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Lonely Souls

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Review of chapter "Silver linings" from (Recent Donor)SamuraiCatFan
Review:
Looks like angry Joyce and real angry and scary Simon are going to get to come out to play-I can definitely see both of them going Beatrix Kiddo on anyone even remotely involved in harming family.
Comments from author:
Oh heavens no. Nothing as restrained as that.

Thanks for reviewing.
Review By [(Recent Donor)SamuraiCatFan] • Date [17 Nov 11] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Silver linings" from etienneofthewestwind
Review:
Well, I never expecting ingesting vampires would resurrect Amata's victims. I wonder if the effect's limited to just the two? Unfortunately, it seems that fair or not, Amata can't be allowed to survive.

Either there's spellwork involved in the Brenda mix-up, or the pre-Charmed Haliwell sisters had drifted further apart than suggested. And somehow I thing the young Miss Walsh is going to become a Hellmouth victim...
Comments from author:
Heh, you're never allowed to guess again. It's also the influence of the Hellmouth, at least a bit. As for Amata, more will be made clear in chapter 60.

As for Brenda Walsh, I hope that chapter 60 explains that for you too...

Thanks for reviewing and reading carefully.
Review By [etienneofthewestwind] • Date [17 Nov 11] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Silver linings" from Meneldur
Review:
And, we finally start to see the dark side.
This is scary, like, really scary. Prue's getting sexually assaulted (and maybe raped), The Master is trying to gather an army of evil dudes to kill everybody, the witches can't help because they're fighting Marigold, at the same time Lilac is about to start individually, Evil undead directors of the CIA are trying to gather souls and fight the witches, psychopathic mummy are wandering the town, killing people, we still have no idea what the Mayor or Sheila are doing... It's just scary. With so many threats surrounding them, how can they win? And there are also the regular things going on, like Cordelia's abuse.
But, I do like the characters and their relationships. And the witches seem to think they know what they're doing. Interesting that Lockhart is in the states, but just insures he won't escape vengeance. I'm surprised he still wants girl - I thought Snape castrated him.
Otherwise, I don't see very many problems. Simon is actually training Willow and Amy. If they manage to get rid of the current threats, it may even calm down and allow the plot to move a bit more in whatever direction it needs to go. Unless that direction is where it's going now.
As usual, my only problem is that Willow and Dave are too much into each other, and that means Willow/Tara isn't happening. And the way the plot will move, I'm afraid that if they become too invested, they won't move from the partners they find. And as nice as Dave is, he's just that... nice. Uninteresting to me. II can see the relationship between Tara and Willow taking time, but I just don't know if they have that time.
I don't know about how you plan to do it, but you're right that as of recent chapters, the plot has slowed down. I think it's because of the multiplicity of events and threats, as well as characters. If they get rid of the Master, the Scoobies can concentrate on Sunnydale, The Witches on Marigold, the Charmed Ones on San Francisco, etc. Of course, you may not want that... but as I see it, as long as they keep having family problems, crisises and threats, they're not going anywhere. And the plot won't move. I mean, we haven't even handled the Stargate thing, or what Janet is going to do, or Arlene, or Eileen's judgement, not to mention 'minor' things like Jenny and Giles, to say nothing of the major threats already mentioned.
Don't get me wrong, I love this work - but at this point I start to get the feeling it's unraveling in too many characters and directions. I mean, we haven't even seriously entered Highlander or Harry Potter, which is a completely separate world on the other side of the world, not to mention that other major characters like Faith haven't appeared yet either.
I love this work, I think it's brilliant, and I'll keep reading and reviewing. I just think that we may be having an overload of characters, events and information. It's not a problem that the extended family comes by on weekends... but it becomes a problem when each time there's some problem that requires everybody staying and many chapters devote to one weekend.
In any case, can't wait for replies to my reviews and more chapters, Meneldur.

