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Blue Belle: Director's Cut

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Review of chapter "Chapter 38" from raxadian
Review:
So, is this whole traveling the realms a setup for the Frozen crossover? As in Amora, traveled to that mystical land by accident while using the less used paths, and found Loki and Thor granddaughters?
Comments from author:
Actually, I hadn't even thought of that one to be honest. It's more a setup for how Amora can move around the realms (which might become important later, hint hint) and how Thrúd and Amora have more experience with modern Midgard than would have been permitted by the temporary destruction of the Bifröst. :)
Review By [raxadian] • Date [6 Apr 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 38" from Judedeath
Review:
I don't really have much of substance to say, I liked the new bit with Coulson and the others, it's always nice to see more Darcy because she's one of my favorites, I am interested to hear more about Coulson and his death and who he met. I do really like how you attempt to blend the different universes and I do feel most times it works out pretty well.

One mistake I noticed was in the paragraph where Coulson is talking with Claire about Kára at the end it says "Lewis nodded gratefully" I don't believe that's correct as at this point Darcy was still drinking and nowhere near the conversation. I actually went back to double check.
Comments from author:
I'll have to check this when I get home. I'm not even gonna lie, I wouldn't be surprised if there were some bad grammatical/logical errors in this. I rewrote it literally six times. One version had a nameless agent, and three of the remaining five versions had Claire staying outside the entire time. Also with Lewis and Wise being one letter away from anagram status, there's a chance that I typed in 'Wisel' or something by accident and Scrivener 'helpfully' turned it into Lewis. Glad I'm done with Coulson's POV, to be honest; he's a fun character but his tendency to refer to anyone who's not a personal civilian friend by surname can be awkward. Especially since I bet a good 50% of Darcy fans forget what her last name even is, since it's mentioned only twice over the entirety of both Thor movies.
Review By [Judedeath] • Date [6 Apr 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 38" from JakStrife
Review:
Dude this is starting to suck. You said it was going to be about xander and now it's pretty much everyone else. Haven't even seen xander for a few chapters.
Comments from author:
Sorry, I guess you'll have to go read some of the other, more simply-plotted stories that have all Xander all the time with no interest in advancing other characters or having subplots? :)
Review By [JakStrife] • Date [6 Apr 14] • Rating [5 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter 38" from Meneldur
Review:
Surprisingly, I have very little of actual substance to say. Loved Amora, the Valkyries and Phil, along with the little we saw of Darcy and Wise. I really want more of them. Very good characterization and a few intriguing possibilities, but nothing particularly noteworthy, I felt. I really have to wonder what game Amora is playing, though.
As for Kate and Buffy, most of it I've seen. It seemed to be mainly exposition, otherwise, which was nice, but again, nothing major. I enjoyed what little we saw of Hawkeye and Bobbi, and how they relate towards each other and Kate. Otherwise, Buffy was mostly a distraction there, though no doubt SHIELD's help will hold her in good stead later.

EDIT: Of course!
Comments from author:
Did you at least notice the reference to you in the message in the end? ^_^
Review By [Meneldur] • Date [6 Apr 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 37" from (Recent Donor)nerfherder
Review:
Curious, you can add a true appendage to a girl but you cannot fix a broken spine? Love the tech you are throwing out there but like consistancy more. Marvel always peeved me with their little plot device defects. If one villain has mechanical eyes, why don't other heroes get em when they defeat them?
Comments from author:
Who - beyond you - said they can't fix a broken spine? I'm sure if Gwen paid, Hank would be willing to do it. Just like he made Felicia's tail in exchange for an exorbitant amount of money.
Review By [(Recent Donor)nerfherder] • Date [20 Mar 14] • Rating [9 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter 37" from DofEire
Review:
I'm pleased as heck to see the changes you'd mentioned incorporated (Astrid - Samantha, Cassie - Gwen), and I really do like how you write Nick Fury. He doesn't precisely *scream* 'BAMF', but it's not far off...maybe more of a refined bellow. :) I look forward to the next update.
Comments from author:
If you're really a BAMF? You ain't gotta scream it. People just know. :)
Review By [DofEire] • Date [18 Mar 14] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter 37" from skychan
Review:
Well I think I miss Astrid over Mary Jane. but I have to say that it doesn't really feel like that much has really changed from the first time I read this. Most of the interactions are the same, names changed perhaps to save the innocent and still the best part is the end with Captain America.

Honestly however I would have expected them to do a better job of tracking down the posessie in such a case. With his memory being quite enough to narrow things down to the point that once a city was located it would be a very short time to ID things. Excluding mutants when they are almost certainly involved (anything strange that happens means mutants have a high probability of involvement) just doesn't make sense. Add that they probably didn't necessarilly know that the cheer leaders were all mutants and it makes even further amounts of less sense.

