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He's Fast, She's Furious

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Review of chapter "Chapter Seven" from copycatloki
Review:
Nice story so far, I just hope it doesn't turn into downright bashing of any character in future chapters... D=

Other than that I have just one tiny question: Why do you insist on writing after each chapter "End"? Every time I read it I go "What the hell? How can this be the end?!" before I continue reading and see the "this story is incomplete"-message from TtH underneath the story.

[Edit To Reply]: How I wish there was an answer feature >_<

Oh, I know how Cordy is and that she has about as much tact as a sledgehammer to the face but I have read stories where it started with just one character's opinion of another character...and suddenly the next chapters were filled with bashing. It was not just the "bimbo" but also the "manipulative redhead" part that made me worry this was going to turn into a bash-fic...I just wanted to make sure it wouldn't be one of those.
I hate character bashing, even when the target is a character I don't like... ._.

Eh, he could have probably been in the in-crowd...as you said, he was athletic enough to join the swim team so he would have made a good "jock" (with lots more of brain though XD). I assume that Xander 1) simply didn't want to be part of the in-crowd (he never makes any attempts to) and 2) that he simply didn't want to lose Willow and Jesse as friends since both hardly would have been able to join the "in-crowd" (Willow = super smart geeky girl / Jeese = ...simply the type of unpopular guy you target as in-crowd-person...)

Ah, I see. Thanks for answering that.
Comments from author:
You have to remember, that this is from the character's POV. Cordy was never one to mince words simply to be polite, she's going to say what she feels. The 'bimbo' comment, I don't agree with.

But you can't argue that Xander couldn't have been with the in-crowd if he'd applied himself. He was athletic enough to be on the swim team, and Cordy drooled over his body before she realized it was him. What (or who) else could have kept him from doing so?

Regardless, I can honestly say this is the first time someone has brought up character bashing with my stories. I just don't see the point of turning off possible readers to a story, simply by doing so.

When I wrote my first story, it was very long, and I needed to cut it down into chapters. Putting the end there was just the way to know where to look. After posting the first two, and forgetting to take it off, I just decided to leave it, too busy working on the next chapter. It just kind of stuck and I've done it with all of them since then.

Thank you for the review.

[Edit To Reply Reply:]

While Cordy did have some contact with Willow over the phone after joining AI, I don't think they really made a firm friendship until late season 2. I think that she was still smarting over the whole 'fluke' thing, and having Xander back in her life opened up old wounds.

I agree that more then likely, Xander would have never wanted to be in the in-crowd. I don't think he could gain the nasty personality needed to do so. But from Cordy's perspective, she saw it simply as his need to protect Willow.

Honestly, the subject of the slay gang isn't going to come up in this fic. While they will make appearances, I can assure you I will not be going out of my way to bash any of them.

Thank you for the insight.
Review By [copycatloki] • Date [20 Dec 10] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Eight" from bucksavage
Review:
After reading the last couple chapters, I am really liking the POV style a lot more each chapter, but it'd be nice to see some other Scoobies make appearances here and there; I can see Oz fitting nicely, though not werewolf-Oz.
Comments from author:
I originally did the POV thing simply because I was a new writer, and found it easier to do. As time went on, especially after I started switching between Xander and Cordelia in 'Headhunters', I realized I'd found my niche.

To be honest, I'm mostly a C/X situation writer. I set something up, and drop the two of them in it, usually far away from Sunnydale and the slay gang. This is mostly due to mid to late into the series, it became the Buffy/Willow/Spike show, and screw everybody else.

I've never really gotten over my annoyance for the characters, so rather then bash them, I just don't use them. Oz on the other hand, he's a cool guy, I'll think that one over. No promises though.

Thanks for the review.
Review By [bucksavage] • Date [19 Dec 10] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Eight" from msdarque
Review:
Surprising, but wonderful chapter! Congrats!
Is it really the end or will there be more? I'd definitely be interested if there were.. :)
Comments from author:
Glad you've like it, and this is in no way the end. I'm in the process of working on several more future chapters. I removed the visions because I wanted to focus more on the FatF side of the cross.

