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Review of chapter "Chapter 3-Home" from karmasfriend
Review:
I like it, espescially the bits where she's talking with Naruto. You might want to add a bit more description though, anyway very, very bueno!
Comments from author:
Yeah, I'm not the best with the detail. I've been trying to give some more detail to the scenario and stuff, but I'm trying to put the story in a time frame I don't know a whole lot about, so it'll probably get better once I watch more of the Anime. I don't like giving miss-info without knowing it.
Review By [karmasfriend] • Date [12 Mar 08] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 3-Home" from NutsContract
Review:
Holy shit that's a long ass time. Akegata... I'm not too good with Japanese words.... does it mean anything? Is that her name or a code name? Are you going to be updating soon? Is Dawn gonna get some nooky?
Comments from author:
Yeah, I know it's been a while. Akegata is supposed to mean Dawn in Japanese, but I used an online translator so it may be off. I know, not as cool as a code name. I'll try to update soon but it really just matters how busy I am. I'm just figuring the story out as I go, but if I put romance in it'll probably be pretty non-explicit.

Okay, I've been thinking more about pairings and stuff, and unless I think of something really good it will probably stay as a friendship fic. Also, I wanted to run an idea by people before I publish the next chapter, that I just have a little editing left on (though it's short like the other chapters)! Anyway, I was thinking of making Dawn Orochimaru's little sister, which is how she became friends with Tsunade. What do the people think? Before I publish again, ppplllleeeaaassse! AND THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR REVIEWING ZAYKA!!
Review By [NutsContract] • Date [12 Mar 08] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Traveling" from NutsContract
Review:
I think Dawn should see Kakashi first... just 'cause I love Kakashi!! =] Or maybe Naruto..? Cause he's a loud mouth, and it would just be funny as hell 'cause he'd probably find some way to insult either her or Tsunade... or everyone... UPDATE!
Comments from author:
I can try it with Naruto leading her to see Tsunade or something, but I'm not quite sure how I'd put Kakashi in, I'll see how it works out in the writing though. Thank you so much!!
Review By [NutsContract] • Date [17 Feb 08] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Traveling" from Skoellya
Review:
Hey, interesting. All I can say is that I would prefer longer chapters, but the idea's good and unique. I do feel there should be some Naruto in there... because he is the protagonist after all, and one of the closest people to Tsunade (but I'm bias, I'm just happy to see another Naruto story). I'd comment more, but I don't know if you've read all the manga up to date as I like to. Thought the greek(? I guessed) incantation was nice. Most people don't bother. Like I said, write some more and I'll have a more thorough idea of what's going on, but from your effort so far it looks promising.
Comments from author:
Thank you!! I have not read much of the manga, I'm on shippuden 30 of the anime. I'm writing it like she came back right at the beginning of shippuden, about when they get back from saving Gaara. If there are any other suggestions just let me now, I'm still working out the time frame, if you think she would do better coming at a different time, but I don't want to put her much more ahead in the time frame until I've watched more of the episodes. I'll try to make the chapters longer but it will take me a bit more time to update. Yes it is greek, except for the final two words that are in latin. Thanks again!!
Review By [Skoellya] • Date [16 Feb 08] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter One" from Rebelgirl
Review:
Interesting, aside of the Kohonaha response when Dawn gets back, it's the Buffy response that I wanna see. Boom is it?

Cushty!
Comments from author:
Yeah, but I want to keep the Buffy involvement at a minimum, though she'll come in every now and again.
Review By [Rebelgirl] • Date [16 Feb 08] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter One" from NutsContract
Review:
She was friends with Tsunade? So she's going to go back and be super young, and all her friends will either be really old or dead... Awesome!! That'll make everyone feel awkward.
Comments from author:
That sums it up pretty well. I think I have Tsunade's response mapped out, but I'm not sure who else Dawn should see. Do you have any thoughts on who else she should find? I'm welcome to suggestions, and thank you for reviewing!!
Review By [NutsContract] • Date [16 Feb 08] • Not Rated
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