EDIT: Really? Well, it's comforting to know that it will happen, at the least. Still, many seasons is relative. I'm assuming you mean TV Seasons. But already we're (technically) is season 2, even though Buffy hasn't fought the Master at all. So... I'm hopeful. I hope it'll happen somewhere is season 4-5, or so, and probably before they really integrate with the Potterverse. So, wait and see, as always.
Comments from author:
Yes, quite dark. This is a set up for a number of chapters and occurences, of course. They have a great deal of firepower and a great many pwoerful enemies. Lockhart is like a cockroach, he keeps turning up and is hard to kill. The problem is that the largest sexual organ a human has is the brain. Regrettably Lockhart wasn't lobotomized.

Simon has been training the girls in the basics for a while, its just not very exciting. As for Tara and Willow, I fear that is many seasons ahead yet.

I do hope to speed up the story pretty soon.

Thanks for reviewing.
Review By [Meneldur] • Date [16 Nov 11] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Guardian Angels" from Meneldur
Review:
And, another stopping point, hopefully last before the end.
It's great to see how the entire family is getting back together, and is even healing past wounds. Eileen Beckforth is apparently coming to Sunnydale, and it seems she has a young daughter with mother powers, named Tara. For some reason Janet is as well, because of a family crisis - Eileen, perhaps? I wonder if they can heal her, and what punishment would be levied on her.
Moreover, another one of the Five might be coming. Dawn mentioned a new student, family name of Juarez, no? I guess we shall see.
I loved the Willow hacking segments. Those were awesome. Nerdanel is an excellent handle. But I want a poster of her as well! I never saw any in all my art searches of the web. I do wonder who Witchqueen is, though.
Stargate and Mummy are also coming to Sunnydale, and great fun is going to be had by all. At this point, they'll have enough power to beat all their enemies. But things are wrong beneath the surface. Since when was Willow a triplet? What killed her sisters? Was it an accident? Or some ritual by Sheila, either to empower her or Willow? After all, if 3 had been born... they could have been the Charmed ones, no? And maybe if two were dead at birth, their power would transfer to the last? Which would be very scary. Because it would mean that as a spirit witch, Willow would have the power of the Charmed Ones... without even factoring her earth witch powers, which would be more powerful than Sheila's.
Where's the Mayor in all this mess? I doubt he's ignorant of it. And who knows what other enemies exist? I don't count Marigold as much of a threat, because they're already up on it.
Speaking of Willow's powers, I find it weird she and Amy aren't getting more training. Maybe it's all taking place off-screen, but we should be told of it at least. Sure, lots of stuff has been going on, but as we've seen, it's dangerous to leave Willow alone. Look what happened just with hacking. One traumatic death, and she may try a resurrection. And that would not be of the good.
I like the way all other storylines are progressing meanwhile. Wonder when Tara will come in, and how long she'll stay. Also regarding Harry Potter, but you already told me it'd be mentioned in LL and the Shaggy Dog, so I trust you on that. Sad thing is, Luna (and her father) will probably be the only wand wavers to treat them regularly.
Think that's all I've got to say. Love this, and going back for more!
Comments from author:
Heh, A pity, I'm enjoying these reviews. I don't have a Nerdanel poster either. I would like one too. But regrettably there none to be had....

Actually I hope to get things moving fairly soon, Amata is going to be a catalyst. Marigold is a great threat until they can deal with it.

Most of Amy and Willow's training isn't being mentioned, but it is taking place. It just takes time and the real magic will not start until they have abluaria.

Thanks and thanks for reviewing and glad you're enjoying it.
Review By [Meneldur] • Date [15 Nov 11] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Silver linings" from Zaz
Review:
I love reading this story.. but every once in a while you mention Joyce, who I understand is supposed to be a brilliant and loving parent, spanking her children. That makes me cringe. Please, please stop doing that. It propagates the lie that spanking is a good way to raise children. :(

There is a Time Magazine article called the long term effects of spanking that sheds more light on the subject.
Comments from author:
I've been thinking about this review of and on for several days, hence my late answer. I've read the article (and several others). I've also asked the opinion of several parents, including my own, and several psychologists of my acquaintance. And doing so has led me to the conclusion that most of these studies are focused on spanking being regular punishments.

