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My Revenge ends now...or not...

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Review of chapter "Chapter 3" from lillyb
excellent EXCELLENT I SAY... (while rubbing my hands together in evil glee:)
seriously though you need a good beta, but good job on the basics. though you could stand to give more back story or flesh things out more. The principle is sound but I feel like I missed something and at a few points the grammar was a little jumbled. Don't get discouraged though and don't give up no matter what people say, I once saw an original copy of one of the chapters of "Drums of Autumn" by Dianna Gabaldon (Google her if you don't know the name shes excellent) And that thing was covered with so much red it looked like it was bleeding. Every good writer needs a good editor or beta its a teem effort.
Comments from author:
thank you for that and I'm really lucky that I've Inachis looking over the story, without here it would be much worse than it is and yes read a bit of Miss Gabaldon, but I gave up after the book where they lived in the Colonies.
Review By [lillyb] • Date [23 Aug 10] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter 3" from Bobboky
Review By [Bobboky] • Date [23 Aug 10] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 2" from wjenks
Please don't stop this story Its getting good. Can't wait to see where you go from here.
Comments from author:
ahh be assured my plans for this story grew just a bit......
Review By [wjenks] • Date [2 Aug 10] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 2" from evilredknight
You know I pretty much hate Xander-Sue stories.
But I like this one.
Xan's mom - former potential???

Just 1 thing, please no Xander more powerful then Buffy, or Buffy jealous of Xander, or any of the other really bad standard crap people put in these kinds of stories. There a real turn off.

I would love that Xander's real power comes from 2 things, that the chaos blades can kill gods(or powers). Yes I can see him being utterly skilled in their use.

The other thing to do would be sort of like Sparhawk in the Books by David Eddings. Xander becomes a man 'without destiny'. Gods and Powers cant 'find' or see Xander in the spirit world. They cant see Xander's future actions, so they cant create a defense against him.

Just think that would be kind of cool to play off Xander ' man without a destiny' best friends with Buffy, who has an almost overwhelming one(how many prophesies are about her time?).
Comments from author:
to Xan's mom we will see....

to Xander his Olympian blood got activated which will grant him a bit more than a normal human, but doesn't make him into a god,yet, but he is currently trained by Kratos, a not so nice Spartan Warrior, so you can guess what Xander's training will look like and that his skill level will be far above that of Buffy, which just is a gifted girl with no real training, just a bit of sparring with her watcher and as shown in this chapter Buffy still acts more as a friend than the normal air headed attitude she has.

To the chaos blades...yes they can do that...just ask Kratos....he killed most of the Olympian host with them *g* and Xander will be skilled in their use and more *g* and Xander was already a corn in the powers eyes before *g*
Review By [evilredknight] • Date [2 Aug 10] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 2" from Bobboky
nice work
Review By [Bobboky] • Date [2 Aug 10] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 2" from Eureka
Please write more...I want to know what it was she signed and why she acted like she did.
Comments from author:
ahh shouldn't be hard to guess what she signed and why...yes I think Giles would like to know that as well *g*
Review By [Eureka] • Date [2 Aug 10] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter 2" from rocky
I really hope you were joking about 'no plans to continue' because leaving off at either ends of the chapters is not a good idea.
I really hope that you continue with the fic its good.
Comments from author:
nah I really had not planned to write more after ch1, but then my muse clubbed me over the head with more ideas. I'm just not the fastest guy in bringing them to paper *g*
Review By [rocky] • Date [2 Aug 10] • Rating [9 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter One" from (Current Donor)dogbertcarroll
Nice start to a series.
Comments from author:
tx, even if I don't now how far I will take it, ch is written and of to beta readin
Review By [(Current Donor)dogbertcarroll] • Date [24 Jul 10] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter One" from PsychoWing
Cool. Just wondering, but are you planning to follow-up on this?
Comments from author:
not sure yet, I have a few ideas, but i need to play them out a bit before i write more. Just had to write that chapter here after finishing GOW 3 *g*
Review By [PsychoWing] • Date [21 Jul 10] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter One" from eriktheviking
Xander's involved, of course it won't go as expected. Great opening.
Review By [eriktheviking] • Date [20 Jul 10] • Rating [9 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter One" from (Recent Donor)drdeth
Brilliant start, I hope you will continue this or had a sequel. I would love to see what happens to Ethan when Kratos gets hold of him.
Comments from author:
ahhh I would say that encounter wouldn't be long....Kratos is very quick with the use of this blades *g*
Review By [(Recent Donor)drdeth] • Date [20 Jul 10] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter One" from ShadowKage
Very nice. An interesting start to something that can most definitely be expanded upon. Are you going to make a sequel or continue this story further?
Comments from author:
not really sure yet.... I have a few ideas how to go on but nothing really planned out yet, but of one thing thing you can be sure...If Kratos teaches Xander he won't be the nice donut boy anymore *g*
Review By [ShadowKage] • Date [20 Jul 10] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter One" from Bobboky
Review By [Bobboky] • Date [20 Jul 10] • Not Rated
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