Thanks for the review.
Review By [msdarque] • Date [19 Dec 10] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Eight" from MBB
Review:
I was hesitant about following this story because I do not know the crossover show, and the initial changes to Xander seemed HUGE.

You sum it up pretty well in this sentence:
"I couldn't believe how much he'd changed. He was confident, dressed nicely, and had people around him that treated him like family."
[not Xander, not Xander, rejection of Xander's old friends]
And what's with the name change, is this 'Alex' an existing character in 'Fast and the Furious' that you merged Xander with?
Even then, Cordelia thinking of him as Xander remains weird.

*****

The previous few chapters made me start liking the story, partially because of the way you wrote their interaction.
But mostly because you clearly showed Xander's past (watching Buffy and Angel) as motivation for his behaviour. And how this lead to a more mature behaviour which paid off, etc.


*****

This chapter was a little to a lot disappointing, depending on how it develops and how close I keep following the story.
*UNLESS this 'woman in white' is from this ' Fast and the Furious'. Then just ignore following comments and introduce her in the next chapter. *

But switching suddenly to an OC PTB goes against he show (they only were in direct interaction and even then usually cryptic), did not fit with the story so far, and was unnecessary. (They could just the stopped visions as speculation)

Secondly, the absents of visions feels like a cop-out. They had by then become an important part of Cordelia's character and story.
Also, they are this moment of your story the only link left with the supernatural. (Xander is out, Cordelia almost out)
and Finally, it takes away all pressure from Cordelia to make a choice about abandoning her mission.
Comments from author:
I made it clear from the outset that Xander had been in LA for about a year. In that amount of time, I would say that anyone would change. How is this not Xander, when he did the same on the show?

He grew confident and successful as he moved up within the construction company he worked for. He obviously dressed better as the show progressed, and matured. The only difference being he didn't do it in Sunnydale.

As to the 'complete rejection of Xander's old friend', did Cordelia reject the slay gang when she found a family in AI? A new family does not mean the old is bad, just different. This was more pointed toward Xander's crappy home life then anything.

Back to mature Xander, which is short for Alexander, so is Alex. 'Xander' is a nickname he's had since kindergarten. Can't one decide they want to make a change in their lives?

There is no merged character here, it's simply Xander without the goofiness. And of course Cordelia still thinks of him as Xander, she's known the guy her whole life. That doesn't mean she isn't impressed by his changes.

---

The woman in white is simply a dimensional traveler, righting wrongs as she sees them. No more, no less. She doesn't make things perfect, merely better. Her empowerment by The Voice is what makes what she does possible.

I've said before that I am leaning more heavily toward the FatF side of the cross. While there will be some interactions with vampires and demons, mostly it will be about C&X, cars and what they get up to as a result.

The visions are gone, simply because she and Alex aren't going to be running around saving people. What would be the point of having them? Almost all of the crosses on this site deal with the supernatural stuff, this just isn't one of them.

With Cordelia's need to make a choice, that's one she still has to make. Does she want to break up with AI for good, is she willing to deal with the illegal nature of what Alex and his friends do?

---

I'll be honest with you, if you don't like the story so far, I doubt you will in the future. While I hope that isn't true, I can't see it becoming anymore to your liking.

Thank you for your thoughts, and the review.
Review By [MBB] • Date [19 Dec 10] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Eight" from CrystalBlaze
Review:
This continues to amuse. I'll tell you the honest truth, if Jasmine were already born, I can easily imagine a smirking God grabbing the slut-baby and plopping it squarely onto Illyria's sarcophagus. The God-King could probably actually contain her own powers in the hostbody of a reborn Fallen Power, after all..
Comments from author:
Though I would like to see Jasmine get what's coming to her, I didn't see it as possible in this particular story. The bright lady almost always works alone. Plus, she has to have some limit in power, I felt that her going directly after Jasmine would have been too much.