So, for the record, Buffy has had less than a handful of spankings, Dawn has had one. It is not a punishment Joyce hands down regularly, mostly punishments are groundings, being sent to one's room, chores and more chores. Also chores. It is like the nuclear bomb, she hates using it, but she will if she thinks nothing else gets through.

I hope that explains Joyce's parenting methods and I hope that you will continue reading even if the content is not always completely to your liking.

Thanks for reviewing.
Review By [Zaz] • Date [14 Nov 11] • Rating [9 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Cheaper by the dozen" from Meneldur
Review:
Finally got to a sort of stopping point. And I've got only one thing to say: THIS IS AWESOMELY AMAZING!
Seriously, the way you seamlessly wove so many characters and fandoms together, not only patching worlds together, but also making them plausibly related and with the actual realistic effects that such separation would cause? Brilliant. There are no other words for it. I don't think I've got much to say, because I love everything you've done so far. Well, except for the Dave/Willow romance, but I only object to that because Willow/Tara is my OTP if there's a world where they're both alive. And since we've got at least some time before Tara arrives, hopefully it'll be alright.
Now, a few questions (even though I know they might be answered in future chapters): What is wrong with Arlene, and why does she care about foster children?
Do the Harry Potter characters know about this mess? Probably not, but I mean, Amy is related to Minerva and to Sirius, and so forth. Does Minerva at least know her (daughter?) relative Catherine lived in the States?
Now that Simon has a half-sister, is Willow still his heir? Or would Clarice not want to be, and so Willow would remain heir anyway?
Lastly, power. We know the Charmed Ones are powerful, and we know how much more powerful (for now) their older generation is. But do we have power ratings? Sheila was supposedly incredibly powerful. Willow is even more. How powerful is Willow (or how powerful will she be) in comparison with all the other witches here? Moreover, what is their power compared to Wand Wavers? Willow could resurrect the dead, which Simon says (heh, it's a game) is practically impossible. The Wand Wavers (even their most powerful, such as Albus) say the same. Does that make Willow even more powerful than then, or any other witch more powerful than those wand wavers?
Lastly, is there a family tree? That is, I understand the relationships fine, but it'd be nice to see it clarified so we can figure out exactly how they're related, and how many overlapping relations they have. and if you're doing that, could you do a power ranking (it would need to be a future power rating, I guess) for the witches?
I really really like this, and will continue onwards with much pleasure. Can't wait for replies, Meneldur.
Comments from author:
Thank you, I'm flattered by your compliments. I find the interrelationships of the characters to be a very interesting and if the worlds are not blended together properly, it jars. I''m glad you like it.

Quite a few people want to see Willow with Tara. But considering my writing speed, it will take years to get there...College is several seasons away.

I will let you find out about 1)
2)Amy is related to Minerva, the woman who possesed her is a long ago ancestor of Sirius. The Wand Wizards are aware that many of their numbers left, but assume they have turned muggle or are otherwise uninteresting.
3) The heir is whoever Simon names heir, it's an interesting little Meier foible. THe first generation gets an annuity, but everyone after that must fend for themselves. (It is actually prety rare for the Meiers to have more than one child/son, Gabriel was the last.)

As for power, Willow has the most potential, as she has both Spirit and Earth. The Charmed Ones are more powerful in Spirit, but can barely channel, their combined power is very considerable however. A good deal of power is experience. All the elder witches have that in spades. But to put it bluntly, Sheila required a full Circle of Thirteen to hold her, and the witches in that were amongst the most powerful in the Concordat, led by a fully leyed up Simon. That gives you an idea.

The respective power levels of Wand and channeling magic users will be dealt with in a later chapter of Shaggy dog, so I hope you'll forgive me not explaining that here.

There is a family tree, it can be found at the Waifs and Strays forum. It's not in tree form, it won't upload. I'd advise not looking at it yet, as it is up to date and contains spoilers.