I would sugest that the Mayor may have had things in place that slowed things down in some way. Procedural, etc etc. A spell that causes red tape whatever...
Comments from author:
Track them down using what? They have no photos of these girls, only Steve's drawings. So it all has to be done manually rather than through computerized pattern matching. From there... Cordelia has a license but most of the Cordettes don't. Santana does but Brittany doesn't. So there's no current (or even aged) visual identification of them in a national database. Even then, there's no guarantee either girl is a Sunnydale resident, so they'd need to scan through pictures of all the recently licensed girls in a pretty wide radius to determine that no, the girl they're looking for is not in a database. From there... if they somehow manage to determine definitively that the two girls were from Sunnydale? Which is making a reach for the reason I pointed out above? They would need Steve or Natasha to sit down and go through the yearbook photos of twenty-one thousand, one hundred and seventy-five high school students. You read that right; I established a realistic population of Sunnydale based on the fact that it replaces the entire Santa Barbara CUA in Whedon's universe, and so the high school population of my Sunnydale is roughly two-thirds the overall population of his Sunnydale. Granted you can slice that number roughly in half because the gender breakdown is 53/47 female to male in the region, but that's still over ten thousand girls' photos to look at.
Review By [skychan] • Date [18 Mar 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 37" from SamuraiSky
Review:
Loved both versions. The substitutions don't detract from the story, but bring in a different element.
Loved Fury's reaction as well. Of course seeing it in my head as Samuel L Jackson is pretty funny. Glad that you are including the movies in your creative process.
Comments from author:
Well, I had the movies that existed to date in the original version. The problem arose from me not paying attention to the timeline when I rewrote. Putting S2 in at 2011-2012 means that Halloween falls six months after the Battle of New York... and all the universe building that entails. So I've been modifying things as I post them to accommodate those changes.
Review By [SamuraiSky] • Date [17 Mar 14] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter 37" from chaosmancer
Review:
very well done. can't wait to see how Fury deal with cheerleaders.
Comments from author:
Thankfully, he has minions who can deal with that.
Review By [chaosmancer] • Date [17 Mar 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 37" from Meneldur
Review:
Well, you know I'd review anyway, but here goes...
So, you're definitely right about streamlining the cast of characters. Really, at some point, probably when the storylines begin to intersect, I'd post a Dramatis Personae, just so everybody will be clear on who's who, how they look and what they can do. Because if Brittany and Natasha having Black Widow attributes is just a bit confusing (especially since I don't recall Brittany mentioning it - keeping it close to the chest, I'd guess), how much more confusing is the new Spider Clan, especially when you start thinking about Janet and Hank's girls in the same place? So, good work on that, and fun interactions, even if it wasn't much different.
Same goes for the second section, I guess. It wasn't anything new, except maybe the last part being a clearer tie-in on how SHIELD will get directly involved in Sunnydale (in case kids with powers/Project X/X Men/Demon Activity/Mystique) wasn't enough.
Anyway, fun chapter, and I hope for more soon.
Review By [Meneldur] • Date [16 Mar 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 37" from raxadian
Review:
Yay, cheerleaders!
Comments from author:
Cheerleaders make EVERYTHING better.
Review By [raxadian] • Date [16 Mar 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 37" from Starfox
Review:
Good chapter - I loved the economic reasonings, and the interaction between Pym's and Stacy's girls. And of course STacy's thoughts when she accepted Felicia's offer. Fury's reaction to Steve's revelations was the crowning scene though.
Comments from author:
Just think, though... there are girls with Nat and Steve's brains running around in Sunnydale. And until now, we only knew who the latter was...
Review By [Starfox] • Date [16 Mar 14] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter 37" from Letomo
Review:
I'm not suggesting that Rogers wouldn't follow orders - he is a soldier. I'm suggesting that a 'power behind the throne' approach wouldn't work if the orders were ever, in Steve's mind, unethical or immoral.

Otherwise, I'm following this story because it is good, and interesting. Thanks for sharing it!
Comments from author:
Except there has been a power behind his throne for the entirety of his career. That's what you're not getting. Several of the Avengers, generals and the like during World War II, Fury and Coulson in the MCU, et cetera. That's something a soldier like Steve would accept. Unless you're part of that 0.001%, there is always someone telling you what to do, and usually someone telling them what to tell you to do.
Review By [Letomo] • Date [16 Mar 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 37" from Judedeath
Review:
So I don't have a lot to say, I liked the chapter, but I liked the previous version too, I do feel the sciency perspective does help the story, even when the tangent about people are smarter than her this chapter feels more focused and character building than the old one.

I was a little disappointed to see Cassie switched with Sam but your note at the end fixed that, quick question though, when you say closer to her comic incarnation do you mean 616? I'm only asking because this story has a lot of Ultimate Universe stuff.
Comments from author:
I felt that the benefits of bringing in Samantha - such as her intelligence and genetic disorder - outweighed the loss of Cassie, who was essentially a CINO at that point anyway. And yes, I mean that she will appear as Scott's daughter at some point. Possibly having stolen Pym Particles from Scott. I'm not sure how old she'll be in this; Scott is in his mid-thirties and so she can be anywhere from... well, if it was a high school indiscretion that he manned up about, she could even be a legal adult already. Not sure yet in that regard.
Review By [Judedeath] • Date [16 Mar 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 37" from Raider
Review:
I noticed you omitted fury himself being disabled in this iteration.
Comments from author:
Yeah, I had done the old version before Cap 1 was out much less IM2 or Avengers. So I'd started developing the universe in some different ways that I decided I didn't like because it would make things hard to keep consistent with future installments of the MCU.
Review By [Raider] • Date [16 Mar 14] • Rating [10 out of 10]
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