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Dungeon Monk Xander Origin

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Review of chapter "Chapter 3: USS Voyager and Rommie" from ReflectionsOfReality
Review:
This is the first but probably not the last instance where you are going to have them touch true realities and alter timelines now that there is precedent, so do you think that towards the end of this story line you could be convinced to maybe see the end results of their alterations? Just single scenes of final victories or altered major events to sort of illustrate what effects such alterations would result in...

I don't know if I want to even contemplate the implications of BtVS universe being a part of the Star Wars universe AND being in the middle of that story. The easiest answer I can see for the Force users and in particular the Sith not being interested in Earth is if their is something as repulsive of the solar system as the potential power available to someone there, maybe like something like it being on dimensional weak point causes a loss of control of the Force as well as its presence... maybe even the local space might have different laws of physics so that the Sol solar system actually could be like the galactic Bermuda Triangle...

Eh I am sure you have alread worked out some reasoning but feel free to use any idea that I present in any review unless I have specifically requested for it not to be.

~Reflections
Comments from author:
Reflections, that's a great idea! One part scenes of victory, or possible defeat because of the altered timelines. I can do that :)

Yep, cause I wanted to go a different direction with this story and not stick to the old BTVS/SG-1 formula, I've already has one story that do that. Might as well try something new.

On a side note, your idea of a galactic Bermuda Triangle is cool! I am using that, thank you! That will explain why only Earth has the Hellmouths and why we never see anything of the sort in the Star Wars world.

By the way Reflections, thanks for boosting up my muse :) Your constructive ideas are going to be great in helping me beef up the story.
Review By [ReflectionsOfReality] • Date [9 Nov 08] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter 3: USS Voyager and Rommie" from Bluesnowman
Review:
Truly awesome work.
Comments from author:
Thank you! Nice to see you Bluesnowman.
Review By [Bluesnowman] • Date [9 Nov 08] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter 3: USS Voyager and Rommie" from grd
Review:
With all the reality fun, some suggestions: David Edding's Belgariad series, Halo, Raymond Feist's Riftwar saga, Babylon 5, Star Wars, ... just some ideas for areas I hope the Scoobies get to raid.

Their return to their universe will be very entertaining especially when they encounter the alien races of their universe and screw with the PTB's plans royally.
Comments from author:
Oh! I am planning a Babylon 5 and Star Wars, but Halo sounds like a good idea as well, I'll see how that works out. The Belgariad series... I read the first few chapters but never finished, is it really good? Maybe I will go home and pick up the book again, cause I remember there was a lot of lengthy sentences which could really be summarised into a few words. :p But it's been a long time since I read it so I might be mistaken.

Yeah, Buffy's much more then a Slayer now. In fact the entire Slayer line has been changed, a plot device in which I am using to move the Slayers out of the hands of the PTB and Watcher's Council.
Review By [grd] • Date [9 Nov 08] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter 3: USS Voyager and Rommie" from Ahdamnit
Review:
Firstly, your Xander needs to grow a backbone and not allow the girls to run roughshod over him like they did with the ships. It's going to bring no end of trouble seeing as neither of the two (neither Buffy nor Cordelia) has very good judgment. For this reason Xander needs to force them to show better judgment. He'd be destroyed if he let them do whatever they like, like they are doing now, and it hurt or got one of the group killed. They're his powers and he needs to be much more responsible for them.

Secondly, Willow should be known as Willow the Unwise and you're just letting her run around in that ship unsupervised? She never shows good judgment when dealing with things she likes (magic, attention, etc...). What do you think will happen when she tries to showoff her knowledge back in the real world (most likely without thinking about what she's doing or what the consequences of her actions will be, and most likely not telling any of the others what she's going to do before she does it)? It'll be full throttle and damn the consequences. She needs to learn what commonsense and restraint are and how to make use of them both before she gets all of them in deep shit.

Thirdly, I'd like for there to be some consequences for the actions that they took in regards to Rommie's home universe. They just threw a jumbo-sized monkey wrench into someone's plans and I doubt that kind of thing can possibly go unnoticed. This should show them that when messing with stuff you will always have to think about who is going to be messing back and whether or not it's worth the hassle/pain/shit that going to come as a result of it. All actions have consequences and they probably haven't grasped that fact yet.

Grammatically you make it quite clear that you aren't a native English speaker. Watch out for bad word choice/usage, bad or odd sounding sentences, tense shifting, and missing words among other things. In short you need a beta.

Edit: Oh yeah, one other thing. WTF is a scobby? Is that like some sorta animal or something?
Comments from author:
Ahdamnit thanks for your comments! You're like my backup muse ^_^ Your highlight about Buffy and Cordelia gave me new inspiration for the story :D Maybe if Xander keeps bowing to them, something bad will happen... and Xander will learn more about taking control. ^_^" well I am starting to draft out the idea, but it'll be a while be4 I can write it.

About Willow... I am ashamed to say that it slipped my mind about her tendencies to go dark. I'll have to think of something to make others aware of her flaws and help her or maybe I can use her new powers to make her aware of her own fallings... hmmm

I am keeping a look out for a beta :) if you know any one interested in this story, you can let me know as well.

ps. my bad, I mean to say Scooby ^_^ scobby is the imaginary animal of bad fanfiction :p
Review By [Ahdamnit] • Date [9 Nov 08] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 3: USS Voyager and Rommie" from randombugger
Review:
One 'verse to use Warhammer 40000. Bolters.
Comments from author:
Yep! I am hoping to make a WarHammer 40K dungeon! But I don't think Buffy and the others are able to deal with a squad of space wolves or chaos marines anytime soon.