Thanks for the compliments, glad you''re enjoying it and I hope the replies satisfy somewhat. Thanks for reviewing
Review By [Meneldur] • Date [14 Nov 11] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Breakfasts and basements" from Meneldur
Review:
So, got up to here. Not much to say. Really like everything you've been doing. Well developed characters, good detail on the visual. Simon isn't a Gary Stu yet, and even if he gets superpowers, eh has such a plethora of issues it wouldn't matter much. The relationship with Joyce and their reactions (as well as Dawn's and Buffy's) were believable, which is impressive, considering the whirlwind aspect of it. I actually really liked the date at the ballet, especially all the luxurious touches. I also love jewels, and loved your inclusion of famous jewelry.
Main idea so far seems to be the Scoobies having a normal family life, which will no doubt help them greatly. After all, it seems most of their major future problems come from them being teenagers without enough parental influence. Even when they're dealing with outside threats which are not their fault, a steadying and guiding hand heavier (and more practical) than Rupert's would have benefited them greater. So I'm 100% behind you on that.
Lastly, does Willow even know she's basically the girl Simon was planning to pick as his heir? I love how you connected between them, in any case. But it may give her another much-needed self-esteem boost. And by showing her (and everyone's) weakness, you reveal how much help they all need, and how many problems (which festered) they had. Is it even relevant that Willow is Simon's 6th or whatever cousin, now that he seems to be adopting all the Scoobies as his family anyway? Does it come with some magical inheritance, or headship of the family? Because even if (when) he marries Joyce, such an old line may have blood stipulations, especially regarding magic.
Pairings... I'll wait for the future. There's still much to read. If I can reach chapter 32 tomorrow, I'll probably stop and review there, and go on to the next fics in order of reading. Most likely I'll raise some real questions then.
That's all for now, I think. I'm for sleep; perchance to dream. Hope this helps, and can't wait to get back to it.
Comments from author:
Quite far already, I;d say. Thank you. I do hope to keep Simon from going Gary Stu. I considered lenghtening the courtship, but neither of them seemed to listen. Joyce is quite a forward little minx. ;-) The ballet date is one of my favourites, it''s the first time it really was brought home to Joyce just how rich Simon really is... I''m only sad that so many of the Jewels I''d loved to have seen were broken up.

Yes, the premisse of the story is to give the Scoobies a stable and loving and supportive homelife. Rupert is very nice and all, but he only really started to take an interest around season two.

Willow does not know yet at this point. Willow is the youngest of Simon's living relatives. Sheila is unsuitable. A lot of your questions you''ve caught up with by now, so I won''t answer them.

Hope you had a good night's rest, glad you''re enjoying this and thanks for reviewing.
Review By [Meneldur] • Date [13 Nov 11] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Silver linings" from Eureka
Review:
Holy hand grenades batman! So MORE soul sucking mummies were made, Brenda is out and Pru is being manhandled by a butch... Hopefully the others will see/figure out what is going on soon so that Pru is NOT raped and nobody else is hurt by those soul sucking mummies. Also hope that Ampata is helped in the process.
Comments from author:
Yup, more soul sucking mummies. Gotta love soul sucking mummies. And yes, things are pretty dark right now.

Thanks for reviewing.
Review By [Eureka] • Date [13 Nov 11] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Silver linings" from Panaka
Review:
Not bad, but I couldn't suspend my disbelief at the family at least not being able to tell the two jail birds apart. It, and fem|Bubba, broke the chapter for me.
Comments from author:
Actually the family figured it out pretty soon, as will be told next chapter. Fem-Bubba? Heh. That will be explained next chapter as well.

Thanks for reviewing.
Review By [Panaka] • Date [12 Nov 11] • Rating [6 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Silver linings" from Blackett
Review:
Ooh come on! Can't those bas..rds just stay dead?!!! Also....poor Prue!! Great update as always.
Comments from author:
Nope, the scum rises to the top. Poor Prue, indeed.

Thanks for reviewing.
Review By [Blackett] • Date [12 Nov 11] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Silver linings" from LordSchmodder
Review:
I am very interested in discovering what's up with Tony and Roger. Nice touch.
Comments from author:
Thank you, I've never seen it before.