Thank you for the review.
Review By [CrystalBlaze] • Date [19 Dec 10] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Eight" from RafMereC
Review:
Nice twist.
Raf
Comments from author:
Thank you.
Review By [RafMereC] • Date [18 Dec 10] • Rating [9 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Seven" from AlexanderMcpherson
Review:
this wouldn't be so bad if the chapters were a bit, you know... longer.

Nah, kiddin'. Well, about the 'be so bad' part. The chappies could do with being longer, but then I do tend to read stories which 10k per chapter.
Comments from author:
I understand what you're saying, I do prefer to read them that way myself. I made them short so I could put them out faster. I have several 'long-chapter' stories already, and they've bogged down.

Not having to make these huge chapters makes things a lot easier, it lets me publish something in a reasonable amount of time. It also frees me up to work on my other stories as well.

Glad you've liked it so far, and thanks for the review.
Review By [AlexanderMcpherson] • Date [16 Dec 10] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Seven" from msdarque
Review:
Quite an interesting story. I'd love to read more of it. :D
Congrats!
Comments from author:
Glad you've liked it so far, I'm hoping to put out at least one more chapter before the end of the year.

Thanks for the review.
Review By [msdarque] • Date [14 Dec 10] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Seven" from RafMereC
Review:
Nice update
Raf
Comments from author:
Thank you.
Review By [RafMereC] • Date [14 Dec 10] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Six" from eriktheviking
Review:
A well written introduction back into canon.
Comments from author:
I'm trying to get all of the intros and flashbacks out of the way, so I can really get into the story. Hopefully, I can clear the last of it up within a chapter or three.

Thank you for the review.
Review By [eriktheviking] • Date [6 Dec 10] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Six" from bucksavage
Review:
Hmm who would the woman from Angel's past be, well from memory I can only think of a few options; Darla, Drusilla or that werewolf lady from the later season of Angel...I forget her name.

I liked this chapter, and the way you flash back periodically to fill in parts of the conversations between the FNF crew and Xander when they first met and such. It helps to fill in the gaps.
Comments from author:
It is Darla, Cordelia just didn't want Xander to know for fear of what he might do. I'm going with the time frame where Cordy, Wes, and Gunn were fired because of the whole Darla and Drusilla eating the lawyers thing.

I'm glad the flashbacks are working. I didn't want to do the whole story from the beginning before Xander met up with Cordy, so I figured they were the next best thing.

Thank you for the review.
Review By [bucksavage] • Date [5 Dec 10] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Six" from LFW
Review:
Darla? Angel came off the rails on that arc . . .
So, you have going nuts since he is going to find out about her
Hoping for more
Comments from author:
Xander at this point, is probably more worried about losing Cordy again. He thinks he's got a shot, but he's going to have to eat a lot of shit for her to give him a chance. Hopefully, I'll have another one out no later then next week.

Thanks for the review.
Review By [LFW] • Date [5 Dec 10] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Five" from bucksavage
Review:
Good chapter! Seems like wherever Xander goes, the pick-on-Xanderfest lives on! I like how even Letty dug on him as well.
Comments from author:
Normally, I'd have him give as good as he gets, but when it's three on one, there just isn't a chance. With Letty and Mia both, I just wanted to show that with Xander being around for a year, that they were more then just casual acquaintances. The easiest way to do so, was by busting his balls.

Thank you for the review.
Review By [bucksavage] • Date [2 Dec 10] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Five" from RafMereC
Review:
Nice update

Raf
Comments from author:
Thank you.
Review By [RafMereC] • Date [1 Dec 10] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Four" from darkcarnage
Review:
This is a great story. Can't wait to read the next update.
Comments from author:
I'm hoping to put out another one in a few days. Glad you like it, and thanks for the review.
Review By [darkcarnage] • Date [28 Nov 10] • Not Rated
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