Most probably I'll have Xander 'find' the reality and save it for when they are powerful enough.
Review By [randombugger] • Date [9 Nov 08] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 3: USS Voyager and Rommie" from Bobboky
Review:
sweet
Comments from author:
thanks! :)
Review By [Bobboky] • Date [9 Nov 08] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 3: USS Voyager and Rommie" from Thedruid
Review:
Good overpower story, though are you combining BTVS and the Jedi verse as one for purposes of this story?
Comments from author:
Yeah! You've got it :D The timeline is pre-Anakin. Before Anakin becomes a jedi. But the real Star Wars crossover wouldn't begin anytime soon though, I am hoping for a Firefly crossover before I start on Star Wars.

But since I hadn't write it yet, just treat everything I say with a grain of salt until the chapters really come out :p
Review By [Thedruid] • Date [9 Nov 08] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 3: USS Voyager and Rommie" from ilalthal
Review:
good story and all. but the dialog seems a bit clumsy. you also seem to repeat a few words alot.

please continue
Comments from author:
*Wince* yeah I notice it when I re-read the story, I'll do a total re-edit once I have some time. By the way, thanks for the review!
Review By [ilalthal] • Date [9 Nov 08] • Rating [6 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter 2: Honking big ship and the new base" from Toras
Review:
This is a fascinating story. Don't recognize the character of the Dungeon Monk but I have to say that I enjoyed this a great deal. I look forward to seeing what you do with this in the future, if the stuff you already have posted is any indication it should be great fun.
Comments from author:
^_^ Thanks Toras! I'll try not to disappoint!
Review By [Toras] • Date [31 Oct 08] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 2: Honking big ship and the new base" from Dragonelf
Review:
Yay, new chapter.

Considering that Anya teleported herself home, we can be pretty certain that D'Hoffryn will become aware that there is a new dimension walker around. I wonder if the gang will run into Q during their dungeon visits or otherwise attract his attention?

::Gives the plot bunny some carrot stew::

#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#
Don't anthropomorphize
computers -- they hate it.
- Anonymous
#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#
Comments from author:
That's my plan ^_^ Hmm about Q... I am not sure how I can add him in, I'll think about it!
Review By [Dragonelf] • Date [18 Oct 08] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 2: Honking big ship and the new base" from (Current Donor)dogbertcarroll
Review:
7 of 9 is the most likely person to be 'alive' on the ship and of course the doctor will be there. I wouldn't have Xan moving the ship home, but it'd be a perfect place to base themselves from in his dimensional pocket. Comfy and with all futuristic amenities, including a doc who's out of this world.
You could even have 7 want to return to a 'real' Voyager and have Xan help her do so, by stepping onto a Voyager with her. Of course that would attract the attention of Q.

I'd say Anya's boss would be more interested in hiring Xander than anything else. He could have Xander create a suitable reality for his girls to train in, as he is a bit protective of them, and they get lots of pretties to take home with them along with additional skills. Those staffs would be invaluable in training anyone and everyone, not to mention what other similar doodads are available. Healing magic may normally be rare and dangerous, but the setup lends itself to discovering items that would work perfectly for that effect. I'd say Hoffy would be a fool not to hire him or arrange a mutual exchange of favors and Hoffy is no fool.

Travers is going to have serious problems. The best thing he could do, would be to request Xander to train a loyal Watcher to do what he does. Somehow I don't see him being that bright, but there is always the chance. The worst thing he can do is try and force Xander to obey him by taking one of the girls hostage. Of course teleporting everyone to his homebase kinda negates that effect and hiding them from him just means he'd have to go and bring Voyager back to beam them out of confinement.

We also shouldn't overlook the possibility of going to other worlds. I'm sure Xander has a lot of places he'd love to visit, not to mention everyone else.
Comments from author:
I'll try to find ways to integrate 7 of 9. She's a cool character as well! The idea of Anya's boss hiring Xander bears merit, I can use that idea to bring Anya into the group, or something like that :)

About the watcher's council, there will be a confrontation once they get back to the real world, I am still planning in out.

And yeah I am hoping that after the events of Season 2, I can do a real Firefly crossover by having Xander take the girls to that reality for vacation. But it's all still in the works.
Review By [(Current Donor)dogbertcarroll] • Date [18 Oct 08] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 2: Honking big ship and the new base" from war
Review:
good story looking forward to your next chapter.
Comments from author:
thanks you!
Review By [war] • Date [17 Oct 08] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter 2: Honking big ship and the new base" from Bluesnowman
Review:
Wonderful and awesome story so far. I can not wait for more.
Comments from author:
^_^ thanks for the encouragement.
Review By [Bluesnowman] • Date [17 Oct 08] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter 2: Honking big ship and the new base" from kyzhart
Review:
I love the concept. It's looking like fun.
Comments from author:
:) I know, I am having fun too. Let me know if you've any dungeon crossover ideas you want to bounce off me.
Review By [kyzhart] • Date [17 Oct 08] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter 2: Honking big ship and the new base" from userid
Review:
Nice they will have a nice powerful ship to place in orbit over the town. Remember it will take them 10 minutes to get the ship to orbit if he cant teleport it there. If you go any faster it will leave a large sonic boom.

Having the ship will do a few things. 1. a very strong base over the hellmouth. 2. High powered scaners to help track anything in town. 3. Access to high tech weapons. and D. makes them a superpower (Californian blond with access to high powered bombs?)

How much of a problem with the Watchers be with their drive for power?
Review By [userid] • Date [17 Oct 08] • Rating [9 out of 10]
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