Thanks for reviewing.
Review By [LordSchmodder] • Date [12 Nov 11] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Silver linings" from AllenPitt
Review:
Brenda & Pru just have no luck. Brenda likely to get murdered by Roger, meanwhile poor Pru. On the other hand, imagine the ginormous lawsuit resulting from this. First the police release the wrong prisoner, then the one who should have been released gets attacked in her cell with a guard standing by smirking? that'll work for the ordinary prisoner, but one that has wealthy & powerful relatives, heads will roll...
And of course Brenda gets blamed by the Halliwells. Ouch. Considering it was a 250g bond, and she had no money, I can't blame her for jumping at the chance to leave the jail. Meanwhile--she has just got to be a relative of some sort, exact twins like that only happen on tv shows! .
Meanwhile--Ampata's victims rise as similar soul-sucking mummy types? Ouch. And there's not even a sire bond like with a vamp, so they're out after Ampata or at least tony h is? yikes.
This is really putting a spoke in the wheel of the Master's plans. Just saying. And damn, he's actually a very good planner. One of the only vampires to manage to put together a large vamp organization; he's very charismatic, and ...considering he's trapped in that dimensional prison, managing to maintain control like that is just amazing, really. Turning 150-200 vamps for a storming of the house is a good idea, too.
Comments from author:
A ginormous lawsuit to be paid by the Sunnydale PD, yup. Brenda had her reasons, and she did do wrong.

No sire bond, though that seems to function pretty badly in some cases. Yes, the attack on Ampata will not go exactly as she had hoped.

I never understood why the Master was such a useless opponent. Besides the fact that the loose episodes were more fun, but hey.

Thanks for reviewing.
Review By [AllenPitt] • Date [12 Nov 11] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Silver linings" from DarkTopaz
Review:
I am starting to hate your cliff hangers you get us wound up then don't deliver.
Comments from author:
I fear that is the nature of Cliffhangers. And the serial publication of most fanfics. I do hope you''ll continue to read.
Thanks for reviewing.
Review By [DarkTopaz] • Date [12 Nov 11] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Silver linings" from EllandrahSylver
Review:
Okay, wow...

Lots of things happening here. First off, I feel so bad for Xander. His father's dead, and his mom doesn't care if he lives or dies. Foster parents who want to adopt him is an awesome thing, but that has still got to hurt. I'm glad he already had a solid foundation in his new family before it happened, though. It could have been so much worse.

Willow's thoughts, feelings and reactions were so touching, and believable. Joyce is pretty good at the mom thing. *grins*

The Halliwells... Yeowch! Okay, first thing, the insert of Paige was sneaky and clever and entertaining, coming from the side like it did. Prue's experiences in the jail look like they're going to open a massive can of worms. I felt sorry for Brenda, although I actually had to read that whole sequence a couple times before it clicked what was going on. It was a little muddled, but that might just be me. Oh, point of interest - something I noticed in the last chapter but forgot to say something about, just because it's a small, stupid thing, but Brenda Walsh's twin from 90210's name is Brandon, not Brendan. *flushes* I watched that show when I was in high school. I though Jason Priestley was cute.

One thing I'm a bit confused about though... although you'll probably explain it later, so I can wait to see later chapters, but... what's with the mummy's victims rising? I don't remember that happening in the episode. What's the point? *grins* It's a puzzle to look forward to figuring out...
Comments from author:
Xander hurts a lot. It will take time for him and WIllow to recover from the neglect and abuse.

Joyce is indeed pretty good at the mom thing, I think.

Prue's fate will have to wiat until the next installment. Brandon Walsh. I avoided it in High school (the equivalent) ;-) Check. I will alter that later. And for the Mummy victims, that will be explained.


Thanks for reviewing.
Review By [EllandrahSylver] • Date [12 Nov 11] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Silver linings" from war
Review:
Nice to see Xander get a good family. Poor Ampata, wants to do the right thing but the only choices she sees are bad ones. hope for Brenda's sake they arrive in time to save Prue or things could get ugly for her.

Good story looking forward to your next chapter.
Comments from author:
Yup, Xander will officially get different parents. If anything happens to Prue, Brenda is going to be in deep kimchee.


Thanks and thanks for reviewing.
Review By [war] • Date [12 Nov 11] • Rating [8 out of 10]
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