a favorite for warriors, and Damien said he was that. All assumptions on my part though.

Thanks for the continued feedback. I enjoy it.

Cheers.
Review By [laoshi] • Date [3 May 10] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Safety in Numbers" from laoshi
Review:
Chris is a very interesting OC. The immediacy of his worries and the poignancy of his story were both readily apparent in the chapter. It was a great way to reveal some more of Buffy's back story and the hug at the end was very sweet.
Review By [laoshi] • Date [2 May 10] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Dropping Shoes" from laoshi
Review:
A very revealing chapter. I know you don't much care for the Scoobies which is why you write so many stories where Buffy is transported to another world or has left them. I don't want to get into the whole issue of whether your criticisms of them are valid I well just say it fits the general tone of the story and that this chapter was as well written as the others.
Review By [laoshi] • Date [2 May 10] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Morning Musings" from laoshi
Review:
You write Jean Claude well, although I'm amazed at the difference between this Jean Claude and the one from Paradise Lost. I know he has a very different relationship with Buffy in this story but he does seem a little too unfeeling.
Review By [laoshi] • Date [30 Apr 10] • Rating [7 out of 10]
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